View Full Version : Would you accept a recycled engagement and/or wedding ring from your fiance?


esteli
05-21-2010, 10:31 AM
How would you feel if you found out that the ring your man gave you was originally purchased for someone else?

Say he got the ring back after his last engagement broke off, and he gave it to you. You somehow found out he bought it a few years ago for another, would you wear it? Would you be offended?

What if it was the other way around? Say you ended up with rings from an old boyfriend --- times are tough and these rings are gorgeous and expensive, would you take them in for a cleaning at the local jewelry store and bring them into your relationship now to be used as wedding rings?

Just wondering how much personal belief goes into rings and does it really affect the wearer.

My ex-husband bought our wedding rings at a pawn shop. They were beautiful and antique and it had a .75 carat diamond in a gorgeous cut. They were used by someone else (unknown to us) and obviously pawned and unclaimed so he bought them for me and I always loved it.

What are your thoughts, beliefs and superstitions about engagement and wedding rings?

MizSunshine
05-21-2010, 10:36 AM
I don't know.

I don't care about the rings being used, (from a pawnshop or something similar) but in 99.99999% of situations I don't think I would want to wear a ring my man bought for someone else. I'd rather have a cheap k-mart ring than that! But if it were his mother's ring, or another family member, or a pawnshop ring, etc, that wouldn't really bother me. If he had a ring leftover from a previous relationship, he can pawn that and go to Kmart and buy me something cheap, lol. The THOUGHT in the ring matters more to me than how much it cost, you know?

mikeswifey730
05-21-2010, 10:39 AM
Well first I wud wear something out of a gum ball machine from him. I'm not a materialistic person, however that being said I would never accept a ring that was meant for someone else. Every time u look down at it its going to be a reminder of that other person *puke*

Onaicult
05-21-2010, 10:43 AM
I have no issues w/ pawn store rings - but I don't know how I'd feel if a ring was picked out to someone else's esthetic, and then given to me. I am an extremely untraditional girl, and am not interested in a classic wedding ring anyways, so that probably wouldn't fly w/ me :) Personally, if I had a ring from an old boyfriend/husband, I would try to sell or pawn it, and get my husband/fiance/whatever something *he* really liked :) Good thread!

Funny story-slightly off topic :) My mom lost the wedding ring my dad got her, so she bought a replacement w/ a larger stone. He never noticed :p

Lorraine
05-21-2010, 10:44 AM
I wouldn't mind a "previous worn" ring if it was something passed down in his family or if he bought it from a pawn shop. But there's no way I would take any ring he originally bought for someone else. I don't care where he gets it from, I just want to be the only one he's bought that ring for.

crazycasey183
05-21-2010, 10:47 AM
I wouldn't wear a ring that he bought for someone else before me, I'm not a materialistic person I would just do without before I did that :)

nimuay
05-21-2010, 10:49 AM
I think that I'd wear anything offered, if I were that much into the relationship. I repurpose/recycle just about anything and everything.

I offered my about-to-be DIL my grandmother's ring (and the dumb broad had the lack of sense to turn it down - top quality sapphire surrounded by top-quality diamonds) so, lucky me, I still have it, (but not the DIL. lol)

LeBeau
05-21-2010, 10:52 AM
Pawn shop or estate sale jewelery, I'd have no problem with.
A family ring, I'd be very flattered by.
A ring once he once chose for someone else? Uh, no. I'd be open to the stone from such a ring being put into a new setting that was chosen for me, but I would not be comfortable with a ring he'd once put on someone else's hand.

A ring once given to me by another gentleman.... Uhm, how does that work? A lady returns the ring if an engagement is broken. I've returned 2 and a third ring, which was refused when I tried to return it (3 times over a two year period), was given to a mutual friend who wanted to propose but could not buy a ring right then. (I'm pleased to say that the couple will soon celebrate their 20th anniversary.)
The rings from my first marriage were given away- my engagement ring became a birthday gift to a dear friend's daughter (it was my birthstone, a citrine,flanked by two tiny diamonds and the young lady and I share the same birthstone) and the bands went on to serve a better suited couple.... So, no, I guess I would not bring the bridal jewelery from a past relationship into my current one.

