HELLO LADIES ALL OF YOU KNOW THAT WE HAVEN'T BEEN THE HAPPIEST COUPLE SINCE RICKY CAME HOME, BUT AS OF YESTERDAY IT IS OVER FOR GOOD. HE HAS RETURNED TO HIS TWEEKING, edit, please review PTO Language Policy, IRRESPONISBLE BABY'S MOM, AND HE LEFT ME AT HOME WITH MY SON, WITH NO CAR. SO I WENT LOOKING FOR IT AND I FOUND IT AT A MOMO, HE WAS THERE WITH HER I TOOK MY CAR BACK, I GOT HOME GOT ALL HIS CLOTHES, BLEACHED AND CUT UP EVERY LAST PIECE OF CLOTHING HE OWNS AND SHOES, AND I TORE ALL PICTURES, BROKE EVERY TROPHY AND EVERY LETTER. I PUT IN BAGS AND AT CHECK OUT TIME I WAS THERE WITH ONE OF MY HOMEBOYS WAITING FOR THEM TO COME OUT SO I CAN MY STUFF AND GIVE HIM HIS, SO SHE COMES OUT AND I CALL HER OUT AND SHE DOESN'T STEP UP, AND WHEN HE CAME UP TO ME HE COULDN'T EVEN LOOK AT ME, I THREW ALL HIS STUFF ON THE FLOOR OF THE PARKING LOT, AND TOLD HIM YOU KNOW WHEN SHE edit YOU OVER WHY DON'T YOU GIVE ME CALL SO I CAN LAUGH IN YOUR FACE AND MAKE SURE YOU KNOW THAT YOU LOST A GOOD THING, BUT HEY THAT'S WHAT YOU LIKE, A GIRL THAT HAS BEEN THROUGH ALL YOUR HOMEBOYS, AND LEAVES YOUR SON FOR WEEKS TO GET HIGH AND SLEEP AROUND, BUT EVERY DOG HAS HIS DAY AND YOUR DAY WILL COME YOU BEST BELEIVE THAT. GOT IN MY CAR TOOK OFF AND I WILL NEVER LOOK BACK. HE JUST COULD HAVE TOLD ME THAT HE WANTED TO GET BACK WITH HER AND I WOULD'VE LET HIM GO, BUT WORST PART OF ALL THIS IS THE ONE THAT WILL BE EFFECTED MORE WILL BE MY SON, BECAUSE RICKY WAS THE ONLY "DAD" HE KNEW AND NOW MY BABY CRYS FOR HIM, BUT YOU KNOW MY BABY IS 2 AND HE'S YOUNG ENOUGH TO WHERE HE WILL FORGET ABOUT HIM IN TIME AND I CAN FORGET ABOUT THIS WHOLE PERIOD IN MY LIFE. I REALLY HOPE THAT YOU ALL HAVE AGREAT NEW YEAR AND THAT THE NEXT YEAR WILL BE BETTER, BECAUSE I KNOW I AM GOING TO TRY AND HAVE A BETTER LIFE NEXT YEAR WITH NO DRAMA OR BABY'S MOMMAS.

((((hugs)))) to you and hopefully it is for the best. Happy New Year to you too!

WOW, that really sucks.I feel for you and your little boy.So sorry things dident work out for you, I hope you have a happy new year............. :o

Wow, but you know what...good for you for ending it here and now. It will get better, and you will have a great life. Best wishes for you in the new year.

N&R,

That is awful. You are a strong woman, and you handled it right. And your absolutely right, what goes around comes around, believe that. KARMA!!! ;) Keep your head up, and keep puttin your son first! Things will be alright in the end. :)

Nancy,
Hug.. I'm sorry you had to go through this, but you are better off without him.. You don't want that kind of a guy as a role model for your son. Ricky is the one that is gonna suffer in the end. He'll probably end up back in prison. You are a beautiful girl
you will look back at this time and realize that it wasnt meant to be. You are too good for him..

