These last few weeks have been so hard, with my DR pal getting that letter from his attorney stating his motion was denied, now they are seeking a death warrrent. I got his letter today and it had me in tears, I have tried to sit down and write him a letter but I cant, i start to cry and I just cant finish it.
I thought I could be stronger than this, I will have to be. Im sure there are others here that feel the same way. hopeless in this situation and when we feel this way, today has been a horrible day for me I think we need to have a yahoo conference with other members of loved ones on the row, where we can just all talk. Maybe it will not make the situation better, but ourselves feel better.

(hugs)

It can't be easy that's for sure...I dread that day should it every come *sigh*

Feel free to pm me if you need to talk !!!!

i understand how you must be feeling. i cant say i know the feeling for sure cuz im not in your situation, but i know it must be devistating. ((((hugs))))) just try and be strong for him because now he needs you more than ever. i do have a yahoo ID so if you want to talk just send me a pm and ill give the ID to you so we can have a chat. my man is on the row as well and this is very well a situation that i may one day have to face, so im here for you. send me a message and we can talk from there. until then i hope you can somehow find a way to cope. take care and keep your head up and you and your friend will be in my thoughts and prayer.

Dana ((hugs))
I am also here for you if you ever want to talk, or a shoulder. I dont know why the world is so cruel, but I will certainly keep you and your friend in my thoughts and prayers.

Your friend needs you now more than ever. If you are strong he can gain strength from you. I write a man on the row in another state and we are growing closer to the final year every moment.That thought never leaves me. Ironically, I had only told him a few minutes before finding this post that if it comes down to the state taking his life I want one of the last things he sees in this world to be the glory of his being shining in my eyes, which it does everytime I speak of him. I want to watch noone die, I believe the people of this country who can support the death penalty are allowing state approven murder to occur. But, I do want to hold my friends hand to the end if it comes to that, just as I would if he were dieng of cancer. He is dieing of a cancer of the spirit in this country.We have saw no death warrant, in fact we have been blessed in that the state he is incarcerated in had held off on thier normal schedule for a couple of years now. But,we expect the killing to begin anew come January and he has been inside already for 15 years. To make this an easier pill for me to swallow there is so often injustice in these cases. My friend was obviously rail roaded, sentenced to death,when his co-defendant walked with 5 years probation on a totally unrelated charge. I cannot tell you I know what it is to see that warrant, but I understand the fear of waiting and the anger at the system.I will not tell tell you that you have the strength to see this through to the bitter end, because that decision comes from your own heart. But, I will tell you that there is far more strength within us than we know, until the time comes that we need it. I have had this proven to me again and again. What I can tell you also, is that I understand how easy it is to get really close to these men. I read the posts from other people who are in relationships with long term offenders and know what I feel happens for many. The bond grows easily, naturally. The world is not between us in what we say and do. The things we share are not from the physical world, no touch, no outter sensation. Everything comes from within, all is intrinsic and it allows our spirits to grow in a way not possible with most free men.The bond is strong between us and these inmates, that they often feel a part of us, apart of our own being.A threat to thier well-being is a threat to us. You obviously care very much for your friend and want to do what is best. You did not hide, you reached out for comfort and advice. I know by now you have written the first letter. You have strength or you would have hidden not only from him, but from everyone here, as well. But, I would lovingly remind you your friend has been diagnosed with cancer. From here on out, it is in God's hands. All you can do is keep your faith and remain strong in whatever time you are given with him. Someone in this sight uses the quote,"Dream as if you live forever, Live as though you will die tommorrow." I can think of no greater words of wisdom for those facing the cruelty of the death penalty. Sadly, the large majority in our country feels comfortable with taking human life and many of us will face the road you now travel, we do feel for you both greatly. May God keep you safe and see you through the storms ahead....

((((hugs))))

Thanks Val:)
Where the heck have you been?? miss you.

Kricket that was beautifullly put and so true. I couldnt have said it better. I am going to be there for him, i made that choice the day i wrote him.

Awww Dana I am sorry to hear that? My pal is seeking to volunteer his own execution soon... he keeps hinting at it, but for some reason in my mind, i accept it. I accept that he no longer wants to be here and no longer wants to wait for them to decide when he dies.. he wants to decide. It's sad huh?

Cant blame him, I would rather decide, than have the state decide for me.

Everyone stay strong in knowing, no man is master of his own fate. By whatever name we may call him there is a Creator, who I believe assures there will ultimately be justice - even in the midst of the injustices done by those in government. I read a few days ago about the men involved in the executions here in Texas. Many of them have to quit, they suffer breakdowns and mental illnesses, for the guilt they carry. We may all be tortured by the death penalty, but the God I subscribe to will have his say with those who dare place themselves in his shoes, in deciding to take human life. Especially, when the decision is so often made by fraudulent means. My prayers are with you all.

Kricket, your words just touched me!