Here is a poem I found on the internet written by a prisoner on Death Row. It explains my feelings today perfect. I AM SO TIRED!!!.

THIS EMPTY NEST


What appears on the outside,
a happy, out-going person,
always wearing a smile when they greet you,
a warm sense humors.
Life appears to be perfect, no worries at all!!
Life appears to be perfect, no wrorries at al!!
But..
You don't see within, the lonely heart, the cries for compassion,
the need to be loved,
the silent tears that fall
While covering up the hurt inside.
Maybe one day all the pain will become joy....
But..until that day
Things will remain as they are within.
THIS EMPTY NEST.

By Jermont Cox

I am so, so, tired guys.

Joy-i think you have found something that i would be willing to bet each and every one of us on here can relate to.

Thanks

Sherri

Joy....
I definitely feel you... This Easter has just not been much of a holiday for me... I don't really have any contact with my parents (they don't like me much.... :(), which means at holidays, I am cut off from my extended family as well... Was thinking last week when I left JD that I would be able to go back this weekend (I had been told he could have 4 visits a month... and that's what I told him)... but that ended up not being true... he can only have 2 a month.... I have spent the day kind of moping and longing for time to hurry up so I can have that life that I so often dream of but which seems to always be just out of my grasp like the proverbial carrot in front of my nose. I too get tired of chasing it and feel some days like I am never going to get there.... I also know it has to get better... it can't rain forever....

Wow! I am feeling the same way today..This is the first of a string of holidays that I will be "alone"..eventhough I am with my family I still feel alone and empty..I just want this time to be over already so I can have that "wonderful" life with Stephen that we are so looking foward to and dreaming and talking of....oooh! to be wrapped in his arms...smell his cologne...feel his sweet touch...I never was a patient waiter...well I agree Jds-it cant rain forever..it will get better!!