I have never been in trouble with the Law before but I find myself in really deep now. I'm looking at 10years maybe more not for sure at this time waiting for my sentencing date... the crime is SO. I'm really afraid of what will happen to me in prison have heard that it is a hard road in prison for a sex offender. Here is the big question?? I have been told by a couple of friends that I should run and not go to prison..Hell, I'm even affraid of doing that!! Is it possible to run and not get caught... If so any tips on how!!!Any thought on this may help me!! Thanks

My husband and I thought of doing this beofre he was sentenced but decided against it.....although he isnt in for S.O. prison isnt as bad as he thought it would be--I also think you have the option of keeping your crime to your self--some of the guys who have been in can give you better advice on how to survive...Myopinion and advice to you is DONT run...get your time over with--if you run you will always be looking over your shoulder and if you get caught after running you just made things a whole lot worse....my motto is everything in life comes back to bite you in the ass so make wise choices...I know you must be scared, but keep God close to your heart and HE will guide you through this.....we are here to listen and give you support....also make sure any deal you sign you are comfortable with it, and like I said bevore I am sure the guys who have been in can ofer you more advice than I can.........sending you a BIG HUG!

If you go to prison, it is temporary. If you run, it is forever looking over your shoulder, never at peace. My advice is face the music.

There are some members of PTo who have served time for sexual offenses- maybe they can help you also.

Good luck to you-you are in my prayers.

It is going to be hard to hide your offense in prison, as prisoner clerks work in most areas. The details of your crime will get out. Secondly, it also depends upon how young you are and how "pretty" or weak the tougher prisoners find you. Thirdly, it turns on what sort of prison you are sent to -- things will be different in a maximum security joint than in a medium/first-offender type of place.

As for wheather to run, that also depends upon how much time you are facing, how much money you have, criminal experience, etc. From the sounds of your post you are not a good candidate for running.

What ever you do, good luck.

Well I would agree with Amelia and Sherry. Don't run !! You would probably make your life worse . Don't tell the reason why you're incarcerated. I think that ex-inmates on PTO will give you good advice on how to behave once in prison.
I will keep you in my thoughs.
Stay strong
Philippe

I want to thank everyone for the help!!! This is a great site!!

In a few words...........

Run= a life time of self imprisonment

Leave the country= a person without a country

In both case's, there has to be a great plan and money to support it! It doesn't appear that you have the crimal mind-set to even too try that, let alone work it.

Hopefully, more "inside" insight will come shortly.

bless your heart, they ar right, i know it is hard and that you are afraid, but running is not the answer. you will for ever be loking over your shoulder,

my heart goes out to you, IF you decide to go to Prison, please know that i would not mind writing you, please know that if you ever need me, dont hesitate to email me.
of you would like to pm me or email me, i will give you my address just in case you decide to go that route.

lulu

lulu66@netwest.com

Looking at time is hard - and running may seem appealing right now. Odds are you will get caught then you will have an escape charge on top of what you are looking at right now. If you will contact some of us through PM's or email then we will be here for you and you do not have to be alone.

I agree w/Amelia...but I agree w/Ed too! and w/BRay...it's too hard to say one thing here!

DON'T RUN! End of story.

My Partner did run. In fact he escaped custody and he is really paying for it now! He was on the run for a year. Thought that he was under the radar! NOPE! They not only got him but he got way more time because of it.

Sasquatch633,
Take it from someone that has both run (for over a year) and done time, it's better to face it now, than deal with a monkey on your back and still most likely face it in the future.

Not so long ago, you did have a fair chance at running and not getting caught. With the advent of computers and the Internet, your chances just got much less, and will continue to do so as technology becomes more of a tool for law enforcement. It's unlikely to not have your prints run NCIC (National Crime Info Computer) any time you go to jail in the U.S. now. Further, if you travel abroad, your passport is scanned virtually everywhere..
Bottom line is your fingerprints, and soon your facial features, will identify you quickly.
Here in Texas you have to put your finger on a scanner when you get your drivers license. Other states are going this way as well. In the near future when you get pulled over by the police, you will be putting your finger on a scanner to ID yourself..
All of this is relative though.. If you want to run, you can.. and you can be successful with it.. But, if your crime is serious, they may pursue you hard.. Or, they may decide to let you make a mistake.
If you really want to do it right, you have to wash your hands completely of your past.. Family, Friends, old habits, etc.. Kiss them all goodbye.. You will also be smart to go to another country, such as Mexico or South America.. The further the better... Do you have the financial means to do this and be successful?
For me, it wasn't worth it in the end, and I don't know if I could/would give up everything that is me for a 10 year sentence.. Which you will do 5-8 of most likely, unless they reduce or enhance the time required on your sentence..
Just my 2 cents,
David

I AGREE WITH WHAT DAVID HAS SAID!

Welcome to PTO, and I would say don't run, it would make matters worse. (just my opinion) Good luck, whatever you decide.