NoOne1994
05-21-2010, 10:54 AM
Well first I wud wear something out of a gum ball machine from him. I'm not a materialistic person, however that being said I would never accept a ring that was meant for someone else. Every time u look down at it its going to be a reminder of that other person *puke*

Took the words right out of my mouth :)

The only recycled wedding ring I'd wear would be a family heirloom. I'd rather him make a ring out of tin foil or gum wrappers than wear one he purchased for someone else.

As far as me offering him a ring I purchased for someone else, I wouldn't do it personally. We would have to be a ring-less married couple until financial times got better.

While the ring doesn't make a marriage, its the principal behind it.

esteli
05-21-2010, 10:55 AM
I think that I'd wear anything offered, if I were that much into the relationship. I repurpose/recycle just about anything and everything.

I offered my about-to-be DIL my grandmother's ring (and the dumb broad had the lack of sense to turn it down - top quality sapphire surrounded by top-quality diamonds) so, lucky me, I still have it, (but not the DIL. lol)

This is how I feel about it. A gorgeous ring would def. catch my attention regardless of who it belonged to previously. I think of it as an object, a ring is just a thing.

xgot420issuesx
05-21-2010, 10:58 AM
How would you feel if you found out that the ring your man gave you was originally purchased for someone else?

Say he got the ring back after his last engagement broke off, and he gave it to you. You somehow found out he bought it a few years ago for another, would you wear it? Would you be offended?

No, I wouldn't wear it and yes I would be offended.

What if it was the other way around? Say you ended up with rings from an old boyfriend --- times are tough and these rings are gorgeous and expensive, would you take them in for a cleaning at the local jewelry store and bring them into your relationship now to be used as wedding rings?

o, I would never give him something that once held meaning between my EX and I. I think it would be disrespectful.

Just wondering how much personal belief goes into rings and does it really affect the wearer.

I do believe personal thought and feelings go into such a purchase. And if he were to give me the ring he gave his EX, I would be livid. It just doesn't sit well with me to think he would expect me to wear a ring he personally picked out for her with her in mind, and becasue it didn't work out, he gave it to me as an after thought. If he went through the trouble of buying her a new ring, he damn well better go through the trouble to do it for me also. Actually, consideration would be a much better word.

My ex-husband bought our wedding rings at a pawn shop. They were beautiful and antique and it had a .75 carat diamond in a gorgeous cut. They were used by someone else (unknown to us) and obviously pawned and unclaimed so he bought them for me and I always loved it.

As for if he were to buy me a ring from a pawn shop, that is different. That ring would only have been meant for me, not every girl he was with that it didn't work out with.
When purchasing something from a pawn shop, to you it is brand new. You didn't know the other woman who owned it, he had no personal relationship with the former owner, so it is just different.

What are your thoughts, beliefs and superstitions about engagement and wedding rings?

I found out, not by snooping either, by pure accident, how much he paid for his EX's ring and I will say this, he paid a pretty penny for it, so I would imagine it was a pretty decent size diamond. I know he bought it from a very reputable jeweler also. I will say, the thought crossed my mind that if he spent that much on her, he damn well have better spent that much on me. But that thought quickly faded. I really do not care how much he spent, that is NOT what matters, what matters is the meaning and the commitment and the love behind it. More money doesn't equal more love.

I also do know why he bought her a ring and it was for ALL the WRONG reasons. He was 17 and VERY naive. But I still wouldn't want that ring.

esteli
05-21-2010, 11:11 AM
Pawn shop or estate sale jewelery, I'd have no problem with.
A family ring, I'd be very flattered by.
A ring once he once chose for someone else? Uh, no. I'd be open to the stone from such a ring being put into a new setting that was chosen for me, but I would not be comfortable with a ring he'd once put on someone else's hand.


