View Full Version : I am upset over something that happened with him

12-23-2004, 10:08 AM
well i had it all planned to go see my husband today and stay over night. well my heater died. well i diddn't go. the heater repair people are comming. well my husband call and had a freaking cow ,kittens and puppies.
he told me to get up hear now. oh he acts like it's no big deal. he called me every name under the book. he even wants a diviorce.

i know he was looking foward to this, i feel bad. i said i'll go tomorrow, he said don't bother. not to make an excuse for myself but i see him every 2 weeks

i'm so uupset about this. have any of you had an issue like this

12-23-2004, 01:28 PM
i understand how he could get soo upset,but at the same time you have to do what you have to do , to keep the house undercontrol, and if you see him every two weeks he should at least be thankful for that how long has he been in? im sorry to hear that times are tough, just hold on!!

12-23-2004, 01:30 PM
*HE*, not you, needs to take a huge deep breath and calm down. You did nothing wrong.

12-23-2004, 02:24 PM
Could there be a little holiday depression on his side? He is definitely the one needs a chill pill. I bet he is already regretting himself or would be soon. Sometimes things beyond our control come up.

12-23-2004, 06:36 PM
you gotta do what is right for you, and your having a home is most important. I was in his shoes, i never acted like that, but i do understand his probably frustration. As well as the let down from the anticipation. Take them deep breaths and know that you had to do what was right, and that you will see him soon. Hopefully he will not only get over it but possibly avail himself of finding a better way to deal with disappointment while he is in there, becasue life is full of them. Certainly lashing out at you in anger and frustration does neither of you any good nor does it make things better for the future. Happy Holidays

12-23-2004, 06:45 PM
He definately needs to calm down. Yes, the holidays are rough on them and us but that is no excuse. If my man ever said he wanted a divorce over something like that he would probably get one! You don't deserve that!

12-23-2004, 06:50 PM
Peace...No, my Beloved has never uttered those words or anything similiar. Suspect, that your hubby was angry and feeling some-kind-of-way...that does not excuse his language and disrepect. You did the best you could...we usually do...make a way of of no way. He needs to calm down and he owes you an apolgy. Once, I missed a planned visit...became sick while on the bus to prison. My Beloved was finally able to talk with me when I arrived home the next day. He was more worried that something happened to me. We, who sit outside of prison, can only imagine how valued the visits are and hpw anxious our loved ones become waiting (we do, too) for the visits. I hope your loved one learns from this and that you let him know exactly how you felt. Blessings....

12-23-2004, 09:40 PM
I agree with everyone, you did what you have to do. Sometimes I think they forget about the word responsabilities. He was upset, and I can understand that, but he really didn't need to act that way. Maybe he needs to avail himself to those anger management classes. He needs to get a grip on his feelings.

12-23-2004, 10:05 PM
I agree with the advice given here, no one needs to be put down or disrespected, so tell him to be kind to you, and you demand it from him too. This goes two ways, whether he likes it or not, you have needs too!

Sometimes they just don't get what everyday life is like while they are gone and it is our job to tell them what it's like, and they should be looking out for us too, caring about our bills, and our hearts too! The Holidays are hard on all of us! Not just our hunnies inside. I can understand his anger and frustration this time of year, but - Heck, I have some of my own, so let's try to just be there for eachother, and loving to eachother....Because for some of us, this is all we've got!

..This is just how I feel.