I was not sure where this goes. Sorry if it is in the wrong place. A freind of mine shared this with a group and i thought i would share it with you.

As I write you, I sit in a tower watching and waiting above one of the largest prisons in the state of Alabama.
As I was sitting, I felt a need to write a letter to tell parents and young adult some of the things that I do and see every day in my chosen profession, as a correctional officer.

I see many sorrows, few real honest smiles and less joy. The sorrows come by many things; one person may have missed an approved visit that he may have worked hard to get. The reason may have been that the inmate broke a rule and the visit was denied or postponed as a punishment, or "his people" didn't come for some reason, or no reason at all.

Many sorrows come by a death in the family or perhaps an illness, and the inmate cannot get in touch with anyone to find out what has happened, or what is being done about the situation. I have heard an inmate not much older than myself, preparing funeral arrangements for one of his parents from prison. I caught myself trying to grasp how he must have felt, and I could not imagine the pain or sorrow. Many times the only thing that they can do is to sit and wait, for hours- sometimes days. I have watched grown men break down and cry from frustration over things you and I don't ever stop to think about, such as a busy signal on a telephone.

Many of us consider no mail as a blessing, sometimes; however, many inmates consider "junk mail" as a blessing because it was sent to them alone. Many receive no mail at all, ever. Some inmates don't know where their family is, or how to contact them, sons, daughters, wives or grandchildren. No one.

Some people will carry a sorrow to their grave, because they will never see "the other side of the fence" as long as they live. Some make the best of the situation. Can you pause for a moment to think what it would be like to never watch TV alone again, or be able to watch what you wanted, or never go fishing or hunting-to hear the sound of the fall leaves rustle under you feet as you walk through the woods with you girl or your wife? If that doesn't shake you, then how about never being able to hold your husband or wife when ever you want to, to pull them close to you and tell them that you love them, never being able to share their company again, or to make love again, as long as you both shall live. You won't be able to enjoy the children as you should, or be able to watch them grow up, to watch him play football, or to watch her go out on her first date, and to wait up until she is safely home. You won't be able to see your grand children grow up, after your children get married, at the wedding you missed, because you were sitting in prison serving a sentence of "life without parole" or will sit somewhere on death row. Where some people fearing, some praying for their time to come, for the execution of their sentence.

Many of us work in a noisy environment-we will stand the pressures and the stresses of the day, to race home for the comfort of our home and to see our wife and children, waiting with open arms to greet us when we arrive.

Imagine living in an environment where the noise seldom stops and the frustrations always runs high and you have very little, in any, choice in what you eat, wear, do or go. You do the same thing day in, and day out, day after day, year after year, with little change. With no one to turn to or no one to lean on, in a place where friends are near non existent and close relationships are even more rare. Debts can cost you all that you have to you name, it can cost you your body, even your life.

My fellow officers and I come to work each day and see the toll it takes on a man to be placed behind a fence and bars, to be stripped of the most private and personal act of being a human being, such as openly caring for someone, or to cry in front of other people, because it may be taken as a weakness. You and I take our freedom for granted. I can promise you that an inmate will treasure the few moments that they get to spend on an eight hour pass with their wife and children. That is the very few inmates that are allowed to take advantage of this privilege.

Many inmates have only a letter or a postcard to hold on to, to keep them going. I have sat for hours and talked with men and their problems, such as their wife has left them, and she has custody of the children, or their parole officer is delaying a parole over a simple matter such as paper work, or a medical examination. Or the officer didn't get to it, he was on two weeks of vacation.

I have sat and looked at pictures of families, a wife, of children and pets and many other things. I have heard stories and the tales about the people in the pictures and have felt compassion for the both of them. I have even cried and prayed for these men when I was alone by my self.

I have often wondered if I had the right to shoot someone that would attempt to escape. With in my reach I have a 12 gage shotgun loaded with .00 buckshot. If the need were to arise that I should have to use it, well, it would certainly maim or kill. I have found an answer. It is in my bible. It tells me that I ma to obey all authority: the State of Alabama is my authority. It tells me that I am to stop an inmate if he attempts to escape, to use the force necessary to accomplish this, which includes deadly force. If it weren't for God's approval the government wouldn't exist.

My job is hard. I must see the sorrows and fears of these men and have compassion as a Christian. As an officer, I must at times do things which seem to show little or no mercy.

Parents and young adults, please listen to what I have to tell you. Teach your children well, to do what is right, teach them how to tell the difference between right and wrong. Teach them that is never too late to come back to our living savior, but most of all teach them how to serve him day to day. Because if you don't, well, I have told you some of the things that I see and witness each day that I walk through a gate , for my Lord and state.

I will leave you with this bible verse; it goes,

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he shall not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:7

Lulu, I think I had read that before from Joey's mom. If it wasn't the same thing then it was really similar to this one also. Wow it just shows how the guards are sometimes human. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Cherrie from tx

yes,lol i did not realize that is was already posted. :) sorry

Lulu,
I hadn't read it before. I can't imagine what an inmate must go through. I pray for compassionate COs around my son-n-law. Thanks for sharing that there really are some.

Betsy

You are welcome. It touched my heart when i read it. The little faith i do have in the system, reading something like this does give me some hope that there is some Co's that care.

I wonder how many other officers feel the same? Although I know that there are probably quite a few, I have begun to belive the majority live with the "well you shouldn't have come to jail" mentality.

I guess some just have a heart and dont guess some want to amit it.

That was very interesting. I know there are a few Co's where Kraig is at, that are really good to us. I really cant complain to much about them.

In all the years, & in all the prisons, I have run across a few CO's in each place that actually care about the prisoners. In my experiance it's ussually an old school CO who has seen it all, & over the years has had the time to really look at what is going on, & has come to terms with it. They also have seniority, & experiance, & are comfortable in showing some kind of compassion for prisoners. -----------Ken

Where kenneth is at, there is a few there that is pretty cool. but there is also some there that is hatful as well. Some times that scares me to death

WOW!!!!!! LULU......I SEE BY YOUR COUNTER KENNETH ONLY HAS 11 DAYS LEFT........I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey Ken... I'd have to agree. It seems like it's the younger, newer co's that have the biggest chip on their shoulders.

(thanks for posting this, I found it moving)

Jodygirl

Hi Sherron, :( That date as of now is not correct. They messed up on Kennths time or something. Now he wont b e out till the 20th of feb. I am waiting on Kenneth now to get back to me so we can figure out what is going on. I been calling that number that number to see what has changed, or if they moved his date more. well it says that the system is down. what a mess.

but thank you

Thanks Lulu, great letter! And Congrats on the homecoming...it will be soon!!!

thank you kb, We are pretty excited as well. :)

I knew there were guys like this out there. It's reassuring, isn't it? -- to say the least.

It is actually Linda. It really touched me

Hi there,

I also was a c/o. That is where I met my husband and I'm glad to see that not everyone thinks bad of c/o's. I tried to be a nice and considerate one and treated them with respect. I felt that they had already been judged and it wasn't my place to do it again. I just joined this group and wow! What a nice post to read right off the bat!! Thank you,

Michelle

Refreshing to hear another kind CO voice (present or former). We hear way too much of the opposite and it's always so nice to hear of, or from, those who were considerate. Welcome to PTO, Michelle, we're glad to have you here. :)

Lys

Lysbeth, This letter really had brought tears to my eyes. It is wonderful to hear some god news at times.

Shades, If i have not said so already, welcome to PTO family. :)

Shades,

I have been to a few different prisons, & done my share of time, & I have met some really good CO's. When I first started doing time, I thought of them all as the same, & then realized I was doing what I was criticizing them for doing. Over time I came into contact with some CO's that really broke my predjudice of them. I have seen CO"s come to the help & aid of prisoners & go out of their way to do so, & set themselves up for criticisim from their co-workers for doing so, but all that was overoad byu their sense of right & wrong, of basic human decency. It would renew my faith in humanity. That all was not lost.-----------Ken

I just read the post for the first time and can only say how very true the words/feelings are for some CO's. Not all CO' lack the ability to be human...to be a person with offenders; some even find the ability to grow themselves as a person. You know, I have always hated the word "inmate", I think it is a representation of the inpersonalization that is taught and expected of CO's. Its a way of categorizing a person to be seen less than another...it was a word I refused to use when I was in the field and I think as a person, I grew a little more from it, if you can understand what I mean.

