THIS IS MY PROBLEM. I GOT A LETTER FROM MY SON THE 14TH. SAYING HE JUST GOT BACK INTO A REGULAR CELL AND SAID HE HAD A GOOD CELLY! NOW I GET A LETTER THE 18TH. ASKING ME TO CALL TO TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT PUTTING HIM BACK IN A CELL BY HIS SELF CAUSE HE IS HAVING TROUBLE AND IS SCARED. I JUST CALLED FERGUSON UNIT ABOUT 3 WEEKS AGO AND E-MAILED SOMEONE. ANYWAY I WROTE HIM BACK AND TOLD HIM TO WRITE AND TELL ME WHAT THE PROBLEM IS! MY SON IS KEEPING MY NERVES ALL TORE UP!!!!!! I DONT THINK THE PRISON DOESNT CARE WHAT I HAVE TO SAY! SO ANY ADVICE? THANKS, SHERRON :fb:

SHERRON:

HONEY, I SINCERELY KNOW WHAT YOU ARE FEELING AND GOING THROUGH. I HAVE BEEN THERE AND DONE THAT. DON'T CALL THE PRISON. IT WILL ONLY CAUSE HIM MORE PROBLEMS IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS. HE MUST LEARN HOW TO DEAL WITH HIS LIFE IN PRISON. IF HE IS THOUGHT OF THE BE A SNITCH, THEN THE INMATES WILL REALLY TURN ON HIM AND HE WILL HAVE SOME REAL PROBLEMS. SOMETIMES THEY HAVE TO GROW UP FAST IN PRISON. IT IS VERY HARD ON MOTHER TOO. YOU WANT TO HOLD THEM AND KISS THEM AND TAKE THE PAIN AWAY BUT YOU CANNOT DO THAT. IN SERIOUS SITUATIONS, YOU CAN CALL THE SUPERINTENDANT OR WARDEN AND HE SOMETIMES WILL HELP, BUT THIS SOUNDS LIKE MORE OF A PERSONALITY CLASH. HE NEEDS TO LET THIS GUY KNOW THAT HE WILL NOT BE RAN OVER. ALSO, EVEN THO HE IS IN A 2 BUNK AREA, HE CAN STILL STAY TO HIMSELF A LOT. THINGS WILL WORK OUT IN TIME FOR THE TWO OF THEM.

REMEMBER TO SHERRON, YOU DID NOT PUT HIM THERE. DECISIONS HE MADE DID THAT. I KNOW YOU HURT FOR HIM, BUT YOU CANNOT CHANGE THE SITUATION. IF HE WILL ACCEPT WHAT HAS HAPPENED AND GO ON WITH HIS LIFE, THEN HE WILL SETTLE IN AND THINGS WILL NOT BE AS HARD ON HIM. BUTCH WAS THE VERY SAME WAY THE FIRST YEARS OR SO, THEN HE REALIZED THAT HE HAD TO DEAL WITH HIS LIVING CONDITIONS HIMSELF. THERE WAS NOTHING I COULD DO.

MY PRAYERS AND LOVE TO YOU

DONNA

Sherron,

Do I ever know the feeling of being helpless. Thier have been times that I've wanted to go down to this jail and do anything to try to protect my son. But I have slowly learned that most things concerning this mess are completely out of my hands. I pray alot and then pray some more. Good luck to you and your son. You will be in my prayers.

God Bless,
Annie

donna is right. there is not much you can do, i am afraid that is part of prison life,, me and my man works woth the young that comes into the prison unit, if you would like us to help him, please pm me or email me and i will let you know what it is we try to do,,

lulu

lulu66@netwest.com

THANKS DONNA AND EVERYONE ELSE!! I WAS THINKING LIKE YOU WERE THINKING. BUT IN MY MIND, HES STILL MY LITTLE BOY! IT SEEMS LIKE HERE LATELY, HE THINKS I CAN TAKE CARE OF HIS PROBLEMS AND HE IS GONNA HAVE TO REALIZE HE IS THE ONE THAT HAS TO DO IT!! SHERRON

The only "problem" you have is that you love him. Your right he has to learn to deal with his own problems. Prison is a hell of a place to grow up. My son was sentenced at 16yrs old to a YO prison he's served about 16mos now. It's been hell on him and us as well. Your in my prayers. Peace. cheryl

Oh what a worry. I worry so much that my son is having problems like that but everyone is right, the best thing for you to do is let him handle it himself. It is so upsetting, but you are all right that they have to learn how to handle jail life by themselves. My son being in there and thinking what may be going on is enough to make me feel insane. It is so out of our hands and that is so scary. I am so tired of crying about this situation. Please know I am thinking of all of you.

hugs
nancy

God Bless Us Moms!!!!

I KNOW THATS RIGHT, VALERIE!!!!!! SHERRON

Sherron

I completely agree with Donna !!! You are here to love and support him. You are here to listen to him, and give him your point of view on certain things. You are here to visit him, and ask people to send him B-day postcards ! :) But you are not here to deal with his life in prison !! First of all, I think it could bring him additionnal problems if you ever called the prison !! As Donna said, he could get harder problems being considered a snitcher, or "the boy calling his mom for help" !!
He's responsible for his present situation, and has to cope with it. Sherron, facing problems, people you don't like, scary situations etc is today's life for EVERYBODY, whether you're in prison or not !! Most of the time, even if you ask support from your loved ones, you have to handle your problems by yourself. This is true for your son too. It might be hard for him at the beginning, but over the years he will manage to succeed, and will get respect from others, and more important, will get self assurance, mental strength and self esteem !
Sherron, think that besides being a loving and caring mother, you're also a woman and have your own life to fullfil. So think of you at times ! :)
All the best for you and your son
Philippe

I think it is natural for our children to turn to us for help. I encourage my son to share his hopes, fears and struggles. Unfortunately the system punishes inmates and parents who try to take a proactive approach. While we can not fix things for our children, we must continue to let them share their feelings. The prison culture is not like the outside world. This is a place where acts of kindness may be viewed as weakness. Rather than trying to get the institution involved, I liked your idea of trying to get more information from your son. If he could identify the problems and provide more details, maybe you guys could come up with a couple of different approaches he could use. Sometimes just feeling like you have a plan can help.

Yes Mom, Always share things with your sons, If you don't who will? You and other family and friends are the only contact they have with the outside world. If you want them to continue to have morals or values at all, we must keep in constant touch at all times. But, then too, they must be responsible for their lives, just as they will be when they get out of there and come home.

My love
Donna

Sherron, I agree with the other ladies, I know when Odie got there he was tested every where he's been sent to, I think the inmates want to "test" the new guys to see if they can or will stand up to whoever it is doing the harassment, Odie so far has, and from the stories he tells me, tho That part (for now has dwindled to almost nonexistant). Odie just simply bucks up to them, that's what some of them are looking for, and they want to know who they can bully and who to leave along. Odie has never gotten into a physical confrontation, and it seems for the most part after he makes his stand known that they (the bully & your loved one) become friends!! Just my input for whatever it's worth!! Carla

Sherron... what Donna said in her first reply 'hit the nail on the head'. You don't want to do anything to 'give him a bad name' with the other inmates. Just keep on loving and supporting him, that's about all you can do right now. I know it's hard, but you have to accept things/situations how they are right now.

Jodygirl