Interesting that you would be open to a stone from another ring.
One of my ex-s offered it once to me from a ring his late wife wore. I was freaked out because she was dead. I thought she might haunt me. But now that I think about it, maybe I was being silly.


A ring once given to me by another gentleman.... Uhm, how does that work?

I meant wedding rings rather than the engagement ring you are suppose to give back.

MizSunshine
05-21-2010, 11:11 AM
A ring once given to me by another gentleman.... Uhm, how does that work? A lady returns the ring if an engagement is broken.

Not if the lady bought it herself. My ex and I cohabitated and I put him through school, therefore I purchased the ring after we became engaged. Why in the world would I return the ring to him? Hehe

LeBeau
05-21-2010, 11:16 AM
Not if the lady bought it herself. My ex and I cohabitated and I put him through school, therefore I purchased the ring after we became engaged. Why in the world would I return the ring to him? Hehe

Then he never gave you an engagement ring. An engagement ring is, traditionally, a gift given in contemplation of marriage and in my admittedly old fashioned view, it's impossible to buy yourself an engagement ring... what you had was a piece of personal jewelery that was yours and yours alone from start to finish.

Hugaboom
05-21-2010, 11:19 AM
I agree with the masses. Pawn shop rings don't bother me so much but if he even attempted to give me a ring he'd originally bought for someone else . . . :nono:

My old wedding ring was/is a stinker. I'm going to get the diamonds remade into something perhaps a pendant. But then I considered whether or not I'd want to wear a constant reminder of that part of my life. I think not. Likely our daughter will get the diamonds in a piece for her. She would appreciate it more.

mikeswifey730
05-21-2010, 11:27 AM
Took the words right out of my mouth :)

The only recycled wedding ring I'd wear would be a family heirloom. I'd rather him make a ring out of tin foil or gum wrappers than wear one he purchased for someone else.

As far as me offering him a ring I purchased for someone else, I wouldn't do it personally. We would have to be a ring-less married couple until financial times got better.

While the ring doesn't make a marriage, its the principal behind it.

Yes exactly!! Gum wrapper my finger up! I betcha I wud rock the hell outta that thing too!! Tin foil wit some rhinestones whaaaa!! Lol

LeBeau
05-21-2010, 11:34 AM
Interesting that you would be open to a stone from another ring.
One of my ex-s offered it once to me from a ring his late wife wore. I was freaked out because she was dead. I thought she might haunt me. But now that I think about it, maybe I was being silly.



I meant wedding rings rather than the engagement ring you are suppose to give back.

For me, it's the setting that defines the ring,that's what makes the ring special and unique. A stone looks totally different depending on how it is set, so to me, a new setting IS a whole new ring.

(And to clarify, or maybe muddy up, a prior comment, I don't have a clue how best to handle bridal jewelery purchased with shared funds... Anything I say about engagement rings is with the assumption that the ring was purchased by the gentleman alone... and it's my feeling that heirloom rings should go back where they came from if the relationship fails, whether before marriage or after))

NoOne1994
05-21-2010, 11:50 AM
For me, it's the setting that defines the ring,that's what makes the ring special and unique. A stone looks totally different depending on how it is set, so to me, a new setting IS a whole new ring.

(And to clarify, or maybe muddy up, a prior comment, I don't have a clue how best to handle bridal jewelery purchased with shared funds... Anything I say about engagement rings is with the assumption that the ring was purchased by the gentleman alone... and it's my feeling that heirloom rings should go back where they came from if the relationship fails, whether before marriage or after))

Not to change the thread, but I worked in a jewelry store for a number of years and the consensus among the long time jewelry sales personnel was that the marquise diamond cuts were the kiss of death for any marriage. All the sales people would feel so sorry for a bride-to-be when she left the store with that stone. Underground jewelry store urban legends? Probably :)

MizSunshine
05-21-2010, 12:19 PM
Then he never gave you an engagement ring. An engagement ring is, traditionally, a gift given in contemplation of marriage and in my admittedly old fashioned view, it's impossible to buy yourself an engagement ring... what you had was a piece of personal jewelery that was yours and yours alone from start to finish.

