View Full Version : PLEASE HELP!!! Gulf CI Annex (haven't heard from my husband)


Proud_Navy_Wife
12-15-2008, 07:43 PM
Please if anyone gets phone calls from thier loved one at Gulf CI Annex. I need to get a message to my husband. I have had no contact with him for over 2 weeks. No calls, no letters, nothing. I have called up there and all I get is conflicting stories from the chaplains office. My husband has always called a couple times a night. And I get letters every other day. Now everything is SILENT! I am so scared. Not to mention I miss his voice. If someone would please respond to this thread. Please, he is my heart and soul. All I have done for weeks is cry. I need to have contact with him somehow. Please respond!!!

ben's girl
12-15-2008, 07:49 PM
Have you called and talked with his Classification Officer to find out if he in confinement? If not, that's the first thing I would do. And if he is he probably wasn't allowed to take anything with him so he hasn't been able to write you. Send him stamps, envelopes and paper as soon as you find out.

Proud_Navy_Wife
12-15-2008, 07:53 PM
no he isnt in confinement. i have talked to the chaplains office and they say they have seen him in his classes. but yet he hasnt even used any of his money in almost 3 weeks. that is NOT like him.

ricoswifey
12-15-2008, 10:36 PM
Hey, I'd still call classification just to make sure...because maybe he didn't do anything wrong but he could be in administrative confinement under investigation or protective custody. What i'd do is speak to 2 different people and see if u get the same story, just to be sure...If my hubby was there i'd ask him to give a msg but he is in holmes...I hope everything is ok...

ben's girl
12-16-2008, 07:01 AM
Right, I'd still call Classification as that's not primarily what the Chaplain is for. I hope everything turns out ok.

BenisMom
12-16-2008, 08:58 PM
Please if anyone gets phone calls from thier loved one at Gulf CI Annex. I need to get a message to my husband. I have had no contact with him for over 2 weeks. No calls, no letters, nothing. I have called up there and all I get is conflicting stories from the chaplains office. My husband has always called a couple times a night. And I get letters every other day. Now everything is SILENT! I am so scared. Not to mention I miss his voice. If someone would please respond to this thread. Please, he is my heart and soul. All I have done for weeks is cry. I need to have contact with him somehow. Please respond!!!

I hope you get an answer soon, my thoughts & prayers are with you.

Proud_Navy_Wife
12-17-2008, 12:16 PM
thanks everyone but i still havent heard from him. he isnt in confinement. :confused:

noreason
12-17-2008, 12:30 PM
are you two allowed communication I thought I read that you were the victim

ricoswifey
12-17-2008, 12:31 PM
...Sorry to hear that, i know how u must feel cuz i worry like crazy!...And did u check to make sure your line is clear? Good luck, i hope u hear something soon...Maybe u could call and speak to medical and make sure he isn't hurt or anything..

Proud_Navy_Wife
12-19-2008, 11:20 AM
thanks everyone... line is clear. just no communication for some reason. it has to be something he is going thru. yes we are allowed contact. just as the victim i can't visit.

Don Quixote
12-21-2008, 04:00 PM
OP, are you aware that anyone who was willing to pass a message onto your inmate would be breaking the rules and thus potentially getting their own phone/visit curtailed.

My suggestion is that you simply keep writing your letters and wait for him to respond. He may be in confinement. He may also have done something he isn't proud of and is distancing himself from you because of it. Most of the time when that is the case, the inmate will respond again at some point if they've still received encouraging and not too frantic mails.

My guess is that you have up until now communicated by telephone. Maybe you should write the warden and describe what your previous contact has been and indicate that the classification officer has said he is in class. Ask the warden if there is a problem in the mail room. Ask the warden if he will check the welfare of the inmate (since he would not have stopped abruptly without telling you).

I think you can ask who else is on the visitation list. Call whomever it is and ask if they have seen him recently.

I'm sorry you are so stressed. Sometimes we just have to pray, when we find ourselves in your spot.

