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-   -   ALABAMA Marriage Q&A Thread (http://www.prisontalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=25983)

Care9 09-13-2003 03:27 PM

ALABAMA Marriage Q&A Thread
 
THIS IS THE PROCESS AS I RECEIVED IT FROM THE CLERK OF COURT IN THE COUNTY WHERE WE WERE TO BE MARRIED.

I made myself a list and then went over it with the Clerk of Court to make sure I understood it all. She assured me that I had it absolutely correct! This is what I wrote:

1. Get the following from the Warden:
a. Approval form from DOC
b. James' id ~ name, date of birth, ss #
2. Take this info to court house in Clayton and present this
info AND my: Driver's license
ss card
divorce papers if formerly married
AND GET AN APPLICATION AND FORMS ~~ one set for
James and one for ME to sign. (SIgning mine was
easy enough but I had to THEN.......
3. Take the forms to the prison and have James sign
them n front of the Warden.
4. Bring it BACK to the courthouse to be
recorded.
5. Either keep it with my own stuff OR bring it back to the
Warden for safekeeping. (Ya right, guess which one I
did.) :-)
6. Bring all with me on day of wedding.
7. Application good for 30 days only.
8. $48 fee

We had MANY diversions to this and the Chaplain told me James had NO such id (photo prison id) (can you believe this?) And sent me back to the courthouse WITHOUT an id and told me to tell them there is no such thing. ???
He also sent me back to the courthouse (a SECOND time after I got the id thing straightened out!) with NOT the correct forms and he refused to sign them, said he would only sign them AFTER the wedding, lol. After I had been back and forth to the courthouse FOUR TIMES in one day (a 36 mile roundtrip!) the Probate judge finally told me that if they gave me ANY MORE and she meant even one IOTA of trouble, I was to call her and SHE would come out to the prison and marry us herself, lol!!!
So there you have it, the PROCESS that we were told we needed and I followed every step the right way.
We were also required to have counselling sessions but since I live so far away, they made us have only one lonnnnnng one. That is a story in and of itself. What a hoot. When he asked me if we were planning to have children when James was released, I almost choked and James kicked me under the table because he KNEW I was gonna blow a gasket. I asked the chaplain if I could answer the question candidly and he said "Yes of course" so I said "Well, sir -- by the time he is scheduled for his next hearing, I will be more than 56 years old. I have nine children. Been there, done that." And let it go at that. He didn't even respond to my answer!! I mean, come on......didn't he even READ our file???? Anyhow, my other favorite thing was he wanted to know WHY did I want to marry him because did I know that Alabama didn't have conjugal visits. Again, James kicked me under the table. I WANTED to stand up and say "Look at me, Mr. Chaplain, do I look like I need to marry a man 1000 miles away and one in prison at that, just to get laid?" But of course I didn't. And he also wanted to make sure that I knew James could not go to the courthouse and take care of all the paperwork and that I would have to do that.
Like I said, those are just the high points of the "counselling" ~~ in the end, they refused to marry us anyhow. Said I had to find our own minister. I am POSITIVE they didn't think I could pull it off. A Yankee...in the bible belt.......boyfriend in prison...........I don't know ANYONE in the area. I am SURE they thought they were sending me on a wild goose chase.
Ha! They should have read my file closer and saw that I have nine kids. I don't give up.
Well, this is probably not the info you needed, Mrs. D. So feel free to delete me. But thanks anyhow for letting me blow off some humor over the whole thing. I'm fairly sure other Alabama marriages have been much simpler to pull off!!
Care

Care9 09-13-2003 03:28 PM

Not a major big deal, but make that trip a FORTY six mile round trip each time!! :-)
Care

mrsdragoness 09-13-2003 04:25 PM

Thanks Care!!! This is what I'm looking for!

Sally

danielle 09-13-2003 04:36 PM

I think that's some great information - also glad you pulled it off!! :)

