I know you have all read this, but someone told me I should post it here, so it would always be here, so that is what I am doing.

I love you Tracy and you may be gone but never forgotten!

The State of Mississippi killed Tracy Hansen today. Over the years, Tracy's life and his commitment to love and forgiveness affected many people. We were privileged to be among Tracy's friends and our lives will never be the same again.

While so many of us knew Tracy as a kind, generous, creative soul, we understand that for most members of the Ladner family, he was the person who took their father, husband, brother, and loved one. We hope Tracy's death in some way brings them the solace and closure they seek.

Not a day went by during which Tracy did not ache over his responsibility in taking Bruce Ladner's life. While in prison, Tracy learned that Mr.
Ladner was a kind, forgiving man whose integrity was an example to others. For that reason, Tracy dedicated his book, Life Matters, to Bruce Ladner's memory. Tracy also sought to embody those qualities that made Bruce Ladner such a special person.

But Tracy knew that to give his life meaning, he had to move beyond regret. In that spirit, Tracy shared his heart with numerous people. His warmth, generosity, humor, and eloquence made him a cherished confidant. advisor, and friend to many. Tracy became an accomplished writer whose poems, drawings, and books touched many in this country and overseas.

To our friends who are grieving, please know Tracy would want you to celebrate his life and his friendship. All of you who love Tracy know that he valued forgiveness above all. In his honor, we must learn to forgive the state and the people who took him from us.

Tracy had an amazing capacity to forgive. Despite the torture and rejection he experienced at the hands of his own family, Tracy managed to forgive and make peace with his childhood. Nevertheless, Tracy believed that no child should ever suffer as he did. For that reason, he asks that donations in
his name be made to organizations benefiting children around the world.

Along with Tracy, we wish to thank all of you who helped us fight for Tracy's life. We have been privileged to come into contact with many of Tracy's friends and loved ones. We cannot thank each of you enough for sharing your strength, courage, and love for Tracy Hansen with us. To the abolitionist community: we will never forget the way you came together for Tracy. It is an honor to be part of such a dedicated, committed group of people. We are also incredibly grateful for all the lawyers in Mississippi, California, Texas, and around the nation who generously gave us your time, creativity, knowledge and support. You amaze us. And, we are so grateful to our family and friends who stood by us during this most difficult time. We are humbled to be part of the phenomenal group of loved ones, activists and lawyers who stood up to say that Tracy's life was precious.

Tracy wanted his loved ones to find closure in whatever way seemed right to '" them. He did make one final request: to be taken out of the state of Mississippi. Tracy's ashes will thus be taken to England to be scattered in
a beautiful place. We will commemorate Tracy's life by planting a lemon
tree. We hope each of you finds a way to allow Tracy to continue being a positive force in your lives.

We will continue to battle against state-sponsored killing in hopes that our children will live in a world ruled by forgiveness, not vengeance.
Tracy will always be with us in that struggle…. Goodbye Tracy we Love you!

That is a beautiful tribute.

Oh, Softie... Thank you for sharing this here! I know that this still hurts your heart so much...

Tracy's memory will live on in our hearts...

That is beautiful. His propensity to forgive should be an example to everyone. Thanks for sharing a little about him. I know your heart is hurting, sharing him will help some.

Joy

You are right Joy it does help to share Tracy. A while before he was murdered by the State. My neighbor’s cat was going to have kitten. Tracy decided I should have one, he loved Cats and also my old had to be put to sleep. When the kittens were born I took a picture of them. I sent it to Tracy we went back and forth for a while deciding which one I should take. One week after he was killed the kitten was ready to come home. Oh Lord I had never had a little kitten before. My legs looked like I had lost a fight with berry bushes, and not a curtain was hanging in my house. I was beside myself, Teb told me it will get better when he gets older. I said sure if my legs don’t fall off first. He was just like Tracy in kitten form, make you so mad you could spit and then curl up in your lap for some love. Well I named the kitten Tracy and we lived through all of his antics…:)

I also received mail for almost a month after he died from Tracy, the were full of Love and Hugs. I found out that he had written them and arranged for a friend to mail them to me. He knew he would be gone and I would need that.
Tracy was the most wonderful man. I have known a lot of people in my personal life and work life. But I have never known one as Tracy full of so much Love and forgiveness.
Tracy gave me so much, even things I do today is because of him. He showed me more then anyone in my life ever has about life and Love. My life was and is greatly influenced by having Tracy in my life. If I could have seen the future and realized he would be executed. I would have not changed a thing, for the Love and memories he gave me for the years we were together are priceless. I would not trade them and what he has left me with for anything in the world.
I only pray that everyone can find the love that Tracy and I found one time in your life.
I am going to try and attach a picture of Tracy Jr, he is a little bigger now, but he won’t hold still for a picture anymore……:)
Sorry I blabbed on so long.

softie

Softie...

