I know I should be all upset cause of this weekend. I would be trying to decide on what outfit to take with me this weekend, seeing how much money I will be able to take etc. But I can't spend all this time and energy being mad and upset over something I can't control or change. I just love him so damn much and I know I always will. I know this will be a hard long road ahead of us, but true love can survive anything right? We've made it this far, survived a trial, a year without visits already him being moved so far away from me. We've been together for almost 3 years and I just can't see myself with anyone else. I don't care what people think or feel about him. We will get through this and anything else that comes our way. Everything happens for a reason, and god will never give us more than we can handle. I have taken these days seperated from him and I've seen how much I've grown, how my life as changed, and I'm pleased with what I've seen. Compared to where I was going before him, and what was my life before him, I love my life now. I wouldn't trade what I'm feeling now for anything in the world. I'm just so very in love with him!!!! :fb: Spikeswife

Spikeswife: I am so happy to see this post from you. I had been following the other posts and knew that you were struggling--understandably. I was actually just thinking about you this morning and wondering if things were getting better. I am glad that they are. You are so right--the love is what matters. Three years is a long time and a big commitment--and there is obviously enough "glue" there now that you can weather this storm, too. Glad you are happy today. And, happy Valentines day, early!

I am glad you shared your feelings today! I feel the same way and it reinforces me to know that I am not alone with this. I look at it like this...if we can make thru this storm..we can make it thru anything as long as we trust in the good Lord and practice patience...you will have a joyous arrival no matter where you go. Thank you for sharing and stay strong..we can do this!

Thanks very much ladies. I thought it was kinda silly at first to post this. It just seems that everyone just posts whats wrong and such. But I'm growing and I see it and wanted to share. James tells me that I'm the strongest woman he knows and that is the quality he adimires the most in me. I guess I'm started to see that strong woman for myself. There's just no sense in me sitting around feeling sorry for myself cause I can't be with the one I love. It will only make me sick and him worry I'm leaving. He's got more to worry about thats for sure. So thank you all for listening. And I hope everyone has a good Valentines day. I am curious though to know what he was going to send me? He told me in his last letter that he had something speacial planned, and then said well there's always next year!!? I know he won't tell me either he loves to surprise me with things so I would have to bug him non stop. but If I do get it out I will share. And it's the thought that counts isn't it?! about our wedding, well I had picked April 3rd cause our anniversary is on April 1st. I saw that in 2005 we could get married on April 2nd, or we could wait till 2006 and get married on our actual anniversary day!!! Theres no need to rush it especially if it makes it more special!! Well thanks again for your concern and thoughts. And yeah, i'm doing better and I am happy. Spikeswife

I'm glad you posted something positive! I love reading that others, like me, are happy despite all of the challenges that come along with loving an incarcerated person.

I was just thinking last night that this long-timers forum is amazing because I think it is the most positive of all the forums I look at. It's like we are at a different level of acceptance and commitment in our relationships and we don't ever lose hope. That doesn't mean we don't struggle some days that's for sure, but we have the strength and love that bring us through the tough times. I love you guys!!!

My husband asked me why him, what has he done to deserve me? He feels he's just an ordinary man in a terrible predicament. And I begged to differ. I know we all believe our own man is all that and that no other can hold a candlestick to your man. So when I tell you to take Infinity and multiply it and that's how much I love my husband. Only YOU, another woman who loves her man against all odds can truly understand that inspite of his "predicament" I LOVE HIM. :cuffs:

James tells me all the time that he doesn't deserve a woman like me, and askes why I stay. I love him and see the person he really is. Not the person he was when he was on drugs. I don't see the tough guy he trys to portray around other inmates. I see his needs, wants, desires and dreams, and I want to help him fulfill all of them. As he does with mine. Know one can help who they fall in love with and everything happens for a reason and in Gods own time. I have learned so much about myself since I've been with James. I've never been happier or more connected to anyone in my life. I'm just simply so very in love with him!! Spikeswife