To whom ever read:
Today I'm feeling realy down, the father of my child will be locked up for 12 years and must do 85% of his time before he'll go up for parole. He will be gone now for a year, and it hurt so bad, I was 5 months pregnant when he went away, that was the hardest thing I ever had to deal with, but I came to the thought that once my son is here he would keep my loved one off my mind, but now that my son has been born and time is passing the pain is becoming Overwelming now, I want him to see his son laugh, play, and run, and say new words, and so much more. But on the other hand, my pain that I'm feeling is making me hate him, I should'nt say hate him but I have alot of hate towards him( for him getting sent to prison).And not to metion as soon as he got locked up, I found out about another woman( that he was messing with before he got locked up), I guess you can say all his skeletons came out of the closet.When I found out about her it killed me, so I felt like, why should I stay by his side when he's doing me wrong, so I decided to move on with my life and raise my son. Time went on and i just could'nt get over him I dont know how to explain it, I was feeling bad,NO I just love the man:o But now I'm wondering if he's still writing her, now that I have decided to come around. he says no, but he wont tell me if he is. Im at the point that I want to come around, and try to make things work ( I want my son to know who is daddy is) but Im just afraid to be Hurt , he promised that he's not writing her. Im Just so confused, and hurting like crazy:confused: I just dont know:(
(One of Bad dayz:o

Jayo's girl:

I want to read your message, but can't. Could you edit it to change the font to something dark enough to be legible?

thanks

abner

If you highlight it it is readable - thats what i did.

I don't want to sound like a doubting thomas, but you have to do what is right for your child. that should be your first priority. I have a child with my man in prison and it kills me daily to see him grow and change and become a young man, without his father here every day. And my son is almost 12. My man was locked up the day my son was born. I live every day as is comes and take care of things out here. We visit, and write, but that all takes time, and you have to take care of you...It gets easier, but it takes a long time for the pain to go away, and it never does completely, trust me on that, you just learn to deal....Take care of the two of you out here, and the rest will come together,...i promise. :)

Jayo's girl:

I want to read your message, but can't. Could you edit it to change the font to something dark enough to be legible?

thanks

abnerI would change it, Only of I knew how to! Im sorry I'm still new to this:cool:

I don't want to sound like a doubting thomas, but you have to do what is right for your child. that should be your first priority. I have a child with my man in prison and it kills me daily to see him grow and change and become a young man, without his father here every day. And my son is almost 12. My man was locked up the day my son was born. I live every day as is comes and take care of things out here. We visit, and write, but that all takes time, and you have to take care of you...It gets easier, but it takes a long time for the pain to go away, and it never does completely, trust me on that, you just learn to deal....Take care of the two of you out here, and the rest will come together,...i promise. :) Thank you!

Hey there!! Dont be to hard on yourself.Ive been in your shoes for 15 yrs.I know how you feel. Its a real hard thing to go thru, raising children without their fathers.Ive had alot of hate in my heart too. I look at my boys and wonder how on earth could he of been so selfish and stupid.You'll never get over it but it will get easier as the yrs go bye.try to make you happy.Be careful and dont get hurt.Follow your gut instinct about him and her and most of the time your right.If anything try and remain friends for your child.Stay close to friends for support.Take care....

I would change it, Only of I knew how to! Im sorry I'm still new to this:cool:


Much better! :D

Hope you like the new color choice!

Diane

Much better! :D

Hope you like the new color choice!

DianeThankx for changing the color for me:p

Hey there!! Dont be to hard on yourself.Ive been in your shoes for 15 yrs.I know how you feel. Its a real hard thing to go thru, raising children without their fathers.Ive had alot of hate in my heart too. I look at my boys and wonder how on earth could he of been so selfish and stupid.You'll never get over it but it will get easier as the yrs go bye.try to make you happy.Be careful and dont get hurt.Follow your gut instinct about him and her and most of the time your right.If anything try and remain friends for your child.Stay close to friends for support.Take care....Thank you very much, Do you ever take your kids to visit there father? I take my son he's one so he does'nt know what's going on, but you your children how did you explain to them what had happened, if you dont mind me asking. I know my son is young now but time fly by so quick and soon he's going to ask where his dad is or why come his dad cant come home, I dont have a clue what to say.....maybe I'm jumping the gun to quick, but these are the things that stay on my mind, you know!