MsAloha1018
09-01-2003, 04:03 PM
:fb:
Even though I have family members who have done lots of time in the Hawaii State Prison System, it never really hit home until my own Beloved One ended up being incarcerated. I grew up being a goody goody, trying to stay out of trouble because my cousins were all so kolohe that I figured I didn't need to add to the family's upset. And I never understood why my cousins' mates used to "stand by their men". I was so sanctimonious, considering how straight arrow Joe America my ex-husband was. I used to stick my nose up at my cousins, thinking that it could NEVER happen to me because I would NEVER end up being involved with a felon.
But then again, I thought that my marriage to my ex-husband would last forever-NOT (but that's another story). Then I met my Hunny Bunny and was with him for over 3 years before he became incarcerated. He's been in for over 4 years of an Open 10 year sentance. He's now on the road towards getting paroled. He's able to get out to the community a little bit at a time and is trying to get his act together.
I'm sure that it isn't a picnic when one is in the prison system, but I'm also sure that it's no barrel of laughs for those who are waiting on the outside. But what I found that was important for my Honey and I is that we always kept our communication open, no matter what. There was a period where I was unable to see him for 2 years because he was off island. He couldn't even call me because my phone couldn't receive collect calls. But we were able to write to each other often, and share lots of good stuff through the mail.
Today, even though he isn't as locked up as he could be he's still under the prison system. However, we're doing much better and we continue to love, support and communicate with each other. Especially for those who are waiting for long termers, the going can be tough and there can and will be obstacles in the way, but with keeping communications going and maintaining and open mind and a sense of humor (definitely needed on those days when visits are cancelled!) you can make it.:argh
Even though I have family members who have done lots of time in the Hawaii State Prison System, it never really hit home until my own Beloved One ended up being incarcerated. I grew up being a goody goody, trying to stay out of trouble because my cousins were all so kolohe that I figured I didn't need to add to the family's upset. And I never understood why my cousins' mates used to "stand by their men". I was so sanctimonious, considering how straight arrow Joe America my ex-husband was. I used to stick my nose up at my cousins, thinking that it could NEVER happen to me because I would NEVER end up being involved with a felon.
But then again, I thought that my marriage to my ex-husband would last forever-NOT (but that's another story). Then I met my Hunny Bunny and was with him for over 3 years before he became incarcerated. He's been in for over 4 years of an Open 10 year sentance. He's now on the road towards getting paroled. He's able to get out to the community a little bit at a time and is trying to get his act together.
I'm sure that it isn't a picnic when one is in the prison system, but I'm also sure that it's no barrel of laughs for those who are waiting on the outside. But what I found that was important for my Honey and I is that we always kept our communication open, no matter what. There was a period where I was unable to see him for 2 years because he was off island. He couldn't even call me because my phone couldn't receive collect calls. But we were able to write to each other often, and share lots of good stuff through the mail.
Today, even though he isn't as locked up as he could be he's still under the prison system. However, we're doing much better and we continue to love, support and communicate with each other. Especially for those who are waiting for long termers, the going can be tough and there can and will be obstacles in the way, but with keeping communications going and maintaining and open mind and a sense of humor (definitely needed on those days when visits are cancelled!) you can make it.:argh