Hi all, Sorry haven't been on lately, been very tired and busy getting all the stuff for the baby. The day is near... due on the 14th Feb, yeah, Valentine's Day. So i guess its anytime now. Its so hard without hubby around. When i fell pregnant I thought it my head that hubby would be there for me, those nights where the baby was gonna cry,he would be the one picking her up and singing till she falls asleep. Boy was i wrong!!! Now its just me. I dunno if im really ready for it. Labour, OMG it just freaks me out. Can any of you girls give me some advice or things that would make me feel better. Im getting really nervous now on to of the depression. Im really scared that i will have PND as well. I try really hard not to think bout those things... For the baby's sake. Anyhow... thanks for listening, cant sleep. I find it really difficult to get a good nights rest....

IMMH, I would love to help, but unfortunately I would only be srouting second hand knowledge. I have never had a child myself, as the little one I look after is actually my step son.

But for what its worth, I have been told by those a little more experience that you can read every book and talk to every woman whoh as ever given birth, but nothing will prepare you for the love you will feel for that beautiful child!

All the best.

Well I have 2 kids both teenagers now, I was terrified of labour but believe me does not matter what you do its still going to come, I tried everything to postpone the day. Nothing does really prepare you for your first born. Yep it hurts but once you have your sweet beautiful baby in your arms you forget it all.
Speak to your doc and midwives about your concerns about PND.
It is good you can recognise your fears, to deal with your fears you must face them. I see that is what you are doing.

At 8 or 9 months pregnant you dont sleep - swollen belly, legs & feet. Baby on your bladder, cannot sit or lie due to the big belly. No wonder you cant sleep.
Best of luck and post away your concerns. Hugs and Smiles

Em, you are so right about once you have the baby, you forget all the pain. IMMH, you will be in pain when you are in labour. That is a given, but think of the end result. A gorgeous baby!!! And as Em said, post away your concerns, thats what support is about!!!

IMMH, as is mentioned in another thread, the fear is the worst part of it. I actually know of women who have had either totally or relatively pain-free births (lucky *****'s!), so hey, you never know! I've had 2 kids (now in their 20's), the first I was just pushed around by the doctors & other staff at the hospital, and it was a nightmare. The second, I took control, told them what I did & didn't want - albeit with some good support - and had an amazing birth even though she was breech.

I found the pain much easier to cope with when I relaxed and focused on my breathing - a lot easier said than done at the time, to be sure. And yes, as soon as that baby is born, you know it was worth every bit of it!

Will you have a friend or family with you for the birth?
Are you in an area where they have single mother community support, where someone comes around & helps out once or twice a week?

Hey girls, thankx for the replies. Well, That's what some of my firends that have given birth told me to. Its painful, but all worth it. hehehe..... And yes, there will be family by my side, in fact, too many. lol... my mother in-law, my mother, my sister, and my husband's brothers soon-to-be wife. So yes. Not quiet sure if im gonna allow all of them there tho. Especially my brother in-law's girlfriend. She wants to be there to witness how painful it's gonna be. Gee's not the kinda comfort and support Im after... Also means no swearing and shouting for me either. But hey, all in all... Im still scared but Im just trying to take one step at a time. Also, where you girls prepared for it. For me, the fact still hasn't really hit me. Abit hard to understand tho, (being how FAT i am NOW) but it hasnt really hit me that im going have a baby soon. I known that its due soon, but there still times when i don't feel that im gonna ACTUALLY have a baby. I know thats probably hard to understand, cos i dont really understand it either. ANYHOW...gonna end it here, if not im gonna go on forever, and plus my back aches...

I-miss-my-Hubby, Honey relax. You are experinceing all that i did also. Can't believe its a baby in that stomach!
You no what I did when I was having my first child 51 years ago? I was in labor and back then they never give us much for pain. So god came to me and said or it came to my mind laying there in labor-
Imagine All the people in the world, I could see china, japan, england, US. WALKING around. I said to my self-HOW DID THEY GET HERE? WELL SOME WOMEN HAD THEM ALL!! If they can do it I CAN ALSO. sO DEAR JUST REMEMBER THE BABY HAS TO BE BORN! YOU CAN DO IT!!
God Bless you and the Baby. Name her Love?

I have 4 children and right before I had all of them I was freaked out (at different levels) about how it was all going to go, the birth? what will bub be like? how will everyone adjust to each other? am I ready for this????
I could go on but I wont :)

IMMH one step at a time is the best approach to have.
Self doubt can make everything feel and become pretty messy and nasty hon, believe that you can do it and do it well.

You and your bub have been hanging out together for almost 40 wks now you know each other better than you think and when you finally meet exhausted, exhilarted and in awe of each other you'll feel connected like you never experienced before (thats about the point for me where labour pain seems to magically disappear) and yes its all worth it.

Like others have already said labor can and for most is painful but not in the same way I had ever experienced pain before, sounds dumb but its productive pain.
So don't let it psyc you out... you can do this.
Your body and your bub work together to try and make everything happen a smoothly as possible (even if at times it doesn't seem like it) for most people labour is a marathon not a sprint, your body is going to work harder than it probably ever has before so make sure your support people and you remember you need to keep your body and your mind fuelled with things like

snacks, drinks, etc (sometimes you don't feel like you can eat so crushed ice and glucoade tablets are good)
comfort things a pillow, fav comfy shirt, music, smells
massage, massage, massage
stuff to do... walk, laugh, play, bath, shower.Make sure they all tell how well your doing, because of course you will be doing a brillant job :D

Its great you have so much family support and they want to be there for you. But make sure you can feel comfortable around all of them and that there focus is on supporting you and your bub.

Best wishes for it all, may you have a wonderful birth and remember to breathe. :)