Care9 09-13-2003 04:40 PM

OHMYGOSH, and I thought you were gonna kick me to the curb for being so evasive, lol. All I can say is.........if you are getting married and your man is at Easterling...............buckle your seatbelt and keep your sense of humor. Oh, I wanna say one more thing that I remembered about the 'counselling' ~~~ he told us how it was IMPERATIVE that James be the (you ready?) HEAD OF THE HOME. (my legs, at this point, were getting bruises from being kicked under the table) and I said "Sir, I live one thousand miles away and only see him every four or five months. And, not being sarsastic or anything, but your Warden has removed all of our phone privileges.......HOW IS HE GOING TO BE THE HEAD OF THE HOME WHEN WE CANNOT COMMUNICATE ON A DAILY BASIS? (I didn't want to mention the fact that, there is NO WAY JOSE that I am gonna let ANYBODY be the Head of the Home. I don't mind being PARTNERS but wait just a darn minute, I have built this HOME and CHILDREN for the past 3 decades and all of a sudden, I"m going to make my husband who is in PRISON a thousand miles away Head of anything but maybe my heart. Grrrrrrrr, oh I'm not MAD about it, I just think it is sorta funny and that is ONE of the reasons they wouldn't marry us..........we didn't embrace enough of the Christian principles that they felt were the ONLY way a marriage can be 'successful' and (in his words) unless Christ is head of the home and we follow his commandments, our marriage is doomed from the beginning."
BRUISES, BRUISES, BRUISES. Took my legs a lonnnnnng time to clear up after these "marriage counselling sessions" lol lol lol lol lol lol
Care
(whos only sanity is seeing the humor in life!)

E1950 09-19-2003 06:50 PM

St. Clair In Springville Al
 
WE WERE MARRIED AT ST. CLAIR IN SPRINGVILLE AL. IN 1995. .WE HAD NO PROBLEMS AT THE COURT HOUSE. I WAS ABLE TO TAKE IN A CAKE AND SOME DRINKS, PLUS VISIT FOR 1 HOURS AFTERWARD. I WAS THER FOR 2 HOURS TOTAL. HE DID TALK TO US ABOUT OUR KIND OF MARRIAGE..LOL BUT WE HAVE MADE IT INSPITE OF THE SITUATION WE ARE IN. THAT WAS 8 YEARS AGO AND WE ARE STILL GOING STRONG!!!! SUE

ms_p62 02-18-2004 12:56 AM

My boyfriend and I are trying to get married,but he's currently in Kilby beeing processed.Love this site.Good Luck to everyone.

stickvb 02-21-2006 01:11 AM

My fiance and I will be married in March 2007. He goes up for parole Jan. 2007, but even if he doesnt get out I am gonna marry that sweet man of mine in prison or not, because I love him with all my heart.

BillysCharm 09-29-2006 08:57 AM

Married at Ventress
 
:) My husband and I were married at Ventress Conrrectional Facility in Clayton, Alabama. We had to go to marriage counseling (if that is what you want to call it) before they would let us get married. It basically consisted of the chaplain talking to us (about 6 couples) and telling us to make sure that we really know this person and that how he had one guy get married and then go out to his lover after the ceremony basically trying to make the women change their minds and doubt their loved one's sexuality. It took a couple of months to get everything in order we were allowed only 4 guests that had to be preapproved and we were allowed one camera and a small cake. I was able to bring wedding bands but his could not cost over $25. I was able to wear clothes that were allowed for visits and then he had to were the custom white state issued clothes (yuck) The chaplain did not marry us due ot his religion Assembly of God we were married by the probate judge and the ladies at the courthouse were very helpful in getting the marriage licenses issued and so forth they were the most pleasant in this whole situation (Barbour County) for the marriage license and the jusge to marry us it was $63. The most frustrating though was the chaplain he had a don't care attitude and was not helpful he tried his best to discourage you. But he did not suceed we are married and it is tough but love will survive.:thumbsup:

lonelyathome 09-29-2006 11:00 AM

My finace just got the wedding packet. He signed what he has to and is going to mail me the rest. Then i will call the chaplin chris and him get along great so thats encouraging!! My concern is that i am in Vermont and vt doc ships our men to KY TN and now OK. So i go to Ky to see him. I am worried about getting the lisence. Do i have to go to Ky to get it? or online? I cant go back and forth its expensive. I am hoping to get every thing together by Dec. I am going down for Christmas so we are hoping to marry on that visit. I want to say congrats to you. My family does not support my relationship with Chris at all. They are actually not speaking to me.. i am shut out i guess. But i am happy and i deserve to be happy as our men do. Some people can change and he has proven that he has. He went in when he was 19 hes now 33 and has 15months left. Then i get to show Chris what its like to have a family and love in your life and SUPPORT!

