Ok heres a question about visitation forms....I am unsure of what DOC policy states(if there is one) regarding your relationship to the inmate if you arent married, but are b/f or g/f. Do you write boyfriend, girlfriend, friend or what? And does it matter if you start out as friends then become involved, do you have to change it from friend to girlfriend or boyfriend or whatever? I know this may sound stupid, but I really need to know an "official" answer on this, that corresponds with DOC policy.

for the DOC you are either the "spouse" or "friend" or "sister", etc...they do not have a classification for "girlfriend" or "boyfriend"...i wish they did!!! so even though me and my man have been together (off and on) for 5yrs, i'm still considered a "friend" to the TXDOC, dangit!

Oklahoma works the same way as TX. If your not married you are just a female friend.

Ok thanks!

Ditto for Ohio.

Thanks everyone:) Actually one of the main reasons I wrote this is because in good ol Oklahoma DOC they are always trying to find something it seems to refuse visits over, so I wanted to be totally sure I wasnt supposed to change the status of our relationship on paper for them.

I wrote on my visiting forms "Fiancee" and it is reconized by the facility that my man is in. John told them at the facility that I was his fiancee and when I call I am able to get what ever info that I need for his family because of this. I am considered like a spouse. But of course this is from the facility where he is at now, it may not be the same way at another place.

Ok heres a question about visitation forms....I am unsure of what DOC policy states(if there is one) regarding your relationship to the inmate if you arent married, but are b/f or g/f. Do you write boyfriend, girlfriend, friend or what? And does it matter if you start out as friends then become involved, do you have to change it from friend to girlfriend or boyfriend or whatever? I know this may sound stupid, but I really need to know an "official" answer on this, that corresponds with DOC policy.

Im glad they are nice enough to do that for you, unfortunately at the palce my guy is, they dont do anything they dont absolutely have to, and nothing out of the goodness of their hearts:(

Yeah we got really lucky.. He has a great case manager and counsilor. So far that is.. I know that things can change at the drop of a hat with DOC. When he was in LCF he had a good one but he was not as nice as this one.

Thats great, its always nice to deal with people who dont act like jerks just because they have a little bit of authority over someone elses life.

I had a similar problem and am waiting to find out how it goes over with the minimum at Granite. My husband and I divorced after 10 years in 2002. We got back together after that and lived as husband and wife for a year before he went to prison. My last name is back to my maiden name, but he put me down as his wife on paperwork. I sent in my form as "ex-wife". So, I had to explain the relationship to the warden and was approved as his "wife". Now I'm going through the same thing with Granite, having to explain the relationship and all. I wanted to just put down "friend" and leave it at that, but I didn't know if anything would be in his paperwork from LCF listing me as his wife. I hate it because every facility is different in how they handle things. How are we supposed to know what to do?

Something that is helpful is every facility has a visitation officer that is there to answer any and all questions or they are supposed to. At some facilities my ex was at we were told on more than one occasion that the new paperwork was just a technicality and if you are approved at one the chances of another refusing you was next to nothing.