Dear Nancy&Ricky2as1 just became Dear Nancy&baby makes a happy family..I am so sorry to hear what happen to you..But on the bright side you are starting the new year off right...You'll both get over this and it sounds like it will make you even a better person than you have been..I wish you a very happy new year and may 2005 bring you joy hope and the love of your life...No drama...Best wishes, and may all your dreams come true....Happy new year to you and the little one...take it day by day....you'll be just fine....HUGGS

Nancy ~ I am so sorry that this happened. This is 100% his loss please know that. I know you are angry and hurt now and you have EVERY RIGHT to be. I know in time you will realize you have learned some valuable lessons here and the next man that comes into your life better come in straight forward cuz you will know the signs. If this is the kind of man Ricky is then he did you a favor, he saved you from a life of not knowing where you stand with him to being in a position to pursue a relationship down the road with someone more deserving. I wish you and your little one all the best. We're here for you. If you need me I'm only a PM away...

Much Love,
Patty

GIRL~STAY STRONG!
God bless you for going through that and not really hurting someone!
You are right it is his loss~and your baby will be a better person without him.
Right now stay focused on that beautiful baby of yours....

*PS~WAY TO GO ON THE BLEACHING AND SHREDDING!
I DIDN"T HAVE ENOUGH GUTS TO DO IT TO SCARY WHEN HE LEFT BEFORE.

I am sorry you had to go through this, but good for you for being strong. You and your son will get through this. I wish you both the best!

THANK YOU LADIES FOR EVERYTHING THAT YOU HAVE SAID NOW AND IN THE PAST. IN THE TIMES I NEEDED SOME ADVICE UNDERSTANDING YOU ALL HAVE BEEN THE ONES TO HELP SEE THE OPTIONS AND ENCOURAGEMENT I NEEDED. BUT I HAVEN'T CRIED WHICH SURPRISES EVERYONE. MY FRIENDS THINK THAT SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME BECAUSE I HAVEN'T CRIED BUT I FEEL THIS WAY IF ME MAKES ME CRY THEN HE HAS WON, AND A MAN THAT HAS NO RESPECT FOR HIMSELF ENOUGH TO EVEN COME CORRECT AND LET ME KNOW WHATS GOING ON, THEN REALLY DOESN'T DESERVE NOT ONE TEAR SHED. I HAVE MY PRIDE AND THAT WILL NOT LET ME GET WEAK AND CRY FOR A NO GOOD PIECE OF DOO DOO (for lack of using cursing) LIKE HIM. LIKE I SAID HE'LL GET HIS AT THE END WHEN HE'S GET SCREWED OVER BY THE ONE PERSON HE LEFT ME FOR AND THAT DAY HE'LL LOOK BACK AND REMEMBER ALL BULL HE PUT ME THROUGH. SO TO ALL YOU LADIES, AND TO MYSELF I TELL YOU NEVER EVER THINK THAT YOU HAVE TO STAY BECAUSE YOUR LONELY OR THAT'S ALL YOU DESERVE, BECAUSE FOR THAT ONE GUY THAT DID YOU WRONG, LIFE A HA GOOD MAN WAITING TO LOVE, HE JUST HASN'T CROSSED PATHS WITH YOU YET, AND RICKY WASN'T THE PERSON I THOUGHT HE WAS BUT I KNOW THERE'S SOMEONE FOR BUT IT'S ALL IN TIME, AND AS OF RIGHT NOW THE ONLY MAN I WANT IN MY LIFE IS ABOUT 2FT TALL WITH LIGHT BROWN HAIR AND TELLS ME HE LOVES ME ALL DAY EVERYDAY, MY SON RALPHY. THANKS AGAIN GIRLS FOR HELPING THROUGH EVERYTHING THROUGH OUT ALL THIS ROLLERCOASTER RIDE OF MY RELATIONSHIP WITH RICKY. HAVE A HAPPY NEW YEAR AND BE SAFE OUT THERE.

BELOW ARE SOME PICTURES OF MY LITTLE MAN, THE ONLY MAN IN MY LIFE.