Jennifer_GP 10-20-2006 10:49 PM

My fiance is at Childersburg Work Release. He requested the papers from the chaplain, it took about 3 months to recieve them. He filled his part out then sent them to me and I filled out mine. The form was only two pages it just asked if we've been married before and how the marriage was dissoved and asked if we have any kids in our present relationship. It asked for us to give a brief statement as to why we thought we should be granted the approval to get married. We have to have 5 counseling sessions at once a month, we are allowed to have 8 guests, at the ceremony, I am to bring the liscense, the cake, plasticware, sodas, 1 unloaded camera, and our wedding rings. we sent the form back in a month ago and are still waiting to take our first session with the chaplain.

mrs. clemons 05-27-2007 11:02 PM

Married at Holman????
 
I have read many posts about this issue, but I have not come across a post to where there has been a actual wedding take place.... If there has been please let all of us waiting to marry the love of our lives know, and give all the details that we will have to face.

angela.judd 12-23-2011 02:19 AM

Getting Married at Draper
 
The love of my life is at Draper prison in Alabama and we want to get married there. has anyone had any experiences getting married there and what can i expect:D

GabesWifeyBoo 12-26-2011 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by angela.judd (Post 6510806)
The love of my life is at Draper prison in Alabama and we want to get married there. has anyone had any experiences getting married there and what can i expect:D


My future hubby is at Draper too and we are waiting until after the holidays to put in a request for marriage. I'm interested in your question too!! Nice to see a fellow "Draperite" on PT. :)

mzwarr3n 12-27-2011 12:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Care9 (Post 252135)
THIS IS THE PROCESS AS I RECEIVED IT FROM THE CLERK OF COURT IN THE COUNTY WHERE WE WERE TO BE MARRIED.

I made myself a list and then went over it with the Clerk of Court to make sure I understood it all. She assured me that I had it absolutely correct! This is what I wrote:

1. Get the following from the Warden:
a. Approval form from DOC
b. James' id ~ name, date of birth, ss #
2. Take this info to court house in Clayton and present this
info AND my: Driver's license
ss card
divorce papers if formerly married
AND GET AN APPLICATION AND FORMS ~~ one set for
James and one for ME to sign. (SIgning mine was
easy enough but I had to THEN.......
3. Take the forms to the prison and have James sign
them n front of the Warden.
4. Bring it BACK to the courthouse to be
recorded.
5. Either keep it with my own stuff OR bring it back to the
Warden for safekeeping. (Ya right, guess which one I
did.) :-)
6. Bring all with me on day of wedding.
7. Application good for 30 days only.
8. $48 fee

We had MANY diversions to this and the Chaplain told me James had NO such id (photo prison id) (can you believe this?) And sent me back to the courthouse WITHOUT an id and told me to tell them there is no such thing. ???
He also sent me back to the courthouse (a SECOND time after I got the id thing straightened out!) with NOT the correct forms and he refused to sign them, said he would only sign them AFTER the wedding, lol. After I had been back and forth to the courthouse FOUR TIMES in one day (a 36 mile roundtrip!) the Probate judge finally told me that if they gave me ANY MORE and she meant even one IOTA of trouble, I was to call her and SHE would come out to the prison and marry us herself, lol!!!
So there you have it, the PROCESS that we were told we needed and I followed every step the right way.
We were also required to have counselling sessions but since I live so far away, they made us have only one lonnnnnng one. That is a story in and of itself. What a hoot. When he asked me if we were planning to have children when James was released, I almost choked and James kicked me under the table because he KNEW I was gonna blow a gasket. I asked the chaplain if I could answer the question candidly and he said "Yes of course" so I said "Well, sir -- by the time he is scheduled for his next hearing, I will be more than 56 years old. I have nine children. Been there, done that." And let it go at that. He didn't even respond to my answer!! I mean, come on......didn't he even READ our file???? Anyhow, my other favorite thing was he wanted to know WHY did I want to marry him because did I know that Alabama didn't have conjugal visits. Again, James kicked me under the table. I WANTED to stand up and say "Look at me, Mr. Chaplain, do I look like I need to marry a man 1000 miles away and one in prison at that, just to get laid?" But of course I didn't. And he also wanted to make sure that I knew James could not go to the courthouse and take care of all the paperwork and that I would have to do that.
Like I said, those are just the high points of the "counselling" ~~ in the end, they refused to marry us anyhow. Said I had to find our own minister. I am POSITIVE they didn't think I could pull it off. A Yankee...in the bible belt.......boyfriend in prison...........I don't know ANYONE in the area. I am SURE they thought they were sending me on a wild goose chase.
Ha! They should have read my file closer and saw that I have nine kids. I don't give up.
Well, this is probably not the info you needed, Mrs. D. So feel free to delete me. But thanks anyhow for letting me blow off some humor over the whole thing. I'm fairly sure other Alabama marriages have been much simpler to pull off!!
Care

