I am going to my love's parole hearing as his support. It is on July 2nd and I am terrified. I fell naseaus when I start to think of it because I don't know what to expect.

Will they talk to me or just acknowledge that I am there for support? Has anyone ever gone as the support? Argh. Is there somewhere I can find information.

If I am this nervous...I can only imagine how he feels.

here's a bit of info about going to a hearing, though some of the info is different, as it's about being an observer: http://www.npb-cnlc.gc.ca/infocntr/factsh/observe.htm

Hearings can be nerve racking for everyone some days. Sometimes, they will only want to confirm you as a support and this usually depends on the amount of info they already have on you as a support (like a community assessment or the nature of the support). Before a guy goes up for a hearing, he is asked if he would like an assistant. The assistant is a bit more involved but only in that they can have an opportunity to speak at some point. If you're the only support going to the hearing, they will consider you the assistant and you will have a chance to say something. If there's many people going, they will ask one person to be assigned and the rest are asked to keep any comments brief. The only time they might ask you some questions is if they weren't clear on info or type of support you are.

There's two different kinds of hearings, your standard and the Elder assisted. A hearing officer will go over the formalities before the hearing and can answer some questions then.

Some advice: Don't load up on coffee, try to get some sleep and expect to be waiting for a bit. Don't get hung up on the little details but listen to the questions being asked, even if they're not asking you.

I am going to be going as his assisant. I found that out yesterday. I had a community assessment but I know they had some minor concerns about his exit plan due to some assault charges way back when.

To counter this I came up with a safety plan. Do you know what types of things they will ask. I am not sure that I want to speak...lol. I am so freaked out about it.

Any help, ideas, suggestions would be great. It's so soon.

I would put down in writing everything you want to say and read it as a statement at the end of the question period with the inmate.

I know easier said than done, but you will have to do your best to pull it together and show strenght and confidence. You want to show the board that you are 100% behind making his release plan work.

Is there anyone else going as support observers? I think it helps if the board can see he has family/friends behind him.

Are any victims attending? That can throw a wrench in if they read impact statements.

Good Luck tomorrow and please let us know how it goes.

How did it go?

It was postponed and after finding out some information, additional restrictions and such it was a blessing. We are withdrawing our application - it would have been nice to have him home a bit earlier but parole would not have been good.

So we have 7 1/2 more months and then we just have to deal with the probation order - which we know what the conditions are on there.

Thanks for asking though.

Did I mention I hate the system and the fricking hoops you have to jump through.