View Full Version : Why do prisoners need money?


gaia_girl
02-04-2010, 11:18 AM
Everything essential will be supplied won't it?
The only things i can think of them spending extra money on would be too much chocolate and getting fat, or drugs!
and obviously a small amount for paper +stamps.
How would prisoners really benefit from extra money?
What are the possibilites for luxaries if a prisoner has any amount of money?
Would it be a worry they'd spend it mostly on junk food or drugs?

crow57
02-04-2010, 11:44 AM
Everything essential will be supplied won't it?
The only things i can think of them spending extra money on would be too much chocolate and getting fat, or drugs!
and obviously a small amount for paper +stamps.
How would prisoners really benefit from extra money?
What are the possibilites for luxaries if a prisoner has any amount of money?
Would it be a worry they'd spend it mostly on junk food or drugs?


My experience from being behind the walls is that an inmate can get by without spending money from the outside, but if a man is down for a long bit, money will help.

Prisons do not allow inmates to shop regular stores for property, they only allow 'clear' electronics that can only be purchased through law-enforcement owned outlets. The prices of these items are four to ten times higher than Walmart.

Television, alarm clock, radio, electric razor and beard trimmer are the electronics. Many prisons will allow an inmate to have a hobby. Prisons do not give inmates materials for hobbies.

Some inmates may wish to purchase books and correspondence courses that are not available through the prison. Phone time must be purchased. Envelopes, paper and stamps must be purchased.

Then there is canteen. Snack food and raman noodles are available if you have spending money.

Many prisons offer paid jobs, starting at about twenty-five cents an hour, but inmates cannot secure one of these jobs until he has been incarcerated for a while.

Does an inmate need money? No. Does it make life easier and more bearable? Yes.

sweetnessva
02-04-2010, 11:47 AM
Everything essential will be supplied won't it?
The only things i can think of them spending extra money on would be too much chocolate and getting fat, or drugs!
and obviously a small amount for paper +stamps.
How would prisoners really benefit from extra money?
What are the possibilites for luxaries if a prisoner has any amount of money?
Would it be a worry they'd spend it mostly on junk food or drugs?

Just depends on your boyfriend. Mine uses money for stamps, food, and phones. If he gets a long time he will probably use it on tvs, clothes, shoes, and other things he wants. But i know he wouldnt be using it on drugs. So i just try to make him as comfortable as possible while he is in there.

light at end
02-04-2010, 11:48 AM
Yes, thier basic essentials are provided, and that means very basic. Toothbursh, toothpaste, comb, toilet paper, small bar of soap (the size that usually we throw away since it is too small to even use), razor. That's about it. There are many other essentials that they need that arn't provided. Lotions, shampoo, deodorant, etc.What they are provided is cheapest of the cheap. The food they are served can't usually be identified as food. Lot's of inmates don't even go to the chow hall for meals so they eat solely by what they buy from "canteen" or by what they get from packages. Also if they do go to eat at the chow hall it isn't enough to fill them up.
Not every person in prison does drugs, that's a very generalized assumption that it will be spent on drugs.

NewAttitude
02-04-2010, 12:11 PM
Yes!!!! They use the money for envelopes and stamps, books, pictures. They also can buy canteen...food items. And the "essential" things the prisons provide are not of the best quality. I have always, and always will, keep money in my man's account. Also, it is good to have some food items in the event that that prison serves something that the inmate may not want. I have said this before... They call Mike Mr. Trump because he always has what he wants. And it doesn't take alot of money. This is Mike's 4th prison bid. When he first goes in, I put $100 so he can get all his needs. Then I send him, on average, $30.00 each week. I have read on PtO where women send their men like $100. a week. I asked Mike about it and he said that he doesn't see why. He said that although that amount each week is nice, what could he possibly need that much for? Mike says they probably need that much so they can write their other girls. Or put it on their phone account to call other people. I told him to "shut up." He just laughed and said that it aint us going through that BS. Mike does not even call me everyday. He calls every other day. And only stays on the phone for the one call. He says "we aint giving all our money to the prisons like that." Oh yeah, and Mike always has a check from the prison for unused money in his account. And it's a pretty decent check beings that he only got $30.00 a week. I am so lucky to have a man like Mike. And to think that everyone thought that he was going to hurt me some how. Not all thugs are bad.

crazycasey183
02-04-2010, 12:14 PM
The prisons don't feed them enough, my old man buys lots and lots of noodles...& some snacks and cig's.....

kellya5107
02-04-2010, 12:29 PM
They do provide their basic needs but that is really slack. I send my hubby money every wk to buy whatever he may need. everything is usually more expensive in there than out here. mine buys snacks, envelopes and stamps and whatever else he may need while in there. I always, always keep money on my hubbys account.....he buys books and stuff to shave with too.

Wobabi
02-04-2010, 01:15 PM
,,Well lets see there is restitution-the feds certainly aint payin that for you and if you dont pay you cant even spend the money you get.
Do you have a head ache or a cough? Well that will cost
,,And for sure the Feds dont put money on your pre-paid phone account so if you want to talk to anyone you better have money.

Now if you are only talking EXTRA money then sure he will buy a candy bar and chips (If thats FAT on his hard muscled body then give me some of those bars:rolleyes:)
He will order magazines and such but as far as him being kicked back in the lap of luxury in his private one man cell with a TV and fluffy comforters on a pillow top mattress smokin a spliff-aint happening in the feds:rolleyes:

Dollface.09
02-04-2010, 01:25 PM
I dont think thats it the fact of providing the stuff needed, i think its more of a comfort thing. I like to send my man a few dollars so he can buy envelopes, paper, stamps, soap, shampoo, ect. They do provide it, however they only provide a certain amount. The inmate usually runs out of that stuff before the prison gives him anymore. Just think if you were in prison, would you want someone to send you some money so you can get a few things just to help you be a little more comfortable?

Also for medications and such. My man has to take medicine for his siezures, so its a must he take them, their only $2 for his prescription, but i would rather send him the $2 to get them, than have him go into debt with the prison over it. Especially cuz for him they are a MUST!

Miss Esme
02-04-2010, 01:27 PM
I send mine money because he can't use that standard prison soap. He has to buy things so he can be clean i.e. half decent soap, shower slides, deodrant etc. Also when he first went in, he needed things like a pad lock as he is on a dorm and he does not want anybody taking his stuff. Oh he needed things like briefs as they were trying to give him some used boxers. Now I don't care how many times they have boiled washed it, it's still nasty. Oh and things like stamps and paper.

Now I am not saying that men in there can't survive without the money because they can, but I am not having my man do it.

gaia_girl
02-04-2010, 01:42 PM
Thanks guys.
I know that in prison in this country they spend extra money on cigarettes, playstations, CDs, DVDs, chocolate, drugs, designer sports wear to show off, like the latest nike shoes/clothing etc..
which is exactly why i didn't send this person money who i'm related to because he didn't deserve a breeze of a time, i obviously didn't want him to ever think it was okay to go back to jail (out of love).

Now I have a penpal/lover (early days :-p) in an american prison, (doing over 20 years) and from what i can gather from documentaries american prisons are VERY different, a lot more harsh and he can't even wear his own clothes, they all have to wear inmate jump suits! and there's no smoking, i assume no playstations or nintendos..
and i wonder if he did have extra money would it really improve his life? would i really be helping if i was to send some $$$?
Can they buy better quality food with their own money, or just junk/snacks?
I want him to be healthy so he will have many years left after he's released, for example if he can purchase some oily fish in tins that's great, or nuts or whatever, but i wouldnt want to encourage him to have like several packs of cookies (which is what i would do if there was nothing else to entertain me, not necessarily a good thing though).
Maybe it would just help if i sent him book after book, and music etc..

And of course if there's not much he can spend extra money on he might use it to call other girls, etc.. just for something to do

Miss Esme
02-04-2010, 01:54 PM
Yep UK & US system is wayyyyyyyy different hun. Trust me I know. HMP as rough as it is, is slightly nicer compared to the US when it comes to the basic stuff. I know guys who were in HMP who had nicer stuff then me and I was free and working. It's crazy. If my baby was in a HMP I would not be as fussed about sending money but I am telling you where he is in the US, he needs the extra stuff.

Mariposa93009
02-04-2010, 02:03 PM
...... for necessitiesor extras i.e. deoderant, soap, shower slides... if he's on lockdown he can order food because the food that they get when their on lockdown is nasty. He also uses the money to transfer funds on his prepaid phone card.

Rosr Mary
02-04-2010, 02:06 PM
Everything essential will be supplied won't it?
The only things i can think of them spending extra money on would be too much chocolate and getting fat, or drugs!
and obviously a small amount for paper +stamps.
How would prisoners really benefit from extra money?
What are the possibilites for luxaries if a prisoner has any amount of money?
Would it be a worry they'd spend it mostly on junk food or drugs?


