Well I thought I better start a new chat thread for April, but seen as though we are already nearly through April, thought this thread could be for April and May.

So what has been happening with everyone?? Anything interesting been happening?? How are your loved ones and have you been able to visit lately?? Fill us all in!! :D

Hi there,
Well after my little hiccup and my mental hissy fit that followed, earlier in the week, things have calmed down. For now that is, until hubby gets the letter that I sent him. :( He is not going to like what I wrote in there, but he has to know how I am feeling. He still maintains he did not know anything about his ex sending him the money order, and he has come to the conclusion that she has only sent it to make me mad and argue with him.Silly me let that happen, but we have worked things out, and its all ok again. I am going back up there to see him on 24th May, our 9 month anniversary. :)
Hope things are good for everyone else, and those who had visits on the weekend, had fun.

ROZ

Hey Roz, I don't think it was really a hissy fit!! :) How do you think hubby will take the letter when he receives it?? I am glad that you did send the letter. That way, he is finding out how you are feeling about these things and hopefully can make sure things like that do not happen again.
So pleased to hear that you are going back up for another visit. Although I hope that there will be no really expensive taxi ride this time. Keep us updated!! :)

Roz already 9months, gee it has gone fast!

Well, he got the letter today.He said that it made him really sad, because he thought I had more trust in him.I did warn him it was a bit nasty,(ok, a lot nasty) but he told me he wanted to read how I was feeling at the time, even though "he did nothing wrong".I did receive a letter from him, that had been written right up to the morning before I called the jail, and all the while he was saying how he was sweating on my money order to arrive so that he could put money on the phone to call me because he had no money.By the sounds of the letter he really didn't have any idea that she had sent him money, so I guess I do look like I may have jumped to conclusions. He sent me a letter the day I went berserk at him, and even though he was upset with me, he still wrote how much he loves me and gave me almost half a page of hugs and kisses.He also wrote in there "I just want us to get back to loving each other" and that made me sad :( maybe I was wrong, but at least he knows what to expect if he ever does have contact with her.I asked him if he was going to write and thank her for the money and he said NO F*****G WAY!!.At least that made me laugh. Soooooo for now, things are fine again. :)
Next visit I am staying up there for 3 days, so i dont need to meet time frames for flights before or after visits. I am taking my mum up there to see hubby, and also for company for me. :)..That will be fun, she hasnt been to see hubby in a max. sec before, only at the med and min down here. She is in for quite a shock, poor old thing.Its her 76th birthday the day we visit. Maybe they might even bake her a cake...LOL
Em, soon I will be celebrating my first anniversary, like you did in Feb. I will have to get some pointers from you on what to do to make it special :)

ROZ

Roz, that is great that things are pretty much back to normal. Alteast he now knows how you feel about that type of situation. And if you are happier then that is the main thing!! :)

Please say Happy Birthday to your Mum for me, when it is birthday. But don't tell her how norty I am!! LOL

Haaaaaaa, good on ya Norty Nessy :) Of course i wouldnt tell anyone!!! thats our secret..LOL
Catch you tomorrow night hopefully :)...make sure you wear your norty hat again...hee hee

ROZ

Oh you can guarantee that the norty hat will be on, the moment that I step into chat!! LOL It just seems to appear on my head!! LOL
I should be in chat, don't see any reason why I won't be. :)

Hi all, well i'm still coming to terms with the whole he wont be home for 20 months, he will have spent twice as long inside than we did together before he went in. Its really geting to me i think i put too much hope into him getting back his parole and now im shattered.
Just started a new job thats keeping me busy and means that i have to cut back on my sat/sun visits every weekend to just sat cause its just too much. But yet i feel guilty cause i know how much he loves seeing me on the weekend. I just cant seem to win.
Hope everyone else out there is going ok, Hugs Katy

Katy, I am disappointed to hear that he got 20 months.

However, I am pleased to hear that you have gotten a new job!! Congrats!!

Thanks, the new job is great but am working 9 hour days plus hour travelling each way, so its a looooong day,
He's been in 5 months so far please tell me it gets easier as time goes on...
hugs katy

Hi Katy, the first six months is the worst. After that you start to realise you are coping and it starts to get easier. Just remember you can always come here to vent when you feel things getting on top of you.