No, sorry. It was an engagement ring - a symbol on my hand that I was engaged and promised to marry my ex. My relationships are give and take. I put him through school, so we chose my ring together after he proposed to me, and since I was the current breadwinner, it was technically my paycheck.

Onaicult
05-21-2010, 12:23 PM
Not to change the thread, but I worked in a jewelry store for a number of years and the consensus among the long time jewelry sales personnel was that the marquise diamond cuts were the kiss of death for any marriage. All the sales people would feel so sorry for a bride-to-be when she left the store with that stone. Underground jewelry store urban legends? Probably :)

We are picking out rings sometime soon, so that is good to know! lol, I've never been drawn to that shape, but now I will definitely steer clear lol :thumbsup:

AliCat3
05-21-2010, 01:25 PM
Well I am very materialistic. I have a specific ring that I want. Chances that he got the same ring I want is slim to none. He never bought a ring for his ex's. This is something that I would be wearing for te rest of my life. It symbolizes us as one and the love we have for each other. I want to look at it and smile, not think of the other chick.

$Mrs.Chavez$
05-21-2010, 01:27 PM
I would be piss...i dont want another woman ring on my finger...were nothing alike...better get me something else! but...i know my husband wasn't that dumb...he brought me to the jewelers and said pick anyone! today is your day...lol very sweet...

WaitingOnEddie
05-21-2010, 01:33 PM
If it were from a pawnshop or something...I wouldn't care.

But if he had originally bought the ring for someone else...hmmmm...yeah...i'd have issues with that. I don't want to be wearing his ex-wife's ring...I want my own.

Re-gifting is a no-no for me.

Val912
05-21-2010, 01:35 PM
Personally if you dont know where they come from then it doesnt matter. I wouldnt wear it because im supersticious and well if the previous owners pawned their ring its probably because they got divorced and i dont want that bad luck!!! :(

But if he had a ring from another female he had bought it for oh no buddy i wish i would wear some other broads ring. And i dont think i would even want to marry him if he presented it to me with that back story bc no.

But i got a brand new ring he picked it out himself, a bridal set 2 carats engagement diamond princess cut with diamonds on the side and the wedding band was 1 carat in total the diamonds were all around in YELLOW gold its filppin ugly :( but i wore it with pride cus he picked it out.

esteli
05-21-2010, 01:40 PM
Personally if you dont know where they come from then it doesnt matter. I wouldnt wear it because im supersticious and well if the previous owners pawned their ring its probably because they got divorced and i dont want that bad luck!!! :(

But if he had a ring from another female he had bought it for oh no buddy i wish i would wear some other broads ring. And i dont think i would even want to marry him if he presented it to me with that back story bc no.

But i got a brand new ring he picked it out himself, a bridal set 2 carats engagement diamond princess cut with diamonds on the side and the wedding band was 1 carat in total the diamonds were all around in YELLOW gold its filppin ugly :( but i wore it with pride cus he picked it out.

This is exactly what I was curious about, if people had superstitions that a ring in a pawnshop obviously they must of gotten divorced and therefore would bring on bad luck.

:thumbsup: thanks for your responses

PTO-110524
05-21-2010, 01:40 PM
I see two issues here.

One is the issue of it being the ring he picked out and bought for someone else. Absolutely not! :nono: .

Second is his dishonesty in not saying it was for his ex. I'd be highly upset to learn the ring I thought he'd picked just for me had in fact lived on some other woman's hand and he didn't say so.

Family heirloom would be okay, but I wouldn't really want a second-hand pawn shop ring either. :p

retired - 666
05-21-2010, 01:43 PM
What if it was the other way around? Say you ended up with rings from an old boyfriend --- times are tough and these rings are gorgeous and expensive, would you take them in for a cleaning at the local jewelry store and bring them into your relationship now to be used as wedding rings?


I did just that...I didnt tell him though. Money is just too tight these days.