Your son is adorable.. Hugs..

Nancy~ Girl, you sound like a very strong woman. Good luck to you this next year and I hope all goes well for you and your little man. He is adorable and loved by you. That is all he needs. As for Ricky~your right he will get his when his time comes.

Again Good Luck to you ~ you deserve a wonderful New Year!!

Nancy he is too cute.. Now that is a hell of a good reason to be happy for. I am sorry you had to go thru the pain that you are goin thru but i am glad that its the end of the year and you can start the new year off right and proper. You are strong and those days that you feel sad and weak just look at your son and draw you strength from him. '

Jillian

Never look back Nancy! This is your year and it's a new beginning. Ralphy is tooooooo cute!

**********************************************{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} }}}}}

Sheila

Sweetie your son is so adorable. I'm sorry this happen to you, but kudos to you for having the courage to do what is best for you and your lovely son. Hey I have to say the bleaching and shredding was awesome. Sounds like something I would do.

What a beautiful son you have and he is lucky to have you for a mom. I wish you both a drama-free Happy Happy New Year!!!

Hugggz,
Patty

First off I just want to tell you that your little man is very adorable. I am sorry that your relationship didn't work out, and I hope your New Year is bright.

Nancy, girl I am so sorry this happened, you deserve soooo much better. However, I totally commend you for getting rid of the jerk, you go girl! :thumbsup: Oh and I have to agree with jftazzy102, the bleaching and cutting up bit was awesome!! :D

Your son is adorable!! Have a Happy New Year! The possibilities for the new year are endless, and I know you will find someone who is SO much more worthy of your love. Hugs, girl!!

~Cel

Aww Nancy!!! I am glad you are happy now! Girl no man is worth an ounce of your un-happiness!!

Take Care!!

:grouphug:

Gosh, Nancy (((hugs))) this is crazy I so can't believe this has happen! Thats messed up gurl, whatever ya did right to pack all his sh&t up and kepted on looking ahead and not looking back. Ya deserve so much better and right now all that matters is that lil man of yours! Good luck gurl and I am always here for ya gurl, PM me anytime!! Hugs Amber

I'm sorryto hear this Nancy :( You have the right attitude though he doesn't deserve you! Hang in there and continue being the strong woman you are for you and your beautiful boy!

You have a very handsome little boy and one day you will find a man who deserves you both and you will be happy. Stay strong and Happy New Year.

Hey Nancy!!!!!!!!!
you must have moved fast...all his clothes bleached and cut up..i hope you used gloves=}

i am sorry he turned out to be a creep!!!
maybe, he is using...

the best is yet to come!!!
i am in your area..you should pm me
francis

((((hugs)))))Nancy
I am sorry about you and him, just keep on knowing it's HIS loss. What comes around goes around and I wish you and that adorable little boy all the best that life has to offer!!

Blessings to you and yours. May 2005 bring all good things to you!

Nancy ~ I am so sorry that this happened. This is 100% his loss please know that. I know you are angry and hurt now and you have EVERY RIGHT to be. I know in time you will realize you have learned some valuable lessons here and the next man that comes into your life better come in straight forward cuz you will know the signs. If this is the kind of man Ricky is then he did you a favor, he saved you from a life of not knowing where you stand with him to being in a position to pursue a relationship down the road with someone more deserving. I wish you and your little one all the best. We're here for you. If you need me I'm only a PM away...

Much Love,
Patty

Patty took the words right out of my mouth. I just want to add that i didn't cry either. And yes, some i thought i didn't love him because of this fact. But I KNOW that i loved me some Daddy. Still do just really. I finally cried because it's good for me sometimes. I wasn't crying over him because he was weak. I cried because i was resisting change. But girl it is SO all good. I'm glad i dropped that weight before the New Year came in. I just met a guy who had his eye on me long ago but he knew my baby was on lock, soon to be released. Well, there's nothing stopping him now. :D And even though i'm a little sick, girl i feel renewed.

