Has Anyone Ever Had A No Contact With Their Spouse As A Special Condition Changed? & If So How?

Go to the DV (domestic violence) unit in your county and speak to an officer there. They will help you fill out the paperwork to have it dropped. You will have to go before the judge, and the final decision will be his/hers. Usually they want to know what steps have been taken to avoid this happening again. They will also have you sit with a counselor to make sure that you understand that once the order is dropped, you are no longer protected. Of course, if something should happen you can go back and ask the court for another order of protection. I will tell you that the court does not appreciate someone who requests these orders, only to drop them and if it is done repeatedly then the judge is less likely to grant your request. The court takes these very seriously due to the increase in violence against women.

What if you fear losing your kids by having the Order of Protection dropped? I was made by CPS to sign an agreement to have an OP put in place and told by the domestic violence unit who "helped" me fill out the paper work how to word it and what to say. It told them that the only reason I was doing it was to keep from losing my kids and having my family ripped apart. I don't feel like I have a choice.

The question is - why did they feel you needed the order? If there was violence in the home, then you will need to jump through a whole lot of hoops. They will NOT take a chance with the kids, so each of you might have to prove that you have been through effective counseling and are approved by the therapists to be together.

But if you can't have contact with your partner how do you find out if they're willing to go through counseling...we were trying to get couples couseling set up before he went in. Do we have to do it through the lawyers?

Couples counseling is dangerous for you. YOU. Never try that with a batterer. You will sit there in a counseling session, assume that you are part of the problem and open your heart. He will gather information on what you see as your contribution and use it to berate and beat you more (especially if you point out any of HIS problems, because that is disrespectful).

Couples counseling is dangerous for you. YOU. Never try that with a batterer. You will sit there in a counseling session, assume that you are part of the problem and open your heart. He will gather information on what you see as your contribution and use it to berate and beat you more (especially if you point out any of HIS problems, because that is disrespectful).

I would like to add, that this is a boyfriend you are talking about, not a spouse. Is this something you really want to move on with since you haven't even married the guy yet?!! Oh girl, look at the past you have had with him, before trying to make a future. If it isn't good now, during the honeymoon stage, what makes you think professionals will fix things? Get another group to fixate on, like a women's domestic violence group. You are grasping at straws. They won't fix him, and you can't either. The sooner you realize that, the sooner you can get on with life the way it should be lived, not trying to fix broken boys, or toys.