:hee: Hi Everbody!

I just want to vent a little about my visit with the Hubbie. I visit him by myself this weekend and I felt strange. Ya know, I felt arkward becaus I want him to come home and I know he can't and he was touching me in private places. I felt strange because I have'nt been touched since 11/2002. He was like whats a matter. I'm like, it feels funny. Not sexy, just funny and strange. I think I hurt hus feelings. I just wanted to cry but was strong until I left. I love the Hubbie Bear with all my heart and we are best of friends. Can anybody tell me why I felt so strange? Do any of you get that feeling? Shish!!!! :o

Until my husband got locked up for over 10 years, I would have thought you were insane to say that. :)

Now that the shoe is on MY foot, I can totally relate. I have always been a very sexual person who likes to be touched. Now it feels weird and takes me a lot of time to "ease" into it. Luckily, I told him about it, so he's cool. It was funny because he used to be that way...being locked up for so long with no outside connections will do that to a person. :)

We have family visits every 90 days and I can't just jump into bed with him. I was NEVER like that before, but when I've conditioned myself to this life, I can't just get "into" quickly anymore. How sad is prison??????? :)
Wendy

Hi to you all, I was just reading the post about feeling funny about him touching you. Down here in Oklahoma we dont get conjugal visits at all even if your married. So I take ad***tage of every touch or kiss or hug that we can get away with. We have to visit in a room full of other people, kids, and guards. But we do the best we can. My hubby has 8 more years until his next parole hearing. We are both very affectionate and love sex. If I did'nt get the affection from him once a month I would be very unhappy but I would cope if I had to. But he stays on level 4 so he can get his good days. But if we could get conjugal visits I would probably feel funny too! Especially knowing that everyone would know what was going on in there, but I would do it for him if we could. I have to settle for just the kisses and touches when we can. I hope your next visit goes well. Good luck! :)

Well, I just got back from Jersey and it was mixed. I've only seen him twice since 93, once in October, and then March 14 and 15. They've still refused to put me on the regular list, because of my record. So I wasn't ( of course) in the computer, and we had to wait for them to fix it, so that really made us both an emotional mess. It was strange, neither of us had kissed anyone in a decade. I would have let him touch me more, but it was hard, for both of us. Plus I've been in joint and I don't exactly relax. I have to really try hard, and after, he called and said "Did I disapoint you in any way?" and that hurt. I think it's normal. I also think that it's not such an issue if you have regular visits, but many of us don't. We are all dealing with others watching and not having the privacy we really need to reconnect. It ain't easy but they are worth it.

i get my trailer visits and on the visit we do touch each other but when it is empty... not when kids are around. .. i feel funny then.

:hee: Thanks a bunch to all who relpied. At first I thought something was wrong with me. He was like, "What's wrong with you!" I was suspended in a time warp. I'm gonna talk to him in depth about it so he won't feel like I don't want him no more. I love my Hubbie til death due us part and then after that too. So, I wonder how it's gonna be after he gets out in 10 years. Will I be worser or will we just blend like it's nothing to it? :confused: I pray that we will be alright. He's my world. Thanks again.

I have a feeling it will only get worse over time. But I'm sure it will be fun trying to figure it all out, ya know? It's kind of like your real first time...all awkward and silly-feeling, because you've both anticipated it for so long. But when there's real love there and good communication, that will pass and the sex will eventually get to a place that's all good. :)
Wendy