New week~New Chapter.....

Scary is furious with me.....

To start off yesterday before I left for Scary called me upstairs, and looked as if he had seen a ghost. Not to gross y'all out but he has a gastric bleed and it's bad. It's about the similarity of a woman's time of the month....

Well needless to say I made him promise me when I came home from work he would let me take him to the doc's/ER, to get checked out. Well I made all the arrangements, my daughter was being watched by my mom, my son was being watched by Scary's step mom.....

Well, when I came home...#1 my house looked as if it were robbed(messy messy), #2 my son was not there when scary's step mom came to pick him up(so he was home) #3 Scary told me there was no way he was going to the ER..., that after the day he had with the kids, he was stressed out and he was going out...

I was FURIOUS! first off something's wrong with him, and he doesn't have enough energy to wait in the ER's waiting room, yet he can take a shower and go out with his friends....Well I let him have it... I told him he was selfish, and he has no grip on priorities!
We argued the entire time he was getting dressed, he told me if I didn't stop he was not coming home at all....
A**HOLE!!!!
So I did what every woman would do that has been burnt in the past, I followed him...He didn't do anything wrong, but I finally caught up to him where I let him know that he was being followed by me, and while I was talking to him angrily on the corner, who happens to drive by...:angry: :angry: :angry: the psycho stalker, she then called the cell phone to find out why we were on the corner talking....well I gripped that phone up faster then you could say AT&T, and I let her have it, I spit so much sh*t at her I can't even remember what I said, but I can tell you right now it wasn't G rated.

Anyhow I left and by the time I got home he was there, he was quiet and said he was so mad at himself for coming home to me, and that if I didn't chill, he was going to move to his mom's after the 1st of the year.

He then went back out, and came in after I was asleep, he was totally smashed out drunk, and told me not to bring up a word of the argument, I told him if he was going to follow the same path as before it didn't matter to me if he left...

Don't get me wrong, I am not excusing what he said or did, he is an A** and I am so Pi**ed at him right now, but I wish I wouldn't of stooped to that level of of arguing....I am so mad at myself right now...

Sometimes it is hard not to argue like that. I probably would have done the same thing. In fact I know I would. I know I am changing, but you not what scarysgirl, we didn't become this way over night and in time everything will change. Just know that it is okay. We all have days we want to forget. Just know we are here for you.

You have put up with a lot and been very patient. I think you had every right to be upset and do what you did. I know you are hating yourself for arguing, but there comes a point where a person cannot take anymore. I think you should calmly try to talk to him about it. Don't argue.....just talk. You are concerned about his health and that is perfectly fine. We are here for you. And remember we weren't made this defensive originally, the way things have gone in the past (with our men) made us this way. You give him a lot of trust and support and I think you have every right to be as mad as you are.

Wendy~ I have to agree with AEMS. You should not be mad at yourself for going off. I would have done the exact same thing as you. Girl take a deep breath and try talking with him. I know things will work out for you. Every healthy relationship goes through their battles. This is just a little bump in the road for the two of you to go through. I know all will work out for you.

((((hugs))))
Salena

Few of us could say we would have controlled our anger put in the same set of circumstances as you are. Don't be so hard on yourself. After all you're the one that made all the arrangements for the children so you could take care of his medical problem. He needs to recognize where his priorities lie and deal.

Best of luck to you,
Patty

Thank you as always for all your support. I know I was right, I just hate when I spaz like that.
I already talked to him once today, he started off by telling me he hated me, by the time we were done he was softened about 30%. Hopefully we'll talk it out tonight....

What would I do without you guys...............................

Just keep communicating!! You seemed to have worked out your other problems by talking so hopefully this will work out also.

Sorry to hear of your troubles ... I wonder what you mean by gastric bleed, is that an ulcer in his stomach that's bleeding? And he looks like he's seen a ghost because he's loosing blood? He could be afraid of going to the hospital or dr. some folks have a fear of this but have a hard time putting it into words. Does he have to go to the hospital because of insurance reasons? I wonder if you timed it right, when fewest other patients are around - if he'd go then. When he may not have to wait so long to see the dr. Maybe that's part of the problem. Emergency rooms can be killer to sit and wait I've done my share in the past. But recently I had to go cause I cut my hand, it was early in the morning and there was no wait. Best of luck to you and I hope he gets to the dr. soon.

I'm sorry to hear this but don't be hard on yourself many of us would have done the same thing believe me! I hope things improve for you two!!

Sorry to hear of your troubles ... I wonder what you mean by gastric bleed, is that an ulcer in his stomach that's bleeding? And he looks like he's seen a ghost because he's loosing blood? He could be afraid of going to the hospital or dr. some folks have a fear of this but have a hard time putting it into words. Does he have to go to the hospital because of insurance reasons? I wonder if you timed it right, when fewest other patients are around - if he'd go then. When he may not have to wait so long to see the dr. Maybe that's part of the problem. Emergency rooms can be killer to sit and wait I've done my share in the past. But recently I had to go cause I cut my hand, it was early in the morning and there was no wait. Best of luck to you and I hope he gets to the dr. soon.


I was trying to be not so graphic by listing it as a gastric bleed...we don't know what it's from...but basically it looks as if he is shi**ing blood clots.....O know gross, tell me about it! But it is very scary to me(no pun intended), it could be anything fom an ulcer to stomach cancer. I think he is afraid of what it might be. This isn't the first time it's happened but it's worse then ever, the last time it happened he was in jail, they took him to the hospital, checked him for hemmroids, when he didn't have them, they said he was fine and released him, no tests no nothing. And yes it is for insurance reasons for going directly to the ER. He is on a waiting list fo an insurace program. He's only working for his dad part time, and due to our income size he is not eligible for public assistance.
Thank you for your concern~

Just wanted to let you's guys know that Scary, although still has not let me take him to the hosptial, is doing OK.
We made a commitment to one another last night that we will both stop making harsh decisions when we are mad.
He's back to himself today YIPEE!!!

Very wise on both sides:) he should still get a checkup. Some things are scary even to Scary people.
(I'm sorry, I've just always loved your nicknames because you're so nice)