Katy my man got 27 months, and we have just under 4 months left!

Woo hoo! I look back and I think "I can't believe that its been nearly two years" but then I look ahead and go *sigh* "Still another 4 to go".

But wissy's right, it does get easier to cope with being alone. I don't think you ever "get over it" but you learn to live with it.

SBH there is light at the end of the tunnel. So glad your ticker is nearing the end. Won't be long before we start a countdown for you.

Thanks, the new job is great but am working 9 hour days plus hour travelling each way, so its a looooong day,
He's been in 5 months so far please tell me it gets easier as time goes on...
hugs katy
Yes Katy it will definitely get easier, especially now that you know what's happening - 5 months of not knowing would've been hell!

We're 4 months down with 18 months to go till parole, and it is already heaps easier. I hate to think what I'd be like if I didn't get my phone calls from him nearly every day tho! And I'm still really oversensitive to things, even when I think I'm doing really well.

I think that it's really important to make sure that you look after YOU and your own life well, rather than spending all your energy on trying to help him & keep him happy (I'm talking to myself here as well, I think! <LOL>). So don't feel guilty about not travelling up both days of the weekend to see him - I'm sure he wouldn't want you to burn yourself out.

Congrats on the new job!

Well JD finally got his C2 classo, after a scarey little hickup in which they had on his file that he was a runner risk! Which if you knew JD is totally ridiculous, it was just from a misunderstanding in his first classo interview - he was really nervous at the time & made a comment that the guy took the wrong way, then wouldn't let JD explain himself. So he wrote a letter with the help of a few people & sent it in to the classo mob, & after talking for an hour between themselves they passed him for C2 & added an explanatory note to the 'runner risk' comment on his file. Whew!

Now we're just waiting on his transfer application to Glen Innes... I really hope they pass it & he gets up there soon - I'm hanging out to see him, & there's no way I can afford to go down to the big smoke again for a while. Fingers crossed!

Oh I bet you are so pleased. I hope you don't have to wait too long for him to get his transfer.

Fingers crossed for you JD!! :)

Hey KatyKat,
Just like everyone else you get use to it and it does get easier.

We have done 4yrs and have another 4yrs left.
I found the start the hardest waiting to be sentence and then the when he was moved prisons.
It is all routine and routine and we get use to it. Not much changes!


Hey JD way to go on the lower classo - toes and fingers crossed for you

YAYYAYAYY i am sooooo happy for you JD's girl that's great news, have my fingers and toes and crossed for you and hope all goes smoothly and quickly with the transfer.
Thanks to everyone for the support, i do appreciate it....
Hugs Katy

Dingo, thats brill news, hun. All our fingers and toes crossed must have worked. We have to keep them crossed until he is moved to Glen Innes, which will be really soon! Great news, and you will see him soon! :)

ROZ

Hey girls, thanks for all the finger & toe crossings - he'll be up here in no time for sure now! :grouphug:

JD that great news on the C2 classo. He only has to be C2 for 6 months, then he can go to C3 (day leave, weekend leave!!!!)! WOO HOO!

Fingers crossed he will get the transfer as soon as possible!

Ladies, I'm really sorry about disappearing from our chat last night. I have not been well in the last couple of days so when my computer froze and started playing games with me, I got frustrated and put myself straight to bed.

I didn't mean to be rude.

No need to apologise SBH. Hope you're feeling better and your computer is now behaving.

Its all good SBH!!! :)

I just need to scream AAAAGGGHHHH, one of those days!!!!!!

Sometimes I feel so alone!

I just need to scream AAAAGGGHHHH, one of those days!!!!!!

Sometimes I feel so alone!

Hey Darl, you're not alone, we're here with you - and scream away, it's ok!

Wanna offload? :grouphug:

Hey Em, you must not be screaming very loudly!!! I can't hear you!!! :)

We are here for you hon!!!

Love Ya!!!

Hey Em, dont sneak off. I'm having one of those days too,hun :(:(
I hate every weekend now, I soooooo miss my weekend visits, and today I am feeling just like you :( really alone. Lets scream together, then everyone will hear us!!

ROZ

Just remember a problem shared is a problem halved so if you need to vent you both know where to come.