Girl you have balls let me tell you but you know that is a very STRONG WOMAN for you my hat goes off you good job. as the saying goes "OUT WITH THE OLD IN WITH THE NEW" you go girl :thumbsup: that is how you do it all at once not time to think about or feel sorry for him just get it done and over with :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Way to go!!!! I wouldn't have thought about bleaching the clothes......

Raise that baby and all will be okay with the world!

Im sorry this had to happen to you but I am glad you had the strength to let go. I just hope I dont have to go through this kinda bull cuz my husband will be coming home in 6 days.

i hope you have a good years

I just want to say, I experienced the same thing when my boyfriend came home the first time. I was miserable, and I can tell you are to. Life is too short to be miserable. If it is time to move on, than it's time to move on.

I do like that you had the guts to bleach and cut his clothes. I thought about it, but couldn't get up the nerve. You go girl!

i don't agree with the bleaching clothes stuff, but to each his own.

Oh Nancy I'm soo sorry this happened to ya too!! But girl, I super agree with Patty!!! :thumbsup: ANd I definitely commend ya for the bleaching!!! I love it! But stay strong hun! I know you are! And your son is soo adorable!!

Good luck and continue to be strong Nancy.

Stay strong and don't ever look back. You and your baby will be just fine.

oh Nancy I am sorry this happened. I think you did the right thing by letting him go. That took a lot of guts and strength to do what you did but you stood up for yourself. God Bless you girl and I pray you find real happiness. Your shorty is soo cute. :D

I am so sorry to hear this Nancy. It is hard to believe that a man could be so dang selfish. A woman in waiting is very special. Take what you have learned and moved on. Nuture your inner woman and someday you will find a man who will appreciate you. That is what you deserve. Hang in there. Love ya Angie

"i don't agree with the bleaching clothes stuff, but to each his own." MissOne

I'm with you on that MissOne because it was my money that bought the clothing and the infamous religious piece (cross and chain). So what I did when mine came home the first time was give it all away. You'd of figured he'd of learned, but I guess because his money didn't pay for the clothing, giving his clothing and jewelry away did absolutely nuthin.

************

to Nancy -- Mommi, girl, I know you was flamin mad when you wrote that -- red ink, all caps, cussin when you know it's against the rules.
:angry:
You sounded like hot fire but I got cold chills from reading your piece because it's a very real part of this game. The unfortunate thing is is the type of thing us women don't find out about UNTIL after they get released. Then it's like we become dogmeat, like "thanks biatch for the visits and the packages and the Tims but now that I'm out -- I don't need you no more." I was just saying in another thread how when they get out one of the first things they want is the neighborhood scagwagwhore and in society, they go for what they want and they do what they want. It's enuf to make you wonder what his brains is made of.

Girl, he gonna miss you -- oh buddybud that man is gonna miss you like somethin terble!! Not now while he's out for he's livin the life of Riley right now and his mind is clouded by society's smog. It's when he's out of the society mix and back in prison where their mind opens up and his thinking without the smog becomes clear again. He'll be like "damn, what the heck was I thinkin. I lost the bet thing that ever happened to me -- let me call her, try and get her because if someone else does, they're gonna have a damn good woman on their hands." And that's when your phone will ring and it will be his voice callin from the jail, and that's when the scagwag will be come "who? that biatch? she didn't mean nuthin to me!"

Seems he couldn't wait to get back on the wrong path after all the good stuff you tried to instill in him. I don't know you but I do know as a SistaGirl in this prison game that you put it on him good. That road he's on is shaped like a horseshoe and at the end of it is the governour's face waving a "thanks for comin back" hankie. I'm not wishing bad on him but I know the road he's on and it only points to him winding back where he came from.

You got rid of all the pictures and all the things he made you huh? I got rid of all my stuff too -- even the marriage pictures. Based on meeting the real him, I found all that jail stuff to be garbage talk so I threw it all in the garbage.

