You know what? I have never had a visit with him..all these ten years...I dont know how I am able to make it..actually I do...but I just want to know how often do you go and what does it feel like?

What you have NEVER visited your man? 10 years babieboo? OMG! I can't believe my ears girl......you need to go see him RIGHT now! How did the two of you meet?

In middle school...he used to come over all the time..that was almost 12 years ago.

Wow! It's been 2 long girl!

Are you not allowed to visit or have the circumstances just not been right?

I see Travis 2-3 times a month. I've been lucky lately and gotten to see him every week for three weeks now and will get to go again on the 15th and 21st.

I LIVE for our visits. It's the best feeling in the world to be in his arms and be able to see him and touch him and smell him. There have been times when we haven't been able to visit for over a year and it's hard as hell. We both get stressed out when we don't see each other for a while. He says even though he loves the letters and phone calls we share... the visits are the best, because he feels like a man and not a number to be counted and warehoused. He feels loved and cherishes the loving contact that we're able to share during the visits. Me too.

10 YEARS??? WOW! You need to get to see him if at all possible! I could not cope with not seeing my man for 1 MONTH, much less 10 years! I hope you can see him soon. As for me, I visit every week.. we get 5 visits a month so sometimes I get to go twice in a week. I have missed 2 weeks before, because of weather, but it seemed like an eternity when you are use to seeing them every week. How do i feel when i visit? I feel like I am in heaven, and not sitting in a prison. I too LIVE for my visits, as does he. They are an integril part of our lives, and with out them, I would be lost. God forbid anything ever happen to where we could not have our visits. They are the glue that keeps us positive... and leaving him, everytime, I feel like I am leaving my heart behind, it rips at my every nerve to walk out of there without him, but NOTHING compares to walking in and seeing him again the following week... it is a cycle, but I long for the day that he will get to walk out of that place with me... that day will come! :)

I visit once a week for 2 hours. Every so often I take a day off from work because I can spend 4 hours with him on a weekday. I too live for those few hours a week.

It has been 10 year for me also. I visit any where from two to three times a year, we are in differnet states. Whe I do go it is for a special visit so get a 4hr visit. This used to be on Sat. & Sun. but they have decided one day is enough. We get no phone calls unless you call a 5min call once every 90 days, if you are lucky.It is great to be able to talk to him face to face, touch and get those all important hugs and kisses . Well worth the trips!!

How can I get a special visit? Do we have to be married. I live in another state too. Man this is making me want to see him really bad! I dont know how I made it this far. We have always just had letters for our communication..not even the phone. I had a chance long time ago to go see him but my parents found out and DEMANDED for me to not ever go or write him again....He is in CC so i have to wait until he gets moved to medium..he can get visits but only thru glass right now and I think its only for 20 minutes.

babieboo, I am in the same leaky boat. I got my first visit, in ten years, in October. My baby is in a FED jpoint, they keep deny me regular visitation, because of me record, even though I've been good the whole time he's been gone. We just got a lawyer, because its ridiculous. He has to bring the case, tho' cause i have no standing. "Special" visits, in the fed system, are for people they normally don't let in, or during family crisis times. Each institution, varies, in what the definition is. The way to get a special visit, in my case, is to sick your man on them like a dog on a coon. My man,he just refused to quit. The assistant warden, got worn down. My Boo was flippin, after ten years, with seven left, I'm about half razy too. But, there is a chance, I can visit in March. Write to the warden. Does he have visits? Why can't you. If you are, a co-defendant or, a victem then your outta luck, but most other things ... patience, and persistance. Keep your head up girl!

I have so much to say on this topic - like how can corrections departments consider not allowing visits to be good for rehabilitation of offenders, when does an ex-offender "earn" the right to be treated justly and humanely by the system, etc. But, the important thing I have to say to all of you who don't get to visit regularly or at all is that I really admire your strength and dedication.

I have so much to say on this topic - like how can corrections departments consider not allowing visits to be good for rehabilitation of offenders, when does an ex-offender "earn" the right to be treated justly and humanely by the system, etc. But, the important thing I have to say to all of you who don't get to visit regularly or at all is that I really admire your strength and dedication.
Very well said.
I can't imagine not seeing him. I was at the County Jail 3 times a week, and talked every day on the phone. The visits and the calls were totally my lifeline. You guys must have agreat relationship to be able to hold on this long without being able to see eachother. I know I couldn't handle it.
I get to have contact visits in about a month, I can't wait. :cool:

ITS BEEN ALMOST 15 YEARS FOR ME AND HIS DAUGHTER WAS A BABY (8MONTHS) i hope to see him but i just cant seem to get approved

I am so sorry for those of you who cant visit. I go to see my man 2 or 3 times a month. Right now we havnt seen each other for 2 months. Thats his decision, not mine!

