The past two weeks have been totle hell for me. James got into trouble and just kept making it worse every time he opened his mouth. He's already been locked up for 6 years(5 in county waiting trial and 1 already done on his sentence in prison) and I guess it all finally got to him and he just snapped. The prison where he's at can make that happen to a man. It's probably the worst facility gaurd wise in the whole state of Florda. He will be in confinement for a total of 11 months. He's trying to appeal the last three but I don't think it will happen cause he's been threatened by the warden before. I knew this was gonna be hard. But it seems to be getting worse. Last year went by so fast and now this year has started out so bad and is dragging by. I won't be allowed to visit or even talk to him aside from letters for the rest of the year. We were gonna get maried on April 3rd, but now the Sgt at the facility he's at told him its not gonna happen there. I know we have so many more years to go, but does it ever get easier or does it just continue to get worse? I just continue to pray God continues to give me the strength to get through this. I know I love him and I want this to work. i just can't believe he did something so stupid. Spikeswife

I'm sorry you're going through such a rough time. Big hugs.
We're here for you.

(((((HUG)))))

I'm sure you find lot of support and caring people here.

Susan

My heart goes out to you. I don't know what to say. I am blessed in that I have not had to deal with this type of issue . . . yet. I firmly believe that it could be just a matter of time for all of us because the stress in there is so overwhelming that there is just a time bomb waiting to go off every day. If you want to talk, you can pm me--although I am sure you have LOTS of support on here. In the meantime, I will try to send you some good karma thoughts.

I am sorry this is hard right now and to tell the truth it does not get any easier...but you will learn how to deal with it better and you will get stronger..You just have to stay strong but dont be afraid to cry. You have much support here and peers who are going thru similar situations...I hope everything works out and know that we are here for you! (((hugs)))

keep strong both of you.

(((Hugs)))

First off, I have to say that I love all your Dale Jr. pics! I'm a huge race fan and can't wait for the Bud Shootout this weekend! :D

Anyway, I know exactly how you feel. For the first 31 months that Travis was locked up, I only got to see him one time. Once. I went up for a second visit after I moved cross-country to be with him and they told me they had just taken him to ad-seg about 20 minutes before I got there (after a 5 1/2 hour drive!). It was awful. He was locked down in the hole for 13 months and they didn't approve my special visits until he had already been in there for 10 months.

It is hard, and it's gonna be hard... but things will get better. Keep hanging in there and coming here for support. I wish I had words to say to make it better, but all I can tell you is I feel for you and I understand. Eventually, he will get it and he won't want to do stupid things that risk your visits, or good time or anything like that.

And, before you know it, Christmas will be coming again and you'll be like, another year's gone already? :)

Hang in there!

The 11 months is going to be really hard on you and him, so I suggest both of you write as much as possible. You've go to keep the communication going no matter what. You both will go through a whole range of emotions and will not always be in sync. Early on, my boyfriend did some confinement-type of time. He literally went crazy some days, but I think he came out stronger and more compassionate.

Come here to us long-timers for support whenever you need to! Most of us here understand that its possible (and human) to be angry and disappointed and feel helpless and hopeless somedays, but still love the person in our lives whose locked up.

My heart feels for ya, thats for sure... I agree with MrsP however in that you must keep that communication going even if you cant see each other.... It will some days be what holds BOTH of you together. I can honestly say, while my guy has been down 6 years, I havent had to, nor has he had to deal with this type of situation yet... Some days however I have to beg him to stay calm when he is ready to explode.... I cannot say given the same circumstances, i myself wouldnt want to explode from time to time.... Just do your very best in the next 11 months to assure him that one day, all of this will be behind you, he is going to need your support now probably more then ever being confined even more so then he is normally, over the next months.... assure him that you are still there for him, even if you cant see each other... it works wonders. As for it getting any easier.... I think we all have the times when it seems to be easier, and the times that it is the hardest thing you could ever imagine going through. I certainly have felt many diffrent ways at diffrent times. Keep your chin up, and know that this too, shall pass.

I wish you all the best... stay strong....Believe
Witty

Thank you all for the kind words and moral support. We have been writing everyday. He's actaully been sending sometimes two letters at a time. I know the letters are going to be so very important. He's trying to make this right and he feels so bad for hurting me. I have showed him I'm still here and I'm still supporting him. I was very hurt when I first found out and never came out and said that I was. But as his letters got more scared that I was gone, he wore me down. I know God would not have faced me with this situation if he didn't think I could handle it. But why does it have to be so hard at times. What really blows my mind is to hear all the peole I work with grip about their relationships and then question me about how long I am going to wait for James. I do believe that this seperation will make us stronger. I'm glad I decided to visit the long term section of PTO. Thank you all for listening I'm just not use to all of this yet. Every time the phone rings i pray its him. I wake up in the morning and think this was all just a sick dream and I'm still planning a wedding. Well I have some time to get use to it. And I'm sure it will be the sweetest sound I've ever heard when I do get to talk to him again. And i'm sure that some of you don't get to talk at all either for what ever reason, so I don't mean to make a big deal. We just talked almost everyday for the past 3 years. So I don't mean to offend. :) OOPS Got alittle winded again. Sorry, but thanks for being here.
Spikeswife