My man can't keep their food from the chow hall down, it's so bad. So if I didn't send him money he wouldn't/couldn't eat nor could he buy stanps or paper.So no not everything is furnished, or at least not eatible food!!!

chelseagreg1427
02-04-2010, 02:10 PM
well I got him a tv at first but that was a big expense(that we'll get back when he comes home).

otherwise, the food they serve is not enough to keep him full especially since theyre dinner is so early. so he buys ramen and cookies and stuff. but it doesnt mean he's unhealthy! he works out twice a day and needs the extra calories and food to keep going.

otherwise where we are its very cold and snowy so he bought an extra sweatshirt because what they gave him was not enough.

and most importantly envelopes so he can write me!

Tardisgirl
02-04-2010, 02:59 PM
Mine needed it just to get a little comfort stuff, and he was able to put money on his phone acct. So, I didn't have to mess with it.

Believe me, it really irked me to know that he was paying out the wazoo for stuff I have a ton of and often get free with coupons. But everybody needs a little comfort.

sweetgirlb
02-04-2010, 04:42 PM
I know you have been down that path... but not all situations are the same..
In the SHU, my man does not get enough to eat, he needs to supply his own coffee, vitamins, anything to do with toiletries and cosmetics (as they refer to them) and if he wants something sweet, he has to get it himself.

I would send him quarterlies, but in the SHU he only gets 'yearlies'... I wonder how much Mrs. Dash and garlic powder he will need to last a year... in order to stomach the crap they call food.

He also needs money to see a doctor or mail anything out bigger than a standard 44 cent mailing.

....

Does an inmate need money? No. Does it make life easier and more bearable? Yes.

canthelpbutwait
02-04-2010, 06:27 PM
Other than things such as restitution and buying neccasities the facility the prison dont provide- they dont NEED money but they dang sure can use it- shoot, last meal at 3pm someplaces- best believe they hungry by morning. You want your man to write you? Best believe he need some money for that paper,the stamps and that pen. THERES soo many reasons a man could use money while they gone- shoot i duno bout you but i sure snack sometimes and if my man wanted to buy some chips then i could care less. AND DRUGS!? Sounds like a trust issue, if you worried your man buying drugs why be with him?

kiddsgirl4life
02-04-2010, 07:12 PM
Yes..They do need money, dont be under the false assumption that they dont..Even if there are some ppl that think they dont.
The prison does provide toothpaste ( the toothepaste we were given we used to clean the floors with if that shit can eat the stuff off the floors just think what it does to ur teeth! ) and soap ( That is used to keep ur whites white better than bleach u really want that used on ur skin? )

They spend money on stamps, paper, envelopes, pens ( unless u dont want to get any mail ) shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, combs, toothbrushes, meds ( asprin, tylenol, cough drops, chapstick,) toothpaste, good soap, cups, bowls, FOOD ( if u dont make store, starve to death either the food aint fit to eat or u dont get enough ) coffee. Oh and they are charged to see medical/dental. Some prisons they have to pay for phone calls ( but here they call home collect ) if they are working on their cases then they have to pay for copies of law materials...

I will always keep money on my hubby's books ( if I have it ) even $10 helps out a whole lot!

NOT EVERYONE IN PRISON SPENDS THEIR MONEY ON DRUGS

gaia_girl
02-05-2010, 02:25 AM
They have to spend money to see a doctor or dentist? WTF?
:-o
obviously momney is necessary in THAT case.

As for deoderant, i've never even used that, you take a bath right

forAllan
02-05-2010, 03:19 AM
Some prisons they even have to pay to do laundry. stamps,envelopes, phone calls, toiletries, food, tons of stuff. hats, long johns,....

Daywalker
02-05-2010, 03:23 AM
Everything essential will be supplied won't it?
The only things i can think of them spending extra money on would be too much chocolate and getting fat, or drugs!
and obviously a small amount for paper +stamps.
How would prisoners really benefit from extra money?
What are the possibilites for luxaries if a prisoner has any amount of money?
Would it be a worry they'd spend it mostly on junk food or drugs?

They need money in TX, because NOTHING is supplied for them. Everything except their uniform and a shower towel is at their expense. Toothpaste, soap, deodorant, shower shoes (a MUST in TX), and any kind of food other than three meals a day, 2 of which are centered around some kind of bean, they need money for. They have to buy their stamps, however, I sent my husband in paper and envelopes, because commisary prices are just flat ridiculous. Even with the money I sent him, my husband came out literally skin and bones. Not all inmates do drugs, and the food is so awful in there, that Ramen noodles outranks chocolate on comm day.

esteli
02-05-2010, 04:53 AM
Mine spends money on all this listed below and mostly he pays for the gifts he has other inmates make me such as cards, drawings, jewelry, bead work, etc. Everything he sends to me.

Yes..They do need money, dont be under the false assumption that they dont..Even if there are some ppl that think they dont.
The prison does provide toothpaste ( the toothepaste we were given we used to clean the floors with if that shit can eat the stuff off the floors just think what it does to ur teeth! ) and soap ( That is used to keep ur whites white better than bleach u really want that used on ur skin? )

They spend money on stamps, paper, envelopes, pens ( unless u dont want to get any mail ) shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, combs, toothbrushes, meds ( asprin, tylenol, cough drops, chapstick,) toothpaste, good soap, cups, bowls, FOOD ( if u dont make store, starve to death either the food aint fit to eat or u dont get enough ) coffee. Oh and they are charged to see medical/dental. Some prisons they have to pay for phone calls ( but here they call home collect ) if they are working on their cases then they have to pay for copies of law materials...

I will always keep money on my hubby's books ( if I have it ) even $10 helps out a whole lot!

NOT EVERYONE IN PRISON SPENDS THEIR MONEY ON DRUGS

NewAttitude
02-05-2010, 05:22 AM
[quote=chelseagreg1427;5211539]well I got him a tv at first but that was a big expense(that we'll get back when he comes home).


Yeah, I got Mike a TV once they moved him from the county. Once we found out he would have to serve more than two years, a TV was a must.

Shush
02-05-2010, 06:04 AM
stamps and supplies,to stay in contact
vitamins to add to their body as they dont get good food, most of all they nearly dont get any vitamin C in winter times, what helps to stay more healthy
things like fish, rice, soups, to add to their food, as often there are things they cannot eat except to have to stay on the toilet after.... experiences.
shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste and such, as what they get from the State is not really great.
sometimes cloths, shoes, even they better get them in a parcel. even they should get such things from the STate it is not certain they do; often things get stolen as well..... it is good to know your man is warm in winter! as the cells often are real cold.
there are many more things, small things they are needed. for those they have to stay long, they are worth like gold: for example a fan in summer time.....

it was a journey to find out, what is better to send in a parcel, what he can get himself using money I send. the money which he has made himself was not enough to even pay the stamps (Europe needing 3 41 stamps each letter; there are no interenational ones he can get)
getting coke helps as well, as sometimes this is a good remedie for stomach problems

I have never send any luxury. or well, once a packet of cookies for his birthday. all the rest is stuff he needs in day life, things they are normal for us out here.....

......... it is a pretty lousy feeling to find out after a long time what they dont have in there.... my Man never asks for anything at all. and he did only allow me to send him anything after we decided to stay together. it was hard to make him accepting this help, but it makes me feel better to know he has at least some addition for his day life.
just my experience and point of view.....

Whitbread
02-05-2010, 07:03 AM
Yes..They do need money, dont be under the false assumption that they dont..Even if there are some ppl that think they dont.
The prison does provide toothpaste ( the toothepaste we were given we used to clean the floors with if that shit can eat the stuff off the floors just think what it does to ur teeth! ) and soap ( That is used to keep ur whites white better than bleach u really want that used on ur skin? )

They spend money on stamps, paper, envelopes, pens ( unless u dont want to get any mail ) shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, combs, toothbrushes, meds ( asprin, tylenol, cough drops, chapstick,) toothpaste, good soap, cups, bowls, FOOD ( if u dont make store, starve to death either the food aint fit to eat or u dont get enough ) coffee. Oh and they are charged to see medical/dental. Some prisons they have to pay for phone calls ( but here they call home collect ) if they are working on their cases then they have to pay for copies of law materials...

I will always keep money on my hubby's books ( if I have it ) even $10 helps out a whole lot!

NOT EVERYONE IN PRISON SPENDS THEIR MONEY ON DRUGS

How are drugs even available in prison?

Shush
02-05-2010, 07:13 AM
How are drugs even available in prison?

well, they are a source of income..... as much as tobacco, alcohol (who is often made in the cells, called pruno) there are other illegal things like mobile phones....

they are there.... and normal not visitors can bring them in, as the guys are stripped searched after a visit....

so who else has access to prisons? but of course nobody would say that officers are making special money this way, right?

kiddsgirl4life
02-05-2010, 07:26 AM
They have to spend money to see a doctor or dentist? WTF?
:-o
obviously momney is necessary in THAT case.

