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Old 02-03-2011, 01:27 PM
kryptonite98 kryptonite98 is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
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I have seen both perspectives listed on this thread. My first husband started using drugs. Those drugs changed him from the nice respectable man that I married to a very angry man full of rage. He attacked me one day. It was un provoked. So i divorced him. He continued using. One night he got high and murdered a mutual friend of ours. Now he is in prison. I felt the pain of the loss of a friend, the pain of the loss of a soul mate to the wicked ways of the world, I felt the pain of my baby girl not having normal life with a mom and a dad in the same house. My ex never reached out for us via mail and neither did I reach out for him. I moved on with my life and got remarried. My heart has always hurt for my first husband and the way his life turned out. Now two years into my second marriage, I find out my stepson raped my daughter. Now he to is headed for prison, and my second marriage is also about to be over because of what has happened. I can not expect my current husband to turn his back on his boys, but at the same time can not stand by his side as he is there for them. I need to move on and continue getting help for my daughter. About two weeks ago I got a letter from my first husband. They have found out that he has cancer and he wants to reconnect with my daughter. They do not know what kind but based on the results of the ct scan it appears to be in 3 of his major organs. The prison did not send him for his biopsy because they forgot to order them. He has complained on deaf ears at the prison. Now after all this he signed a medical release for me. Now I am helping see that he gets the medical treatment that he needs. I want him to be able to get better. I want him to be a loving example of how you can make bad choices in life, but be able to stop the old you ask for forgiveness and do something positive with your life. I tell you all of this because life is all about perspective. When he killed my friend, there was hurt and anger. Which over time passed. When I saw what my daughter was going through growing up without a dad, I had another perspective of sadness. Over time God has healed my heart. I have learned to hate the sin and not the sinner when it comes to my 1st husband. Now with the second one it is a whole new story. There was nothing that he ever did to me It was his children. Now he has lost a son to the system and his wife and stepchildren. As heartbreaking as it is I had to move on alone with my girls. I am having a very hard time just hating the sin now, but know God is still working on my heart. For those die hard DP supporters, maybe they have not been given a perspective to change their views. There are many times that I have questioned what in the world is going on in my life and if God was not by my side I don't know what I would do. People need not have tunnel vision and see others perspective when jumping on a ban wagon. Now when it comes to mass murders and those who hurt children, I think the should be cell mates. They should just go be crazy together. Just thought I would throw that one in. My oldest daughter applied to this program and she had to answer many questions. She was asked who her inspiration in life was and why. I cried when I read it. It said my mother because no matter what life has dealt us she always finds a way to keep going and see to it that we have what we need no matter how bad the situation might be. Ok enough rambling and I hope someone is helped by this post. May God bless you....even the atheist.
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