Hi, we just had a family death. I am looking for some advice as to what to do about my son (the one in ccc). Its his Aunt that died suddenly Saturday.
Should I wait till he calls me and tell him over the phone.(where he would have no support after we hang up) or
Should I call the chaplin and have him tell him.
I would wait until we can see him but that wont be for 2 weeks and I know he will call me before that and I will tell him.
I just want him to maybe have someone there that will be able to talk to him if he needs someone to talk to. I know that if he calls me and I tell him to talk to the chaplin he won't. Not because he would'nt want to but he would just keep it inside.
Carol

Aw, Sweetie, I am so sorry.... I would call the facility and speak to the Chaplain, he'll have much greater perspective, I think, than we can really have about which approach will be the least difficult for your son to deal with.
It is possible that you can arrange with the Chaplain to have your son call home so you can break the news with the Chaplain standing by to offer whatever comfort or support he can.
Any way you handle it, it will be difficult but I think that the longer you wait, the worse it will be.... Good luck, Darlin'.

Jerrysmom
I agree with LeBeau. I work with basic trainees and that is how we do it. We inform the chaplain and he comes to our office and him and the trainee are one on one when they place the call. I have had many trainees whom loose their mother or father and we also assign someone to monitor their behavior 24/7 after being notified because everyone reacts differently. So if you get the prison involved he will have more resources

thanks, for your help i think that is what i will do, after thinking about it, and pretty much convincing myself that would be the best thing.
thanks again
carol

I am sorry for your loss, Jerry's mom.

JerrysMom, I would definetly call the chaplain. My sons Grandma, his Dads mom, died in January and my sons best friends dad died the next day and it was a Wed and Thurs. I was waiting to tell him when he called on Sunday but he read about it in the obituaries first. That was awful!! He said he was okay just shocked. He was at CCC and we are in Redding and they get our newspaper there and so thats how he found out they died. I kicked myself for not calling the chaplain.

Jerrysmom,

I am sorry for you and your families loss. It is hard when we lose our loved ones but it is always good to have support there. I agree with LeBeau to call the Chaplain so that there is someone with your son. You and your family are in my prayers.

Thank You everyone.
My mom told him before I could so I called the chaplin to tell him but he never called me back.
My mom said he sounded a little sad:(
I am going to go see him this weekend so I will get to talk to him then.
Anyone know what the weathers been like up there?
Thanks again
Carol