As for deoderant, i've never even used that, you take a bath right


I dont think I've ever run across someone that doesnt use deodorant, maybe you all dont have any need for it over there....I dont know how hot it gets over there but it gets hot in the states and YES they take showers but they also sweat when they go on the yard, workout, even when they do nothing and with 100+ in a dorm it tends to start smelling really bad, hense the deodorant, even so we use it in the winter also.They also have no heat or air conditioning here in prison at least state prisons well Georgia does not.

Yep they have to pay for medical/dental.

On the weekends here in Georgia prisons and county jails and the boot camps they only get 2 very skimpy meals...My hubby used to weigh bout 185 when he went in now he's bout 145-150

kiddsgirl4life
02-05-2010, 07:37 AM
How are drugs even available in prison?



I wont ever say how, but they are.

love_ben
02-05-2010, 08:33 AM
i keep my husband in money for the simple fact i am a house wife so when he if her makes sure i have what i need and want and made sure i did before he so there would be no worry while he is gone and i can still be home with our daughter and he has worked his butt off to do that so yes i try to return the favor for him and the simple fact is ilove him and want him to be as happy as he can no matter where he is at

61 days and i will be in his arms again

ghostgirl7389
02-05-2010, 09:08 AM
I'm half on this. On one hand, I don't send my husband money. I could, and it wouldn't be a problem, but I don't. I do agree that he is fed and has free rent, so I'm not worried about that. Yeah, the food isn't the greatest, but thousands eat it every day and are perfectly fine. Not liking something doesn't count as need, and I'm sure there are people in the world right now who would be ecstatic to eat the meals they serve.

I do send packages when I can, and his mother sends him money I believe. We've already paid his restitution. If he asked me, I wouldn't say no, I mean, it is his business that supplies the majority of our income. But he never has.

cazann23
02-05-2010, 03:14 PM
Ok first off you need to ask him what he wants, how much and for what. I send my husband money for the phone, stamps, envelopes, food, clothes, art supplies, hygeine and anything else that he wants. My husband also works in the pen so he makes his own money as well. My baby just got hit with a long sentence and I am not going to let him sit in there and rot. I do what I can and if I cant he is just fine with that. If you truely love someone you do all you can for them and when they are in prison that isnt much.

D13
02-05-2010, 04:20 PM
It all depends on where you loved one is doing time. Here in TX, inmates are allowed very few luxuries. Indigent status regardless of the length of sentence is tough as the basic necessities supplied aren't very good at all. Simple hygiene items don't meet the daily hygiene needs of someone trying to keep themselves as clean as possibly to prevent sickness and infection from living in such close quarters. Although three meals are provided, there are times when supplemental food purchased from the commissary is necessary. Not every meal is palatable or nutritious. Stationery needs are important as well as the comforts of reading material. Do prisoners need money? Well, no. Nobody needs money if you're looking at things objectively. Does my wife or anyone's loved one who is incarcerated need money? Yes, I think so as a means to have some of the simplest of luxuries; some candy, perhaps a soda. I would hate my wife to return from prison without any remembrance or semblance of being free.

D13

kevsbabygirl
02-05-2010, 04:26 PM
I know that to save on the state budget in Ohio they have been cutting back on inmates food. So money is necessary so he doesn't starve! Kev eats a lot! I can't imagine being bored with nothing to eat. He lifts a lot of weights so he isn't getting fat, he just needs more food. Not to mention better personal supplies. the crap they give them is just that...crap

Hisoneandonly
02-05-2010, 05:41 PM
I'm one that doesn't send money on a regular basis, I wish I could but most the time I just can't afford it witht he kids and stuff.
When I send him money its used on decent soap, extra food, coffee, and stuff to write me, he has also sent me cards and all.
I'm getting ready to send him money for a TV, bc he does have alot of time left and says that it will help it out b/c he will be able to watch what he wants and won't have to be out as much.
Usually my husband gets an avg of 20 every other month.

one.four.three
02-05-2010, 05:49 PM
They need money for all sorts of things to survive however, some need money cause either 1) gambling 2) drugs...meaning if they need it every single week-end in large amounts...:rolleyes:

thugwife
02-05-2010, 06:03 PM
[quote=kiddsgirl4life;5212975]I dont think I've ever run across someone that doesnt use deodorant, maybe you all dont have any need for it over there....I dont know how hot it gets over there but it gets hot in the states and YES they take showers but they also sweat when they go on the yard, workout, even when they do nothing and with 100+ in a dorm it tends to start smelling really bad, hense the deodorant, even so we use it in the winter also.They also have no heat or air conditioning here in prison at least state prisons well Georgia does not.


I am glad you addressed this, I was certainly going to say something about it:eek:

You put a bunch of men in prison, and someone is gonna sweat:rolleyes:

Miss Esme
02-05-2010, 06:23 PM
[quote=kiddsgirl4life;5212975]I dont think I've ever run across someone that doesnt use deodorant, maybe you all dont have any need for it over there....I dont know how hot it gets over there but it gets hot in the states and YES they take showers but they also sweat when they go on the yard, workout, even when they do nothing and with 100+ in a dorm it tends to start smelling really bad, hense the deodorant, even so we use it in the winter also.They also have no heat or air conditioning here in prison at least state prisons well Georgia does not.

Ok I'm British and I don't know about the OP but every fellow Brit I know uses deodrant including myself. My man ain't in Prison in the UK but people I know who have been used deodrant in and out of prison. It dosen't get as hot in the UK as it does in certain states but just like a US prison, they will not put up with a stinky dude. They push weights same way.

kiddsgirl4life
02-05-2010, 07:09 PM
[quote=kiddsgirl4life;5212975]I dont think I've ever run across someone that doesnt use deodorant, maybe you all dont have any need for it over there....I dont know how hot it gets over there but it gets hot in the states and YES they take showers but they also sweat when they go on the yard, workout, even when they do nothing and with 100+ in a dorm it tends to start smelling really bad, hense the deodorant, even so we use it in the winter also.They also have no heat or air conditioning here in prison at least state prisons well Georgia does not.

Ok I'm British and I don't know about the OP but every fellow Brit I know uses deodrant including myself. My man ain't in Prison in the UK but people I know who have been used deodrant in and out of prison. It dosen't get as hot in the UK as it does in certain states but just like a US prison, they will not put up with a stinky dude. They push weights same way.


I wasnt refering to every Brit, although if it came off that way I'm sorry. I have a really good friend from over there that uses it as well. I was just stating that to the OP that maybe they have no need for it...But I'm with you on the smelliness...I just wanted the OP to know that Yes they do take showers but they also have the need for deordorant.

gaia_girl
02-06-2010, 02:03 AM
There's no reason for anyone who doesn't use deoderant to be a stinky dude.
You take a shower after vigorous exersize.
Fresh sweat doesn't smell bad, it only smells bad if you don't wash after and let it go stale.
It's bizzare to me to hear deoderant being called a necessity, anymore than cookies and chips are.

I suppose I can understand it being helpful however, for people living in close proximity if they have bad wind or something though, lol



[quote=kiddsgirl4life;5212975]I dont think I've ever run across someone that doesnt use deodorant, maybe you all dont have any need for it over there....I dont know how hot it gets over there but it gets hot in the states and YES they take showers but they also sweat when they go on the yard, workout, even when they do nothing and with 100+ in a dorm it tends to start smelling really bad, hense the deodorant, even so we use it in the winter also.They also have no heat or air conditioning here in prison at least state prisons well Georgia does not.

Ok I'm British and I don't know about the OP but every fellow Brit I know uses deodrant including myself. My man ain't in Prison in the UK but people I know who have been used deodrant in and out of prison. It dosen't get as hot in the UK as it does in certain states but just like a US prison, they will not put up with a stinky dude. They push weights same way.

gaia_girl
02-06-2010, 02:07 AM
One more question; (and thanks for everyones replies)
how are you sending money internationally to the USA?

Miss Esme
02-06-2010, 02:43 AM
[quote=gaia_girl;5214717]There's no reason for anyone who doesn't use deoderant to be a stinky dude.
You take a shower after vigorous exersize.
Fresh sweat doesn't smell bad, it only smells bad if you don't wash after and let it go stale.
It's bizzare to me to hear deoderant being called a necessity, anymore than cookies and chips are.

I suppose I can understand it being helpful however, for people living in close proximity if they have bad wind or something though, lol

LMAO! I am fully aware that fresh sweat does not smell however, I was not just refering to exercise. Where my man is, it gets real hot and it is not a hotel where he can just run and take a shower everytime he feels a sweat bead. I can't speak for everybody but Deodrant is a NEED for my man.

