I haven't heard from my extended family member for weeks and I knew this was not good. I called his PO and he informed me he was back in for "strong arm robbery". I went huh? And he says Ca doesn't put up with this, etc etc. He sounded very irritated. I said, excuse me, but I do not know what that term is. He says robbed a convenience store, and then that specifically he picked up a cigar and walked out. They told him to put it back, according to him, and he said "make me" or some such thing. They called the police and it was on camera. He was kicked out of the half way house within days, then he lost his job for no shows when he went out playing out of state. a 74 cent cigar. He must be just trying to punish himself. It's really disappointing.

He just hasn't hit bottom yet, Holley. Until a person gets so sick and tired of living the way they're living that they can't stand it anymore, they're not going to do what it takes to change the pattern of their lives. They may pay lip service to changing, but when it comes right down to it, they just go back to the old ways. I've learned that there are people who will endure things I can't even imagine going through, so that I think surely this has got to be the bottom for them, only to see them get back up and run at it again. It's like that saying "If you think what you've always thought, you're going to get what you always got". His thinking hasn't changed enough yet. And a "strong arm" crime just means that the person got physical about it during the commission of the crime. I don't know the laws there in CA, but it's possible that if there was even the threat of physical violence, that would be considered "strong arm".

Holley,

I agree with Toi on this one. He has to want a better life before it will happen. I know it is disapointing to you, but it will take a change of mind set on his part before he can change his life.

Hugs,

Patti

I am very sorry to hear this. Hang in there.

He picked up a cigar? sheesh and yall think Tx sucks, good grief

Lulu, it doesn't matter WHAT it was, taking anything without paying for it is considered theft/robbery.

Maybe this was his way of showing that he couldn't cope out here in the world... only he knows.

Hang in there Holley, I wish you both the best....hopefully you can figure it all out and he will be able to start over!

mrs. d

Also sending best wishes to you both and hoping for the best!

I know, but it still gets me.

I agree with all the others. His frame of mind hasn't changed enough yet. I wish you the best of luck and pray that you find a way to stay strong.
Jackie

I'm strong, I'm just sad about it. His mom is a severe alcoholic and drug user and I spoke with her in Chicago two weeks ago. Nothing had changed with her. I feel for this young man because he has been out there alone for some time and I know how he grew up. He'd write me letters about how sad he was, how much he missed his siblings. And his brother has written him ONCE since Jan! ( my 18 yr old) I tell him, please write him, please give him support, he needs it, and if the situation were reversed you'd sure want to hear from him! But he's a busy kid, and he doesn't do it. I honestly do not think his PO was "just out to get him". Pleeeeze, here he is getting out of prison has a job and he doesn't show up for two days because he goes out of state to RENO! He called me from there!

he's a very strong young man. Probably if I had said "make me" it would not have been a threat!