I agree with David and I also would have to say dont run face the music and get it over cause you can run and 10 years down the line get cought and then have to serve your time plus maybe more for running and then see what it has caused you your life I mean dont run get it over and here 5 or 8 years down the line be out again free and have t he rest of your life to live.....

Knowing a number of people (men & woman) that have and are still underground, it is a major step in your life to make for it is not the same thing as running away from home when you were a child. a complete new identification process has to take place, including the divorce of family, friends, habits, work trade, etc., and not to mention the modifying of fingerprints (not a problem in N.Y.) for the benefit of N.C.I.C.
If you are facing the music in a State prison you will be more that likely be in Administrative Seg., i.e., the "hole." Where if you are looking at Federal time you will be in population and there won't be a problem. I wish you luck in your grave decision for it is not an easy one

I WOULD GO AHEAD AND DO THE TIME AND GET IT OVER WITH.AND YOU CAN ALWAYS NOT TELL ANYONE WHY YOU ARE IN.GOOD LUCK!!

law r us,,,, welcome to the group,,,,glad to have you with us

lulu

Hmmm, now this really is a hard decision...... Honestly, my first reaction was 'run like the wind'. I served a few years myself, and before going in, I came very close to skipping out. (I was facing 20+ yrs). I chose to do my time.... it wasn't easy, but I did it!
Now, speaking from an 'ex-felons' perspective.... I would never go back! If anything happened by chance, or if I were to make a mistake, or whatever... I would run faster than any of us could blink! They would have to hunt me down and drag me kicking in screaming to get me back in prison!
Either road you choose to take is going to be difficult.... So, like everyone, I wish you luck in whichever way you go.

Jodygirl

Bottom line is if you run you face a LIFETIME of looking over your shoulder. I f you go to another country AND don't get extradited you can't come back. There is NO statute of limitation on fleeing prosecution, and they will find you guilty in absentia! Better to get into some form of recovery. My experience as an SO is that most people just want to know that you understand the wrong you did and that you're taking active, agressive steps to not repeat. Many wont look close enough to make any distinction. But most will if you're open and emotionally straigt up with them.

I think running will only delay the inevitable. If you don't go now they will almost certainly catch you later. Can you imagine starting a new family, getting comfortable and then getting caught? Best to go thru hell once and get it over with, than to expect it for the rest of your life.

I believe this is a hard decesion. I do not beleive anyone can make the chice for you. I agree with fedex and jodygirl.
which makes it a hard hard decesion.

laws R Us sounds truly insightful.


Since you are a going in as an SO. New Laws have almost made this a life sentence. registration, internet phot galleries etc.

10 years is a long time.

Choose your decesion carefully. If you choose to do your time
ask for PC if safety is your true concern.

If you choose to run do it with a plan.

best of luck in such as rough decsion

I am in the same camp as Jodysgirl. They would have to hunt me down & drag me back, but I have no illusions that they would find me. It all depends on what your looking at by running. Are you looking at never getting caught & doing your time? Then like David said it will be expensive, you will have to give up your life, family, & friends, & leave the country. Even then there is no guarentee. If your just looking at putting it off for as long as you can so you can have fun before they get you, then take off. The main problem with this is the chances of picking up new charges while on the run. I have ran everytime I had a chance. It is extreamly stressful. Even a traffic stop can be the end of everything. All it takes is for any reason a cop walks up & says "Can I see some ID". Also you can never let anyone know anything, because they will rat you off, this even means your girlfriend, best friend etc. Believe me the people you think wouldn't turn you in are exactly the ones who will. They have their reasons which are good & valid reasons usually. The bottom line is you will get caught eventually. So for a short term run I see no problem, but for a long term run, it's not worth it.---Ken

I would have to agree with David. I've done both and he could not have said it any better. Sherry

its sas that some people want to run from what they did.my hubby is in jail right now.he may be looking at some prison time.i would rather him go spend his time so he can get out and be with me and his daughter the rest of his life.he may get alot of time too

I have to agree with everyone else on what has been said. Even though you are scared things will be alot better by facing it and doing what is required of you to do. I have never been to jail or prison I do know that running can be more harmful than excepting the consequences no matter what they are. Face everything and recover or F*** every thing and run the choice will be yours but if I were in your shoes I would face it and recover. Just my 2 cents. Good Luck and keep us posted okay.

I wouldnt want to be in your shoes its easy to say do the time dont know what i would do really its a really hard decision gish i wouldnt want to go to prison but i know that no matter where you would go they will find you gosh i feel bad for you really we all make mistakes thats part of being human and sometimes we have to make bad decisions to keep going whatever you do we will keep you in our thoughts and prayers here at pto...hugs, JER

I was thinking about him the other day, wondering what ever hapen.