NY-Done
05-21-2010, 01:47 PM
Awww, the infamous pawn shop -- alot of that jewelry is stolen from friends and family by an addict and then sold to pawn shops, this is why some of that stuff is never picked up.

I like nice pieces, if it's a nice piece, I'd love it. If it's ugly, because I don't care for ugly pieces, I wouldn't like it. Where it came from would not matter, I wouldn't even ask him because my take is it's none of my business, just accept the ring and appreciate his efforts.

esteli
05-21-2010, 01:51 PM
I did just that...I didnt tell him though. Money is just too tight these days.

A ring is a ring is a ring especially during hard economic times. I don't see how it would affect the relationship. But this is my new thinking since I've come to see material things as just that.

Wobabi
05-21-2010, 01:53 PM
,,,,I am going to take that 4 carat ring and dip it in platinum and slap it right on my finger!!!!!

114644sLuvnWife
05-21-2010, 04:41 PM
Well when my husband purposed to me, he did it rather spontaniously, and neither of us really had alot of money, so there was no ring, and the next day he was arrested. I used an old ring that he gave me a couple years back (he gave it to me 1 because he thought that it was bad ass and that I would love it, and 2 because it didn't fit him because it was too big) as the engagement ring, and when we got married he was in prison so I went out and bought a couple of stainless steel rings that matched for us, they had two spider webs on um and a spider in the middle of the webs... sure it wasn't high class or nothin, but it fit us... I still love me ring, and brag about it everywhere. I've even had a few of my friends make me show their friends/parents because they think that its that cool.
To me it's not so much the ring that matters, it matters where my heart is... and my heart is forever with him, my soul is connected to his, and my life is entertwined with his... thats all I will ever ask for, because he is my everything.

chelseagreg1427
05-21-2010, 04:59 PM
if it was one he gave or planned to give to someone else, no way in hell. and i would wonder what the hell was wrong with him if he thought that was ok.

but i am not materialistic and i would have no problem with a great antique ring, a family ring, a ring that i love but isnt expensive, etc.

J&D7
05-21-2010, 05:08 PM
I wouldn't mind a "previous worn" ring if it was something passed down in his family or if he bought it from a pawn shop. But there's no way I would take any ring he originally bought for someone else. I don't care where he gets it from, I just want to be the only one he's bought that ring for.

Agreed. I actually like the thought of an antique ring but I do NOT want an ex's ring ... that'd be like I was second best or something.. I dunno. :cool:

ghostgirl7389
05-21-2010, 05:30 PM
I'm unashamedly materialistic.

Funny true story though. My husband purchased my engagement ring right out of college, and couldn't afford a lot. The ring was less than 4 carats, but lovely all the same. We had a long standing joke that he would replace that ring someday, and that's what made me agree to marry him.

Fast forward several years, and he surprised with my upgrade; a gorgeous, top of the line, Tiffany bezel mounted, platinum engagement ring, with matching wedding band, bought as a set. The original small engagement ring and plain band wedding ring went in the safe, and stayed there until 2 years later..when I lost the upgrade. I have no idea what happened, I literally looked down one day and it was gone. Luckily it was insured, and replaced. For another 2 years, and the same thing happened.

For whatever reason, until we reported it to our insurance, I pulled out my originals, and have worn them ever since. That was about 5 years ago, and for some reason, these have never been lost. My husband jokes that I have lost the down payment on a home off of my hands in the last decade.

Unexplainable, but a part of me hopes that somebody who would fully enjoy them found them!

Mrs. Happy
05-21-2010, 05:33 PM
I wouldnt whare a used ring as my wedding ring. I told my husband it didnt have 2 b expensive and i wouldnt care if it came from a gum ball machine. Whatever he gave me i would b happy. The only thing i did not want was a used ring!

chelseagreg1427
05-21-2010, 05:44 PM
I'm unashamedly materialistic.

Funny true story though. My husband purchased my engagement ring right out of college, and couldn't afford a lot. The ring was less than 4 carats, but lovely all the same. We had a long standing joke that he would replace that ring someday, and that's what made me agree to marry him.