So what will you do when he calls you from the cell -- you'll cross that bridge when you get to it but know that PTO is here for you and that if you do take him back, that you will not be the only woman who believed the stuff her man called and told her after he returned after crappin on her. The support is here. Women who've done 3, 4, 5 bids with the same man -- some of us been where you are right now. Those of us on our 3,4,5 bid with the same man -- we took him back and that's because prison does something to a person. It's like the man will grab onto you and can't let go, and, the woman can't let go either. The man often does after release, but the woman has much trouble and that's because she truly believed it all to be the real deal. Prison is a mf'er, fa sho!

It's about support here and I support you so much that I wanna give you my phone number. If you don't have anyone to talk to, PM me and ask me for it, okay, and that's because I know it hurts, I know sometimes you wanna to talk to someone and bleed your heart out with tears, yet, if there's no one, then who can you call. I just wanted to say if you ask, I'll say yes, I'll say yes Nancy I'll call you because when support is real, support is good and Mommi I know you are hurting bad right now.

THANK YOU LADIES FOR ALL THE SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGEMENT THAT YOU HAVE GAVE ME. AS FAR AS ME PAYING FOR THE CLOTHES I MESSED UP WELL THAT WOULD BE JUST DUMB IF I JUST CUT UP ALL THAT MONEY BUT SINCE I DIDN'T PAY FOR IT I DIDN'T CARE. I AM REALLY GETTING OVER HIM AND EVERYTHING HE PUT ME THROUGH BECAUSE HE TAUGHT ME A VALUABLE LESSON ABOUT MYSELF, THAT NO MATTER HOW BAD SOMEONE TREATS YOU, IT'S YOU WHO TREATS YOURSELF EVEN WORST IF YOU STAY AND DWELL ON SOMETHING THAT WASN'T MEANT FOR YOU. SO I HAVE LET HIM GO FOREVER, IF AND WHEN HE GETS LOCKED UP AND HE WRITES OR CALLS I WILL NOT ACCEPT OR WRITE BACK, THOSE CALLS WILL BE BLOCKED, AND THE LETTERS WILL BE RETURNED TO SENDER. THERE'S NOTHING IN THIS LIFE TIME THAT CAN MAKE ME GO BACK TO HIM AND HAVE HIM TREAT ME THE SAME WAY. HE WANTED HIS STUPID H*E HE GOT HER, NOW HE'S ON THE STREETS, ON THOSE DRUGS AND THE GIRL THAT HE LEFT ME FOR DON'T EVEN HAVE A PLACE TO STAY, AND THE ONLY ONE THAT IS SUFFERING HERE IS HIS SON, AND WITH TIME THAT LITTLE BOY WILL BE MY REVENGE, WHEN TURNS AROUND A FEW YEARS FROM NOW AND ASKS BOTH OF HIS PARENTS "WHY WEREN'T YOU THERE FOR ME" THAT IS WHEN THEY WON'T HAVE A WORD TO SAY TO THEIR SON, AND MIGHT AS WELL FORGET ABOUT HIM, BECASUE JUST LIKE THEY ABONDONED HIM WHEN HE NEEDED THEM HE'LL TURN HIS BACK ON THEM! IT'S SOUNDS MEAN BUT I AM A SINGLE MOM AND IF MY SON NEEDS ME I AM THERE, NOTHING CAN EVER BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN MY SON, NOTHING!!!

I'm just now seeing this thread. OUCH! I hope you are feeling even better about your decision since time is passing and you can be objective. The bleach made me smile, but like Missone I am older and been around the block a few times. I know you were venting your hurt but destruction generally turns out to be something that feels good now but you regret later. I am also glad she refused your offer of a fight. In retrospect, you know neither of them were worth your losing your dignity, let alone the risk of injury or getting arrested. Just think of the role model you want to be for your beautiful son. I have no doubt you'll be hearin from Ricky again one day. He sounds typical of dependent, immature guys who go for what looks like the best deal at the time. When he was forced to be straight, he could see it was you. Given the chance to party again, he sleazed right out. He may grow up one day, but you and Ralphy certainly don't need his crap in the meantime. Stay strong.