Chris

[QUOTE]In all the years, & in all the prisons, I have run across a few CO's in each place that actually care about the prisoners. In my experiance it's ussually an old school CO who has seen it all, & over the years has had the time to really look at what is going on, & has come to terms with it. They also have seniority, & experiance, & are comfortable in showing some kind of compassion for prisoners. -----------Ken[QUOTE]

The relationship between the prisoner and the older officer is different, there is a mutual respect that is formed. Officers with years of service spend a lot of their lives behind the walls with them.We get to know them, we get to know their families, we see their frustrations the sorrow and the anger , we are constantly torn between compassion and that what others within the service expect.

We become more flexible and understanding and do what we can. For me the turning point was one event on a visit day many years ago a mother and two children, The sadness in the mothers eyes the children in need of new clothes and shoes I began to think of their lives the hardship they were suffering , I saw the happiness in their eyes when the husband ,the father walked into the room, but most of all when it came time to end the visit and I proceeded to escort him from the room, a little girl with tears streaming down her face, eyes full of hate and her cries of "don't take my daddy away , I hate you , I hate you"!!!

I went away from work that day and the questions began to arise within me , I asked myself "What am I doing, is this what I have become", and to this day the vision of that little girls face has been with me it something that I cannot forget and is a constant reminder of what families go through when someone goes to prison.

To leave the service was not the answer either because to me it was the easy way out , I would be betraying the trust and respect of the prisoners I have known for many years , who will be there for them, who can they talk to openly and honestly how could they trust again.

Thanks for that post. Yes, there are CO's that have compassion for inmates. We are all human whether in or out of prison. Thanks to all of the CO's who have found the love of God in their hearts to treat inmates as human beings!!!

I have had a couple of very decent conversations with some of the COs. The brighter ones seem to figure out that the system is as imperfect as its clients on some level:)

I think more co's have compassion that what they are given credit for. As he stated inmates cannot cry becasue they are taken as week, well so would a co. For the most part i would have to say the co's at the prisons i have visited have been pretty good and than there are the ones you just wanna slap. Funny thing is it's usually the females tht are so rude not the males. I am glad to see the care abou8t the inmates and it breaks my ehart to think of an inmate never receiving mail or the families disowning them.

I think this letter should be posted, maybe even stickied...it something to remind us on what are loved ones go thru every day ( i know my guy does what he can to hide the cold brutal facts from me)

Also to reimind us that CO's are human too...We are very fortunate. Most of the CO's that my sweetie deals with are totally real. And just like everything else. stereotyping is not the answer.

thanks for posting this...I have been a member for a year and some and had never seen this...

I work at a teen homeless shelter and I have just interviewed my third former correctional officer who wants to prevent young people from experiencing the horrors they've witnessed. I know some have big hearts.

I just wanted to say that letter really touched my heart as i sit here replying back tears are rolling down my face everything in his letter is so true!!! Thanks for sharing that letter lulu!!!

babygirl,

your more then welcome. I sat here reading this again, and has brought tears to my eyes as it has the bery first time I read it.

wow, this is my 1st time reading this. So, so, true considering my sweetie is LWOP :( . Yes there are actually CO'S that care, but what got me was the part where he was describing the things that some of them will "never" get to do!
Thanks for sharing this.

I just read that for the first time also, and yes I started crying also, when I first started reading, it sounded just like I had wrote it. I am glad to know that there are more CO's out there that think and have thought like me,I just wish there were more at the facility that I was at, so maybe things could start to change. I just couldn't do it alone. I also have to say thank you to the inmates, not just my Sgt. for showing me that they were human, had familys and feelings. I also thank, my capt, when I opened my mouth, for what I saw, he put me in the towers for about 2 months that is when I started thinking and watching everything that happens inside the walls, I have seen inmates cry and die behind the walls and some that are so old don't even remember why or how he got there so everyone please teach your children, I would never want to wish what I saw and had to do on anyone, Thanks to God that I am no longer there hopefully one day I can help out in other ways

The letter is touching until the paragraph where the CO says he or she would shoot someone that attempted to escape, in that it is complete BS that the answer to this situation is contained in the Bible! It is their interpretation of the Bible.

A person’s job or career is NOT their authority, it is their CHOSEN vocation and they are free to leave any time they see fit. Does the author follow their chosen ‘authority’ so doggedly that they would jump off a cliff if they were asked?

What person that does not have a fascination with annihilation would be doing a job laying in wait on a watchtower, ready at the drop of a hat with their finger on the trigger.

Interesting how people use religion to suit their own purposes (yeah I know it’s been going on since the beginning of time) but then wonder why they are often seen as so blatantly uninformed and uneducated to people of other creeds and cultures!!!!

If the problem of keeping people out of prison were only as simple as people doing what they were taught by their parents (assuming everybody’s parents taught them what is deemed to be the ‘right’ thing) by society. The author makes no consideration for the fact that human nature is what it is and people are going to do what they are going to do regardless of what they were taught a lifetime ago by parents of a prior generation.

that is why I left. I realized that all my life I helped people, and now I was at a job that was getting to me, to were I could care less if I took a life. I realized that I gave my 2 week notice

It's a little more complicated than a lot of you might think to be a caring and nice CO. I work as a Corrections Officer with the group that probably needs help the most, juveniles incarcerated at the state level.

First of all, there are a lot of people who would be caring and great to incarcerated inmates. 99% of them though would never do the job. Why? It's dangerous, low paying, and oftentimes unrewarding. Furthermore, the personality type that would probably benefit the inmates the most, would also be the one that would get picked on the most by the inmates. Where the inmates might want caring staff, they drive them away by being threatening to them and giving them ****. The inmates take kindness as weakness. The next time you see an Officer being aggressive verbally, remember that he probably didn't start off this way. Instead, this was molded in time because it's simply the most effective way he could find.

Another problem I've had with being emphatheic and nice is that sometimes it feels like I'm doing it in vain. The criminality is so deeply rooted in the kids I work with, there's nothing I can say to really change them. Where I work is a revolving door. Where's my motivation to put in everything I have when I see the kids I worked with and tried for months to change, come back on charges.

Finally, one big problem is that it's hard to be "happy" and satisfied working this job. It's not great. I still never fail to feel disgusted and suprised when I come back from a few days off, at the way these people act. I spend a good portion of my day being ridiculed, disobeyed, and disrespected. Do you think it's easy for me to go from this, to being an emphatic and caring CO? Hell no, it's practically impossible. I get put through mental torture all day, it's oftentimes near impossible to snap out of it and try to help.

Remember one thing. These "guards" that you see who act inhuman etc., are just putting on a facade. They go home, take off thier uniform, put on jeans and a tee shirt, and are perfectly normal. They sit down with thier family, laugh with thier children, and enjoy life. I'm not condoning prison guards abusing inmates verbally or otherwise. I"m just trying to get you all to understand that it's not easy at all to be nice. Oftentimes our coping mechanism for this *impossible* job is to harden up, pretend like we have no personality, and snap orders in an authoritative manner.

So, these are just my observations. I'm not a career corrections officer, instead I'm merely getting a taste of a profession that I've alwways being curious about. I'd like to think that I"ve helped some people along the way. I've had multiple kids confide in me and ask for my advise, and I think they considered me to be the type of person you all hope to find in CO's. On the flip side of that coin, there are kids who hate me and think i'm a strict asshole. Why? Because I had to stick to a policy, or deny them something they felt important. I guess it's all relative.

Prison is a pretty bad place to be. As an Officer or as an inmate. Thats all I can say. I'm looking forward to finishing up my year (I promised myself I'd try it for this long) and leaving it all behind. But, if I ever have to go in a prison again (as an inmate or visitor or whatever) and I see a "mean" CO, I'll understand why he is being this way, and I won't take it personally-thats what you all should do.

Niteowl, I realize that being a CO is an extremely multi-faceted and complex role, however I re-iterate my point that to be a CO is a person’s CHOSEN vocation. People are not forced into that or any other career, it’s a choice that is freely made, you said in your post that it is a career you have always been curious about.

Like attracts like, that is the fundamental law of the universe. If you spend a good portion of your day “being disobeyed, ridiculed and disrespected” that is because your own thoughts, motivations and darkness are being mirrored back at you. There is no other reason that a person chooses to work at a vocation in any surroundings, other than it is a reflection of what lies within.

“When you run into someone who is disagreeable to others, you may be sure he is uncomfortable with himself; the amount of pain we inflict upon others is directly proportional to the amount we feel within us." - Sydney J. Harris

Peace.....A powerful peice....thank you so much for sharing! Blessings...