Fast forward several years, and he surprised with my upgrade; a gorgeous, top of the line, Tiffany bezel mounted, platinum engagement ring, with matching wedding band, bought as a set. The original small engagement ring and plain band wedding ring went in the safe, and stayed there until 2 years later..when I lost the upgrade. I have no idea what happened, I literally looked down one day and it was gone. Luckily it was insured, and replaced. For another 2 years, and the same thing happened.

For whatever reason, until we reported it to our insurance, I pulled out my originals, and have worn them ever since. That was about 5 years ago, and for some reason, these have never been lost. My husband jokes that I have lost the down payment on a home off of my hands in the last decade.

Unexplainable, but a part of me hopes that somebody who would fully enjoy them found them!


maybe a subconscious thing because you truly would rather have the one that was given to you at the time you were asked?!

ghostgirl7389
05-21-2010, 07:13 PM
I have considered that! That's why I haven't replaced them.

aba
05-21-2010, 08:32 PM
,,,,I am going to take that 4 carat ring and dip it in platinum and slap it right on my finger!!!!!

Babi-

are you sure a 4 carat platinum ring would do justice to such an elegant woman like yourself? 4 carats is pretty small you know. :D

Esteli-

mereces un anillo nuevo con muchos diamantes aunque eres muy linda por aceptar cualquier. :)

ShoesHappen
05-21-2010, 08:53 PM
Pawnshop Wedding Rings by The Derailers
Songwriters: Warden, M; Villaneuva, Tony;

Pawnshop wedding rings, so many shattered dreams
Broken vows from lovers who gave up
But you can count on me, to be yours faithfully
And stand beside you when push comes to shove
And these pawnshop wedding rings are gonna learn about love

I couldn't give you a ring that's new
But I can give you a ring of truth
And a love that won't grow old
Shining like that band of gold

Put your hand in mine
And everything will work out fine
Together I know, we can rise above
And these pawnshop wedding rings are gonna learn about love

I imagine on our wedding day
When we stand in front of the preacher and say
"We'll be together 'til death do us part
And give those rings a brand new start

Pawnshop wedding rings
So many shattered dreams
Broken vows from lovers who gave up
These pawnshop wedding rings are gonna learn about love

They're gonna learn about love

outinaussie
05-21-2010, 09:31 PM
Pawnshop Wedding Rings by The Derailers
Songwriters: Warden, M; Villaneuva, Tony;

Pawnshop wedding rings, so many shattered dreams
Broken vows from lovers who gave up
But you can count on me, to be yours faithfully
And stand beside you when push comes to shove
And these pawnshop wedding rings are gonna learn about love


love that!!! i was just about to type how id feel like itd be bad luck to put on someones ring from pawnshop where the relationship went wrong or whatever led to it being there... but saw your post & did make me see other side of that..
i couldnt accept a ring where they proposed to someone else with.. wasent there rumours that mariah careys man did that??? i just couldnt ..dont care how expensive...
lebeau did bring up interesting thought about changing band but keeping stone... jurys still out on that???
the wedding rings are a treasured symbol of married love...eternal love...
id wear one that was handed down from a couple who had a happy loving marriage..especially a cherished family member..
but i think its also nice for your rings to be about your love story..
but in the end..guess really,it dosent matter what ring you wear..its all about how each person respects it ... if the ring has been a reminder of your love in tough times, has led you not into temptation & so on.. its done its job no matter where it came from.

MENELSGURL
05-21-2010, 09:51 PM
Yes i have bought pawned rings for special occasions no .matter how much money you have you will be suprised what you can find at a pawn shop at a fraction of what the real purchase price would originally cost. I bought my ex husbands wedding ring at a local pawn shop the same ring would of cost me $300 more . As for me i dont mind at all. I am looking for rings now my babies sister suggested a pawn shop so atleast i wont be embaressed to carry a pawned ring. If you want something good also you can try diamond nexus lab.com i was refered to this site by a friend . The rings are nice man made diamonds that are nice and cheap. Wish you luck it is not as bad as you think the only problem is if he gave the ring to another chick first 'd taking it back just then you are in public and the ex says that was there ingagement ring then you have a big problem. Wow