Proud_Navy_Wife
12-21-2008, 07:41 PM
DQ, no I wasn't aware I wasn't allowed to pass messages. Wow, thats crazy. I have made many calls that he has asked me to do for others in there that don't talk to thier family, you know like hey aunt so and so send so and so money. Those type of calls.
Honestly, I think he is going thru some heavy depression with the holidays. So, yes you are right in saying he is in a withdraw mode. I keep writing, keep sending cards, our kids keep writing. I pray every day morning and night that whatever he is going thru that God seems him out of it. I know "this shall too pass" as the Bible says but it is hard not talking to him. Thanks for the information and keep us in your prayers. Merry Christmas. May God bless you.

Griegito
12-22-2008, 09:53 AM
I am so sorry you are going thru so much stress and anxiety over this and I can totally relate as I too go thru all the frantic motions when I don't hear from him. You have every right to be concerned and as far as getting a msg to him... I wouldn't worry too much about it... sooner or later he will get in touch. That's usually a given... you just have to pray to God that he is okay and ask for the faith that keep you from getting impatient and loosing your mind. Usually after I have been crazy like that... when I do hear from him... he is okay. I pray that is the case also with your loved one. Be strong and stay sane. Keep your faith and believe that he is okay. I will say a prayer for you as well.

Proud_Navy_Wife
12-22-2008, 02:59 PM
Thanks for the encouraging words. It's so hard not having that someone you can turn to and talk about "jail things". I have totally committed my life to him and that has left a bit of emptiness when I do't have him to talk to at night. People who do not have families incarcerated do not understand that "your" life is at a stand still. I miss him so much. I appreciate this group yet I wish there was more of an active group that women could get together with talk, cry and celebrate. I do have a couple women I have met thru this forum that we talk often and I thank God that He has brought them into my life. :) Merry Christmas everyone!

Don Quixote
12-27-2008, 12:31 PM
Some people deal with this by writing in journals.

And some come to understand that a life that solely revolves around another person whose choices they cannot control and are not consistently good, are rarely healthy. Please find a way to be whole on your own. Grow, learn, be involved in in projects and activities which lift and inspire you. If you only focus on the person who is locked up, you will not be as well-equipped to help him when he returns, nor to hold him accountable for his actions involving you, nor to thrive without him, if it comes to that.

You deserve a life of your own full of good things, not just a support group where everyone sits around crying and talking about inmates.

mccuneday
12-27-2008, 04:57 PM
Well said!!

Proud_Navy_Wife
12-28-2008, 02:27 PM
As much I do appreciate your advice DQ it is quite obvious that you don't know me personally. I have 2 great teens that are involved in various activities that I am involved with as well. I am Branch Manager of a successful business as well as an active church member serving on many different boards. I'd like to personally burst your bubble when I say I haven't crawled in a hole and died. Maybe my previous post might have seemed that way but that is not the case. I just happen to be a women who loves her husband no matter his mistakes. As a christian I know what forgiveness is about. I miss my daily talks with my husband terribly. I sned him letters and cards almost everyday because I support him no matter what he is going thru. I'm sticking by my man!!! I'm not some pathetic, dumb, uneducated girl who is hopelessly in love. So I'm sorry that you stereo typed me. But thanks again for all of your advice.:)

PS I have heard from him by the way.

noreason
12-28-2008, 02:56 PM
-Proud Navy Wife -It does sound like you over-reacted to what was said--I re-read what DQ wrote and I didnt get the pathetic-dumb-uneducated girl thing from it at all---sounds to me like you are in a bit of a stressfull situation and read more into than was meant to be---Take a deep breath--we are here to help--there is no sterotype we all our sticking by our inmates----Glad you heard from him--sorry you were offended

