Hey Brandy girl, here on the very week of his homecoming for you... (isn't that SO exciting??!! I'm excited for you!!)... I just wanted to remind you in case you ever forget that there are a whole WHOLE lot of PTO folks who care about you, tho especially all of us who have discussed "the drug thing" amongst ourselves all these months.

I gotta admit I am terrible about getting behind sometimes - like that time I was sick a couple of months ago and meant to get back to and respond to a post of yours and never made it back to it. I always read your posts and usually have some thoughts about 'em, even if sometimes I miss responding... believe me, we do hear you, girl. You and I have talked in PM as well as talking in the same threads, I know, but I know I'm not the only one around who has been following your story from the beginning and has been right there with you nodding my head. So don't EVER think no one's listening... all of us here with addict and alcoholic loved ones or addicts and alcoholics ourselves, we're right here listening and understanding 'cos we've all been there.

So no matter what happens in the future don't ever forget we're here, and we hear you... even if we forget sometimes to say so. (Or get knocked offline and behind w/ insane natural disasters and power outages...) :)

And at this so-close-to-homecoming time when I know what concerns and worries you have, I share them with you 'cos they're the same concerns and worries that will be trying to nag at me when Brian comes home. So here's what I'm gonna suggest that you and I do about those concerns and worries -

Forget about 'em - the worries and concerns that is. There's nothing in the world that's gonna give us an 100% guarantee that the guys are gonna stay clean, wish there was but there's not. We're gonna hope for the best, because it's good to have hope... but don't place so much huge importance on that hope that we're gonna be devastated and destroyed if our fears come to light. In Al-Anon, we learn to "put it (your worries) in the God box", or to "let go and let God" (take care of it). Insert whatever higher power you wish there and just let it go. The fear, the worry, the concern, all that stuff, if you let it eat at you then you're liable to wind up sicker than your loved one, and you'll be little good to either of you.

Just take it all one day at a time (the most important thing of all - tattoo it on your forehead if you have to to remember!) - :D - and don't get ahead of yourself with the worrying and the fears. Just let life happen, enjoy his homecoming and make the most of it and be happy that he's home and don't worry about future events that may, or may not ever, happen. And no matter what happens, take care of YOU, and your son. If our men come home and we have lots and lots of and all good days, then I (and everyone else here) will be sharing in your joy. And if things get tough, you know we are here and you know we all know how it is. It's not an easy road to take, loving someone in prison, and if that loved one is an addict it can be so much more difficult. No human being on the planet knows what happens when they come home and I know that's what you and I WANT to know and there's no one that can answer that... I wish somebody could as much as you do - but whatever happens, I and everyone else on PTO with an addict and alcoholic loved one will be right here with you and for you, girl.

Have a wonderful week and be happy, 'cos it's something to be sooooo happy about, his coming home. I am so happy for you I am on pins and needles as if my guy was coming home himself, and I know so many others are too. You keep hanging in there and hang on to the strength you have gained these last many months - I have watched that strength grow and grow in you over these months and have hope that it will get you thru whatever's to come - and I hope this homecoming will be a wonderful, wonderful thing, I have lots of hope for you and your man that it will be. And if you ever start feeling worried or concerned or afraid, you know how to find me, and you know how to find your way back to this forum... we'll be right here if you need us. :)

I was going to send you this by PM but I know many who have been participating in PTO's fairly new Drug & Alcohol Treatment & Rehabilitation forum lately will likely be wanting to share this homecoming joy as well as stand by you against the fears too, so I'm posting this in the forum. Don't be a stranger after Friday, and let us know how things are going... we at PTO like to hear happy stories too, you know. ;)

Best of luck and wishes to you and Jerry this special week... hope it will be a wonderful one, Brandy. You deserve a lot of happiness and I hope the coming days will be full of lots and lots of it. ****{hug}}}

Lys

(((((Lys))))) :) You are a true treasure my friend!!

Thank you so very much for standing by me and thinking all this through with me. It means so much to me to know that you care. You know me so well, and just knew I needed these words right now didn't you? Well you are right!!

I love my huband with all of my heart and can only think and talk with him one day at a time, If I try to think even down through the coming weeks, I just freak out or get sick and I don't want either of those feelings.

Again Thanks so much to you my friend!!

I Luv Ya Girl !!!!!!!!!!! :D

You got it, girl! Let's just take all those fears and worries and let them make us stronger instead of letting them make us tired and sad and depressed - that's the way to go! :)

Lots of love and hugs and keep that "one day at a time" up and you'll be OK - you know where we are if you need us! :)

Lys

Congratulations Brandy, I hope that you and Jerry have a very special reunion and much luck to both of you!