I was wondering how counciling could be done if you were a long distance from the prison because i am 5 hours away. I was worried because i knew counciling was a must but to make 3 trips would be a lil much. Callin the chaplin in the am to see if he will do that for us:)

MissVal1920 02-26-2012 12:48 PM

Please post any updates or changes that you've encountered with getting married in Alabama. Thanks!!

supremequeen40 07-23-2012 03:23 AM

7-23-12

My fiance is at Fountain Correctional Facility. He has already put in the request for marriage and we have been put on the waiting list. When he last checked we were number 39 on the list. The request went in in April 2012, and we were put on the waiting list for marriage May 2012. I was hoping that the Chaplin would have given the necessary papers to those waiting to get married ahead of time. That way some of the paperwork could already be done and the only thing left to do would be to get the marriage license done when the date has been set. We could have had the counseling session done or been half way through it, but he would not allow it. Richard was told we had to wait until we were next on the list. The chaplin can try and discourage me but it will not work. He can not touch what God brought together. I already have the rings, just waiting on the rest.

ShonCupcake 07-25-2012 09:21 AM

My fiance is at FOUNTAIN and we're getting married AUGUST 29th!!! I live in tx so i did my marriage counseling over the phone with no problems. The chaplain was cool but did give me alot of reasons i should reconsider marrying a inmate. HA...... Im not marrying a inmate im marrying my soulmate little did he know!!! Im extremely happy and we can have 8 guest,a cake,drinks,and a camera. Good luck to everyone

UTVols9901 12-24-2012 02:30 AM

Does anybody know what the process is at Maxwell to get married? I am new to this site. And have enjoyed reading all of the forums and comments. This lifestyle and type of situstion is not easy. Therefore, the most support possible is always great. My boyfriend and I met in college and have been together for 5 years in Feb. He was recently sentenced to 8 years in federal prison. Theres no doubt in my mind that he is who I want to spend the rest of my life with. So the idea of getting married while he is away has been talked about a few times. But I don't even know where to begin. Can anyone help me? Thank you so much!

LCarter12 01-04-2013 08:20 PM

Do anyone the process at Bibb county after all forms are filled out?

BO$$LADY 07-24-2014 08:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jennifer_GP (Post 2310228)
My fiance is at Childersburg Work Release. He requested the papers from the chaplain, it took about 3 months to recieve them. He filled his part out then sent them to me and I filled out mine. The form was only two pages it just asked if we've been married before and how the marriage was dissoved and asked if we have any kids in our present relationship. It asked for us to give a brief statement as to why we thought we should be granted the approval to get married. We have to have 5 counseling sessions at once a month, we are allowed to have 8 guests, at the ceremony, I am to bring the liscense, the cake, plasticware, sodas, 1 unloaded camera, and our wedding rings. we sent the form back in a month ago and are still waiting to take our first session with the chaplain.

How long did it take you to get married there?

mrschaneytob 08-09-2014 11:30 AM

my experience
 
Hello, I am new to this site. I am getting married to my best friend @Elmore later this month. We had to fill out a questionnaire a year ago this month. We started counseling sessions in november 2013. Sincethe chaplain has so many prisons, we just finished the 6th and final one in july 2014... we have a letter signed by warden for marriage to b approved. I hadchaplain request a few things for me which were approved. Now all I have to do isgo get marriage license. Not sure how that's gonna go

frostwoman1954 08-09-2014 02:40 PM

Talk to the chaplain. I know when I got married in Holman, the county clerk accepted it without a problem. BTW, congrats, sweetie!

Michele

BO$$LADY 09-14-2014 03:55 PM

My fiance is at Childersburg Work Center and has been there for 2 months. We were approved to get married after his first month there. We had our first counseling last Sunday, then the 2nd and last one today which is a week later. We also got our wedding date today, we will be joined as husband and wife on October 3, 2014 and we're very excited! The warden doesn't allow guests but I had to write a letter for our daughters to be approved and they were. I'm only allowed to bring our rings in with us on our wedding day and I will meet the Chaplain that morning at 9:00 am and we will go together to the courthouse to get the marriage license which is $45 cash he will sign for my fiance. Then we will go back to the chapel for the ceremony. There is one other couple getting married the same day, the ceremony will begin at noon.

Missy P 02-06-2015 12:19 AM

County jail
 
My fiance is in federal lock up in Baldwin county jail for the next couple of months can we get married in the county jail even though he's a federal inmate & I'm in a different state how would we seek counseling can anyone give me some info on that please


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