I use to go see the Hubbie once a week when he was in county jail. Now he is 150 miles away so I'll be seeing him at least once a month hopefully for 2 hours. I got too much to do to go any more than that. Besides, the Hubbie calls and write. Well I'll be seeing the Hubbie on the 13th of March. The first contact visit since we got married! :D

I try to go see my man 4 times a year, he's 14 hours away from me. Its hard to go see him but I do the best I can. I HAVE to see him even if its just 4 times a year. It would kill me If I couldn't. I use to beable to see him 3 times a week for an hour each but since he got transferred out of state I can't seem to get there as much as I want. However at least when I do see him its on Sat and Sun for 7 hours each day and its wonderful

I could see him every weekend but he is by Oregon and I live in SF that's about 400 miles away!! 8 1/2 hr drive 1 way. I try to go to see him every other month. I wish I could go more but I have 4 kids and it costs almost $300 to go with gas, food, and the hotel. No contact either :rolleyes: ...We see eachother through glass for 2 hours, on Saturday and Sunday. The drive is hell too!! All kinds of mountains and curvy roads with Elk running everywhere...but after I finally get to my visit there is no where else in the world that I'd rather be. I count the days till I get to see him again :) ... Right now I have 29 days to go!! :)

babydoll- I could definitely feel you on that one. The drive is extremly hard and long, just to get out of Fl is almost 6 hours then I have 3 other states to get through and the carolina's take me forever. It costs me around $500 (minimum) for gas, food and hotel not including rental car, but he's definitely worth every dime I spend and our visits are great. I'm already saving up for my next trip in July :)

i see my husband every weekend and when i need a break i miss a weekend. i go up on my days off and when i just miss him so dam much i go up to surprise him. 10 year??? why?

i don't know how you women really do this without seeing your loved one. when i go without seeing paul for 2 weeks i start to lose it... my husband will never be out of state cause he is doing state time but if it was federal for the next 10 years, i don't know if i could handle it. i should never complain anymore....

I cant imagine not getting to see my man for ten years, but if the love is a true love it will stand the test of time. I get to see mine once a month, but that is only because I live 165 miles from where he is, I am in Catoosa, Okla. and he hi in Helena, Okla. and I only get money to travel down there on the 1st of the month. But if I ever get my car paid off maybe I will have more money to go more often. I live for my letters,phone calls, and especially our visits. When our flow gets interrupted it drives me up the wall. I dont know how you have managed for ten years. Mine is doing a 45 year sentence, but he gets good days every month. You are unbeliveable! Hope you get to see him soon! :fb:

you ladies who get to visit are so lucky i get jealous sometimes when i read about visits i have not seen danny in almost 15 years and we are married i will keep trying. be greatful you get to visit and better yet that you can hug him or hold his hand i will never get that even if i am allowed to visit because of shu your all so lucky

I was just wondering why you have'nt got to see your husband in 15 years? You don't even get a non-contact visit? Or do you live to far away from him? I feel so sorry for you, I feel so fortunate that my husband and I get to see each other at least once a month, and I talk to him at least twice a week, sometimes more if it is unusual circumstances. I am so sorry for you. I don't know how I would be able to cope that way. What state are you in? I am in Oklahoma. Keep us posted on whether you get a visit? I will keep you in my prayers! :fb:

I get to go visit every three months or so, hes 350 miles away from me. When i go I stay up there for two days and we can visit both days from 10:00 am till 8:00 pm.

My heart goes out to all of you whom cant see your loved ones... You must all be very strong ladies! I know that when it comes to visits, I am lucky.. very very lucky, also, I feel that if it just so happened to be that for some reason my visits were taken away, Id go nuts, but Id have no choice other then to ride it out... I am thankful my guy is in a state and not a federal institution, at least I know he wont be moved states away even if he ever is moved, and with another 10 years until his minimum, thats always a possibility. I admire all of your strength, it has to be very very difficult to not get to see the people you love for such long periods.....