Originally posted by Kconnor56
Also you can never let anyone know anything, because they will rat you off, this even means your girlfriend, best friend etc. Believe me the people you think wouldn't turn you in are exactly the ones who will. They have their reasons which are good & valid reasons usually. The bottom line is you will get caught eventually. So for a short term run I see no problem, but for a long term run, it's not worth it.---Ken

You said that right.. Especially the disgruntled girlfriends.. (my case)

Yeah, we'd love to hear from him, on the run or whatever.

SAS633
YOU SAID YOU HAD NEVER BEEN IN TROUBLE WITH THE LAW BEFORE THIS TIME. WELL THIS IS ALL NEW TO YOU, AND AS I HAVE HEARD YOU REALLY HAVE TO KNOW THE ROPES OUT THERE TO BE ABLE TO SWING THE RIGHT WAY. I HAVE NEVER BEEN IN TROUBLE WITH THE LAW, BUT I HAVE A SON IN TDC NOW FOR A DWI, HE THOUGHT ABOUT RUNNING, AND THEN HE THOUGHT ABOUT ME AND HIS DAD, WE ARE GETTING UP IN AGE NOW, AND HE KNEW HE COULD NOT COME HOME AND SEE US WHEN HE WANTED TO, MIGHT BE A LONG TIME BEFORE HE SAW US AGAIN, MAYBE NEVER. SO HE THOUGHT HE WOULD JUST GO AND DO HIS TIME SO HE COULD COME HOME TO US WHEN HE GOT OUT. AND HE ALSO KNEW THAT THIS WOULD CAUSE A LOT OF STRESS AND WORRY ON US. ESPECIALLY ME HIS MOM, WE ARE VERY CLOSE AND HE KNEW I COULD NOT LIVE THAT KIND OF LIFE, NOT KNOWING WHERE HE WAS, IF HE HAD SOMETHING TO EAT, A PLACE TO KEEP WARM AND SLEEP, SO HE KNEW WHAT HE HAD TO DO, HE HAD TO GO AND DO HIS TIME, MAINLY FOR HIS MOM AND DAD, SO WE COULD COME AND VISIT HIM AND HE COULD SEE US ALSO. HE IS DOING 5 YEARS, HAS BEEN IN 2 YRS 6 MONTHS NOW AND I AM HAVING A HARD TIME WITH IT, EVEN THOU I GO SEE HIM EVERY WEEKEND, I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT I WOULD HAVE DONE IF HE HAD MADE THE DECIESION TO RUN. SO IF YOU HAVE A FAMILY, THINK ABOUT THEM, WHEN SOMEONE GOES TO PRISON, THEY DO THEIR TIME, BUT THEIR LOVED ONES DO THEIR TIME ALSO. SO SEARCH YOUR HEART AND SOUL AND GOD WILL HELP YOU MAKE THE RIGHT CHOICE IF YOU ASK HIM. YOU DO HAVE A CHOICE AND IT IS YOUR CHOICE TO MAKE, BUT IT WILL BE A LONG, HARD, LONESOME, ROAD WITHOUT AN END TO TRAVEL, IT WILL BE A ROAD THAT WILL GO ON AND ON AND A LIFE WITHOUT A REAL LIFE. SO GOOD LUCK WITH YOUR CHOICE AND MAY GOD WRAP HIS ARMS AROUND YOU AND PROTECT YOU DURING THIS STRETCH OF ROAD IN YOUR LIFE. IT WILL GET BETTER IF YOU STAY AND FACE THE MUSIC BECAUSE IF YOU RUN YOU MIGHT NEVER HEAR THE MUSIC AGAIN. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY.

Yea, I'd like to hear an update here. Does anyone know anything?

No, I gave him my address in PM, which iknow unless you memorize it, then he wont have it, but I did give it. I do wish i knew how he is.

I know whats going on. He either ran, or he went to prison. If he ran, he is either still free & on the run, or has been caught, & is locked up. See, I'm pretty good at finding this stuff out, lol.--------------Ken

Hi sasquatch633 and welcome to PTO! I can't give you any "tips" on running away. But I can offer a few that may help you adjust. My brother just started his sentence as a SO. He had several months out on bail between arrest and sentencing. He immediatly found a good Sex Offender program and had an intensive evaluation and began group and individual therapy. This helped him tremendously in coming to terms with doing his time, and more importantly, it is helping him to understand "WHY" it happened in the first place. Also we spent time with some pastors that worked in different prisons and we talked to some ex inmates. Most of the guys in his sex offender class had spent time in prison and they were very helpful to him, and to all of us. If you are a sex offender, you do need to get some help and the sooner the better. ANY COUNSELING By a qualified SO counselor before prison WILL HELP YOU as a person, and it may also help you at sentencing - the fact that you sought help on your own, without a court order. I hope you make the decision to face up to your mistake and get help. There are some great SO counselors out there and don't forget that there are alot of people at PTO who will support you through this. Take Care and Stay Strong -Jade