I respectfully disagree with your second paragraph. My thoughts aren't dark and bad coming into this place. Usually I'm in a pretty decent mood. In fact, sometimes I'm in great moods. That being said, those moods are oftentimes shatterred quickly because of the negativity that comes at me, and exists in jail. When I'm in a great mood and talk to a kid, he doesn't reflect my great mood and get all happy himself. He already has so much going on in his head, that the truth of the matter is that he's probably not even paying too much attention to my mental state.

Furthermore, most CO's I work with are ridiculed and disrespected. Are you suggesting that they are all in a state of "darkness" when they come to work, and this is why they get treated this way?



Niteowl, I realize that being a CO is an extremely multi-faceted and complex role, however I re-iterate my point that to be a CO is a person’s CHOSEN vocation. People are not forced into that or any other career, it’s a choice that is freely made, you said in your post that it is a career you have always been curious about.

Like attracts like, that is the fundamental law of the universe. If you spend a good portion of your day “being disobeyed, ridiculed and disrespected” that is because your own thoughts, motivations and darkness are being mirrored back at you. There is no other reason that a person chooses to work at a vocation in any surroundings, other than it is a reflection of what lies within.

“When you run into someone who is disagreeable to others, you may be sure he is uncomfortable with himself; the amount of pain we inflict upon others is directly proportional to the amount we feel within us." - Sydney J. Harris

No I’m not suggesting that CO’s are in a state of darkness when they go to work. What I am saying is that our level of consciousness is being reflected back to us from our interactions with others, otherwise a person would not stay in a negative environment and would choose to do something else.

For example people who are cheery and upbeat gravitate to each other, on the other hand misery loves company and if it doesn’t find it will seek it.

If a person was not curious about darkness they would not choose to work in an environment that perpetuates darkness. You mention that most CO’s you work with are ridiculed and disrespected, which that implies that some are not, i.e. we gravitate to what we are, or put in another way, water seeks it’s own level.

I AM WRITING IN REGARDS TO THE PREVIOUS COMMENTARY ON CO'S ATTITUDES WHILE AT WORK.. I TOO AM A PREVIOUS TDCJ CO.. WRKING AT A UNIT FOR ALMOST 10 YRS AND ALSO HAD OPENED THAT UNIT TILL I QUIT DUE TO AN OFFENDER AND PERSONAL REASONS.. I USED TO THINK THAT I BELONGED THERE AS MUCH AS THEY DID.. I JUST NEVER GOT CAUGHT.. YOU HAVE TO HAVE A CERTAIN DEMEANOR TO BE ABLE TO GO TO WORK AND BE AROUND THESE TYPES OF INDIVIDUALS. IF NOT YOU BETTER HIT THE GATE QUICK.. YOU ARE WHAT YOU DO INSIDE THERE.. GIVE RESPECT TO GET RESPECT.. I DID WITH THE OLD ONES THAT KNEW HOW I DID MY JOB.. ALL I CAN SAY THE NEW BOOTS HAVE ALLOT TO LEARN AND NOT GET A QUICK CHIP ON THEIR SHOULDERS LIKE I HAVE ALSO SEEN.. ITS A GOOD JOB ..BUT IT IS ALSO WHAT YOU MAKE OF IT.. WOULD LOVE TO BE BACK IN THERE.. JUST NEED TO GET THE RANK AND A FEW CO'S IN LINE FIRST ... No I’m not suggesting that CO’s are in a state of darkness when they go to work. What I am saying is that our level of consciousness is being reflected back to us from our interactions with others, otherwise a person would not stay in a negative environment and would choose to do something else.

For example people who are cheery and upbeat gravitate to each other, on the other hand misery loves company and if it doesn’t find it will seek it.

If a person was not curious about darkness they would not choose to work in an environment that perpetuates darkness. You mention that most CO’s you work with are ridiculed and disrespected, which that implies that some are not, i.e. we gravitate to what we are, or put in another way, water seeks it’s own level.

when i was in another county jail the cos from booking all the way to my realse were nice. you give respect as an inmate you get it back.

Without the kindness of the CO's in Arizona, my husband and I would have lost many visits. When they had every right to ask me not to return, because of my being left stranded in the unit, on more than one occasion and unable to follow the rules to the letter, they have done all, within thier power, to assure we did not loose our time together. They are human, so they too have bad days. But, I have visited several units, in Texas as well and I have found the majority, give the respect that they recieve.

Unfortunately, the evils of the few haze the vision of those who are watching, all too often. Inhumanity is an ugly thing and my husband has faced it. I try to remember the words of one gaurd, who said he always treats the DR inmates with respect, because he knows the system makes too many mistakes and doesn't know who the innocent men are. I thank him and the others who understand and the inhumane I leave to God.

:) i've read the letter and the responses and they are all true. i am in florida and i have not seen any prison systems yet. on the other hand i have seen the way the county jail works and it is horrible. the co's treat the inmates like they are not people. one out of maybe five show compassion while the rest act like they have something to prove. in my opinion those co's are the one's who have had it hard in their lives and see a jod as a co as a way to have and abuse authority. they have no control of anything eles so the mistreat people when they are down. those co's are scum. i pray that more co's join that want to make a positive difference and that get respect by giving respect. there should be more of a process for someone to become a co. all i want is for my future husband to be treated well until he is back in my arms so i can continue to take care of my man.

the same way you say that verbally abusive co do not start off that way, the inmates serving time did not start of that way. many have to chang to adapt to their new enviornment. the difference is the co gets to go home and take off his uniform. the inmate, our loved one's do not.

I'v worked as an C.O...an they do expect u to be a hard,uncaring person...they said i was to nice to the inmates...for I too, believed in giving respect to get respect.I had more trouble from the male officers than I did the inmates.u always seem to have these "robo cops" who think the only way to do the job ,is to be very forceful...and the more u try to use force,the more rebellion u get...

yes some do have feelings and others are just mouths with no feelings...how sad it is.....angela :(

How nice that there's actually people that have been treated humanely by CO's. I personally have not come across one. Since I've had the pleasure of being introduced to the BOP I've been treated beyond belief.

I'm 51 years old. I'm an educated woman. I'm well dressed. I'm well versed. I walk into that prison every single time with a big smile on my face. I make a point to say good morning to the CO sitting there. I thank them for holding the door open for me as we walk into the visiting room. I do EVERYTHING I can to be respectful to these officers.

I've been treated horribly. My "good mornings" fall on deaf ears. They hardly acknowledge my presence. I've had the pen thrown at me when I went to sign in. I've had my keys thrown at me upon leaving. That's just the tip of the iceberg. I've witnessed this treatment to other visitors as well. They use intimidation. They try to strip every shed of human dignity away from those of us who have done nothing wrong.

If they treat me so disrespectfully, what are they doing to my man? What are they doing to your loved one? I would normally not stand for such treatment, however; I fear retaliation if I report them.

One of these outstanding officers was kind enough to snitch to the other inmates about his crime. That's not allowed. He added things that he didn't do to make it seem worse than it is. Now he's treated horribly by the other inmates, as if their crimes of murder and rape are so much better! They make his life a living hell on a daily basis. Good job!

I work with the public every day and would NEVER think of treating someone the way I've been treated. I know the value of kindness and compassion when you're dealing with people. I see none of that from the CO's I've come into contact with.

No, you obviously DON'T always get what you give as one person posted. I did not walk into this situation with an attitude or disliking anyone. They worked very hard to make me feel this way.

I have days when I want to choke the crap out them, I'll admit it. And I have to sit back, take a breath, and figure out why a normally non-problematic inmate has suddenly lost his damn mind. And then when I pry a little deeper, it's almost always a result of something going on at home. A relative died and he can't go to the funeral. His child is ill and there's nothing he can do to help. He can't reach his wife and has been entertaining thoughts of her being with someone else. Guys that normally receive mail...if they go two days go without receipt of mail, I start to notice subtle mood changes. Or I can't get the normally jovial wardkeeper to buff the floors and he's suddenly fighting with people in the cafeteria over a piece of cake. Things like that...sometimes there's a deeper explanation, but there are some COs who really don't care about all of that and will make no effort to work with the inmates at all.

I felt horrible last weekend when our CRT went down, and some of the visitors had to be turned away because they were not on back-up visitor's lists. It was horrible. While doing security checks that Saturday, I'd seen the men getting all gussied up and getting ready for their visits. Got their best boots on and best-looking uniform, only to get to the control room and only be able to wave goodbye to their loved ones through glass.