I visit every other weekend, sometimes the weekend I dont go I make a special trip on Sunday. I get my calls almost every day, and I live for our visits. Hes 180 miles away and I do whatever it takes to see my man. Just to see his face come through the door and the way he smiles and hugs me so tight, makes it all worth it. I get to see him Saturday and Sunday from 9:00 to 3:00. I get to see him this weekend Yeah!!! I miss him so much when I don't go. But then I miss him all the time.

Babieboo...I hear you. I am sorry to hear that you haven't seen your man.
Marcus was there for 10 before I saw him. I hadn't seen him since I was 13.
When we finally grew closer....I couldn't wait until he put me on the list.
He is only 100 miles from me in Beaumont,Tx...so those years we weren't in a realtionship..I tryt to make up for by going every weekend!! :) Although it's non-contact it' still feels good to see his face.
You should qualify as a special visit because you are from another state...he should be able to put in a request for it. Tell that man to get that paperwork started!! :)

It has been 10 year for me also. I visit any where from two to three times a year, we are in differnet states. Whe I do go it is for a special visit so get a 4hr visit. This used to be on Sat. & Sun. but they have decided one day is enough. We get no phone calls unless you call a 5min call once every 90 days, if you are lucky.It is great to be able to talk to him face to face, touch and get those all important hugs and kisses . Well worth the trips!!
how hard has in been the last ten year ? how do you cope ?my husband has got 20 years and he's only been down now for just over a year, but i did get my first visit 2 weeks ago but now their in lockdown because someone got killed in the gym

I go every saturday,and when he gets moved to a different POD i go on that POD's day.. we usually get an hour,but it depends on what time you go in. If i go in at noon we get almost 2 hours. so that is when i go. its a non contact visit,but it still is a benefit for the both of us..we both live the first part of the week to get that day of visitation. He says he spends his whole day getting excited about calling me before he goes to bed. :)Our visits mean a lot to us, if we didnt have them,i think we would both go nuts! You really need to go visit your man hun...it would make things a lil easier! I miss him...

~*MatthewsBabygirl

It takes a strong woman to be able to endure not seeing there man only to have letters not even phone calls you are truly a superwoman.

I get to see my man 4 times in one week then the next week we don't have any. So it's about 8 times per month. The visits are from 10 am to 6:45 pm! 10 years is a long time to go writing someone without ever having met! Are you his woman ? do you have a relationship that requires you to remain faithful?

Ahhh Babieboo, I'm really sorry you're not able to see your man. I know you must miss him so. There's a 274 mile distance between me and my sweetie so I only visit him every two weeks. Of course if we were closer I'd see him every weekend. When driving to see him I have time to reflect on us and enjoy the scenery. The closer I get to seeing him my heart skips a beat and I get all nervous. Then once there we lock eyes on each other and it's as if no one else is there but us. We laugh, we talk, and sometimes I shed a tear or two. With the letter writings and the visits, it keeps us closer and our relationship that much better. I'm the only one who writes him and visits him and if any of those things would stop, he'd be very disappointed and lonely so I do it more for him than myself. I have my freedom so for him to be able to get a feeling of home and love from his woman is that much greater.

I go visit the love of my life twice a month for 4 hours at a time and i must say those 4 hours are happiest times of my life and it always seems to drag and i feel like i've been there for days. I love everything about our visits except one thing, the end. I will be there this sunday to see my baby.

once a month, it used to be everyday until he was transferred :( i cherish every second i get with him

When he was at the county he got two visits a week, not only did I use those two, he knew a couple of other guys who never got visits and we would use their names to visit. I would say I was seeing so and so, and when they called that guys name Al came out - the officers didn't ever say anything - we were very blessed. That was two years ago.

Since he went to New Folsom, I visit every weekend, some Thurs & Fridays when they had visiting on those days, Sat & Sun about 6 hours each day, for the past two years (with about two months of no visits). The only time I'm not there is if there is a lockdown but we've only had a few visits not happen because of that. We have been so blessed, he is only 20 minutes away from me - although I would travel any distance to be with him.

I can't imagine not having my visits and I know when we don't have them he is really affected by them as well as I am. For those of you that don't visit often or not at all, I am very impressed with your level of dedication and love. It is truly commendable.

