Good Day Everyone.

I was just curious to know how your system in America works.

I have heard that in some countries the family is not allowed to have the body and the prison buries the person and you are not allowed to be at the burial or visit the grave afterwards.

I think it is very cruel and can really not see why you not allowed to bury your loved one.

Good luck to everyone with a loved one inside.

In our instance, when my son was killed. As soon as Law Enforcement and the Coroner were done they were calling and asking us who we had made arrangements with. I think it's pretty much the norm here, though I have heard of out of state cases not releasing the body untill transportation has been paid.

Tigger Mom

Here in our state if no one claims the body they are buried on prison ground. Inmates help dig the graves.

I would assume the family receives the body. If no family...then buried on prison grounds or a state cemetary. I was faced with a situation (not prison related, but similar)...where this young guy from Equador was working for me...he had no family...no one here. He came for a better life...sending money home to his family. He was killed in a drunken dispute with an older Hispanic male. The morning after the fight...there was an article in the newspaper stating the victim was unidentified...looking for anyone who may have an idea who he was...to come forward. Some of the other guys at work said it was him....so I contacted the police...we made a trip to the hospital where he was. At the time, he was still alive (barely). I did identify him, but had no way of knowing how to contact his family...or even who they were. After keeping in close contact with the hospital...I knew he wouldn't be living much longer & my "motherly instinct" went into overdrive. What could I do? What would I want done if it were my son? I knew he was of Catholic faith...so I called in a priest...for his final rights. After his passing (wich I was present for...extremely difficult)...the state coroners office held his body for 30 days...while detectives search for his family through International money order receipts. We (my employee's & I) had already said if his family couldn't be located...we would all go in together & give him a proper burial. At the end of the 30 days...I contacted the lead detective...to both our surprise...the state took his body & buried him in the city cemetary. It was decent...but not what we had intended. But better than some options. Sometimes, they'll donate their bodies to science. I won't go into detail about the many ways "Science" uses their bodies. *shivers. A month later...they finally reached his mother. She was devestated. She wanted very badly to have his remains returned home. It was going to cost approx. $17,000. to do that. Impossible. The only option we had at this point (2 months after death...& already buried)...was to exume his body...have him cremated (which was actually against her beliefs)...& return his remains home that way. What a heart wrenching decision for her...but she agreed. It was the only way. I wrote her a letter....letting her know her son wasn't alone in this far away country during his final days...& a priest was with him...read him his final rights....with hopes it would ease her mind & bring her some sense of peace. I never heard anything back from her...but she (& her son) remain in my thoughts. Sorry to have been so long. It definately was an experience I never thought I would encounter (& hope never to have to again). A very good quesion though...what about the ones who have no one to claim them?

Thank you ladies for the info. And Suthrndreamgirl although you never heard from that mother again, I am sure she's so thankful for everything you meant for her son.

The ones who have no one to claim him are buried on prison grounds. If any of you are with a man but are only a girlfriend and he has no family or, if the family wants nothing to do with him. FIND A WAY TO MAKE ARRANGEMENTS. They won't let you make any decisions are do anything with the body. Thank God Yawnco passed away after prison because, I never found a way to make arrangements except by prepaying which I couldn't afford. Even after prison, make sure you get everything lined up ahead of time. I was just lucky that we were finally able to locate and contact some of his family members. They were willing to sign off of making any decisions and instruct the funeral home to allow me to make those decisions. And, Power of Attorney WON'T do it. That expires upon death.

That has always been a concern to me. He has put me as "his person"...emergency contact....but GOD FORBID, if anything should result in death...I legally have no rights. Although I don't think it would be a problem...his family won't want the responsibility. They don't contribute while he's alive. If power of attny. is no good...then what?

Good Morning Suthrndreamgirl.

I think if you have a Power of Attorney you are pretty save. Just be careful, people are very strange creatures and although his family does not care now while he's alive, they might feel different when he's not there anymore. I have seen many times that while someone was alive, no one bothered to visit or call him, but at his funeral they sit in the front row and cry their eyes out.

Good luck to you.

Suthrn, there is paperwork that can be filled out. A living will, of sorts. You get it at the Probate Court office. But, it costs big. If you have his Power of Attorney, you can do the prepaid funeral thing.

That's true, the Power of Attorney will allow you to make arrangements for him in advance, but it's also true that the Power of Attorney expires on the death of the individual. It's at that point that the Executor of the estate (as defined by a will or trust) has decision making power. One thing to note, though, when it comes to cremation, no matter what the pre-arrangements are, if a single member of the immediate family officially objects and there isn't a will/trust/executor, the cremation will not be done until the issue is officially/legally resolved. (It's really hard to undo a cremation). It is SO much better to get either a will or trust in place now and an executor named -- it will save you countless number of headaches going forward.

That's true, the Power of Attorney will allow you to make arrangements for him in advance, but it's also true that the Power of Attorney expires on the death of the individual. It's at that point that the Executor of the estate (as defined by a will or trust) has decision making power. One thing to note, though, when it comes to cremation, no matter what the pre-arrangements are, if a single member of the immediate family officially objects and there isn't a will/trust/executor, the cremation will not be done until the issue is officially/legally resolved. (It's really hard to undo a cremation). It is SO much better to get either a will or trust in place now and an executor named -- it will save you countless number of headaches going forward.

This is what I was trying to say and you did it so much better. :)

Also, if there is an immediate family member alive, whether they are getting along or not, they will attempt to contact those family members before they will do the cremation. They don't want a family member to come back later and say that they had wanted to be buried next to their father/brother/son/husband (mother/daughter/sister/wife) and sue them.

EDIT: Oops, which is what you said in the text highlighted in red.

suthrndreamgirl - u have my DEEPEST respect !!

had tears in my eyes reading that and i hope if my son is ever in that position that he meets someone JUST LIKE YOU !!

Peace n luv

Kate xxxxxxxxx

Check out wrongfuldeathinstitute.com and they will advise you on what you should or should NOT do in the event your loved one dies while in prison. Also help for those who are in need of medical attention.

Suthrn, there is paperwork that can be filled out. A living will, of sorts. You get it at the Probate Court office. But, it costs big. If you have his Power of Attorney, you can do the prepaid funeral thing.

you can find those at office depot

I would like to collect the names, ages, reasons, also where this happend, if there was any previous illness, if they were treated, if so what for and by whom for these people passing away over the last 25 years.

I know this is going to be a huge project I want to publish these numbers if at all possible.

If you have any information please pass it along by e-mail to me:

authentic_shell@yahoo.com please mention Loved One-passed in the reference frame.

May the sacrafice of the ones who have gone before serve to protect the rest who will follow. AMEN!

I feel so sick reading this thread cause I have tried so hard not to think of things like this in reference to mike although I know there is always that very real possibilty that it could one day be him with all the violence that is going on in the prison around him and nothing is promised and I am terrified that he may one day be taken away from me before he ever has a chance to come home and because we are not yet married I know I will have no say whatsoever in what happens to his body or anything like that and his family isnt there for him now I can only imagine they may never even claim his body and then he will be in a prison cemetery and I would never get over that.