Also, most people send money internationally through J pay or Western Union.

gaia_girl
02-06-2010, 05:04 AM
ah, jpay don't cover the area, so western union who take 10% is my option? :/

BlueEyedEllie
02-06-2010, 05:17 AM
I rarely send money but spend alot on the phone.he knows how to jail very well but since he mentioned in passing recently that the jail soap his skin has such a bad reaction to he can hardly stand it(itching)I've decided i need to start sending a little something every month.we had a little argument about doing it but i do think i need to.sure he won't die but sometimes it's kinda nice to provide a little something.tv's,radios,playstations,no i wouldn't pay for that but needs and snack foods,why not IF you can afford it.

gaia_girl
02-06-2010, 09:29 AM
Well the thing is, i give 12 a month to 4 different charities straight from the bank, that's 48 a month (about $80?) Most of that money probably goes on admin, the rest on helping people..
If my penpal could use $80 a month to make a positive difference I could easily give it to him instead.
My only wonder was if he could really use it, I didn't just want him to have extra money if junk food and chocolate were the only extras he could get.
Anyway we're not at a point get were i'm confident enough to offer, i dont want to offend him..

gaia_girl
02-06-2010, 09:32 AM
can i send him nice healthy foods? lol
i must sound like a control freak haha

sweetgirlb
02-06-2010, 10:19 AM
Well the thing is, i give 12 a month to 4 different charities straight from the bank, that's 48 a month (about $80?) Most of that money probably goes on admin, the rest on helping people..
If my penpal could use $80 a month to make a positive difference I could easily give it to him instead.
My only wonder was if he could really use it, I didn't just want him to have extra money if junk food and chocolate were the only extras he could get.
Anyway we're not at a point get were i'm confident enough to offer, i dont want to offend him..


if you know your charitable efforts mostly go to admin, how is that any different than an inmate being squanderous with funds?

I volunteer at food banks and soup kitchens so I can be sure 100% of my efforts go to feeding people

gaia_girl
02-06-2010, 10:33 AM
if you know your charitable efforts mostly go to admin, how is that any different than an inmate being squanderous with funds?

I volunteer at food banks and soup kitchens so I can be sure 100% of my efforts go to feeding people

Admin IS necessary in their defense.

How is him squandering money on *junkfood* different? He will become unhealthy! I need him to be as healthy as possible so he can spend a long healthy post-jail life with ME :-)

Miss Esme
02-06-2010, 10:53 AM
I don't know what facility your friend is at but where mine is they don't have the option of ordering things like salads. To be honest, I would doubt that your friend is unhealthy. They have nothing to do in there so the guys end up working out allot and they tend to need extra food to sustain them. Expect things like noodles and stuff but even then thats not always enough.

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 12:22 AM
Admin IS necessary in their defense.

How is him squandering money on *junkfood* different? He will become unhealthy! I need him to be as healthy as possible so he can spend a long healthy post-jail life with ME :-)



omg....
so WHAT if he eats junk food.. he'll get it with or without your help if THATS what he really wants.

are you trying to completely change him... even what he eats? are you one of those "fat people are inferior" types? cuz i guarantee you, he will eat AT you to spite you.
how long will the power struggles go on before the relationship deteriorates?
if he is really going to spend a life with you... are you gonna be his wife, or his mother?

gaia_girl
02-07-2010, 12:58 AM
omg....
so WHAT if he eats junk food.. he'll get it with or without your help if THATS what he really wants.

are you trying to completely change him... even what he eats? are you one of those "fat people are inferior" types? cuz i guarantee you, he will eat AT you to spite you.
how long will the power struggles go on before the relationship deteriorates?
if he is really going to spend a life with you... are you gonna be his wife, or his mother?

If I was in jail with not much to do and suddenly had extra money and they were selling cookies and similar snack etc, i would definately eat more of that crap to pass the time. I wouldn't want to be given that temptation. Hence why I don't bring junk food into my home, we're all weak when it comes to it.
It's not about getting fat, he could look healthy and eat plenty of cookies, but his arteries would get clogged with saturated fats and he would suffer a heart attack eventually, not what I want for him.

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 01:13 AM
If I was in jail with not much to do and suddenly had extra money and they were selling cookies and similar snack etc, i would definately eat more of that crap to pass the time. I wouldn't want to be given that temptation. Hence why I don't bring junk food into my home, we're all weak when it comes to it.
It's not about getting fat, he could look healthy and eat plenty of cookies, but his arteries would get clogged with saturated fats and he would suffer a heart attack eventually, not what I want for him.


I dont mean to be mean when i say you are a bit delusional.
he doesnt need your money to get/eat cookies.
I dont know how long he has been down, but i suspect you are new to this whole deal. A lot newer than he is.

oh AND that crap they slop our guys with....
highly overprocessed meat, loaded with sodium and saturated fats. And only white bread. fake mashed potatoes. lots of starchy unidentifiable stuff. If they get a fresh vegetable, its from a can.
.... and that's the good stuff.. .then there is the stuff they wont put into dog food, but will go to the prison kitchens...

an old friend of mine I used to work with told me, when he was in prison they would get pork and beans, and the pork would be chunks of fat and skin with hair on it.
is THAT what you think is "good" for your man?

It makes my day to send my man "cookie money".,. it is the bright spot in his day.



http://www.truthaboutabs.com/saturated-fat-is-not-evil.html

gaia_girl
02-07-2010, 02:16 AM
I dont mean to be mean when i say you are a bit delusional.
he doesnt need your money to get/eat cookies.
I dont know how long he has been down, but i suspect you are new to this whole deal. A lot newer than he is.

oh AND that crap they slop our guys with....
highly overprocessed meat, loaded with sodium and saturated fats. And only white bread. fake mashed potatoes. lots of starchy unidentifiable stuff. If they get a fresh vegetable, its from a can.
.... and that's the good stuff.. .then there is the stuff they wont put into dog food, but will go to the prison kitchens...

an old friend of mine I used to work with told me, when he was in prison they would get pork and beans, and the pork would be chunks of fat and skin with hair on it.
is THAT what you think is "good" for your man?

It makes my day to send my man "cookie money".,. it is the bright spot in his day.



http://www.truthaboutabs.com/saturated-fat-is-not-evil.html

That's.. utterly.. gross.


Interesting link, I've never heard anyone argue that saturated fats weren't bad so very confusing. It seems obvious to me that they ARE bad though.
Animal fat is gross.
They wanna feed them processed meat and then they can buy cookies with extra, god I worry. I would like to be able to send in good food to my man if I could, do you have any info on being able to do so?

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 02:38 AM
That's.. utterly.. gross.


Interesting link, I've never heard anyone argue that saturated fats weren't bad so very confusing. It seems obvious to me that they ARE bad though.
Animal fat is gross.
They wanna feed them processed meat and then they can buy cookies with extra, god I worry. I would like to be able to send in good food to my man if I could, do you have any info on being able to do so?

most (maybe all) states now you can only send from vendors and they only have packaged, processed, etc.
you cannot send anything else except books, stationery and in some instances clothes.
I know you dont like hearing the undesired truth... but your man is used to his current lifestyle and has accepted it for the duration.
If you truly want to be supportive,
you are going to have to stop asking the situation to come up to your level.
You have to come down to its level. It really is the only way.


there IS one option... and that is if your man is at a "ranch" you can bring a meal in, but it must be consumed at the visit and it must be purchased, not prepared.
I used to visit a friend, who was at a ranch for a stretch, and bring him avocados .

grace4today
02-07-2010, 03:07 AM
I was in a "private" women's prison and everyone thinks "private" like a private girls school or something and let me tell you this is not true. They provided nothing!!!! We had to pay for everything that could not be brought in to the prison and they had so many ridiculous rules that changed with the wind. And, there were certain things you had to order from cominsary that they would not accept from the outside because everything has to be alcohol free. So, yes, money is needed in prison. I lost twenty poounds while being locked up. I did not "pig out". I was on a budget just like I was while I was at home. I realize we are convicted felons, but we are human beings too. I thank God every day for how supportive my husband was while I was away. I would be crushed if he thought sending me some money in prison was a burden or I was going to buy drugs. What a stigma! Thanks T.V.

gaia_girl
02-07-2010, 07:05 AM
thanks guys, do you know if things like tinned makerel fish and hemp seed bars can be sent in reguraily?

OneOfMany
02-07-2010, 07:55 AM
thanks guys, do you know if things like tinned makerel fish and hemp seed bars can be sent in reguraily?

I don't know where your friend is... if he's in the US, you can find his prison on the internet. I know MOST prisons do NOT allow food to be sent in. As a previous poster has mentioned, those that do allow have strict rules that must be followed.

As for what UK prisons allow... I'm totally clueless on that.

You asked jokingly if you sounded like a control freak... yes, seriously, you do. Does he even LIKE makerel fish and hemp seed bars? Do you know?

I don't think you're concerned about the money itself, but how he spends it. Do him a favor and don't send any. With the money would come stipulations and a big headache. Personally, I would rather be dirt broke. Or maybe tell a pretty lie to the person that sent it, "Oh yeah, I spent the money on hemp seed bars just like you told me to."

