im in need of some--any advice on what to do when your powerless over the madness that came when you hooked up with someone that violated parole and
now he's gone?? im not pointing finger's here-but we all saw it coming.he violated
parole and i was told he was going to santa rita-- 1.5 weeks later-i found out that he's in san quentin.i had a visit scheduled when he was on a hold(?) in
santa cruz jail-the day of scheduled visit i had my follow up appt w/my cancer doctor that am and found out my cancer has returned,so,no,i was not able to see him then or now.ive written gazillions of letters to him-what does one do-besides next to nothing(have no choice,right?) on getting word to him that all is not well?
life as i knew it no longer exists--im so afraid of so much stuff now.
we were in the middle of trying to relocate here in the so.bay-yep,we sure did give our 30 day notice(his idea)-and now?? i have to be out by this coming sat-landlady allready rented this box @ $1800 per month(thats what we have been paying all along)so thats why my life is no longer--i have to go into hospital w/scheduled surgery in 1 week for my cancer-i have 2 children by the way-this truly suck's.thanks for your time.

I just want to welcome you to pto... it must be hard facing so many hardships all at once. I hope your surgery goes well. You will find lots of support and good information here.

What's next, about all I can say is take a deep breath and think postive and not
let all of this violation stuff consume all of your time. Stress is the #1 factor of having
your cancer return. I should know as I have ovarian cancer, and when my husband went back in to prison to san quentin once being in remission for 19 months, WHAM!!
it all returned from the stress of being out here on my own. Like I tell everyone here
at the san quentin forum, mail going in takes 7-14 days to get to him, mail coming out
takes 1-2 days depending on where you reside. If you really need to contact him with
this type of news, I have told many people to send a letter overnight express. He will
get it the next day, overnight express goes first to the inmates instead of regular or
priority mail. Priority mail is the same as regular mail. If it is a holiday like Father's Day
coming up here in June, mail can take 3 weeks to get to him. I don't know if your boyfriend has writting material and pens or stamps, so I would suggest that you send
him 2 clear see through pens, black or blue, a writing tablet, one that is not wire bound
and 5 books of stamps per envelope. And if nessassary prestamped envelopes that you
can get from the post office. DO NOT SELF ADDRESS, as the prison will make him send
them back to you. If you feel that this is a very delicate situation then I would suggest
that you call the prison, 415-454-1460 and ask to speak to a pastor and tell him to
ask if your loved one can call home, they do this in emergency situations. I hope that
this information will be of some help to you, in the meantime, my thoughts and prayers
are with you and your children, and the surgery that you will be going through. All of
us here at PTO welcome you to this wonderful community of support, and concern.
Suzi