Okay ... hey well I am new to all of this but not new to my man being away . He has been in Lansing east for the last 32 months and we still have about 5 months left . My prob or question is about parole . We lived in oklahoma when he went into prison but his crime was in kansas .We are not married but plan to be once he is out . However I am still here in Oklahoma and we'd like for him to be able to come back to oklahoma . We were told that in order to do this he'd have to porole to a family member here in oklahoma . But he has no family but me and we really dont want to have to have him go to a half way house or anything like that . Does anyone Know what we can do ? Or has anyone had this problem ??? I need help bad .. if you have any answers it would be great ... please send me a message or somthing .. Thank You

It seems that if you were his wife, they'd have to allow him to parole to you. I truly understand that you probably don't want to get married in prison, plus it would take you finding someone to perform the marriage, getting the license, getting up here-a lot fo details. That could be expensive. You could move to KS, but that could also be expensive and an incovenience to you if you don't know anyone here and would have to find a new job. I really wish I had an easy answer for you but I don't. I'm married to my husband and since have moved to MO from KS, but I'm a nurse so finding a job is never really difficult for me, even in this troubled economy. I will keep you in my prayers and hope you find an solution soon!

Thank so mush for replying to my problem ! We have talked about getting married while he is there but then decided thats not the place we want to start our marriage . Not that it is a bad thing to get married there don't get me wrong ! Its just not us . Ive also thought about the move to kansas but I have a great job here . And my mother passed away almost a year ago leaving my 10 year old brother so thats been hard him in prison when all this happen. Now having my little brother to think about so Oklahoma is is just the best place for us to be ! Grr why does all this have to be so hard . You'd think them being gone would be the worst of it but really there is always so much more that comes along with it is'nt there ...

In order for them to go to another state like that they have to do an Interstate Compact. I'm in New Mexico and my common law husband is there in Kansas for us its been a major ordeal and you have to start the process like 6 months before they get out. We started the process as soon as we could and it still wasn't approved when he got out so he ended up right there in Kansas with no family and no support and ended up right back in prison again. This time we're getting married and he's trying to start the process right away. Good luck!

I live in California and my now husband is in Kansas. We got married while he was in prison because he wanted to come back here. I did all the reading on Interstate Compact. First we did the common law marriage but that was not good enough for the Interstate Compact. We did not really want to get married in prison but we did not want to be separted for another 18 months with him in Kansas and me here. It wasnt that bad the wedding. My husbands release date is 4/10 and we already have the paper work in for the Interstate Compact. Marry him you can always have another one once he is out. I got married in Lansing. If you need any help let me know.

Laura

Hey girl's thanks for all you thought's its helped alot ! My man put the form in for us to get married a few days ago .So..... no im just waiting for the paper work . I still have alot of worries though . Like maybe we waited to long .Since he is getting out in Nov .Or what all I will need to do to even get the ball rolling on this . Its hard for me to even see him since I am almost 7 hours away from him .. But I will do what ever it takes not to be away from him any longer than I have to . I knew him being in prison was going to be hard .But I never relized it was going to be this hard . It has been the worst 2 years of my life and like the rest of you I am ready for this to be over and behind us !! So hopefully us getting married will be the right thing . Wish me luck lol !!!

I know what you mean about being far away, I would love to be just 7 hours away. I am very glad that we did get married. The Interstate Compact takes 120 days. It took me 4 months from when I got the paperwork to get married. Good luck.

Laura

One answer is pretty simple, but it takes some effort on both your parts. Have him talk to his team leader and get paperwork started for an Interstate CORRECTIONS compact. This will transfer him to OK. He will still be under KS law and sentencing, but he can serve his time in OK. Then when he gets out he will have an easier time getting paroled to you there. His team leader will file forms and if approved through the system it will go to Liz Rice in Topeka. From there it gets sent to OK for approval. With KS having the budget they do right now it might be a good time. There are certain rules that have to be followed and his behavior has to be good for the transfer. If you have any other questions please feel free to ask. This process DOES work. Mine was in a different state and got moved here.

Let me add that if he is for sure getting out in Nov. If you are guessing Nov then it might be something to look into.

Well I got a phone call from my man tonight .. we have'nt been able to talk for about a week because I am having some problems with the phone company and my account . Anyway so when he called he was mad because he had been trying to call for days and I tried to explain to him the reason then he said that he had spoke to his sister about parole to her house which is here in the town I live in ..So he wanted to try that first before we go with the marriage thing !! So now I don't know what to do ? I am worried that his sister is going to fall threw , plus they are not really close and she is'nt really trustworthy so Im also worried she will back out of the deal anyway .And then getting married will be to late ! Should I tell him no that we need to just do the marriage thing ??? What do I do ?? I am for sure his release date is in Nov ..As long as he keeps himself out of trouble !!!!!!!! And so thats another thing we are down to not much time .. So I am freaking out ! lol I just dont know the answers !