Lana

To visit is like a first date. Your stomach is in knots,you primp in the mirror till your exactly right. Then the minute he comes out that door and you see his smile you know exactly how very much he loves you. The time flies hours seem like molments. Then when you hug good-bye, your entire body rejects the fact that you have to let go. I am not ashamed of my feelings. It has been a year we have been visiting and I still ball my eyes out all the way home. If you take a picture with him it becomes your most prized possestion worth more than your weight in diamonds. But if your lve is true you'll go back as often as you can, just to see that smile and feel those minutes of joy you get just from holding his hand and hearing him say "I love you" while your in his arms.
The pain is worth it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

When my husband was in the jail I saw him twice a week. Much simpler
cause that was our hometown. Now after sentencing he is in East Texas.
Five hundred miles round trip. There are no phone calls. The visits are non
contact through a glass with a phone. I go once a week for two hours.
That's it. That's all that's allowed.

Babieboo,
10 Years And No Visit! Thats Nuts Girl, We Need To Get U On A Plane. I Understand That Living In Two Diffrebt States Can Make It Harder, But Sometimes You Just Go To Get Up And Go! I Live In Ca And Froggys Is In Il. So Thats About 2000 Miles In Distance, But That Doesnt Stop Me. I Have Only Seem Him 1 Time But I Was There For 8 Days, And Sw Him Maybe Six Of The 8( Cause Him Mom Kiddnapped Me) Other Than That I Had A Great Time, It Was Cold, And Alot Diffrent From California But I Still Did It. Im Going Again This May, May 23-30! Lol So To Answer Your Question I Have See Him 2 Times......

Go See Him Girl!

Babieboo...go and see him ....ich wish i was just in another state...call over there and ask about your visitionrights or look it up on the net...where is he at??
I might can send you the link where you can read up on it-.are you on his visitation list?? Has it been aproved??

I go twice a week for a 30min visit.

I only see my Son maybe once a year...because i live in Germany.
And i seen my Son for the first time in 20 years last year march for two weekends...and they would not give me any more privliges to see him
now he is in CM III so i don´t know if i get to see him this Year

WOW I really admire all of you that do not get to visit and stick by your man. It took me a year to visit my Reggie. I can understand what can happen I just did not have the money and his prison is 300 miles away. now I have a job and a new car so it makes it a lot easier. I also got to meet some of the regulars up there at SVSP and have a great carpool buddy. Now I visit once a month and sometimes I have to wait 2 months it is very exspensive here in Ca the gas is 211 a gallon so carpooling is the way to go. I wish all of you the best I love to hear your stories keep up the good work and I hope you get to visit soon. take care

Beth/ Loved one at Salinas Valley St prison Ca

I know I need to go....Lord willing I will see him very soon.

I go and see my man twice a week for 5 hours each day, the most you can visit, and I don't know what I would do if i didn't have visits, I would go crazy.

girl youneed to go visit him it would mean the workd to him and you !!!well my first vizzo is this weekend and i am so excited but i plan to visit him every weekend

Twice a month at the very least. I started slacking for awhile since the weather was bad and his prison is seriously in the middle of nowhere. But I will be getting back on track now that the nicer weather is here and it will be a nice ride, instead of a dangerous drive.
Two times a week, every other week.

I have'nt seen my sweetie in 10 months.We were'nt allowed to visit while he was in county cause we are not related.We are in the process of trying to get contact visits.He has'nt had a visitor since he's been in.He has no family on his visitation list.He is 7 hrs.away from me.I cry everyday cause i miss him SO bad!Can't hardly wait to be able to hug & kiss him!!!

I have'nt seen my sweetie in 10 months.We were'nt allowed to visit while he was in county cause we are not related.We are in the process of trying to get contact visits.He has'nt had a visitor since he's been in.He has no family on his visitation list.He is 7 hrs.away from me.I cry everyday cause i miss him SO bad!Can't hardly wait to be able to hug & kiss him!!!

Well it has not been 10 months since I have seen my Baby its been 2. But I do get to see him next weekend. I am so glad I really miss him.

Well it has not been 10 months since I have seen my Baby its been 2. But I do get to see him next weekend. I am so glad I really miss him. Enjoy your visit!!!:) Do yall get get contact visits?

yeah we get contact visits do you??? It is pretty nice they have food vendors who bring in good food for us to share with our loved ones, salad fresh vegies philliy cheese sandwiches cheese cake and so on. visiting is from 8:30 to 3:00 so I get about 6 good hours with him. I am going to try to visit more but with the gas sky high it is hard you have to carpool. the prison is 4 and a half hours away. I am very greatful for our time together that it for sure.

reggies girl,

No we don't get contact visits.We are working on getting that approved.Hopefully it won't be much longer.We are in Texas so it's hard to get contact visits if your not family.