09-08-2010, 08:33 PM
i miss my man so bad and he hasnt even gotten sentenced yet. im in this for the long haul and i will stay by him no matter what but sometimes it just gets so hard there are days i dont even know what to do. sometimes ill come home and i miss him so much i just sit on the couch and ball my eyes out cuz i would do anything in the world to have him right there, to just touch him let alone kiss him would mean the WORLD to me. i know everyone else feels this way i just need some advice and words of encouragement cuz im feeling really down. hes my best friend in the whole entire world and its killing me not to be with him. hes lookin at some time and im willing to do it i just wish i could fast forward life and have him back here with me right now.(i know all us girls wish that!) any advice on what to do between the 2 of us so it doesnt seem so bad like little games or anything we can do i know some people have mentioned some things through the mail just anything or any words of encouragement sure would help right now. its so hard not to have the love of your life laying right next to you or doing things like always ....i try not to think of things that make me sad so i can stay strong...i just wanna be so strong for him so he feels encouraged and that he can get through this cuz i wanna grow old with him! any advice or words would be good! thanks ladies!!:mail:
09-09-2010, 10:25 AM
Try not to focus too much on being without him. Focus on when you will see him again. That's what gets me through. Keep yourself busy too. My husband has been away 16 months already and its honestly flown by. There are times that are harder than others but I remember that he will be home again and I think about things we can do when he gets home. Or I also think about the good times we had and just remind myself that all of this is only making us stronger as a couple.
You can do it...just don't let yourself be too overwhelmed. Be patient and be strong.
09-09-2010, 10:42 AM
It hurt me really bad when my baby got sentence, he was in the county jail for about 3.5 months I cried the first time I went to visit him because I was missing him the first day. It hurt even more when he got his time I was at EVERY court appearance. I would just tell you to stay strong my baby didn't want to see me cry because he didn't think I would do this bid with him he might have thought I was going to brake bad on him, he thought I wouldn't be strong enough. Be strong girl I know it's hard, but write him every day, go to every court appearance and make sure your at every visit if you can. Show him that your going to stand behind him know matter what. He needs your support now more then ever. They have a lot to think about while their in jail and a lot might be going through his head, just stay strong for him and keep you sanity for you...I tell my baby in every letter "it's easy being faithful to you because I love you just that much." I will never cheat on my boo and I will never leave his side know matter what. Hope this helps:)
09-09-2010, 10:58 AM
This sounds like me in the beginning i laid with his shirt he wore last with his scent crying night and day. All i could do was think about him and missing him so bad. Every where i looked there was his face and i would break down. It took building up strength in myself to get to where i am now. Not thinking about what i miss but what is to come.The very first visit although behind glass i didnt think i was going to get through it but i did. He has been gone 1 year now and it never gets easier to handle just easier to deal with through strength and courage. I focus on encouraging him and keeping his spirits up cause him being happy makes me happy.I also find strength in knowing i am not alone there are people out there who understand and it helps to talk to someone and read other peoples stories. Everyone has to find thier own way to cope and get through the days this is just how i get through mine.
09-09-2010, 11:18 AM
Awww....it will be okay. Try to keep yourself busy and time will go by so fast. If you just sit and wait, it will seem to drag by. I am in it for the long haul too. A year has passed already, and it doesn't seem like it. Hugs to you. If you ever need to talk, feel free to PM me anytime!!
09-09-2010, 11:35 AM
The beginning is always the hardest and the unknown is scary. You will feel much better when sentencing happens. You are scared and relieved all at the same time. My husband has been gone for 9 mo now with along way to go unless his sentenced gets reduced. Keep your head high!! You are stronger than you think. We are always here for you. We all know how you feel. Keep yourself busy, and the time will fly by. Stay strong. You are stronger than you think, rely on your inner strength. Best of wishes to you.
09-09-2010, 11:57 AM
I am in the same boat as you hisangel, we just hit the 3 month mark and are still waiting on sentencing. I miss him so much everyday, but the way I deal with it is to visit him as much as possible, write him all the time, and not focus on what could happen(that will drive you crazy). I try to get my mind off of it as much a possible but that never works for very long. I just keep hopeful and pray that this all ends and that he will be back home very soon.
09-10-2010, 01:03 AM
I'm definitely in the same boat as well. It's been about 3 months now since my boyfriend was arrested and he should be sentenced sometime late next week. The worst part is since he's been arrested I found out that I'm pregnant with our first child. It's been extremely hard and I find that some days go by much faster than others. I sat at work today and wrote him a letter about everything we'd do when he got home and how much stronger this has made us. You have to be strong for you and strong for him as well. I broke down in visit this past week and cried for almost the full 2 hours, it hurt him so much to see me like that knowing that he couldn't do anything about it. So my advice is cry at home, try to keep your time together, your calls, and your letters positive because it'll only keep him positive as well. Time always goes by faster and easier when you look at the positives. But when you are at home a good cry is a necessity some days. Like I've said, I did it a lot in the beginning and definitely a lot this past week but whenever he's listening/watching I perk up and remind him of all the wonderful things in life whether it be the past, present, or future. That's all you can do. And when the "sticking around" dicussion comes up I just remind him of how easy it would have been to leave him the day he was arrested and how I've stuck out the first 3 months and it'll only get easier. Sadly it's an adjustment period that we all go through but once you get the hang of it, it will be much easier to function. I'm depressed constantly and am always thinking about him and feeling guilty for being on the outside living my life but I get up every morning and think of the days, weeks, months, and years ahead that we will share and the amazing things we've already acheived. So stay strong and just get through another day, that's all any of us can do. Soon enough those days will turn to weeks and we'll be back in their arms just like before.