Some women send however much is comfortable for them, with the trust that it'll for food, art supplies, hobbies... TRUST is the tricky part. Something that I don't sense you don't have with this guy. As someone else mentioned; he's not your child.

Maybe I'm reading you wrong... I hope so. You mean well, however, there is only two choices to make:

**don't send the money, or
**send the amount of money that does not put you in any hardship and forget about it.

Miss Esme
02-07-2010, 08:04 AM
LMFAO with the hemp seeds. You cannot be serious. Where do you think these men are at, a resort? Check the DOC website for your guy. Since you asked about international payments, I will take it he is in the US and not the UK.

gaia_girl
02-07-2010, 08:11 AM
you can order those health foods online from the manufactorer which is why I thought it might be possible, so I can and was being serious, in light of the slop they're said to be expected to eat.
I have heard of people sending in cookies! So I don't know why my idea was so ridiculous.

And how can anyone not like makerel fish? :-p

Ronsbaby
02-07-2010, 08:52 AM
I put money on my baby's books, he uses it for toiletries, phone, emails, stamps pens, pencils colored pencils, envelopes, paper, snacks, clothing he's gotten he's in fed so no tv in his cell, i have to practicly beg him to buy snacks and extra's otherwise he saves money that's put on his books, and he will buy things for me at times and send home lol --- he even sent money home to the oldest son to buy me birthday and christmas gifts, from him saving what i put on his books. he's not where he's going yet but was recently able to get a job, wow his whole 12cents an hour and he's scrubbing pots n pans 5 days a week! it's crazy! He picked the job but it's crazy he does what he does an only get's 12cents an hour! he feels better though that he's got something extra to do and gets some money! so he's happier bout having the job! he needs a better pair of sneakers then the slipper like sneakers and i've begged him to promise me that when i send in some extra money to buy a better pair cuz they can buy a decent pair of sneakers but as usual he's not promising me he'll buy them so he'll save the money then like always! :/ I wish we could send things in to them it would be cheaper but not only that then at least he'd have some of those lil extra's that he wont buy!
not all use for drugs or gambaling!!! I do know that there are a lot of guys that do not get any money will gamble for things n money! so while ur worried bout him buyin those cookies if he wants cookies and chocolate he will get it some how anyway!!

gaia_girl
02-07-2010, 09:17 AM
I put money on my baby's books, he uses it for toiletries, phone, emails, stamps pens, pencils colored pencils, envelopes, paper, snacks, clothing he's gotten he's in fed so no tv in his cell, i have to practicly beg him to buy snacks and extra's otherwise he saves money that's put on his books, and he will buy things for me at times and send home lol --- he even sent money home to the oldest son to buy me birthday and christmas gifts, from him saving what i put on his books. he's not where he's going yet but was recently able to get a job, wow his whole 12cents an hour and he's scrubbing pots n pans 5 days a week! it's crazy! He picked the job but it's crazy he does what he does an only get's 12cents an hour! he feels better though that he's got something extra to do and gets some money! so he's happier bout having the job! he needs a better pair of sneakers then the slipper like sneakers and i've begged him to promise me that when i send in some extra money to buy a better pair cuz they can buy a decent pair of sneakers but as usual he's not promising me he'll buy them so he'll save the money then like always! :/ I wish we could send things in to them it would be cheaper but not only that then at least he'd have some of those lil extra's that he wont buy!
not all use for drugs or gambaling!!! I do know that there are a lot of guys that do not get any money will gamble for things n money! so while ur worried bout him buyin those cookies if he wants cookies and chocolate he will get it some how anyway!!


Oh bless your husband!
I guess it's important for a man to feel like HE's earning and giving something, even if it's just a little. He sounds like a good guy.
Thanks for your story.

Maybe I will try harder to make a money making project work for him so I'm not the one giving.
He suggested selling beadwork.
I wish I could find out how to, then it would really be *his* money and it'd be a more comfortable arrangement.

JKB's Girl
02-07-2010, 09:50 AM
For real, even when they have extra money to spend on canteen, its not like they get the cream of the crop to choose from, they don't. What is available on the canteen list for my guy, the list that is considered the good stuff, I would not buy it for my dog. Some of the products are made from companies that I've never heard of.....they look like the products that you know you would never ever consider buying at the grocery store, if even the worst grocery store here would carry them!!!!

Why do you think the prisons allow these companies on their approved list? You know its all about the profit. The cheaper the product, the higher the price, the more money they make and don't think that DOC is not getting a big slice of the pie cause they are. Don't even get me started on the private facilities, they are worse than the state run facilities about this.

So when I can, I do send him extra money without question on what he's spending it on.....if he can get something that is "better" than what is served in the chow hall, then great. As far as the trust thing goes, I absolutely trust him to spend the money where it will do HIM the most good. He's the one that has to survive in there, and if you don't trust him to spend the money where he needs it, then what are you doing with him anyway????

I'm all about trusting him to make the right decisions that will keep him write up free and parole eligible. If he did not, you can bet I would not spend an extra minute holding him down whether it be with money or anything else.

OneOfMany
02-07-2010, 10:26 AM
He's the one that has to survive in there, and if you don't trust him to spend the money where he needs it, then what are you doing with him anyway????



:bow:

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 10:47 AM
thanks guys, do you know if things like tinned makerel fish and hemp seed bars can be sent in reguraily?


you can get things like canned fish ( in a plastic bag, not a tin) from the vendors. hemp seed bars? you need to get on program here...

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 10:56 AM
you can order those health foods online from the manufactorer which is why I thought it might be possible, so I can and was being serious, in light of the slop they're said to be expected to eat.
I have heard of people sending in cookies! So I don't know why my idea was so ridiculous.

And how can anyone not like makerel fish? :-p


PLEASE reread post #54
You sound like you really dont want to accept the reality of the entire situation.

... you seem to not be able to separate your own expectations and desires from anyone else's.
You kind of have me wondering all sorts of things

oh, AND.... some people HIGHLY detest makarel, ESPECIALLY canned.

grace4today
02-07-2010, 11:18 AM
You will really have to check with the rules and regulations that apply only to the prison where your loved one resides. You should be able to get a copy of the rules that pertain to your situation. I could order tuna from the cominsary only. We we allowed to absolutely have no food brought in to our prision. Visitors could not even get a soda or water. I know of other prisons that have vending machine in the visiting room -- not us. We got zilch. They were so afraid of contraband!!!! I will tell you he will have to eat the high carb, high sugar, high fat foods they serve in prison or he will starve. I did not eat for 14 days and was threatened to be moved to another prision. They serve that crap because it is more filling. Do you think they care if we get heart disease while locked up? Heck "No". There are definitely some foods I will never eat or look at again in my life!:haha: Hang in there this is a very small hurdle that you will glide across.

gaia_girl
02-07-2010, 11:18 AM
tinned makerel fillets in sunflower oil is gorgeous :) skinless and boneless 'princess' good meat.

"TRUST" I was asking what the options were, what they can buy in jail, if healthy food isn't an option there then trust is irrelevent, i'd want to send it in to help, IF healthy food is available there then i'm sure he'd use extra money on it.
Would I 'trust' him not to use extra money on junk food, IF junk food was the only thing he could buy with that money?
No.
I don't trust myself with junkfood! So I wouldn't want to give him that temptation, just as I would rather the temptation be taken away from me.
I say to my friends and family; PLEASE take that chocolate gateu out of my sight! and i'm serious. That's what i'm talking about

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 11:28 AM
tinned makerel fillets in sunflower oil is gorgeous :) skinless and boneless 'princess' good meat.

"TRUST" I was asking what the options were, what they can buy in jail, if healthy food isn't an option there then trust is irrelevent, i'd want to send it in to help, IF healthy food is available there then i'm sure he'd use extra money on it.
Would I 'trust' him not to use extra money on junk food, IF junk food was the only thing he could buy with that money?
No.
I don't trust myself with junkfood! So I wouldn't want to give him that temptation, just as I would rather the temptation be taken away from me.
I say to my friends and family; PLEASE take that chocolate gateu out of my sight! and i'm serious. That's what i'm talking about


OMG... once again .. not to trying to hurt any feelings here... but I really hope for his sanity, he has other friends who arent so narcissistic.

when my man comes home its gonna be ALL about Ben an Jerry's (I am on an icecream vigil, I wont eat ANY until we can have some together.) We will pig out on ice cream until he says enough. (and all the good things I will cook for him, as cooking is my profession)

He is in the SHU.. .he cannot get anything more than $45 a month's worth and absolutely NO WAY TO MAKE MONEY. They wont let him no matter how clever he is about it.

he gets a few zoozoos, (because i send him what little I can) but certainly not enough to make him fat.
He prefers vitamins and coffee (which my daughter swears IS a vitamin).

gaia_girl
02-07-2010, 11:48 AM
OMG... once again .. not to trying to hurt any feelings here... but I really hope for his sanity, he has other friends who arent so narcissistic.

when my man comes home its gonna be ALL about Ben an Jerry's (I am on an icecream vigil, I wont eat ANY until we can have some together.) We will pig out on ice cream until he says enough. (and all the good things I will cook for him, as cooking is my profession)

He is in the SHU.. .he cannot get anything more than $45 a month's worth and absolutely NO WAY TO MAKE MONEY. They wont let him no matter how clever he is about it.

he gets a few zoozoos, (because i send him what little I can) but certainly not enough to make him fat.
He prefers vitamins and coffee (which my daughter swears IS a vitamin).

