my boyfriend is currently in jail, and he's been going to jail AA meetings. what are the chances of an inmate continuing going to regular AA meetings once they're freed? i'm aware that i won't know for sure until he gets out but i'd just like to get a general idea. thanks!

oh and this is assuming he's not going to a halfway house. i don't know anything for sure but rehab/halfway house wasn't one of the outcomes his lawyer told him about.

There aren't super-great odds on any addict sticking with anything but their addiction. If you're that worried, then give him plenty of room when he's out. Whatever you do, don't YOU be the one finding the meetings, times, places. If he's going to do it, he really has to do it alone. You, however, can go to Al-Anon, for yourself. And to learn how to handle relationships with addict.

Nimuay is right, Sari. My BF attended AA in jail and for awhile twice daily out of jail. While he still attends, he's had slips and full-blown relaspses in the last six months that he's been out. It's very hard NOT to be the co-dependent for I'm one myself. He has to want to do it for himself. We have a tendancy to think that if he loves me enough, he'll do it for me. Remember, how much you love someone doesn't take the place of the addictions one carries.

The chances of him staying sober once out is entirely up to his mindset. Remember, he may do great for awhile then out of nowhere, you may get blindsided with a slip or a full-blown relaspse. Don't exhaust yourself with being his co-dependent babysitter.

yeah, that's what i've been told...to not fix things for him. i work with kids so "fixing" things for people is in my blood :rolleyes: . i'll be there to support him, definitely...but he's got to do this on his own.

HI Sari, what are his chances of staying in AA? Well, if he has admitted complete defeat as it says we must do in the Big Book then his chances are great. If he gets out, goes to meetings, gets a sponsor and works the steps, his chances get better. The longer he is sober and working the AA program the better his chances are, but its still only one day at a time. Alcoholics can only have today. Today, by God's Grace and AA I am sober 7 years, all one day at a time.

It would help if he has a contact person so that he can get to a meeting his first day out. It has been proven that those that go to a meeting the first day out have a better chance of sobriety. Those that say, oh I dont need the meetings, Im ok, they are in trouble. I know, I watch on a daily basis those that come to my office from prison and say they dont have a problem only to have a dirty urine at parole, showing there is indeed a problem and even then, some wont admit to a problem.

I will pray for your man. Prayer works wonders too

Cherie'

he is actually supposed to go to a quick program at mt. pleasant next week (yup, my signature is wrong), and then go to a halfway house. so i hope that will be a big help to him, to have people surrounding him that are in the same boat and to have me around, someone who loves him and has faith in him.

thank you for praying for my man, i do appreciate it :)