I think I posted this in the wrong spot before, so here it is again:

Hello, I introduced myself a couple of months ago but have never posted in this area. My husband is serving a 10 month sentence at Terminal Island. We strongly feel he did nothing wrong and has been very unjustly imprisoned, but that is neither here nor there, we are going through it now. On top not deserving being in prison he was put in a low instead of a camp, even though he was designated for a camp, because of space issues. I am having such a hard time. Sometimes I'm just paralized to do anything. We have two young children 5 and 3 and they are doing really well. They went with me to see their daddy last weekend on Friday and Sunday and it went really well. We completely pulled it off that dad was at work on his break. I feel so bad complaining about 10 months, but I swear time is standing still for me and sometimes I don't know how I am going to make it. I am so sad and so lonely all of the time, even when I am around people. I have a great support system, everyone we know has been supportive and in agreement that hubby was wronged in every way. But, I'm still lonely. I only get to go once a month to visit as he is in California and I am in Nevada. I feel so horrible after a visit that I can barely function. It makes me not want to go back. I enjoy seeing him during the visit but just do horribly afterward. I miss my partner so much. I feel like I am missing half of myself at all times. He is such a good, honest, hardworking wonderful husband and father in every way.
On top of this I have suffered a string of bad luck like I have never experienced including my children's school closing down for lack of money, my church closing for lack of money, my cat ran away and my dog came down with diabetes. (all in the 7 weeks since he has been gone) Still, I know I have a lot to be greatful for. We still have our house and our children are healthy and happy, but I am really wallowing here. Just thought I'd reach out to you guys for some encouragement. Thanks - Kerryann

Tiptoez, it does get better. I felt the same way for the first few months and to top it off, I was pregnant and on bedrest so I had alot of free time to think about him not being there.

The only thing that kept me from losing my mind was letting all of the issues go and asking God to take over.

When I did that my entire outlook changed, and so did my attitude.

It is really hard in the beginning, but just know that it will get a little easier. Concentrate on making you better and being there for the kids as much as you can.

If you need to talk hit me up on PM.

Hang in there girl,

gapeachwifey

I'd like to offer encouragement as well. I have a pen pal who's doing 10 months, and his family only comes to visit once a month, and says it actually makes the time go a little faster.

I do something silly: I find that a week pretty much flies by, and I know how many weeks we have left, so I put that many pennies in a little cup, and every Friday I take a penny out of the cup. I make sure to spend it during the week, too.

Tiptoez, just stay busy and you'll be 25% of the way there, then before you know it you'll be halfway done, then you'll be on the downside.

But feel free to come here and rant and rave. Oh, and don't worry about the Low vs. the Camp. I hear that some people prefer a Low over a camp because there's more to do to keep busy and much more privacy.

Hang in there!!

Tiptoez, Dont say only 10 months because 10 minutes can be too long if it is your loved one that is away. Each of us here has to find our own ways of coping with lonliness and despair. The trick is to put that energy to good use. I use to allow myself 10 minutes a day to feel sorry for myself and the time I was doing, after that I tried to maintain a cheerful attitude stay busy and find someone who I could lend a helping hand to while inside. You know what, one day I realized I was so busy that I missed my 10 minutes. Maybe that will work for you maybe it wont. Just write a lot, enjoy the monthly visitation and start getting a routine down so that you do not have lots of empty time to deal with. Visit PTO and read the post, answer the ones you can welcome newcomers, share your experience with others. Time will pass.

Just wanted to say thank you for the encouragement. It helps so much. -