I was wondering do any of you or have any of your struggled with starting to use drugs/alcohol since your loved one went in?

I Would Have To Say No. I Have Way To Much Importand Things To Do And Take Care Of To Add More To It.

I think sometimes its easier to try and dull the pain with alcohol and drugs then living with the loneliness. I have been making sure to not intake too much alcohol and surround myself with my friends and family to help the loneliness. This seems to be working great. I hope if you do feel like you have a problem you would seek help....you don't want to destroy your life for any man. Good luck!

My husband is very angry with me right now over this. I am so confused/angry/sad, etc. I thought he would be more understanding but he is furious.:(

I avoided alcohol like the plague when all this first happened, because I was already soooo depressed, that I was scared what I would do if I had large quantities of another depressant inside me...
But I do completely understand. I have prescriptions from my doctor that help with the pain.

To be honest, i was taking a WHOLE bunch of xanex after Lee left. It was a major problem, drinking with them too. The days i wasn't taken them i was more depressed than ever.

To be honest, i was taking a WHOLE bunch of xanex after Lee left. It was a major problem, drinking with them too. The days i wasn't taken them i was more depressed than ever.

That's me ~ how's you stop? Did your man get mad at you?

I was wondering do any of you or have any of you struggled with starting to use drugs/alcohol since your loved one went in?

I haven't had this problem in many years, but I have found myself tempted many times to dive headfirst back into this behavior due to the stress of this life. But even tho it may dull the pain for a short while, I know it will still be there when I sober up, so I'd rather deal with it in other ways that don't have the possible consequence of addiction, at least not an addiction to a chemical.

I hope that you find some other avenue to help you overcome this problem, and don't be too hard on your man, sounds like he is worried about you and that he loves you. You must remember he is in a place where he doesn't want you to end up as so many others have done due to the negative influence of drugs and alcohol.

I haven't had this problem in many years, but I have found myself tempted many times to dive headfirst back into this behavior due to the stress of this life. But even tho it may dull the pain for a short while, I know it will still be there when I sober up, so I'd rather deal with it in other ways that don't have the possible consequence of addiction, at least not an addiction to a chemical.

I hope that you find some other avenue to help you overcome this problem, and don't be too hard on your man, sounds like he is worried about you and that he loves you. You must remember he is in a place where he doesn't want you to end up as so many others have done due to the negative influence of drugs and alcohol.


Thank you ~ I know that is what it is ~ he is frustrated becasue he knows my pain is because I don't have him. He does not want to see me destroy what we have and by the time he comes home ~ have nothing.

I try to occupy my time, but the pain is still there.

I don't do drugs and rarely drink. My man got himself put in prison and as much as I miss him, I need to be strong out here for myself and for him. Last thing he needs is to be worrying about me.

I have never done drugs and I am a social drinker. I had my doctor prescibe me an antidepressant to help me cope with my depression after my b/f was locked up. Thank goodenss I did that or I'm not sure how I would have made it otherwise.

Yes I Was Clean And Sober For 10 Months... But When He Was In The Hole For His First Time Ever He Would Write Me He Thought I Wasnt Being Here For Him He Wasnt Getting Any Mail Nothing For A Month And A Half So Yes Thats What Id Did!!!! But Not For Long Trying To Get Back On Track!!!ive Got 2and 1/2 Weeks Clean Now... Its Very Hard!!! I Was Writting Him Every Day 2 Or3 Xs A Day And He Wasnt Getting Nothing So I Did What I Do Run And Cover Up The Hurt!!!!!!

Not I, though I struggled a long while ago for many years. I was clean when I met my husband and if anything his addiction has kept me that way. Sometimes the lonliness of being separated from your loved one and all that goes with having a loved one in prison is more than some can take and they turn to booze or various forms of drugs or prescription meds. Its not unusual at all. There have been times that I wished I could just for a moment release myself from it all and hide behind a substance but I wont do it. But for some they have fallen in that trap. If you are struggling, please feel comfortable letting us know or talking about it here or even privately in a pm. We are here and we all have shoulders that are yours if you need it.
If you are struggling, please feel free to talk about it. There are many of us that will be there for you if you need it. Also if you need help feel free to pm me and I will try to find resources in your area. God Bless, my prayers are with you. HUGS !!!