It's very tricky, because I cannot counsel them. I can listen, but I can't listen for too long. I can be empathetic, but not show too much kindness in expression or emotion. As a mother myself, there's that nurturing part of me that wants to offer advice yet my tongue is tied.

But like someone said on this board, when it's all said and done, I get to leave all policy and procedure behind every night, throw on my jeans and t-shirts, and lead an otherwise normal-boring-girl life.

Thank You LuLu,
That was heart whelming and brought tears to my eyes beacuse I know it's true. Thats the hard part of the letter as it doesn't matter what prison it is there is nothing but heart break in them. Everyone has to act tuff and not let anyone see any weekness CO included as that is thier way of living and it truely breaks my heart. As a parent I tried to teach my boys right from wrong but as they grow they fallow how they want. It doesn't matter how you try to stop them the only thing left in the end is to stand by them and let them know they are loved no matter what! So many of my tears are for all that are incarcerated and many prayers for them. May God Bless them all.

The deparment of corection teaches the co's to treat all inmates as scum,
laires & anything else to degrade the inmates. I have been there & I have
seen it done. You will find maybe one out of ten co's that will treat a inmate
as a human. It seemed to me that most of the co's that I had contact with
abused their authority.

This goes to show that officers are human too

wow, that was a strong letter, enough to put me in tears, i am alsmost speechless, i actually thought that 99.999% of prison gaurds didnt care, or maybe this one is the only that does care. i can honestly say i couldnt be a prison gaurd, i would end up behind bars myself. i have a heart, and as we all know your heart can over power your thoughts at times. that was a great letter and has changed my views on some things. tahnk you for sharing it with us.

There are both good and bad people in all professions.

I have known several people both men and women who worked in SC as corrections officers. Right now I also know two who work as administrative personnel.

Not a single one of them is a very nice person. They all have lots of emotional issues and personal baggage. Four of them are very cocky and arrogant and are the type of person that I would not want to have to deal with on a day-to-day basis.

In my dealings with the DOC here in SC this seems to be the norm rather than the exception. I'm not saying that is a fact; just my experience.

I know a couple who are nice and try to treat you with respect when you go in for a visit. However, the majority treat you as if you are less than human. I truly don't understand this. I know I have no idea what their jobs are like, what they see and hear on a daily basis, however, I know we are deserve to be treated with kindness and respect until our behaviour shows otherwise. It is amazing to me that they can treat people the way they do. I'm not sure if it is arrogance or ignorance, maybe a little of both. You know the old saying, "A little bit of power...."I just have to pray for them, hoping one day their hearts will be changed. Until then, I continue to walk in with a smile and a "thank you", I never want to be perceived that my attitude is anywhere in the ballpark with their attitudes.

How touching that was to read what you wrote. After what Ive been through with my son, it makes me not have respect for officers but you took the time to show me another side. Some treat us as bad people when we go to visit our kids..family...its hard enough to see our loved ones that have made mistakes be behind bars and then to be treated as we are is horrible. thank you:)

Does it really say that in the bible? I was pretty amazed and moved until I read that part.

I wonder if some of the Nazi soldiers who manned the concentration camps felt the same way, yet continued to do their jobs. After all, the government was their authority also, and wouldn't have existed without God's approval.

This is the first time ive read this. It made me cry. :(

LU LU, Yes gurl thank u!!!! When I read that the first time I was in tears and I haven't been able to figure out where I once read it at. Thanks gurl!!!!!

~Bella~

Wow..this is so true..

It breaks my heart to imagine the love of my life having to go through this...But GOD is love & through GOD & Love we will get through this....

wow this letter was very straight forward and powerful and thanks for sharing

Wow... thank you so much for sharing that. I had an experience this weekend at visitation that made me really wonder how some CO's can live with themselves at the end of the day. This letter made me realize that just like prisoners can't show weakness, I guess neither can CO's. But it does make me feel a little better to know that not ALL of them are completely heartless, just like prisoners.

That was really touching, thanks for sharing that Lulu.

That was very touching, thanks for sharing lulu.

:cry: this letter is awesome... i am also a former correctional officer and now i have a husband in prison.... it is true that mailcall for a inmate is worth more to them than a million dollars. make sure you write your loved one in prison. what we see as not important is ten times more important to the person in prison. think what it would be like to not be able to wash your clothes in gain laundry detergent, or open your frig and take something out to eat, what if you couldnt smell a rose or take a bubble bath. the little things we take for granted or things people in prison would love to enjoy for a brief second. people do wrong and everyone should be punished but who should determine the punishment? some or never allowed to have a second chance. we all suffer the punishment.. i was sitting in visitation over the weekend and i began to cry, i looked around the room and it saddened me because some of the men there will never see there parents alive on the streets again and some will never see there children grow up.

lulu, Thanks For Sharing It Is A Very Touching Letter , Capitalx Welcome To Pto, Very Interesting Reply You HavE I WOULD LOVE TO RESPOND TO IT BUT, I KNOW THIS IS NOT THE RIGHT PLACE IN WHERE TO DO SO.

I have never read this before but was very interesting..altho all i have heard is negative about the guards in prison ...I always knew there are some like you that care and have to do their jobs at the same time...I must say you have a very hard job..and I igive you much credit for even being there doing what ur doing....(refering to the guards):thumbsup:

I fail to see how this works - the bible says ' thou shalt not kill ' !
Surely u canot ' have your cake and eat it' - am sure this guy is compassionate UNTIL it comes to his wages !"
We don't have guns in the UK and it works just fine

Lulu, this was really nice....I often wonder if the guards are human...i have only seen 2 examples of this humanity in our time inside. I say "OUR TIME" because I feel I have done time with Tony....

That was really nice to share with us.

Capital X
The simple fact is that prison is necessary. unfortunatlly this worl has people in it that are predators of other human beings, and the meek who you said you were for need to be protected from them. I work in a level IV institution in California and my fellow officers and I have to oversee and control a population of violent predators so we can not afford to be weak.
This does not mean we have to be inhuman it just means we have to be strong. As for posibly having to take a life in order to frotect life or prevent an escape this is something that I think about often. An escsaped inmate is one of the most dangerous of people the will do anything to "get away", there are plent of examples of escapees injuring and killing innocent people as well as law enforcment in thier escape or escape attempt. As far as an inmate that assoults staff or another inmate with a deadly weapon that speaks for itself. in both of these situations where I might have to use deadly force the conditions are not dictated by me only my response is, and though I fear someday I may have to take a human life in the performance of my duty I am prepared to do it to save innocent lives. As for me I niether need or want compassion from you because you are right I am not the meek but niether are most of the inmates they deserve basic human decancy and dignity but you might want to consider the real MEEK the victims of thier crimes.

I guess we have been lucky when it comes to the C/0's that my husband has dealt with. He has been in seven different correctional institutes that I can think of right off and usually there may be one officer if any that he would say was "on his high horse". I have had no complaints myself about anyone off them. Knock on wood..... and I hope I never have any reason to complain. I live in a small town so when my husband was incarcerated here it was alot better for us. Our Sheriff has family members of his own that have been incarcerated and understands the toll it takes on the family. I really think if any C/O has had to visit a family member behind bars it really puts things into prospective for them. I live on both sides of the fence. My husband is incarcerated, my aunt is one of the local investigators and my cousin is a local town cop. My cousin who is like a brother to me was not a cop before my husband went to jail and was great friends with my husband. He recently finished all of his training and come to take my son fishing because he had been gone for a while. He said this time "I will keep him straight" when he comes home. Hopefully I won't need his help but it's nice to know I have someone watching out for me just in case!

You as a C/O would understand why it really upsets me to see someone get 6 months for assaulting a police officer and my husband is pulling 70 months because he was a "METH" addict. An addict is only hurting their self physically (and their families mentally) but someone who assaults someone else who ever it may be is out to hurt someone physically and it will effect them mentally too.

Being that my fiance is in prison and has to deal with some bad c/o I am pretty much on the fence I mean you can be a good c/o with out being a jerk but in the same breath you are dealing with criminals they are in there because they didn't know how to act. I couldn't do it. And somebody has to and for those who know how to treat people and not judge them my hat is off to them. Not all C/O are bad and not all criminals are guilty!

I pray daily that there are good CO's where my fiance is located. I quess it takes a real man not to get the (big head) that Ive experienced dealing with all of this. It's really bad when you are treated as a convict and all you are doing is trying to stand by your loved one.

As a C.O., I must say, that the hardest time for me is when I work chow hall and see all the men, young and old, of all races together, waisting year after year, in the prison system. I just want to stand up and ask them what the hell are they thinking and imagine how much they could be capable of doing in society, for the good.