You don't know me, so saying i'm narcassiistic isn't a fair judgement.
I send very positive letters to him.
I hope you have a good feast when you're reunited, I'm not against feasting, I would just prefer my loved ones to be consuming goodness in everyday life.

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 11:52 AM
You don't know me, so saying i'm narcassiistic isn't a fair judgement.
I send very positive letters to him.
I hope you have a good feast when you're reunited, I'm not against feasting, I would just prefer my loved ones to be consuming goodness in everyday life.


no.. I suppose it isnt fair to assess only what i read here to sum up your personality.. excuse my rashness...

but to be fair,,,,,your wanting your loved one to be consuming goodness in everyday life... HE IS IN PRISON. its NOT THE SAME AS OUT HERE!!!!!!

gaia_girl
02-07-2010, 11:57 AM
no.. I suppose it isnt fair to assess only what i read here to sum up your personality.. excuse my rashness...

but to be fair,,,,,your wanting your loved one to be consuming goodness in everyday life... HE IS IN PRISON. its NOT THE SAME AS OUT HERE!!!!!!
Calm down, lol
What do u mean by that?
He might feel better if I get some good food to him

thugwife
02-07-2010, 01:59 PM
This has to be one of the most BIZARRE threads I have ever read on here. :shrug:

jacmac12
02-07-2010, 02:16 PM
With my hubby being locked up I have sent lots of money. At first I didn't under stand Y he needed so much money either. But I was helped to realize that a lot of the things that are needed to live in the free world is needed more in there. No, incarceration is not suppose to be a joy ride, but it helps to make the ride a little more easier. Look at it as being in college. The basics my be supplied, but it always helps to make it easier if the student had some of the same opportunities the other classmates have. The same in prison. It cuts down on confusion if the inmate has their own. There's nothing like having your own stuff. It also in some ways makes them feel self-suffient.

KathleenTX
02-07-2010, 03:22 PM
Everything essential will be supplied won't it?
The only things i can think of them spending extra money on would be too much chocolate and getting fat, or drugs!
and obviously a small amount for paper +stamps.
How would prisoners really benefit from extra money?
What are the possibilites for luxaries if a prisoner has any amount of money?
Would it be a worry they'd spend it mostly on junk food or drugs?

I send my cousin money as he is in Arizona. Twenty percent of what I send him goes towards his restitution. He must pay co-pays to go to the doctor. He must pay electric if he wants to use the CD player I bought him last year for his birthday. He needed a copay for his glasses if he wanted them to be scratch resistant.

He is quite ill. Vitamins and ibprophin are a luxury item and he has to purchase them himself. Notebook papers, stamps, birthday cards to send to his brothers, envelopes all cost money.

Here is a question for you though - In your home how many rolls of toilet paper do you go through in a week?

My friend who is in Ad-seg in Texas is given 1 roll of really gross public bathroom style 1 ply a week. This has to be used for many things. If his nose runs as there isn't kleenex, no paper towels amd no napkins either. Now if one has an upset stomach they might need more than one roll in a week. Same with soap. Most inmates become clean freaks due to germs floating around.

As for food being a luxury ... Look at Texas this past month. As of today there are over 44 units that have at least some part shut down due to gastrointestinal illnesses. I do not want him eating anything that comes out of the kitchen right now. I would tell him to eat fresh fruit but he is only given that 2 times a year on Thanksgiving and Christmas.

I do not want either of them to have to "hustle" just to have toilet paper or vitamins.

If there is one thing I have learned in these past years is that most do need some extra money and that it isn't for luxury items.

I look and see how much money I waste at McDonalds or any other fast food place or buying a single soda for 1.40 and I would rather send the money to them.

Anyway that is my take on the system.

Iamjustagirl
02-07-2010, 03:23 PM
They do not need money but they have a strong want for it because it makes their time easier on them. The more they write, email, call, eat snacks etc - the happier they are.

Stylista
02-07-2010, 04:20 PM
You don't know me, so saying i'm narcassiistic isn't a fair judgement.
I send very positive letters to him.
I hope you have a good feast when you're reunited, I'm not against feasting, I would just prefer my loved ones to be consuming goodness in everyday life.

*-*
I have to agree wit sweetgirlb .....ur really in a fantasy world ...my man will probably be disgusted if I sent him sum healthy foods I am a R.N so I know ur about his health but boo he in prison he is not on damn vacation .... good luck

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 05:10 PM
lol I have a friend who did a stretch, and was well taken care of... she would buy a big box of tootsie pops and would trade one lolly a day for two oranges that were given to a diabetic (she got them because she was diabetic, and needed it for health reasons)

june5
02-07-2010, 05:51 PM
I'm sorry but I cracked up reading this. He's in prison...what if he eats junk food and clogs his arteries. OK.

I think if you are meant to be together, and he is the man for you, when you send him the money, he will spend it on the healthiest snack possible. If he buys a honeybun instead, dump him. Problem solved.

Hisoneandonly
02-07-2010, 08:51 PM
I don't know about anyone else, but I see sending my husbnad money (when I can) as sending it to a good cause, I mean I'm sending it to my love, so he can make himself alittle more comfortable in the he**hole he is in for the next 5 years.

sweetgirlb
02-07-2010, 08:53 PM
that's what I'm talking about!!

I don't know about anyone else, but I see sending my husbnad money (when I can) as sending it to a good cause, I mean I'm sending it to my love, so he can make himself alittle more comfortable in the he**hole he is in for the next 5 years.

gaia_girl
02-08-2010, 02:07 AM
*-*
I have to agree wit sweetgirlb .....ur really in a fantasy world ...my man will probably be disgusted if I sent him sum healthy foods I am a R.N so I know ur about his health but boo he in prison he is not on damn vacation .... good luck
Ok, most of this thread is people saying what crap prisoners are expected to eat, yet when I suggest sending him good quality food, i'm living in a fantasy world, and your man would be disgusted if you tried that.
Am I missing something?
When did it become offensive to want to send someone decent food?:confused:

gaia_girl
02-08-2010, 02:10 AM
If my man was inside for like 2 years i might just send him cakes and crap to keep him happy.
But he's in jail for another 15 years so whatever he's eating for ALL that time will have a big impact.

But you're right, how dare I consider sending him oily fish and such, what a bitch I am :-s

JKB's Girl
02-08-2010, 08:43 AM
What you don't seem to get is that there is not a long list of QUALITY items that the prisons allow to be sent to them or allow them to order, that's all. If your man is at a facility that this is allowed then he has got to be about the only one I've ever heard of.

But hey, you continue your quest to get healthy nutritious food to him, let us know how that works out. Truly, it would be nice to hear that one of the prisons developed a conscience about the health of the inmates.
..
Most of them here do not care one iota about the diet of the inmates NO MATTER what policy states. What the policies state and what actually happens are two vastly different things.

In a time when most states are hurting for money, the last people that they consider spending money on is the prisons and the inmates.

You need to read more about the state of the corrections system in this country. That's where your fight needs to be.

sweetgirlb
02-08-2010, 12:56 PM
Ok, most of this thread is people saying what crap prisoners are expected to eat, yet when I suggest sending him good quality food, i'm living in a fantasy world, and your man would be disgusted if you tried that.
Am I missing something?
When did it become offensive to want to send someone decent food?:confused:


the fantasy part is where you think this is a real and do-able option. WANTING to and actually doing it is NOT the same thing.

my man loves to eat healthy, but he has been stuck eating prison food for 15 years.. .and he has managed to stay healthy, lean and strong.

sweetgirlb
02-08-2010, 12:58 PM
I might need to correct this...
prisons get LOTS of money, esp. in CA (as most of it goes to admin and staff)... it just never reaches the inmates.

What you don't seem to get is that there is not a long list of QUALITY items that the prisons allow to be sent to them or allow them to order, that's all. If your man is at a facility that this is allowed then he has got to be about the only one I've ever heard of.

But hey, you continue your quest to get healthy nutritious food to him, let us know how that works out. Truly, it would be nice to hear that one of the prisons developed a conscience about the health of the inmates.
..
Most of them here do not care one iota about the diet of the inmates NO MATTER what policy states. What the policies state and what actually happens are two vastly different things.

In a time when most states are hurting for money, the last people that they consider spending money on is the prisons and the inmates.