Awwww, Tracy Jr. is soooo cute!

Thanks for sharing him with us!

I have this need to explain a little of Tracy's crime because I need people to know a little more of who Tracy was.
When he commetted his crime, he was pulled over by a State Trooper. His girlfriend at the time was just like his Mom. Very controlling and she was yelling for Tracy to shoot the trooper. Tracy did he shot him twice. Once he did he realized what he had done, he flagged down a pick up truck and put the trooper in the pickup to go to the hospital. tracy then took off in the cop car, 36 hours later Officer Ladner died.
Tracy was on drugs and had a lived a henious childhood. I not only heard this from tracy, but from one of his brothers. Who had left because he couldn't handle the abuse that Tracy was getting.
The girl involved is serving LWOP in Mississippi. Tracy before he died even made peace with her writing a letter forgiving her for all she had done.
Does all that make it right what he did, no it doesn't and tracy knew that. But I just wanted to explain the circumstances that lead him to the Row.

softie

This was written about 2 months ago, it is sad to see what the guys left go through when there is an execution. Alan told me that more CO's called in sick the day of Tracy's execution then in Parchman's history, because they wanted no part of it.

On death row, it's a long wait for the end
Inmates reflect on Hansen's execution, their own fates
By MARGARET BAKER
THE SUN HERALD

As state prison officials strapped Tracy Alan Hansen to a gurney and executed him in July, friend and fellow death row inmate Alan Dale Walker stayed locked in a jail cell, trying to find comfort from visiting chaplains he hasn't seen since.

He had to reach out to the visitors through the steel bars that contain him and remind him of the freedom he has lost and the death that likely awaits him.

"On the day of the execution, some chaplains came around and shared with the guys who wanted to talk," Walker wrote shortly after Hansen's July 17 execution. "I spoke with one, but really it does no good to talk to them.

"They're strangers, and just because they are chaplains and they're listening to you doesn't help me at all. When I am hurting and sad, it does me no good to talk to a stranger. I have to deal with my pain and sadness in my own way."

Walker and other death row inmates wrote about the experience in never-before published letters to The Sun Herald.

Now, he and other inmates are trying to prepare themselves for a second execution; this time around, it's convicted killer Jessie Derrell Williams, 51, who is expected to be strapped to the gurney and killed now that the U.S. Supreme Court has rejected his final appeal.

Williams, however, filed court papers Friday asking the state Supreme Court for a stay of execution. In court documents, he said he should have been appointed new attorneys during the appeal process and also that the state never proved that he had killed someone in the commission of another crime, which is mandatory for a death sentence. Williams has told The Sun Herald that he is innocent of the crime.

Attorney General Mike Moore asked that Williams be put to death some time before Dec. 4 for the 1983 rape, stabbing and mutilation death of Karon Ann Pierce, 18, of Escatawpa. The execution date is expected to be set some time this week.

Walker expects life on death row to change for the day when Williams is put to death. He can only compare the experience to Hansen's execution in July because it was the first carried out in the state in 13 years.

"Not a lot goes on before an execution (for us)," he said. "I'm sure the prison is doing a lot of stuff, but we are not aware of this. We are locked down." The following day, he said, "everything is the same as always."

Walker said Hansen's death was particularly hard for him because the two men had forged a friendship over the years that prison officials were aware of and even acknowledged just one day before Hansen's death when they allowed the two men to say their goodbyes in private.

"I am not going to tell you what we spoke about," Walker wrote, "but I will say I had time to say goodbye face to face, and I loved it. Being able to say goodbye... was the nicest act of kindness anyone has ever shown me since I have been here."

Much like the remaining 65 death row inmates, Walker didn't know what to expect the day Hansen was executed for the April 1987 shooting death of state Trooper Bruce Ladner in Harrison County. This time around, he said, he and other inmates expect to be locked in their cells for the day without their usual hour of outdoor recreation in the prison yard.

The entire experience is an eerie one, said inmate Tom Loden. "To fully understand this, one must comprehend that there are but 65 of us, a rather small group. Sure, we come from many different backgrounds, races, even religions, but we all have a common interest; therefore the passing of one, we all feel... Tracy was an alarm to most here, the clock ticks on for all... ."

Still, some inmates, including quadruple killer Stephen McGilberry, wrote about the execution as if it were nothing more than an inconvenience because prisoners weren't allowed their usual hour of oudoor recreation time.

"Everything else," McGilberry wrote, "was the same."

For inmate Howard Neal, life on death row changed shortly after Hansen's execution date was set. He still has memories of the nights leading up to the killing when he heard Hansen crying in his cell because he didn't want to die.