I cannot agree with this post any more. It is a waste to spend one's life doing things to be involved in the system. One tip to those "complaining" about "bad" CO's. Don't do anything in your life, or you have your loved ones do anything, to ever have to deal with a CO and then you will not have to complain about it. I know it sounds so obvious but that is really as simple as it can be.

I will say that I finally met a CO even before my son has made it to prison. This CO lives right next door to me and I never knew what she did. she talks about the same things that are mentioned here. she is a great lady with a Job that she hates especially the role she must play while at work.
They are tough, mean and heartless but what I have learned by just talking to her this weekend, not all CO'S are bad just trying to do their jobs. imagine the emtional roller coaster some must go through when watching those who are heartbroken and away from their loved ones or those who left children behind to serve their time. yes of course, I can't say all CO'S are this way but you know, there are co's who are loving and caring and CO'S who are real a$$ es because they think the title makes them tough. theythink they can treat another humam being in a bad way regardless of what they did or what crimes they have committed which I do not agree with. think about this for one monment, these people who treat our loved ones with abuse and hate live a very lonely and hateful life on the outside is why they take it out on others. what goes around comes around. their day will come and those who are kind will always be treated with kindness.

I too know that there are some co's that are human and treat our loved ones well. My son told me that some of them are truly good people and even wanted him to contact them when he got out, but something stopped him from doing that, he still thought that maybe they weren't for real for some reason

Speechless.

LuLu,

Well i can say that you are one of the few officers that probaly actually care. When I was 17 I got locked up for something my ex boyfriend had done and I got the blame of it. When i got sent to the womens prison alot of the officers gave me alot of problems because I was a wealthy child from the suburbs of Ann Arbor. They would say I was a spoiled brat and could of had anything i wanted but i chose to come to prison. I didn't choose to come to that place. They would treat me like i was the lowest of lowest. When really I had never been introuble until then.... Anyways im talking in circles. I just wanted to tell you that im sure the male prisoners enjoy you'r kindness. I can tell you that it means alot to them.


Lindsey

I have worked that side of the fence. I understand what this CO is talking about. I will say this, as a former CO - I was compassionate, I felt for the inmates, but by not being mean and angry towards them all the time, the facility walked me. If you're not tough towards the inmates, it's automatically assumed you are a currupt cop, bringing in dope, sleeping with the inmates, ect. It's a sad deal. I know many CO's that care, but most are afraid to show that... it's a job, a career. I pray for the inmates every day - that they come in contact with at least one compassionate CO that can put a smile on their face, or let them know someone cares. We, CO's, are not here to judge or punish - they have already been judged, and there punishment is being sent to prison - it's already been done. We're there to protect them, the outside, and ourselves. Too bad not ALL CO's thought that way!;)

my husband is in madison correctional institution in ohio and he has had some real winner co's but he says that for the most part, most are nice. one won't let them go to church thought, isn't rehabilation and correctional, chuch would help rehabilitate them but he refuses to let him go. then when I visit, one co is extremely nice to me, my husband and out 7 yr old son. my son loves him. he jokes with him and makes it a little better place to visit him. he's(co)going to retire and i'll say that i'll miss him a lot... some are human, some are not, i completely agree.... I guess they have a job to do and being nice to inmates may not be part of there job description.......

I realize that the OP was posted almost 4 years ago but I must say I was moved by it. I am a former CO and the compassion that I had for the inmates where I worked would have costed me my job. I did in fact fall in love with an inmate and I would not change that for anything in the world. I do know that where I worked there were few CO's that had any heart and I hated that. If you treat these guys like animals that is exactly how they will act. They are human and should be treated as such. Our job as a CO was not to punish the inmates but to make sure that they follow the rules. There punishment is being there. Stripped of their freedom. I really commend this officer that wrote this letter for having the courage to admit that he sees inmates as human beings.

Being in prison before, I can say there are some CO's that do care. More than I would of thought. But there are always those a**holes that treat you less than human.

nice letter sad though thank you for posting it.

Thank you Lulu for sharing that. What a compassionate CO. We need more of those around........Godly compassion mixed with wisdom.

i agree. i also agree what the one lady wrote about her being a co and the inmates because its true. as a former inmate it was nice to have nice male and female cos. it makes your time go better.

May god richly bless this Co...Proverbs 22:7 is my favorite Bible scripture also

lulu, that letter really touched my heart. I have a young son in prison ..will be there for many years. I have met a few guards like this one, and at the prison where my son is at , they usually are always pretty cool with me..and when i talk to my son, He rarely complaines about them. I will take that as Gods blessing to the situation. And for that ..and those who have earned the praise and gratitude, i feel blessed.

Bless u and your family hun hugggggggggggggggs,

LuLu,

Well i can say that you are one of the few officers that probaly actually care. When I was 17 I got locked up for something my ex boyfriend had done and I got the blame of it. When i got sent to the womens prison alot of the officers gave me alot of problems because I was a wealthy child from the suburbs of Ann Arbor. They would say I was a spoiled brat and could of had anything i wanted but i chose to come to prison. I didn't choose to come to that place. They would treat me like i was the lowest of lowest. When really I had never been introuble until then.... Anyways im talking in circles. I just wanted to tell you that im sure the male prisoners enjoy you'r kindness. I can tell you that it means alot to them.


Lindsey


Im not a co hun. A co wrote this and i just past is around

I think it very important that we each put ourselves in the position of the CO at work, and I must disagree with the previous statement that for all CO's, the job is a "choice", many CO's in my area are CO's because it's the only opportunity available in the small rural areas where texas builds it's prison units. In fact, I had friends all through my life that have worked as guards, being's that my family is from one of the isolated areas. So, that being said, here's my take on it.

Guard Mentality | Justified?
I've made several comments concerning "guard mentality" in other posts, specifically a post about how to survive in prison and remain "unbroken". In that post I made the statement that I took a "military discipline" approach when interacting with the guards. My approach of course, was one of perhaps a new military recruit in bootcamp answering to a drill sargeant.
I took this approach as a means for survival, much as I think a guard takes the approach of a military drill sargeant for interacting with inmates, as a means of survival.
Are there corrupt guards? Absolutely, just as there are corrupt people in all walks of life. It is however my opinion that the majority are not corrupt, merely doing what they feel necessary to ensure their survival. For them, this means being able to leave the job, on the job every day. To go home and be the husband/father that their family deserves. I can certainly understand the need that they feel for remaining in control on the job. After all, they are at risk just as much as anyone else inside the razorwire. Guards have been raped and murdered on the job, so can we really blame them for trying to maintain their psychological advantage through strict discipline and enforcement of the rules? As for those who abuse their position of authority and take part in the use of exessive and/or unecessary force...well, kharma I guess is a good word. What goes around, comes around.
Hate, animosity, resentment, they all eventually affect us negatively and in the end, aren't worth the energy we spend on them. I suppose the bottom line for me is, I harbor none of the above mentioned towards guards in general. Those who deserve forgiveness, should truly be far more worried about their forgiveness with the one that matters, and not be worried about my opinions. For those just doing their jobs, no hard feelings from me.
Just my two cents, anyone got change?
Peace, Dan

This story really touched me. my husband is due out in a little over five years.The facility hes at isnt so bad the cos are usually pretty nice. They do have ruff jobs and sometimes its hard to see that. God bless everyone! LULU thatnks for sharing this with us.

I was not sure where this goes. Sorry if it is in the wrong place. A freind of mine shared this with a group and i thought i would share it with you.

As I write you, I sit in a tower watching and waiting above one of the largest prisons in the state of Alabama.
As I was sitting, I felt a need to write a letter to tell parents and young adult some of the things that I do and see every day in my chosen profession, as a correctional officer.

I see many sorrows, few real honest smiles and less joy. The sorrows come by many things; one person may have missed an approved visit that he may have worked hard to get. The reason may have been that the inmate broke a rule and the visit was denied or postponed as a punishment, or "his people" didn't come for some reason, or no reason at all.

Many sorrows come by a death in the family or perhaps an illness, and the inmate cannot get in touch with anyone to find out what has happened, or what is being done about the situation. I have heard an inmate not much older than myself, preparing funeral arrangements for one of his parents from prison. I caught myself trying to grasp how he must have felt, and I could not imagine the pain or sorrow. Many times the only thing that they can do is to sit and wait, for hours- sometimes days. I have watched grown men break down and cry from frustration over things you and I don't ever stop to think about, such as a busy signal on a telephone.