Boomboomschick
05-21-2010, 10:14 PM
I agree w the majority... After he went to prison the money is gone the cars the tv......we don't have the money! I have my old bridal set ( just my part of it) from my ex ( who "borrowed" $$ from his dad to get it for me. I loved his father like he was my own and sadly he passed at the end of this year. I will never pawn these rings bc I know who bought them) I breifly considered using them when we get married however, he knows it's from my ex and regardless of who bought them they represent that time in my life. He was ok in me having the stones put in another setting. That way it's a pretty piece and it will remind me of my almost fil.

I think we might check out the pawn shop, or tattoo our names on that finger...either way will be just as married...just as much in love

great thread

GoodBI_girl
05-21-2010, 10:33 PM
I wouldn't wear a ring that he bought for someone else before me, I'm not a materialistic person I would just do without before I did that :)



Last thing I'd want to hear is "Wow, __'s ring looked so much better on her hand". I guess my circle is pretty closed huh?:D

baby_ bird
05-22-2010, 01:03 AM
I also wouldn't have a problem with the ring being from a pawn shop because it's still new to me. But I WOULD NOT want a ring he bought for another woman first.

Hisoneandonly
05-22-2010, 06:54 AM
If he got them from a pawn shop, they would be new to us...

I would be little miffed though if he had given me his ex wifes rings, just a hang up on me I think. But I wouldn't have taken it.

june5
05-22-2010, 07:05 AM
I wouldn't wear a ring that was purchased for another woman, but I'd accept it, sell it, and keep the money in a heartbeat.

alwayslovinghim
05-22-2010, 07:08 AM
no I wouldn't wear them but what I WOULD do, get them appraised, sell them, and by the one I want

outinaussie
05-22-2010, 07:13 AM
I wouldn't wear a ring that was purchased for another woman, but I'd accept it, sell it, and keep the money in a heartbeat.

LOL... :thumbsup: hed deserve that one...

alwayslovingme..said exactly same thing.. think you guys wrote it at same time..lol.. trippy..

saracmc
05-22-2010, 07:24 AM
Don't like jewelry and don't wear it (diamonds don't symbolize "love" to me, they symbolize hard labor in South Africa).

My husband bought two simple, inexpensive bands that we keep in a wooden box. I don't know if these were originally meant for someone else or not. It doesn't matter. If he hadn't gotten any rings, that would have been fine with me, too.

We used the extra money saved from the "no diamond" rings for a beautiful, memorable trip to the Colorado Rockies.

MichiJC
05-22-2010, 07:47 AM
I guess I am a snob, I don't like jewelry from the pawn shop, probably a sad occasion for the ppl to pawn in the first place...i dont want that karma lol.
i absolutely would not wear a ring he bought for someone else bc the design and cut of the gem stones are probably custom to her.
a ring passed down through family generations is ok....but thats about it.

Mitch67
05-22-2010, 08:10 AM
I am not really a jewellery person either but if my man and I married I would want to at least wear a wedding band. That said I would happy wherever it came from as long as it was bought with me in mind. I would be kind of p****d if he bought rings for a previous girlfriend and then thought he could get away with giving the same ring to me.

Miss Esme
05-22-2010, 09:51 AM
I am more fussed about the commitment then the ring. I used to be all about the bling but that diamond will not keep me warm at night so I really don't care.