"Tracy was my friend," Neal wrote. "I didn't want them to kill Tracy. It hurt me to hear Tracy (was) killed. "

The day of the execution, Neal said he didn't want to talk to anyone.

"I was thinking that could be me they killed that day."

Walker said he was somewhat surprised by how some of the prison guards reacted to Hansen's death. He said they, too, suffered much like the remaining death row inmates.

"The prisoners who had love for Tracy were deeply affected and this hurt us all," Walker said. "Some of the nicer guards hated to see it and were sad that it took place. Some didn't know what to think, and others didn't... get close enough to the inmates to really care one way or the other. Some of the guards wanted no part of it. I spoke to one or two (guards) who wanted to get away from this place. They didn't want to be this close to death."

Loden said the majority of people seem to forget one very important point when it comes to the executions.

"Yes, we all have justly been sentenced," he wrote, "but would it surprise anyone that we still feel, that we still are human?

"As far as being aware of who is next, we all are, but this is something that's not really openly discussed. We do try to show respect to one another.

(But) overall... the hardest part of the row isn't the end, it's the dying a little each day... knowing you're but one day closer to death."

THIS IS TRULY HEART BREAKING.IM SO SORRY FOR YOUR PAIN.TERRANCE IS ON DEATH ROW AND I PRAY EVERY DAY WE GET HIS CONVICTION OVERTURNED I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT I WOULD DO.GOD BLESS YOU AND TRACY AND LIL TRACY

Softie, Thank you for sharing , Little Tracy Jr. is a cutie pie.

Kris
Thank you for the words, but I don't want anyone to be sad. Tracy told me shortly before his death. If you have anger, hate, sadness in your heart there is no room for Love.
I don't want people to be sad he is not here, but happy he was here. And happy for all he left here, his love his caring for so many. I thank God every day he is out of the nightmare of Parchman.

Never give up hope with Terrence, sometimes that is all you have. I didn't give up hope until it was over and his body was gone. Don't let what might be ruin what you have now.

I will remember you and Terrence in my prayers.
If you ever need to vent, just yell I'll listen.

softie

Softie, your buddy is cute. I have a cat that wants to remain free, but is at my back door every night for over two years now. He's all black and if you stomp you foot he's gone...POOF, so I call him Spookie. :-) He got a chicken leg tonight, so he's a real happy cat!

It is wonderful, the memories you have and how you are handling them! It is people like Tracy, that make us in part, what and who we are today.

softie...i made it through the tribute and even the kitty...but the fact that he had letters sent out to you after he was gone...leaves me speechless.

thank you for sharing tracy (both tracys) with us.

emme

B-Ray don't let the cute little kitten look fool you. He shreaded my legs and pulled down every curtain in the place. He loves water and is always in the toliet, sink when I am trying to do dishes and also has jumped in the bath tub with me. Every other animal I have had the spray bottle works, not him he lays down he loves being sprayed.......:)

emme that is just the way he was, he knew I would need them from him to make it through. He also made sure I had a tshirt from him and a couple tape recordings, so I can hear him anytime I want. He even send me some of his hair. Lord only knows how he ever was able to get the things out of there he did, but he did it.

softie

THANKS SOFTIE I WILL KEEP THAT IN MIND AND IF YOU HEAR SOMEONE SCREAMING IT IS ME.THANKS FOR THE PRAYERS ALSO.LOVE YA KRIS

Softheart

May the Good Lord bless and keep you. I know Tracy is in his Arms now and He will sit beside God. Jesus his brother is with him too.

This is so sad. I only wish and I pray daily that there will be a Moritorium soon on the Death Penalty.. I also have a sweet wonderful friend who's Son and Brother are on Death Row in N.C. There executions will be scheduled very soon, because, their appeals have all been denied and there are no more. The only hope they have is Clemency and Gov Easly will never allow that.

God Bless you Child

Donna

Thank you Donna, the Lord has blessed me so many times in my life. And he blessed me extra when he brought Tracy in my life. Knowing where he is a confort beyond words.

yes one day i pray to see this madness stopped.

softie

Softie, I wish I had seen this sooner, the tribute is beautiful, as is your Tracy. Thank you for sharing this, and for sharing the picture of Tracy jr., you truly are an amazing woman. :)

hugs,
Cindy

Softie,

Thank you my friend for sharing Tracy with us. I have tried many times to read this since you posted it. I have never been able to make it all the way through till today.

Through you - Tracy continues to teach others to forgive.

Including me.... God loves all of you - and Tracy - Thank You

I know in my heart of hearts that Tracy is with God and is watching over you and the little one.

Patti

I only wish I had the forgivness that Tracy had. Thank you for allowing me to share him with you. He was truly an amazing person.

hugs
softie