You need to read more about the state of the corrections system in this country. That's where your fight needs to be.

grace4today
02-08-2010, 06:23 PM
Wow! I came back to see what was going on with the question about sending prisoner's money and, to my surprise, this thread has gotten a little "off the hook" (to say the least). This is crazy to me that this question about money and then, what type of foods you can and can't get in prison or what items you can bring into the prison has caused so much tension and heated responses. Actually, this has really gotten out of hand. Go back and read the whole forum. Get a grip. Plain and simple, when in doubt of the rules, get the rules for the prison that "your" loved resides and you will have to abid by these rules whether you like it or not. You all need to realize that you have little control over a lot of trivial things while either being in prison or having a loved on in prison. This web site is here for support, so pick you battles. Everyone had different priorities in life, so be it.

kerrlo2009
02-12-2010, 09:09 AM
I'm sorry but reading through this thread gave me some much needed comic relief today. :thnx:

:idea: Sounds to me like there might be a "culture gap" here. In defense of the whole deoderant thing, I seem to recall hearing/reading somewhere that, compared to Europeans, Americans do tend to obssess more about personal hygiene. I don't mean that in a judgemental way at all.

And, if there's "culture gap", I'll freely admit to some "culture shock" at how expensive it can be for people who have someone in an American prison - and I'm born/raised in our USA. So, when L. first told me where/how I could send money, I really didn't have a clue about why he might need it. Wish someone would've given us the heads up on that!

His mom and I both send him what we can when we can. Some of it is definitely to maintain contact - money for stamps, envelopes, phone calls. (Barring emergencies, phone calls are maybe once a week, once every couple of weeks)

Some of the food items may be luxuries, but if we can help with those to bring some "normalcy" to a radically changed life - well, I/we are glad to do so. I also know that he gets in on some card games where everyone brings some munchies to the table. Again - get some positive social interaction so why not?

A radio - he said "alone" time is hard to find so if he's looking for some "down" time and is laying on his bunk with his headphones on - generally no one bothers him. If he can fit a TV into his/our budget - more power to him.

He also was able - once he reached his designation - to buy some casual "civilian" clothes - like sweats. I know he needs them partly because of the weather and partly because he's getting into some sports stuff. But, I like my mental image of him in sweats better than that last yellow jumpsuit anyway. :)

So - it's been a learning process for us too - the ins/outs of what we can/can't send, and I'm sure over time, the budget will be visited/revisited depending on cirumstances.

But - if you figure out how to send that mackerel - keep us posted. I'd love nothing more than to get a lil ol' lobster to L. :D Or some sardines in mustard sauce.....:eek: (his taste - not mine :yuck: )

All this talk of food has given me the taste for some Ramen noodles....;)

yaslee
02-12-2010, 03:31 PM
I'm sorry but reading through this thread gave me some much needed comic relief today. :thnx:

:idea: Sounds to me like there might be a "culture gap" here. In defense of the whole deoderant thing, I seem to recall hearing/reading somewhere that, compared to Europeans, Americans do tend to obssess more about personal hygiene. I don't mean that in a judgemental way at all.

And, if there's "culture gap", I'll freely admit to some "culture shock" at how expensive it can be for people who have someone in an American prison - and I'm born/raised in our USA. So, when L. first told me where/how I could send money, I really didn't have a clue about why he might need it. Wish someone would've given us the heads up on that!

His mom and I both send him what we can when we can. Some of it is definitely to maintain contact - money for stamps, envelopes, phone calls. (Barring emergencies, phone calls are maybe once a week, once every couple of weeks)

Some of the food items may be luxuries, but if we can help with those to bring some "normalcy" to a radically changed life - well, I/we are glad to do so. I also know that he gets in on some card games where everyone brings some munchies to the table. Again - get some positive social interaction so why not?

A radio - he said "alone" time is hard to find so if he's looking for some "down" time and is laying on his bunk with his headphones on - generally no one bothers him. If he can fit a TV into his/our budget - more power to him.

He also was able - once he reached his designation - to buy some casual "civilian" clothes - like sweats. I know he needs them partly because of the weather and partly because he's getting into some sports stuff. But, I like my mental image of him in sweats better than that last yellow jumpsuit anyway. :)

So - it's been a learning process for us too - the ins/outs of what we can/can't send, and I'm sure over time, the budget will be visited/revisited depending on cirumstances.

But - if you figure out how to send that mackerel - keep us posted. I'd love nothing more than to get a lil ol' lobster to L. :D Or some sardines in mustard sauce.....:eek: (his taste - not mine :yuck: )

All this talk of food has given me the taste for some Ramen noodles....;)

Definately a culture difference, I read that most americans feel a tumble drier is a necessity! And clothes pegs aren't even available in shops.
Over here we hang our washing out on the line or put it over radiators.
I've heard Americans say 'douches' are necessary too, and they probably think girl that don't use them are gross. Well we don't use them.

sweetgirlb
02-14-2010, 02:02 AM
Definately a culture difference, I read that most americans feel a tumble drier is a necessity! And clothes pegs aren't even available in shops.
Over here we hang our washing out on the line or put it over radiators.
I've heard Americans say 'douches' are necessary too, and they probably think girl that don't use them are gross. Well we don't use them.

I was born and raised in California... spent most of my life there.

I used to live where we had to lift water from the well, and we had no electricity. We had a no-plumbing outdoor shitter. we did our wash in the tub, cooked on a campfire, and let the dogs keep us warm at night. We hunted, fished, and farmed. I still, to this day, have hand made dishes I made myself.

I also lived in an apartment with all the luxuries.... ( and so many other places with a variety of qualities between these two extremes)

these places were 10 miles from one another.
.....So .....
I am not getting your point...

as for "douche".. I thought it was a funny sound young boys made as they pretended to kill one another in play

sandrar
02-14-2010, 08:46 AM
,,Well lets see there is restitution-the feds certainly aint payin that for you and if you dont pay you cant even spend the money you get.
Do you have a head ache or a cough? Well that will cost
,,And for sure the Feds dont put money on your pre-paid phone account so if you want to talk to anyone you better have money.

Now if you are only talking EXTRA money then sure he will buy a candy bar and chips (If thats FAT on his hard muscled body then give me some of those bars:rolleyes:)
He will order magazines and such but as far as him being kicked back in the lap of luxury in his private one man cell with a TV and fluffy comforters on a pillow top mattress smokin a spliff-aint happening in the feds:rolleyes:

LOL well put..:p

DianeDavis
02-14-2010, 11:19 AM
Everything essential will be supplied won't it?
The only things i can think of them spending extra money on would be too much chocolate and getting fat, or drugs!
and obviously a small amount for paper +stamps.
How would prisoners really benefit from extra money?
What are the possibilites for luxaries if a prisoner has any amount of money?
Would it be a worry they'd spend it mostly on junk food or drugs?

Sometimes the prison food is'nt all that great & it's nice for them if they have an alternative, which is where commissary comes in at. No, they can't really get lots of different types of foods through commissary but they can get stuff to work with, which can serve as a meal substitute if they're hungry.

Also sometimes the prison food may be not enough to fill them up so they need that extra snack when they get back to their cells to keep from going hungry. Then of course, you have the stamped envelops, paper, hygeiene products like soap, deodarant, toothpaste, toothbrush & even T-shirts & boxers if they need them. They also sell gym shoes, boots, shower shoes etc.

Most of the time these things don't cost much but they still are necessities.

BlueEyedEllie
02-14-2010, 11:30 AM
I'm sorry but reading through this thread gave me some much needed comic relief today. :thnx:

:idea: Sounds to me like there might be a "culture gap" here. In defense of the whole deoderant thing, I seem to recall hearing/reading somewhere that, compared to Europeans, Americans do tend to obssess more about personal hygiene. I don't mean that in a judgemental way at all.

And, if there's "culture gap", I'll freely admit to some "culture shock" at how expensive it can be for people who have someone in an American prison - and I'm born/raised in our USA. So, when L. first told me where/how I could send money, I really didn't have a clue about why he might need it. Wish someone would've given us the heads up on that!

His mom and I both send him what we can when we can. Some of it is definitely to maintain contact - money for stamps, envelopes, phone calls. (Barring emergencies, phone calls are maybe once a week, once every couple of weeks)

Some of the food items may be luxuries, but if we can help with those to bring some "normalcy" to a radically changed life - well, I/we are glad to do so. I also know that he gets in on some card games where everyone brings some munchies to the table. Again - get some positive social interaction so why not?

A radio - he said "alone" time is hard to find so if he's looking for some "down" time and is laying on his bunk with his headphones on - generally no one bothers him. If he can fit a TV into his/our budget - more power to him.

He also was able - once he reached his designation - to buy some casual "civilian" clothes - like sweats. I know he needs them partly because of the weather and partly because he's getting into some sports stuff. But, I like my mental image of him in sweats better than that last yellow jumpsuit anyway. :)

So - it's been a learning process for us too - the ins/outs of what we can/can't send, and I'm sure over time, the budget will be visited/revisited depending on cirumstances.

