:pissed: you know I have a hard time talking to people who havent a clue about having a loved one in prison ..does anyone else have this problem???I hate when I try to tell my friends or familiy about a cute letter or visit they are so quick to go negative...if I say he wrote the nicest letter ..they start with of course he doesnt have anything else to do :argh dont you hate that ..or yeah they all say that ..just because hes locked up ...I hate that and I am just happy why cant they be supportive ..and say wow thats nice ..but know right away if you say someone is in prison they give you the ooohh look like your some desperate crazy chick waiting...hey I am alone because I choose to be ..not because I cant get someone ..just so happens my mans in jail ..SOO WHAT ..right away they think hes jeffery damer..or somthing ..every one makes mistakes so what we have to look down on them because of a wrong dicision or what ...anyhow the more people I talk to I find them so closed minded that I prefer to come here ..where I can relate and people understand ...THANKS YOU GUYS :)

I think that we all go through the same feelings about this ... I was at a dinner this last weekend and the usual question came out - What did he do? To which I answered - no offence is intended by this answer but he 'broke the law' and if you want more detail you can ask him. This did not go over well but I don't give a ____ anymore. I know who supports me and I don't care if anyone new in my life does not. They do not know my Partner and I am not going to allow them to judge him based on a crime or a label. If they are not open minded enough look past the "Prisoner Label" then I have no time for them.

The members here - if no one else does - understand!

Happy to have you join us!

First of all welcome to PTO Luisychris !!!!
I understand completely. I agree with Teb~ I know who supports us in our relationship and if people don't then that's their problem :)
Don't let it get to you~ We are always here for you !!!!

Which prison/jail is your man at luisychris? Just wondering........
I know what you mean....I am so sick and tired of people saying such negative stuff about our men, just cuz they are locked up. They have no right to judge them, just because they are in jail/prison. Do they know them? Nope....so how can you judge someone that you dont even know? You can't........then they think we are crazy for waiting? It took me 24 years of my life, to find my soulmate....I think that I can wait another 4 years to be with him....At least I know that he is the one!!!

:cuffs: Sometimes it gets me down. Our drama is so much different than other people's that's why PTO is in exsistence! I just had a discussion with a good friend about this earlier. People cannot understand what we are going through. Not that many people come into contact with this part of this system, that's the way it is designed. Therefore if they cannot relate to it, they cannot have compassion for it. Even when they are just asking questions trying to get information, they can say things that are very hurtful for us because we are right in the middle of it. We just gotta hold on and figure out which people's opinions matter to us. ;)

I completely can relate. :( Everyone thinks I should wash my hands of him. They have no clue why he did what he did, nor do they care. It seems to make people feel better about themselves and their own flaws when they judge others.....it is amazing how many people would be in the same predicament.....only difference is they weren't caught.

You all seem so dedicated and understanding. I feel bad because I am wondering if my husband is going to go back and do the same things when he gets out. My Dad did & my brother is. I am wondering if prison visitation is the best thing for my kids - How do you all stay so focused and trusting and hopeful? Am I the only one who has a husband who was screwed up BEFORE he got to prison? I'm just scared to put in all this time being devoted and faithful - sending love and money, when he could go back to drugs and prison again when this is all over.