I am also so sorry about this. I really don't have any words to say. GOOD LUCK!! I know because of how strong and wonderful you are, you will move on; Rafael has a strong mama!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU!!

Well Ladies after everything I went through with this Dumb A** his friends are constatly calling my house asking for him. They say he is M*I*A I keep telling them there is no way I would let him back into my house and therefore to stop calling for him. They have been calling for the past 4 days, I tell them the same thing, over and over, and then yesterday his cousin called me and told me that he knew that Ricky was at my house, I told him Look he messed up not me, I kicked him out of my house for a reason and now you "Know" that he's here, I told him put it this way I would much sooner call the cops than to let him in my home again. There's no way in this life or the next I would ever get back with him, I hope that nothing has happened to him but face it he is back to his old ways which means he's getting high running around with stupid little hood rats and once he's out of drugs he'll pop up somewhere. He got offended but in all reality I don't want nothing to do with him and I am trying to live a better life because of that, and for them to keep calling and asking for him to my house just bothers me so I think if they keep calling by end of this week starting next week Iam changing my phone number. So I just wanted to give you the drama that has been going on in my life. So take care everyone.

Well Nancy keep staying strong girl! You are doing a great job. You have the right attitude. Change that number!! I am so proud of you for staying strong. Don't let him get you down. Take care of that Angel of yours like you are. Keep him #1 priority in your life. Good luck to you!

Salena

Thank you Salena for your kind words, and just to let you know there is no man in the world worth me or my son being unhappy. This year is a brand new year with a brand new start, so it's just pushing forward without looking back. I have to thank God that he has gave me that stregth to walk away and not return. Each day that we have life is a good day and it's another day that God has let us enjoy our children and family. I whish you and your family the best and all the hapiness in the world. I know that this year will be a good year! :)

Good for you, Nancy! it's interesting that all his friends are sure he's with you- that must mean he is NOT with the other girl, or they wouldn't be making that assumption! I also hope he is O.K.- all we really want for them in the end is to see the light and stop the chain of bad behaviors. Some of them do, but it sure does take lots of time and tears before it happens.

Don't even wait. Change your number. They won't stop calling. Maybe they'll all think you moved too if you change your number. Good luck and you should be *so* proud of yourself for being so strong.

girl, i am so sorry that you have to go through this. you dont need that type of stress in your life anyway. cause the samething he did to you, he will do it to her!! so dont even sweat it. move on with your life, you deserve a whole lot better. good luck to you.

OMG girlie I can't imagine how upset you are I hope you don't look back you are better than than I hope thing's get better Keep your head up girl

Im sorry you are going through this. Time heals all wounds. I stoped loving my "friend" when i found out what he was really about. Take care of your baby. Thats what im doing now. The time & money i wasted with him is lost but now i spend all that with my son. Kids help us through the toughest times in our lives.

Wow, I know I'm late, but I'm sorry to hear about this. I knew things would come to this however after (just) seeing and responding to your would you transfer the line post. However because being too real on the site could get you in trouble, I didn't want to risk getting attacked by the other members who all agreed in support.

Hopefully the future of the site allows members to be supportive in every sense of the word instead of only to the positive because in real life in the real world, everything is not all positive and all good. Real life is comprised of negative and positive, good and bad. Supporting your friend means being real about matters, even if it hurts. Let's say your girlfriend is dressed for an interview and knows she looks good. Would you agree with her because that's what she wants to hear, or would you tell her "your skirt rises in the back and your shirt is a little wrinkled." Get my point?

I feel your pain. Girls like her always come out on top, hence "good guys/girls come in last" -- it's true. I always feel the better you treat a man the harder he'll kick you in the but and the worse you do him the better he'll love you. That just seems to be how relationships are and it's something I'll never figure out.

Again, I am so sorry. Just learn what you can from your experience because that's where the real value is in all of this -- in the baggage that you leave behind and the lessons learned you take forward.

I agree with the post above about keeping it real.

Sorry you had to go through this sweety,
gotta give you some props on what you did to his clothes lol

for all the bad something good comes in return ma, just remember that!