But - if you figure out how to send that mackerel - keep us posted. I'd love nothing more than to get a lil ol' lobster to L. :D Or some sardines in mustard sauce.....:eek: (his taste - not mine :yuck: )

All this talk of food has given me the taste for some Ramen noodles....;)
your last couple sentences caused me to think about a thread that was started 2 years ago at thanksgiving.A person posted asking if she could send her loved one a whole turkey thru the mail and this big discussion ensued about how it wouldn't be likely as the more violent inmates could use the turkey bones as weapons,etc!!I never laughed so hard in my life.:haha:

Ronsbaby
02-14-2010, 02:00 PM
my Ronnie, does make cards and sells them or rather trades them i guess you could say. That's for more then i send cuz we communicate a lot! We over spend on the computer time and the phone time, yes he only gets 300mins a month but we have traded phone time too! so while i do not suggest doing that as it's a BIG NO NO lol but my point is we go thru a lot of money on our comunication cuz it's important to US!
The thing is he's lived thru jail bids before wih nobody in his life on the outside.
Listen he's gonna get what he wants if he wants it bad enough!
When ronnie was first writing to me he had nothing, he traded things for paper, pens and stamps! -- he traded food he was getting served, so he wasn't eating properly just to write to me!
i guess my main point is we would all love for our loved one's to get healthier foods in there, but fact is they don't! and the food they serve doesn't even taste good, so if he could have a few cookies to give him a small luxery cuz believe me it's not a luxery for real for real --- isn't it worth it to give him the choice if he wants cookies to have them?
and there is moneys needed for many things, so i guess if you have it wouldn't you rather give to him, then have him possibly gambaling to get those cookies? or being a runner (involved drugs)--- my ronnie was a runner before in jail to make money to have money to get the things he needed when he had nobody to give him anything....so there is ways to get! he also gambled, what else could he do if he wanted anything?
so while you might think your keeping him from drugs gambaling or cookies, just keep those other things in mind!

Ronsbaby
02-14-2010, 02:02 PM
lol bout the turkey and usen the bones as weapons! my daughter wanted to take in a bday cake! she said they are mean that we cant even take in a bday cake for visit! (she's 10)

timswife4ever
02-14-2010, 02:31 PM
I send my man money every week just so he can get writing stuff and what ever else he needs. He usually gets about $20 a week; more in I have it. He buys soap, shampoo, shaving cream, and stuff like that becasue he says the prisons sucks.

Ronsbaby
02-14-2010, 04:47 PM
ok maybe this can clear up just a lil, now keeping in mind every facility is different, and keep in mind my ronnie is in a federal facility right now!
I was telling him a lil bout this post and here is what he told me, cuz like i had mentioned before he wont buy snacks and saves money, but he does buy food, to eat cuz there are foods he will not and i mean will not eat that they serve in there! --- here is what he said ----
hey beautyful...i love you and you would be surprised how much healthy foods you can eat in here if you want....peole talk alot of nonsense but you can eta healthy if you want....they sell tuna and mackerel and chicken breast and rice and lots of healthy stufff like peanits and trail mix and things like that..... believ me you can eat healthy if you want.... insetad of sugar (which they dont sell here) you can use honey and instead if eating ramen soups you can eat rice.... and instaed of cookies you can eat wheat thins and trail mix.... like me i dont eat lots of foods that are unhealthy....i dont eat chips and cookies and stuff like that...i call myslef treating myself when i buy a couple m+ms... yeah i dont eat alot of stuff that is bad for me like sugars and starches and fats... believe me... you can actually buy healthy and eat healthy...... it might cost a little more but it can be done... low fat diets and stuff like that..... i do it cuz i am getting older and now that i dont smoke i figure that my chance of living a long life is alot better and i want all the years that i canget with my baby..........seriously...i do... i love her so much and i want to have so much time wth her that is real time and not this time... i mean this is what it is but i want real time with her.....
yes sometimes even though we are writing to each other we say things like her, i say my lover, i want to be with him, i want him home with me even though the message is sent to him lol --- so this is he message he emailed me a lil bit ago i took out our private part that he wrote after that lol, but anyways so there are some things that they can buy as snacks or to just eat instead of what's served, like my baby eats from canteen sometimes, for meals, i also know he's buddied up with some guys and they put food together and cook together and stuff like that! he mentioned honey so maybe they did start allowing them to have honey again.
now the thing is would i ever tell my baby what to buy with the money i send into him? NO - i want him to have luxieries even the lil ones that they can have, but i have to beg him to buy snacks lol and obviously he's still not really except for some M&ms here and there!
remember not all facilities will have the samethings, but he's been in a state facility in pa, county, and state in md, and now in federal --- anyone have questions let me know i'll as my baby he will tell me what he know's from his experiances

justbeth
02-15-2010, 08:18 AM
Federal prisoners get better food then state prisoners that is a fact.

As my ex husband put it, its a luxury to have a cup of noodles to eat over some of the mystery meat they get served. It's luxury to have tv in their room instead of fighting with the guys out in the day room over what soap opera to watch. He laughed and said he never knew men to go to the hole over Days of Our Lives or General Hospital.

Now they are threatening to take their microwaves because a guy heated up babyoil and water and threw it on another guy during morning visitation yesterday. Now they might limit baby oil as well.

So some of it is just a taste of the outside world for them.

Relda Copning
02-15-2010, 08:49 AM
I send my son money because the prisons in Florida does not feed them enough. They don't get enough food on their trays to keep a child healthy. The FLDOC has substituted soy for meat.
He also has to buy his own hygiene products because they ones they give him does not work. They're kinda like the ones you get when you are admitted to a hospital except they don't work as well.
The way I look at it is: The state has taken years of his life. I refuse to allow them to take his health too.
Inmates do not get all the things the public thinks they do, especially in Florida. My son is in a dorm, not a cell, so he does not have his own tv. There are only certain things he can buy at the canteen so he doesn't have any luxuries. We are not allowed to send care packages to our loved ones in Florida. They only get what is sold and approved by the FLDOC. Florida state prisoners are not allowed computer time. They are pretty much shut off from the outside world so if a little money every week helps him then I will gladly send it.

Grad0507
12-03-2013, 07:09 PM
My boo spends the maximum ($50) on commissary per week. I've been looking at this thread and others and it looks like $150 per month is more than enough (not $200, not $300). I think he's spoiled and tell him so because he's been complaining about not being able to afford luxuries, then he freaks out and thinks I'm saying I want him to do without the basics. It's ridiculous. How can I get him to see he needs to learn to rein it in?

Chapel
12-03-2013, 07:54 PM
My boo spends the maximum ($50) on commissary per week. I've been looking at this thread and others and it looks like $150 per month is more than enough (not $200, not $300). I think he's spoiled and tell him so because he's been complaining about not being able to afford luxuries, then he freaks out and thinks I'm saying I want him to do without the basics. It's ridiculous. How can I get him to see he needs to learn to rein it in?

Can they even spend that much? I think mine can only spend $85 every two weeks. What would they need more than that for?

maniacswifey619
12-04-2013, 12:11 AM
I send my man money every two weeks. So he can buy stuff from "store" as he calls it. Cosmetics....food...snacks...ice cream....soda...stuff like that. Just to make sure he has what he wants and needs. Having nothing makes everyday unbearable and I like him to be comfortable.

nines
12-09-2013, 10:33 AM
I'm sorry but I cracked up reading this. He's in prison...what if he eats junk food and clogs his arteries. OK.

I think if you are meant to be together, and he is the man for you, when you send him the money, he will spend it on the healthiest snack possible. If he buys a honeybun instead, dump him. Problem solved.


I hope that was a joke because It seems like an extremely petty reason to dump someone over given the fact they eat unidentifiable food all week.

On a different note I had to go without canteen for a few weeks and it wasn't pleasant. The only real joy in prison is being able to eat some junk food evfery now and again.

CenTexLyn
12-09-2013, 07:52 PM
Can they even spend that much? I think mine can only spend $85 every two weeks. What would they need more than that for?

different agencies have different spend amounts...and vastly different pricing structures as well. I've seen some County facilities that actually permitted spending upwards of $200 per week.

I'll let others debate the want versus need types of issues. I fall squarely in the category of believing it is up to the individual to send what they feel comfortable with and let everything else fall where it may...

minimaugirl
12-26-2013, 11:50 AM
I send money for stamps, and he needs hygiene stuff and idk what else he buys ^^

thatwiz
12-26-2013, 01:07 PM
Mine now spends $125 for commissary a week and then he has to pay for his phone calls, so thats a minimum just shy of $200 a week. Thats what he also spent last time he was in county. He doesn't eat their food, so full buys each week. So $150 wouldn't really cut it here in NYC to get everything for a month-more like $600 to $700 a month if you want everything.