Griegito
12-29-2008, 01:55 PM
The OP posted here only to relieve herself of the stress she was feeling at being powerless to do anything about her situation... as I know I have had that same feeling. As is always the case, someone... had to take it a step further and offer unsolicited psycholgical advice... while it may not have been intended to offend... it was still unsolicited and frankly, not very helpful to the OP's situation. I just wish people would make an effort to stick to the topic and do not offer critiques on someone's perceived state of mind or emotional health. It may not be meant as such... but it often comes off as "JUDGMENT" which I think we have all had enough of, no? Anyway, Sailor's wife... I am very glad you have heard from your man and for what it is worth I do believe you are a very strong and accomplished woman who should be commended for standing by your man... regardless of his past mistakes. God Bless to all and Good luck.

ricoswifey
12-29-2008, 03:44 PM
The OP posted here only to relieve herself of the stress she was feeling at being powerless to do anything about her situation... as I know I have had that same feeling. As is always the case, someone... had to take it a step further and offer unsolicited psycholgical advice... while it may not have been intended to offend... it was still unsolicited and frankly, not very helpful to the OP's situation. I just wish people would make an effort to stick to the topic and do not offer critiques on someone's perceived state of mind or emotional health. It may not be meant as such... but it often comes off as "JUDGMENT" which I think we have all had enough of, no? Anyway, Sailor's wife... I am very glad you have heard from your man and for what it is worth I do believe you are a very strong and accomplished woman who should be commended for standing by your man... regardless of his past mistakes. God Bless to all and Good luck.

I agree... although i'm sure the person giving the advice didn't mean to come off as offensive it did come off a bit as judgement...AND YES!! We have had enough of that lol...I've heard it all---stupid for waiting for him, he'll never change, move on..etc. I'm with him, I had the choice to walk away but I decided to stay. I know during this long road I've felt helpless at times and sometimes we need to just let it out. But anywho, I'm sure none of us on here really mean to be judgemental:idea:.. I am glad you heard from him and hope all is well.

mccuneday
12-29-2008, 04:47 PM
I'm also glad you heard from your man. it's a long journey for all of us but we need to stay strong and be here for eachother. when i said well said iwas not referring to your situation i was referring to the comment dq made about having your own life itmay not pertain to you individually but it does pertain to some people myself included. When my son first got sentenced my life stopped i spent every minute of my day on the phone with attorneys,judges,tally,reception center and anyone that would listen to me and then i had to realize that i had a life also. so there are people out there that this does happen to and i appreciate sometimes when people remind me that i am a person and i have my own life to worry about also. despite that i support my son and stand by him no matter what. and i'm glad i spent all that time on my son he had a sentence reduction from 10yrs to 4 yrs withheld adjudification with held had i not been so persisent his life would have been ruined. thanks again everyone for being here for me!!

Proud_Navy_Wife
12-30-2008, 07:40 AM
Hey Thanks Griegto!!! and others as well. You know sometimes when people are just a little on the edge the slightest comment came be taken wrong. Then when we add that this is a typed conversation and there is no tones, it does get hard sometimes to tell how people are really responding to you. Beings, that I knew I was a "little" (lol) emotional at the time of reading DQ's post I made a point to say IF I was taken anything out of context.
As in any forum there are those out there that are genuienly there to help and those who are there to stir the pot. NOT SAYING THAT DQ IS STIRRING ANYTHING. Yes, I was wanting to vent my frustrations and I'm so glad for those who had objective comments. Sometimes it does help to hear an outsiders point of view. When you become so tunnel visioned on your roblem you can't see the simple answer. I think most of us on here are here to help one another and get help when we need it. I know that is my reason. I don't have anyone outside (except for a couple girls I have met on here) to really talk to about my new life. People who do not live this life do not always understand what is it is like.
I do have my own life going on out here but I also do have that other part of me that is on stand by. New Years Eve is tomorrow night, most have dates and have someone to kiss at midnight. I will be alone. So, will most of us. That sucks! Only we can realize what that really feels like.
Anyways, my feelings aren't hurt... Gotta be bigger than that. :rolleyes: LOL I have appreciated getting to know you and am sure I will be on here often. Hoping that I can help as I have been helped.