Many of us consider no mail as a blessing, sometimes; however, many inmates consider "junk mail" as a blessing because it was sent to them alone. Many receive no mail at all, ever. Some inmates don't know where their family is, or how to contact them, sons, daughters, wives or grandchildren. No one.

Some people will carry a sorrow to their grave, because they will never see "the other side of the fence" as long as they live. Some make the best of the situation. Can you pause for a moment to think what it would be like to never watch TV alone again, or be able to watch what you wanted, or never go fishing or hunting-to hear the sound of the fall leaves rustle under you feet as you walk through the woods with you girl or your wife? If that doesn't shake you, then how about never being able to hold your husband or wife when ever you want to, to pull them close to you and tell them that you love them, never being able to share their company again, or to make love again, as long as you both shall live. You won't be able to enjoy the children as you should, or be able to watch them grow up, to watch him play football, or to watch her go out on her first date, and to wait up until she is safely home. You won't be able to see your grand children grow up, after your children get married, at the wedding you missed, because you were sitting in prison serving a sentence of "life without parole" or will sit somewhere on death row. Where some people fearing, some praying for their time to come, for the execution of their sentence.

Many of us work in a noisy environment-we will stand the pressures and the stresses of the day, to race home for the comfort of our home and to see our wife and children, waiting with open arms to greet us when we arrive.

Imagine living in an environment where the noise seldom stops and the frustrations always runs high and you have very little, in any, choice in what you eat, wear, do or go. You do the same thing day in, and day out, day after day, year after year, with little change. With no one to turn to or no one to lean on, in a place where friends are near non existent and close relationships are even more rare. Debts can cost you all that you have to you name, it can cost you your body, even your life.

My fellow officers and I come to work each day and see the toll it takes on a man to be placed behind a fence and bars, to be stripped of the most private and personal act of being a human being, such as openly caring for someone, or to cry in front of other people, because it may be taken as a weakness. You and I take our freedom for granted. I can promise you that an inmate will treasure the few moments that they get to spend on an eight hour pass with their wife and children. That is the very few inmates that are allowed to take advantage of this privilege.

Many inmates have only a letter or a postcard to hold on to, to keep them going. I have sat for hours and talked with men and their problems, such as their wife has left them, and she has custody of the children, or their parole officer is delaying a parole over a simple matter such as paper work, or a medical examination. Or the officer didn't get to it, he was on two weeks of vacation.

I have sat and looked at pictures of families, a wife, of children and pets and many other things. I have heard stories and the tales about the people in the pictures and have felt compassion for the both of them. I have even cried and prayed for these men when I was alone by my self.

I have often wondered if I had the right to shoot someone that would attempt to escape. With in my reach I have a 12 gage shotgun loaded with .00 buckshot. If the need were to arise that I should have to use it, well, it would certainly maim or kill. I have found an answer. It is in my bible. It tells me that I ma to obey all authority: the State of Alabama is my authority. It tells me that I am to stop an inmate if he attempts to escape, to use the force necessary to accomplish this, which includes deadly force. If it weren't for God's approval the government wouldn't exist.

My job is hard. I must see the sorrows and fears of these men and have compassion as a Christian. As an officer, I must at times do things which seem to show little or no mercy.

Parents and young adults, please listen to what I have to tell you. Teach your children well, to do what is right, teach them how to tell the difference between right and wrong. Teach them that is never too late to come back to our living savior, but most of all teach them how to serve him day to day. Because if you don't, well, I have told you some of the things that I see and witness each day that I walk through a gate , for my Lord and state.

I will leave you with this bible verse; it goes,

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he shall not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:7




It helps me to hear things like this, only to know that there are ppl who care in there about what these men face from day to day. I am in tears after reading that partially because I miss him so badly and partially because I know that some people will never have the opportunity to be with their loved ones again on the outside. Life really stinks and deals us sh**ty cards sometimes. My heart goes out to everyone here and thank you for this post.:)

Thank you for posting this!! I have never read it before til now and can not begin to understand how they feel but feel even more compassion for them! The guard is right we do take a lot of things in life for granted and dont realize that in a blink of an eye it could all be taken away but here are men and women who have went with out it for years! It really does make you think hard about your life compared to theirs! And I do feel a little sorry for some of the "good" guards that have such compassion like this man and wonder everyday how they can go through with it! Other guards however need to read this and jump on board!
Thanks again,
Ashley

That's a touching read and another perversion of Scripture. While the majority of Christianity feels that killing is forgiveable, it is certainly not necessarily supported.

That was a really good letter. and it is good to see that there ares ome that actually care. it was great !!!

the letter is well written, and i have found an officer or three in the vistors intake area of an oregon prison, SRCI, that are very warm and do not make you feel that you are at a prison. we are all human and they just seem to know that. respect is respect.....

i share alot of the same feelings as that CO...i work on a pod that is 120 Mexican National. I feel it takes a special CO to work on that pod because the language barrier is HORRIBLE.. its so frustrating for the inmate and CO. i know spanish i come from a hispanic family...its alot easier.. and they really respect that i speak spanish or try to..instead of writin them off becuase they dont speak english.

the Bible also says " if you do this unto the least of these you have done it unto me". Prisoners were in the thoughts of Christ.And they should be remembered by us also.

the Bible also says " if you do this unto the least of these you have done it unto me". Prisoners were in the thoughts of Christ.And they should be remembered by us also.

Amen!

I pray that our future son-in-law has a co such as this! I know that he loves the Lord and would love to have a co who did also!

43 days and counting!
Praise God!!!!!

I have found out that there are really some good co's. The co in our visiting room is great. He greats us when we come in and says "see you next time" when we leave. He talks to us like human beings and asks about how we are doing, and has even shared about himself. On the other hand a couple men at the front desk wont even say goodmorning, or have a good day, when I leave from a visit. I am treated like a murderer too. Have to share this becuz its so cute! Last visit when I waiting for my fiance to be brought over...they brought him in, and 2 co's came around the corner to see if he really did have a fiance. They gave him shit saying "yeah right its prolly your grandmother" They introduced themselves and waved with big smiles. My fiance even introduced one of them as his "prison bitch" I was like OMG you said that to a guard ...but they all laughed and it was all in fun. So that day I realized that they arent all bad. My uncle is also a co somewhere in Arkansas, and I know him well enough to know he can be hard core when he needs to be, but he is also compassionate with a heart. When my mom told him I was marrying a inmate and im sure she told him what he was in for all he said was be careful not to sneak stuff into the visiting room becuz of the trouble I would get into and asked when we got family visits. Little does he know in Iowa there are none! I know this was long just felt the need to share!

The piece was beautiful and very well written. No matter when it was first posted, it was a very touching piece.

That was a very touching letter Lulu. I often wonder how the guards judge us, when we the parents walk through those gates. Do they know that some people live in cycles. Even though we try to escape them, they come around again. As parents there are ones that believe that they did everything in their power to try to raise our children right. However, there are some of us that believe that if we could have done so much more.
But just maybe in our cycle we too had the wrong upbringing and it just flowed downhill. I am glad to hear that your job has not hardened you, as it does so many. I wish more took the time to look deeper.

That was a great read. It helps put into perspective how important our relationships with our loved ones are to them from another point of view. It also is good to know some CO's realize how very hard the life our inmates lead really can be. We need to keep that in perspective.

Lulu, I think I had read that before from Joey's mom. If it wasn't the same thing then it was really similar to this one also. Wow it just shows how the guards are sometimes human. Thanks for sharing it with us.

Cherrie from tx
yes guards are humans and they do have feelings, im working on becoming a correctional officer and my husband is doin
you have to be mentaly fit for this job

Wow it was hard for me to continue reading that letter through my tears, God bless her for sharing that with us and we can only pray that there are more people like her working in the prison system with the same compassion and understanding.

I'd love to see letters like that from CO's written and published in newspapers everywhere. It seems society has gotten so into this punishment and revenge mentality that they forget to put human faces on the people involved.

This is the second time I've read this letter, and the tears just flow. It would be so nice if the co's realized that we are human, and just maybe deserve a little respect when we visit. Some are so hard core that if you cry when you see your loved one, they wonder why? I think they are the one's who are not human, and have treated people the same for so long that they don't know any different.

this really brung me to tears. because i know that my husband is a good guy and there are some guys in there who also good guys and they are punished to harsh. it is so sad to see them like that. when i visit my husband with our daughter i know that these hours are what he cherish. so do we. but towards the end of the visit i know he starts getting sad and so do we. One day i sat back and thought of the process of they have to gothrough when they go on a visit. How they have to checked to go in. it is like they been violated and it is so sad. i have a long 10 years till my husband come home. i wsh i didn't. it sad because he is so young 23 and he will be there his whole 20's going through the crap he goes through. But i love him to death and i took the vow to stick by him through thick and thin better or worse and that is what i am doing. i love him to death.

