Just wanted to let everyone know the warden denied our wedding two days before our date.After we went through all the headaches and got the blood tests and I even made a special trip down to Helena to but the license on the 1st. There reason was because we hadnt known each long enough and that we met since he was incarcarated and did'nt know each other on the outside. The chaplin said we could try again in a year from now. We have known each other since May of 2003. I dont see how they can say how we feel about each other. We are adults not children. Any advice would help. I am in Oklahoma. :pissed:

Sorry about your denial. I am sure you are heartbroken. But, remember that you don't need a piece of paper or a chaplain's blessing to love each other!
Good Luck to you and yours.

I don't really have any advice, but I'm so sorry that happened to you guys. I agree with supremom, the love is what matters not the piece of paper.

:fb: So sorry to hear your news.:fb:

Oh wow so sorry that happen to you. Man that had to be a blow since you were within two days. Why did they wait to tell you that late in the game? My man and I were getting married but they moved him far away. So we decided to wait until he gets out. EVen though we are not married on paper were are in our hearts and that will have to do for now.

((((hugs)))) I am sooo sorry to hear about this, I hope that you feel better soon. Everything takes time, it's always hurry up and wait, but have faith that things will change. It's always tough before it gets easy. Keep your head up!

My thoughts and prayers are with you!

((((((((hugs))))))))
I am so sorry. The DOC thinks that they can run peoples lives, it has nothing to do with them if you knew him 5 mins or 12 months, the love is still there. How hurt you must feel right now. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I just cant believe that they said this, love is love. Now they have the right to dictate who and when you can marry. Who gave them that power? I hope you get get some answers, and sort this out. You and your fiance deserve the happiness of marriage. I wish you both the best of luck

that is no business of the wardens to deny you about your love for each other. i would call the state officials and tell them what happen or the dept of corrections.
sorry.

((((((hugs))))))
I didn't know the Warden could do that!!
I would try talking tosomeone over the Warden....when you want something itnever comes easy fight for what you believe girl!!

GOOD LUCK!!!!!

(((HUGS))) I'm so sorry to hear about your bad news. What difference does it make to the warden how long you have known each other? I've never heard of that and I'm sure its not listed in DOC's rules of marring an inmate. At least nothing was stated when James and I filled out our paper work. Again I'm so very sorry for you. Luv and lots of (((HUGS))) Stay strong and everyone is right it matters more what you both feel not what a piece of paper states. Spikeswife

sheeesh, i am sorry, they were not kidding when they said that they lose all rights.
people out here can meet for a month and get married. my opinion it is all about control. what busness is it if one wants to marry an imate or now?

Well all my begging and pleading to the warden about letting us get married did'nt do any good at all. They still say we have to wait until next year and then the chaplin said he gave me his word it would go through. He said that the age difference did not even come up in the reconsideration. They still want to know if we will stick it out together until next year. They think that I will get tired of being alone and want to find another man, but I told them I had been a widow since 1987 and that I know what is is like to not have a man with me, and that as long as God lets me live on this earth that I wanted to spend it with Raymond and if it meant that he would have to be in there then so be it. God will be my husband until he is able to come home to me and God will sustain me until then. God will prevail in the end! :)

I am sorry aboul you being denied to marry your sweetie. But hang in there. A year will be over in a flash. I married my Hubbie while he was in county jail. We have been together three years before he got sent away. I am 20 years older than he is. They even had the neerve to mention that in his PSI report and I think the judge was mad at that. But hand on Honey. You'll be married in no time. Buy the way, what is the age difference between you and your Honey? I hope I am not being too nosey.

Dear "Bunnyrun, I am 14 years older than Raymond. He has always gone with older women in his past. His deceased common-law wife was 2 years older than me. She would have been 62 if she had lived. She died on Feb 14, 2002 and he did'nt even know it until he got a returned Christmas and New Years card that he had sent to her with it written on "She went to be with Jesus on this date" He was devastated. He thought he would never find love again and niether did I. That is one of the reasons we wanted to get married so I would have more rights, but our love will stand the test of time that they are imposing on us.He was with his other wife for 10 years, he was 34 and she was 58 when they met. At least she got to be with him before he was arrested in 1997. He does'nt come up for another parole hearing until June 2012. His last one was August 2001. I wish I could talk the Pardon and Parole Board into giving him an earlier parole review. I am going to try but I am told that I probably wont have any luck. Keeping the faith! :)

Honey bun... I am sorry that this happened, but i agree with everyone else here.. How did the DOC get such power, i will never understand, however, I must say that where my man is, several inmates have tried to get married, and they wont let them, the clergy there for them doesnt support inmate marriages, is what the one fellow was told when he inquired about it, yet on their DOC site in the inmate handbooks, it says something entirely diffrent, and says that inmate marriages are allowed, ... I just thought Id share that with you.... I hope things work out, but like all the others have said.. its a peice of paper, true love lays within your heart, and you dont need that paper for that to be there... but it certainly would be nice to have that paper anyway!

I would try to go over the warden's head. and also get support from his and your family

We are trying it again. But it seems everything will go through this time. I have just sent in my application for marriage to the chaplin. And our wedding date is set for Nov 19,2005. I have already bought our wedding bands. I am praying that the warden will sign off on our marriage this time. Be praying for ous! Thanks, Carol:)

hunny buns, Congratulations and I hope all goes well this time around you are in my thoughts and prayers. Let us know how every thing turns out. Once again congratulations!!!:heart:

:thumbsup: i am so sorry about ur wedding day dont get discourage , go for it again til u finally get it good luck