Thanks all,

Well you asked to hear it- LOL

I am just over Hubby going to counselling as every 2 weeks ( couselling day) hubby starts with the pushing me away and it really hurts.
Hubby will say not to visit or I deserve better than this or him and then he will say I am sorry I dont mean it you are my world.
Hubby really needs the intense counselling not this look good for Parole visit!

A Family member which I trusted has been charged with sexual misconduct towards a juvenille. Oh this one is horrid to me- the family member pleaded guitly as was stated to me by the family member to get it over with, this person claims to be innocent. I am so shocked and hurt oh and the rest!!! Why would you plead guilty to these charges if your innocent???

My Pop has become very ill and well they say not long left but for some reason his Doctor has been saying that for a while. He was sent home on Friday.

Well I cant complain too much as Hubby was allowed to send money home to me from his account he saved a few hundred in 4yrs and sent it home. Some person has put the money in his spend account and not sent it to me! Inmates heard Hubby being told by the canteen Lady he has $@#% in his account and now the inmates think Hubby is rich - well for that prison he is! Hubby swears he wont spend it but gee I know he wants to buy things.

My list goes on and on and AAAGGGHHHH, I really look forward to the day when I dont have to be the strong one all the time.

Can you hear me yet Nessy AAAGGghhh! I think I am losing my voice.

Oh Em,

If only they would give him the right counselling that he needs. It would make life so much easier for everyone around.

I too, don't understand why you would plead guilty to something of that nature if you are innocent!! I know that I would not allow one of my family members to plead guilty if it was them and I knew for a fact that they were innocent!!

So will hubby spend the money do you think or will he get it to you??

I can just hear you hon!!! You might want to stop if you are going to lose your voice!!

Oh Em, if it's not one thing it's another. I feel for you. I wish there was something constructive I could say but anything I offer seems so inadequate. Just know that I am thinking of you and hope things improve.

Well things for me have finally turned abit for the better.

In the last two weeks I have had scans and blood tests galore, to find out I'm allergic to a number of things including household dust. I also have a sinus problem that may or may not be able to be fixed without surgery.

When the medication I was given hadn't done anything in four days, I went back to find out that I had come down with bronchitis on top of everything else.

Bubba had weekend leave, so I pumped myself with multi vitamins, anti biotics, panadol, vicks and tissues, and took on the 8 hour drive to pick him up and take him away for the two days. IT WAS WORTH EVERY MINUTE!!!!!!!

We have 15 weeks of this nightmare left and the time could not come a moment too soon.

I could never in my life imagine I could go through something like this. After two years, I still have days where I just sit on the lounge and cry. Where it doesn't matter who I speak to or what I watch on tv, I just sob. I can't wait til my Bubba comes home and I can spend my days laughing. Given the last two weeks, I'm surprised I haven't single handedly broken the drought!

I don't know what I'd do without you guys.

You poor bggr! Hey a few people I know with allergies & stuff respond really well to homeopathics, herbs (possibly Thuya) & kinesiology, if you're open to trying different avenues... For sinus (I used to have a lot pf problems with sinusitis), you can get a herbal cream of "Pokeroot" (don't laugh - that really is the plant!) which is absolutely brilliant for clearing blocked noses, sinuses, glands etc - if I put it on fairly thickly it works in about 15-20 mins.

Anyway enough herb lore from the witch in the woods, I'm glad you still got to have a good weekend with him - how often do you get them?

Only 15 weeks to go, hey - I imagine you'd be feeling "so near, and yet so far" after 2 years!

Warm thoughts & big hugs to you :grouphug:

SBH you poor thing. Having had bronchitis several times as well as sinus problems I know just how you would have felt facing an eight hour drive. I'm so glad the trip was worth it.

It's also wonderful to know that your nightmare will soon be over.

SBH day release that would have been so good and hard for seeing him go back. glad it all turned out for you.

Thanks guys.

JD, we have weekend leave every fortnight. Not long and you will be able to start to organise yours!

SBH, hope that you are feeling better soon. I suffer hayfever and I don't know how I would go, suffering allergies. Take good care of yourself. :)

Just wondering if we are having a new thread for June, or if we just use this one?