I too have run across a few co's that were really nice and do agree it usually seems to be the older ones that are the nicer although there have been one or two here and there younger ones who have been nice!

~N~

i have never met any co or officer with any kind of compassion as far as i am concern why do you care you go on with your lives every day then go to work to take your frustrations out on someone other then your own families you use inmates like punching bags treat them like they less then crap on the bottom of your shoe so believe me i dont think you care about anyone but your self i know this my husband has been suffering for a year now with medical issue and everyone from the top down has turn a blind eye.so give me a break and get real you know you dont care i dont even know why they let you post or be allowed to be here where we as a family suffer because of you alls treatment of our love ones:angry: :angry: :angry: :angry: :angry: :angry:

wow this letter was really touching.... it really touched my heart... I was even crying.... thanks lulu for posting it

your more then welcome, glad u have enjoyed it

glad u enjoy it

glad u enjoyed it

I just read the letter from the officer... I plan to print it up and make copies... it's all about perspective, folks...

lulu well I can understand some of it but how about when your son gets hit from a hit -n -run driver that says its a accident but wont turn his self in or makes a younger person takes the blame saying I will kill u if u dont take the blame well that happen to my son he got hit by a man that is still out here in these streets and they only gave the 15 year old a year my son has a son and now my grandson has to grow up without a father cause the man wanted to go 70 miles a hour and kill him and what about the men and women that knows right from wrong that keeps goin back to jail/prisons I am not tryin to be mean all I am saying is what about them

I was positively surprised to see that a Correctional Officer actually expressed sympathy for the inmates. It is all too seldom seen. I would imagine that this Officer is carrying a burden on his shoulders almost unbearable. That would explain his letter, the contents and his reasoning.

However, I was horrified at the end. How someone can justify shooting someone who is trying to escape is barbaric. At least if this person poses no immediate danger to someone else (for example hostage taking etc). If this guard had any decency, he would either quit or at least be reconsiled with the thought that firing a warning shot would suffice. If not, then he could always claim to have missed or whatever. Any reprisals would be a drop in the ocean compared to the guilt of knowing that he had shot and killed another human being.

In Sweden the prison guards are not even armed. Security is maintained anyway. You don´t need guns to make people remain incarcerated.

As a former inmate I fully agree with the COs discription of life in a prison.

I have known many COs like him. Fortunately there are more like him that care than the ones on a power trip and want to be cops. Or couldn't be cops and took plan B only to bring their frustrations with them.

COs are trained not to get personal or show any weakness. The system does not want them getting involved with the inmates on that level.
Good COs are tough when they need to be otherwise they are seen as weak and could lose control. I've seen good COs stand up for inmates when other COs wanted to punish them.

I've been in the Hole and even had one CO (not working in the hole) come in and ask if I was doing OK. He beleived I had a bum rap and took the time to visit.

The first CO I met when I arrived at my new housing unit asked me if I wanted to have my teeth kicked in - before I had a chance to open my mouth. So you learn who the good and the bad are pretty fast.

Some COs get assaulted in prison and get a hard on for inmates. They may never put it behind them and change.

I've seen inmates put down plans to hurt a guard as well. Inmates will stand up for good COs because they don't want to lose them.

I'm glad to see a CO post from their perspective. They didn't make the system. They are stuck in the same mess the inmates are. They want to do their time and get out too.

I was positively surprised to see that a Correctional Officer actually expressed sympathy for the inmates. It is all too seldom seen. I would imagine that this Officer is carrying a burden on his shoulders almost unbearable. That would explain his letter, the contents and his reasoning.

However, I was horrified at the end. How someone can justify shooting someone who is trying to escape is barbaric. At least if this person poses no immediate danger to someone else (for example hostage taking etc). If this guard had any decency, he would either quit or at least be reconsiled with the thought that firing a warning shot would suffice. If not, then he could always claim to have missed or whatever. Any reprisals would be a drop in the ocean compared to the guilt of knowing that he had shot and killed another human being.

In Sweden the prison guards are not even armed. Security is maintained anyway. You don´t need guns to make people remain incarcerated.
I think you are reading a little too far into the post. Most officers will only use deadly force to prevent an escape as a last resort. In the situation mentioned (which is completely hypothetical by the way), should an inmate escape from a building, waltz right in front of a tower, then approach a 18 foot wall or a fence covered in razor wire, the officers going to call it in on his radio and the inmate will probably be dogpiled by officers before he even has a chance to escape. The weapons mentioned would more likely be used in a riot situation, especially if an officer or officers are down.

THNX 4 sharing this letter! It gives me hope to see that yes, there are good COs as well . . .

hello all...as a former CO I read the letter and that in a nutshell is how it goes...when I worked for DOC I was tough as nails, didn't want to show inmates respect...they didn't know me, there was no need for me to know them...but I worked in the same unit for two years and within that two years...I gained alot of respect and trust from them...they wouldn't let anything happen to me....if there were words about me, they were protecting me...it is hard to seperate your emotions from what the state expects you to have....now that I am soon to be married to an inmate, I know...I respect all that they have to go through...the denied visits, no mail, no rec, lockdowns...all of it....they are humans and made a mistake...I pray for the guys (my boys) who I looked after...do I miss it that much...no...but the CO's are doing what they are told...and that is a hard to thing to do....take care and god bless to all....

I guess it's kind of like the medical profession. Some doctors, nurses, etc.,. separate themselves mentally in order to survive. Especially psychiatrists. But there's a fine line between separating work and your personal life. If you have integrity, it should follow through to your work and personal life. You shouldn't be one person one place, and another somewhere else. This letter really gave me hope as well. Hope that maybe, just maybe there are still COs and those in law enforcement who care.

I was once told by our local sheriff's mother that he knew some inmates had just made mistakes. But he said he couldn't treat one better than another because it would make that one a target for the other prisoners. I can see where that would be true.

But there are some in law enforcement who have let the power go to their heads. They have forgotten the meaning of humanity. They have forgotten the "to serve and to protect" on their badges. And those that work in prisons who have forgotten that they are dealing with human beings. Some who probably treat their pets better than they do their fellow human beings.

:thumbsup:this was so touching

I was not sure where this goes. Sorry if it is in the wrong place. A freind of mine shared this with a group and i thought i would share it with you.

As I write you, I sit in a tower watching and waiting above one of the largest prisons in the state of Alabama.
As I was sitting, I felt a need to write a letter to tell parents and young adult some of the things that I do and see every day in my chosen profession, as a correctional officer.

I see many sorrows, few real honest smiles and less joy. The sorrows come by many things; one person may have missed an approved visit that he may have worked hard to get. The reason may have been that the inmate broke a rule and the visit was denied or postponed as a punishment, or "his people" didn't come for some reason, or no reason at all.

Many sorrows come by a death in the family or perhaps an illness, and the inmate cannot get in touch with anyone to find out what has happened, or what is being done about the situation. I have heard an inmate not much older than myself, preparing funeral arrangements for one of his parents from prison. I caught myself trying to grasp how he must have felt, and I could not imagine the pain or sorrow. Many times the only thing that they can do is to sit and wait, for hours- sometimes days. I have watched grown men break down and cry from frustration over things you and I don't ever stop to think about, such as a busy signal on a telephone.

Many of us consider no mail as a blessing, sometimes; however, many inmates consider "junk mail" as a blessing because it was sent to them alone. Many receive no mail at all, ever. Some inmates don't know where their family is, or how to contact them, sons, daughters, wives or grandchildren. No one.

Some people will carry a sorrow to their grave, because they will never see "the other side of the fence" as long as they live. Some make the best of the situation. Can you pause for a moment to think what it would be like to never watch TV alone again, or be able to watch what you wanted, or never go fishing or hunting-to hear the sound of the fall leaves rustle under you feet as you walk through the woods with you girl or your wife? If that doesn't shake you, then how about never being able to hold your husband or wife when ever you want to, to pull them close to you and tell them that you love them, never being able to share their company again, or to make love again, as long as you both shall live. You won't be able to enjoy the children as you should, or be able to watch them grow up, to watch him play football, or to watch her go out on her first date, and to wait up until she is safely home. You won't be able to see your grand children grow up, after your children get married, at the wedding you missed, because you were sitting in prison serving a sentence of "life without parole" or will sit somewhere on death row. Where some people fearing, some praying for their time to come, for the execution of their sentence.

