I just read an article in the NY Times that talked about the prevalence of grandparents raising grandchildren and was curious to know if we have many "grands" raising their "grands" here on PTO due to your child's incarceration. If so how has life changed for you since becoming the primary caregiver for your grandchildren? Just curious.

Well, I didn't get my grandkids due to the incarceration of their mom, although she did later go to prison. I got the girls because they tested positive for drugs at birth, so I've had them both since they were newborn. They're almost 10 and almost 12 now.

I guess having them since their birth it just seems like a continuation of raising your own children in a way? I think grandparents like you should be commended for assuming that responsibility and so many do it graciously. I am a mom now and I have to be honest that I am so looking forward to the "empty nest" syndrome that I can't even imagine raising grandchildren. My hat goes off to you!!!

You ask about how raising grandkids changed your lives. We are the great-grandparents raising a now 2 and 5 year old. We went from plans of fishing traveling etc to changing diapers and going to ball games. The main problem is the money. We are having to use our retirement money to raise these girls and just hope it last. If you are a foster parent the state pays you something like $600.00 if you are a grandparent or great gran you get WIC until they are 5 medicaid and $55.00 per child from TANF--why can the system not understand we grandparents are saving the state money by raising these kids and increase the help grandparents get---this might be a great issue to get started since so many grandparents are raising their grandkids. In my case I am very happy to do it and wouldn't have it any other way; but could use a little more cash---
Proud grannie (from Texas)

Grannie you are so right. I have read so much about how the government just doesn't recognize that grandparents need the same assistance as traditional foster parents and that money is the biggest problem because as older adults your income is lessened. I have worked for an organization here that helps grandparents raising grandchildren. Have you checked to see if there are any such resources in your area that may be able to help?

Grannie you are so right. I have read so much about how the government just doesn't recognize that grandparents need the same assistance as traditional foster parents and that money is the biggest problem because as older adults your income is lessened. I have worked for an organization here that helps grandparents raising grandchildren. Have you checked to see if there are any such resources in your area that may be able to help?
I have been to the Texas health and human resources department. This is where CPS (child protection services) went with me and help me get the help I do. Like I said I get WIC (juice-milk-peanut butter-eggs-cereal ) for the 2 year old. When the other granddaughter turned 5 no more WIC--I also get medicaid and for both girls I get $110.00 a month from TANF ($55.00 each)---Do you know of any other help for grandparents out there? We make just a little to much money right now to get food stamps--this would be based on our income--the other is not. We have to dip in our retirement money each month because our income is not enough to cover our monthly bills
Proud grannie

I don't know of any real help here in Oregon. Actually if the grandparent gets help from the state then as soon as one of the parents gets a job the state starts taking money to reimburse theirselves.

My husband and I have had are 9 1/2 yr old granddaughter since the night she was born due to drugs and alcohol (Mom and Dad) Her Dad is my son. He did great from 18 to 25, then went off ADHD meds and downhill after that. Since July he has been incarcerated. He is now in Santiam Correctional, Salem. I have taken Linds to visit 3 times.

My husband and I also thought we would be fishing more and doing more things together. Not to be. I am still working full time and my husband works out of town and is gone some times 6 weeks at a time. UGH. We are very active in our church and youth group. Also involved in her school and extra curricular activities. If I didn't have our church support I would definitely be crazy by now.

Unfortunately all of the programs that I know about offer lots of support, but not too much in terms of real financial assistance. I do know that AARP does a lot to help grandparents. Here is a link that I hope you find useful.
http://www.aarp.org/life/grandparents/

Unfortunately all of the programs that I know about offer lots of support, but not too much in terms of real financial assistance. I do know that AARP does a lot to help grandparents. Here is a link that I hope you find useful.
http://www.aarp.org/life/grandparents/
I seem to remember a couple of grandparents I know raising their grandchildren received what the State of Oregon calls non-needy grant. But, I still think that if the parents get a job the State will be there to be reimbursed. I have never checked into it or any other benefits in Oregon. Since my husband and I both work I don't think we qualify. We both have insurance and since we have Full Guardianship of our granddaughter she is covered under us. One thing I don't like about "Guardianship" is that we have to fill out and submit papers every year to the court justifying why the court should still let us raise her.

I seem to remember a couple of grandparents I know raising their grandchildren received what the State of Oregon calls non-needy grant. But, I still think that if the parents get a job the State will be there to be reimbursed. I have never checked into it or any other benefits in Oregon. Since my husband and I both work I don't think we qualify. We both have insurance and since we have Full Guardianship of our granddaughter she is covered under us. One thing I don't like about "Guardianship" is that we have to fill out and submit papers every year to the court justifying why the court should still let us raise her.
We went with guardianship first and then as soon as we had the girls 6 months it was legal for us to get custody. It helps you allot more than guardianship. In Texas the kids had to have been with us 6 months before we could go to court to get custody--or should I say live in the same county we did. I would advise you to go with custody.
Proud grannie

I have full legal guardianship of the oldest girl and I adopted the youngest one. At the time of the adoption, the lawyer offered to do adoption for the older girl, too, for a smaller fee, but we didn't have the money to do that at the time. Children's Services paid for the adoption for the younger one. I guess I should have asked them to pay for both, but didn't think of it at the time. Both girls have the Oregon health coverage and they do expect the parents to pay even if you only get that, but after all, why shouldn't the parents be expected to do something? I had a soft heart about that for a few years but now I don't. We're giving up a lot to raise the kids and the parents need to face responsibility.

My husband and I owned a business and then later, he worked while I stayed home with the girls. I've since become more disabled and he passed away, so I'm a single parent at nearly 60 years old. I love the girls dearly and as if they were born to me, but it's definitely a challenge to be raising a second family when you're a grandparent.