No drugs cuz thats what she is in for but I do drink a little more than I should but I work damn near 7 days a week! I drink when I am out with family or out at the clubs and at home to relax trust me the stress and hurt dont go away but the booze momentarily helps me forget.

No, I haven't and it has crossed my mind.

Having our loved one away from us creates all sorts of emotions and stress. Sometimes the loneliness creeps in and it is hard to deal with. I think everyone who has experienced having a loved one in the system has felt this from time to time. As others above have wisely said, resorting to "numbing" the pain can sometimes lead us into more problems :( when it turns into a habit. Yet, we have to handle our feelings somehow!!! I can relate to all of us ( myself included) who have felt this way, trust me. Anyone who needs to talk about this please post or feel free to pm me as well...HUGS to all!!!!!!!!! We are here for each other, lets support each other!!! ;)

When he first went in I found myself drinking more than I should have been, but I have that under control now and I only have a couple of drinks if I go out (not often). I have only slipped with the drugs once since last August when he went away.

I just can't see me doing any drugs, the drinking yes cuz I do it often enough when I am with family, or when I go out!

Thank you ladies for your support and responses ~ it helps to know we all ( or some of us ) go through the same things. Feelings and emotions take over when love is involved ~ it's a scary thing sometimes.

I found my self using food...I always loved food but my snacking increased Ive put on about 15to 20 lbs in 3yrs.

I don't have the money nor the desire to get involved in that stuff. Drugs and alcohol is what got him in this situation in the first place. I have to be strong for him and for me and drowning in your sorrows is not going to benefit anyone.

wow food, I didnt even think about that. Food is prolly the 3rd bad thing I have seen people use to drown out sorrows and pain.

Well I am doing better so far ~ I have had some long talks with my husband. He was so angry at me at first, but I think maybe he realizes now I don't need his anger ~ I need his support. So I am doing my best to not do anything, not even really drink socially. I myself always thought I would never ever drink or take pills as a result of a depression, and while I feel I am very lucky as I did not get in too deep ~ and I am realizing my errors and trying to change now ~ I see how/why some people fall into these things so deep they can't get out.

My husband is very angry with me right now over this. I am so confused/angry/sad, etc. I thought he would be more understanding but he is furious.:(
. . . Feelings and emotions take over when love is involved ~ it's a scary thing sometimes.
The second quote is why he's not more understanding and is very angry with you. He's probably thinking of all the people who get addicted to ANYTHING, no one expected to become an addict -- NO ONE.

sb sometimes you just never know, and it's that "never knowing" thing that's got your man shook. He is a real loved one to you otherwise he wouldn't care as much as he does.

Knowing that my husband loves me the way he does inspires me to not do anything that I know he would not appreciate. And, instead, inspires me to keep a smile in my heart that's wide and broad enough to take on anything.

If you replace whatever feelings you have that are compelling you to reach out to a substance with the feelings that you know he has for you, that may help. That's what living on love is about. No, living on love don't pay the bills -- your income does that. But it does give you a fulfilling feeling to where anything short of communication from him, YOU DO NOT NEED.

Yes unfortunatly
I go out and drink like once every week since he has been in. I think about 7 months now. I just dont stop drinking when I start. It is very sad because I should be spending my spare time with my kids and not lieing in bed with a hangover. It doesnt help that there is like no one that I can talk to about my boyfriend because everyone hates him and would probably disown me if they new I was sticking by his side.

sb - the one thing I was sure of was that I can be as much an addict as any other human. and when he went in it was for alcohol addiction. best thing I could think was that I wasn't following him down that road - I already knew from his example where it could lead.

no...i don't use drugs for me...so i know i'm not using them for anyone else lol.

I think we all use different things for coping.