BlueEyedEllie
05-22-2010, 09:59 AM
Not to change the thread, but I worked in a jewelry store for a number of years and the consensus among the long time jewelry sales personnel was that the marquise diamond cuts were the kiss of death for any marriage. All the sales people would feel so sorry for a bride-to-be when she left the store with that stone. Underground jewelry store urban legends? Probably :)

Didn't read near all the posts,but YIKES!!!:eek:BOTH my engagement rings from my 2 marriages were marquis cuts!!there must be some truth to this!!:eek:in answer to the op's question;an heirloom or a pawnshop one,sure i'd accept that.A recycled one from one of his ex's,never.....I'd feel second rate and i won't put up with that feeling ever again in my life!!:rolleyes:If he can't afford one i'll give him a roll of aluminum foil and tell him to get to work!!;)

esteli
05-22-2010, 09:59 AM
ahh...appraisals usually not mean that you can sell that ring for that much. appraisals are for insurance companies, once you try to actually sell a ring the amount you get is cut significantly unless you do a private party sale, and private party sales are not easy to come by. just the reality of it.

esteli
05-22-2010, 10:04 AM
Esteli-

mereces un anillo nuevo con muchos diamantes aunque eres muy linda por aceptar cualquier. :)

LOL adam, no me importan las cosas materials ya. he cambiado mucho. tuve un anillo muy lindo una ves de muchismo valor...pero el hombre no.

esteli
05-22-2010, 10:05 AM
Pawnshop Wedding Rings by The Derailers
Songwriters: Warden, M; Villaneuva, Tony;

Pawnshop wedding rings, so many shattered dreams
Broken vows from lovers who gave up
But you can count on me, to be yours faithfully
And stand beside you when push comes to shove
And these pawnshop wedding rings are gonna learn about love

I couldn't give you a ring that's new
But I can give you a ring of truth
And a love that won't grow old
Shining like that band of gold

Put your hand in mine
And everything will work out fine
Together I know, we can rise above
And these pawnshop wedding rings are gonna learn about love

I imagine on our wedding day
When we stand in front of the preacher and say
"We'll be together 'til death do us part
And give those rings a brand new start

Pawnshop wedding rings
So many shattered dreams
Broken vows from lovers who gave up
These pawnshop wedding rings are gonna learn about love

They're gonna learn about love


LOL :p:p:p:p a song about pawnshop wedding rings. thank you for sharing!!!

outinaussie
05-22-2010, 10:17 AM
LOL adam, no me importan las cosas materials ya. he cambiado mucho. tuve un anillo muy lindo una ves de muchismo valor...pero el hombre no.

you sound so sexy talkin spanish esteli..:p

teyesbaby
05-22-2010, 10:26 AM
Baby girl my problem is honesty if u had to find out about this thru another resources (that's a red flag). First of all there are no secrets when you are in a relationship. If it was me he would have to find a way thru a family member to get me another ring or pawn that ring and take that money to buy my ring. The original cost of my ring (1.7 carat) was $1799 but he sacrifice alot and it took him a year to get all of the money together. I went to kay's the week of valentine's day and the sales were unbelievable the lady gave us every discount that she could and got my ring down to $900 with taxes and warranty included. The true and real meaning is the beautiful union of love you both share. Don't let no one tell u different there's no price tag on that.

MiSSiNHiM0412
05-22-2010, 11:01 AM
i honestly would not wear a ring that was ment to be for someone else nopee noppee noppeee but i do have his moms ring as one of my wedding rings buts fine with me because its his moms not someone he used to be intamet with

esteli
05-22-2010, 11:27 PM
Thanks for all your responses. This isn't about my personal situation. I just wanted to know people's beliefs about such things as rings. I really thought more people would be superstitious. I'm glad to see that is not the case. In my life I've had it all from the super expensive out of your mind ring to the gumball machine ring. Now I just want love.

My thoughts on such things as engagement rings and wedding rings have changed over the years. Thanks for all your responses.

iloveyoumore
05-23-2010, 12:18 PM
I love estate jewelry and would not have problem with it at all. That is completely different than having a ring he purchased for someone else. I would frankly be amazed if he had any jewelry left from his old life considering the drug problem he had! I recently traded a beautiful ring my ex-husband gave me for a much nicer one that I don't mind wearing on my right hand.

waittill_08
05-23-2010, 01:31 PM
I would never take anyone elses jewlery -- like his ex's or something -- hell no.... his baby's mama wears a necklace that belonged to his girlfriend before her and I laugh to myself cause I think it is so tacky.