Many of us work in a noisy environment-we will stand the pressures and the stresses of the day, to race home for the comfort of our home and to see our wife and children, waiting with open arms to greet us when we arrive.

Imagine living in an environment where the noise seldom stops and the frustrations always runs high and you have very little, in any, choice in what you eat, wear, do or go. You do the same thing day in, and day out, day after day, year after year, with little change. With no one to turn to or no one to lean on, in a place where friends are near non existent and close relationships are even more rare. Debts can cost you all that you have to you name, it can cost you your body, even your life.

My fellow officers and I come to work each day and see the toll it takes on a man to be placed behind a fence and bars, to be stripped of the most private and personal act of being a human being, such as openly caring for someone, or to cry in front of other people, because it may be taken as a weakness. You and I take our freedom for granted. I can promise you that an inmate will treasure the few moments that they get to spend on an eight hour pass with their wife and children. That is the very few inmates that are allowed to take advantage of this privilege.

Many inmates have only a letter or a postcard to hold on to, to keep them going. I have sat for hours and talked with men and their problems, such as their wife has left them, and she has custody of the children, or their parole officer is delaying a parole over a simple matter such as paper work, or a medical examination. Or the officer didn't get to it, he was on two weeks of vacation.

I have sat and looked at pictures of families, a wife, of children and pets and many other things. I have heard stories and the tales about the people in the pictures and have felt compassion for the both of them. I have even cried and prayed for these men when I was alone by my self.

I have often wondered if I had the right to shoot someone that would attempt to escape. With in my reach I have a 12 gage shotgun loaded with .00 buckshot. If the need were to arise that I should have to use it, well, it would certainly maim or kill. I have found an answer. It is in my bible. It tells me that I ma to obey all authority: the State of Alabama is my authority. It tells me that I am to stop an inmate if he attempts to escape, to use the force necessary to accomplish this, which includes deadly force. If it weren't for God's approval the government wouldn't exist.

My job is hard. I must see the sorrows and fears of these men and have compassion as a Christian. As an officer, I must at times do things which seem to show little or no mercy.

Parents and young adults, please listen to what I have to tell you. Teach your children well, to do what is right, teach them how to tell the difference between right and wrong. Teach them that is never too late to come back to our living savior, but most of all teach them how to serve him day to day. Because if you don't, well, I have told you some of the things that I see and witness each day that I walk through a gate , for my Lord and state.

I will leave you with this bible verse; it goes,

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he shall not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:7

THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!!! mY SON JUST CAME HOME AFTER 11MONTHS!! AND YOUR LETTER HAD HIM IN TEARS ALSO!!! BUT HE DID SAY ALL OF THE CO'S ARE NOT BAD!!! ALOT OF THEM ARE JUST LIKE HIM,THE ONES THAT REALLY CARE!! ONCE AGAIN THANK YOU FOR A BEAUTIFUL LETTER!!!!

Thank you for posting the letter Lulu. I knew that there are good and bad people working inside the prison. Just like everywhere, there are good and bad people. God bless the good people who help our loved ones through the worst of times.

To Lulu,
Well written!!
From another officer in Texas.

OMG thank you for that letter.. It really touched my heart - girl I'm sittin here in tears imagining the struggle they must face every day. I pray to God that more COs like him are placed in the system with God's approval. I guess we all forget to think of the other man when we are so busy with our lives and day-2-day routines. Thank you again for the insight. God Bless you,

I am truly touched by your words!

Sure. That letter would touch anyone that has a heart and any compassion. And it is nice to know that there are some CO's that give some thought to the things that they see everyday. And I am sure that there are some genuinely good hearted people in the profession. BUT.....where are the upstanding CO's that will take a stand against the ones that do horrible things to inmates? And yes, I realize that there are inmates that make the job harder, and force the officers hand. I am not talking about those instances. And I'm not talking about the CO who is rude to me in the visiting room. Cause, let's face it, some people are just rude, period. Doesn't matter what profession they are in. I am more concerned about what takes place beyond the visiting room. I am talking about the officers who take it as thier place to be the "punisher". Or they feel that they are above the law. Better than that, they feel that they ARE the law. The ones that orchestrate beat downs and shankings and sexual assaults. The ones that bring in the contraband for profit. The ones that are actually gang members themselves. There is some sick sh*t going on. Everyone knows it. But no one does a thing about it. I read an article, not long ago, about a CO who spoke out, testified in court against the "brotherhood". He was the only one out of hundreds.He is no longer a CO, and is living in hiding, in fear for his life. Because he knows that it is only a matter of time before he is found out and in his own words he will be "done".
Had he not been the only one, and ALL of the good ones had stood with him, he possibly wouldn't be in this position now. I will be optimistic and say that I believe that there are more good than bad. So, why don't they stand up, put the scum out, and make this situation better for all parties involved? Better for the CO's. Better for the inmates. Better for the families. In my opinion, sitting in a watch tower, having a few compassionate thoughts about the incarcerated, is all well and good. But without action it changes nothing. Means nothing.

:rolleyes:So where are these others that stiil have a conscience and maybe left is a little heart???Cause Its getting harder to be the lone warriors in a army thats players are getting more scarce as we fight,and the battle is getting more important to be conquered.My fiance has been one of those inmates that has made a 360 degree turn around,yes more since we got together.He's been incarcerated now 9 years we met almost 6 1/2 yrs ago as penpals but we were in need to find one another. Anyways,we are either "a love us"kinda couple or "hate us" kinda couple but the problem is I now live in the town of the prison but its a small town needless to say all the corrupt kind of business they can put their hands down in {C.O} they do and the local families have to pay the ultimate prices for the crap they are involved in.A few of the C.O.'s have a very Mouth full of crap look" on their faces when certain acts of retaliation is acted out upon us families.We as inmates families have very little,and yes behind the gates and walls they have even less,but lets e real here their still our husbands and as a man head of the family comes extra worry and their desire to protect and provide in which both their limits are firm....Why dont we stand up as a whole to show the largest union now in power The peaceofficers union,We gotta make them show some accountability for these dirty acts of cowardly power they try to enforce.Come on these are anyone who has a GED and no felonies,but some misdeameners are still acts of a crime and violence it just depends on when and how it was gotten.They think power omes hard with a can of pepperspray and a club,and most threatenng a set of keys that jingle as they walk and boast about the lockdowns,for nothing except to get more overtime to help with their vacations,lies being said about an inmates wife,just to get a normal male reaction but in prison means 3-6 months in the hole,You know I could go on and on but then again I'm one of the ones that is always speaking up and out for our rights and the inmates breached rights.....How about the rest standing up in a united front????Raymondzwifey:thumbsup::p:):):p:pow::argh : Lets make some nose guys!!!! Sure. That letter would touch anyone that has a heart and any compassion. And it is nice to know that there are some CO's that give some thought to the things that they see everyday. And I am sure that there are some genuinely good hearted people in the profession. BUT.....where are the upstanding CO's that will take a stand against the ones that do horrible things to inmates? And yes, I realize that there are inmates that make the job harder, and force the officers hand. I am not talking about those instances. And I'm not talking about the CO who is rude to me in the visiting room. Cause, let's face it, some people are just rude, period. Doesn't matter what profession they are in. I am more concerned about what takes place beyond the visiting room. I am talking about the officers who take it as thier place to be the "punisher". Or they feel that they are above the law. Better than that, they feel that they ARE the law. The ones that orchestrate beat downs and shankings and sexual assaults. The ones that bring in the contraband for profit. The ones that are actually gang members themselves. There is some sick sh*t going on. Everyone knows it. But no one does a thing about it. I read an article, not long ago, about a CO who spoke out, testified in court against the "brotherhood". He was the only one out of hundreds.He is no longer a CO, and is living in hiding, in fear for his life. Because he knows that it is only a matter of time before he is found out and in his own words he will be "done".
Had he not been the only one, and ALL of the good ones had stood with him, he possibly wouldn't be in this position now. I will be optimistic and say that I believe that there are more good than bad. So, why don't they stand up, put the scum out, and make this situation better for all parties involved? Better for the CO's. Better for the inmates. Better for the families. In my opinion, sitting in a watch tower, having a few compassionate thoughts about the incarcerated, is all well and good. But without action it changes nothing. Means nothing.