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Husbands & Boyfriends in Prison For everyone who has a husband, boyfriend or male partner incarcerated.

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  #1  
Old 04-14-2012, 12:55 AM
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Default Everybody knows everything in prison... bf ran into some guys who know me

OMG i feel soo bad...so my hunny says everyone finds out about everything in there....he ran into a couple of guys that knew me...not sure wat was said about me but if my hunn pressed the issue it wasn't nothing good...He said that it doesn't matter to him because that was my past...and he is my present and my future...but i know he feels insecure about me...he so called says he always keeps it 100% but something tells me he's not commited all the way like me....maybe its just my imagination and I'm trippin...I'm confused O_o
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  #2  
Old 04-14-2012, 01:38 AM
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when it comes to your past, well that is your past and nothing you or him can do about that so that is just what it is. When it comes to the prestent (and future): if you got nothing to hide than you got nothing to worry about.

You say he can be inserure at times, maybe your feeling of him not being 100% commited may come out of (unaware) insecurities as well. I mean being apart is not an easy ride so feelings can play tricks - IF YOU LET THEM....if he has not given you any reason to doubt his commitment than do not let your mind play tricks with you, that is such a waste of energy which you could be using on positive issues instead.
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Old 04-14-2012, 09:49 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lazysbby
OMG i feel soo bad...so my hunny says everyone finds out about everything in there....he ran into a couple of guys that knew me...not sure wat was said about me but if my hunn pressed the issue it wasn't nothing good...He said that it doesn't matter to him because that was my past...and he is my present and my future...but i know he feels insecure about me...he so called says he always keeps it 100% but something tells me he's not commited all the way like me....maybe its just my imagination and I'm trippin...I'm confused O_o
It's like gossip gets around prison faster than out here lol but its ur past whether its good or bad its ur past and he will have to get over it he's ur present day and. Future and u should remind him of that. Something similar happen to me when my bf was in the county he ran into some guys that new me and jus started saying all sorts of.stuff some true and some very false . So my bf confronted me about it and I told him and I kept reassuring him that's my past and that He is my present and future. And told him we all have passes. But for him not worry obviously they didn't make it to my future so for him not to worry bout it that I'm with him and that's it .. and I also told him if HR doesn't trust me or believe me that its best to end things cause I dnt want him to put himself stress over my past and I dnt want him to put me through stress cause he don't trust me ! Have a heart to heart to him girl and explain what u feel u need to explain to him about ur past ! If he really loves u he will understand and he will love u even with whatever past u had .. good luck

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Old 04-14-2012, 09:58 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hismammys

It's like gossip gets around prison faster than out here lol but its ur past whether its good or bad its ur past and he will have to get over it he's ur present day and. Future and u should remind him of that. Something similar happen to me when my bf was in the county he ran into some guys that new me and jus started saying all sorts of.stuff some true and some very false . So my bf confronted me about it and I told him and I kept reassuring him that's my past and that He is my present and future. And told him we all have passes. But for him not worry obviously they didn't make it to my future so for him not to worry bout it that I'm with him and that's it .. and I also told him if HR doesn't trust me or believe me that its best to end things cause I dnt want him to put himself stress over my past and I dnt want him to put me through stress cause he don't trust me ! Have a heart to heart to him girl and explain what u feel u need to explain to him about ur past ! If he really loves u he will understand and he will love u even with whatever past u had .. good luck

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Old 04-14-2012, 10:26 AM
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My first name is not common with people in my age group, but a lot of little girls have it now. So when when some newbie got to my man's dorn and started talkin bout a chick with the same name my man went to questioning me. I'm not sure if dude was trying to try him (my nam is visibily tattood on him) or if it was a strange coicedence(spelling lol), but the last thing I wanted was my name flying around the prison.
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Old 04-14-2012, 06:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hismammys

It's like gossip gets around prison faster than out here lol but its ur past whether its good or bad its ur past and he will have to get over it he's ur present day and. Future and u should remind him of that. Something similar happen to me when my bf was in the county he ran into some guys that new me and jus started saying all sorts of.stuff some true and some very false . So my bf confronted me about it and I told him and I kept reassuring him that's my past and that He is my present and future. And told him we all have passes. But for him not worry obviously they didn't make it to my future so for him not to worry bout it that I'm with him and that's it .. and I also told him if HR doesn't trust me or believe me that its best to end things cause I dnt want him to put himself stress over my past and I dnt want him to put me through stress cause he don't trust me ! Have a heart to heart to him girl and explain what u feel u need to explain to him about ur past ! If he really loves u he will understand and he will love u even with whatever past u had .. good luck

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Thanks for ur advice girl... I feel all confused because well i have kind of a effd up past...but so does he...and well i don't worry about it becase yes past is past no matter what...
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Old 04-14-2012, 06:22 PM
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my papi is always saying that our past is the past. that we are each others future our fears can some times be way worse than the reality of a situation. i'm meaning....he said (to you) the past is over. you are the one feeling/worrying now that somethings not right. just listen to him. that's not to say a person shouldn't listen to their gut instinct though. this just seems to be more of a case of worry and wonder and second guessing things.
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Old 04-15-2012, 03:13 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lazysbby

Thanks for ur advice girl... I feel all confused because well i have kind of a effd up past...but so does he...and well i don't worry about it becase yes past is past no matter what...
Ur past is ur past and it made u the girl u are now and if he can't accept the past u have he shouldn't be in ur future

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  #9  
Old 04-15-2012, 03:23 PM
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Others are right your past is your past! Trust and believe everybody got a past. That why we don't live in the past and look to the present and future! Keep ya head up and everything will turn out alright!
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Old 04-15-2012, 03:30 PM
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I am kinda glad I grew up with my Fiance' because he is well aware of my past and he knows it is not a good one. Hello I had 4 kids by the time I was 21 so it is what it was. He definitely does not hold my past against me because he sees I am so far from what I use to be. Even though I dissed him when we was young he still trust that I am all in with him and that I will never put any other man before him. Some of my old associates tried to blast me on facebook and I simply told them if you can not come up with some mess that at least have something to do with the years beginning in the 2000s then please miss me with that. I guess they felt dumb because they couldn't.
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Old 04-15-2012, 03:32 PM
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My man and I have traded all the past stories. Total transparency. So this way if anyone says did you know she.. or do you know he... we can both say YES, i knew that already. Hard to hurt someone with the past if the past isnt a secret.
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