Hi, my cousin is in SAI Cassidy Lake Boot Camp. He has 77 more days left, that is if he sticks with the program. We are really close, sure he is now 19 and I"m 15, but i am having a really hard time with this. 3 summers ago he came and staid with us for three weeks, we really grew close while he was up. Ryan and I have made more memories over those three weeks and after that than I have with my own brother. I was just wondering if anybody had any information or helpful adice for myself or for him. If so please reply to this thread or email me at *e-mail removed per policy. Please PM member* Thank you all for taking the time to read this and reply.

Welcome to the Extended Family forum and to PTO. I have a nephew doing 18 to life and it tears me up. Feel free to PM me if there is anything I can do for you.

HI and welcome! I also have a close cousin incarcerated. My advice to you would be to write him, jokes, uplifting things. You can print a lot of stuff off the internet.
You don't have to send letters all the time. But make sure he gets mail a few times a week, if you can.
If he's allowed visits, and you can make a visit -maybe with your aunt- go visit him.
Then, if y'all live close to each other, be there for him when he gets out.
lis

know that I have not got a letter from Ryan, but his grandma and mom have both got a letter. He says he is doing good and everything is fine but he is having a hard time making his bed properly. He has 50 days left! I cannot wait until he gets out. His friend said he would bring him up to see me as soon as he could, so Im pumped about that! Thanks for all of the advice! I greatly apperciate it! Thanks again, and please, feel free to leave more! Teia

Hey everyone! Thank you all so much for everything! I got a letter from Ryan about 2 weeks ago! He said he is doing fine and cant wait to get out. He plans on moving where we live not long after he gets out. When he gets out he wants to start all over and go to college. He has taken his GED tests for Social Studies, Reading and Science. I have not got a letter from him since he took his reading and science tests, but he got a 500 on his Social Studies test, which he says it pretty good. It really sounds like he finally changed....I cant wait to here from him again! I really miss him, he has 39 days left, so he should have called somebody...I havent talked to his mom or grandma in a couple of days so im not sure! Well thanks again!

Hello everybody! i am so sorry i havent been updating a lot, but really i dont know much. Ryan called his house the other day and said that he was doing fine and cant wait to get out. Apparently he told his sister that he plans on calling me and really wants me to go and visit him when school gets out. He gets out of boot camp in 21 days and i cannot wait! These are going to be very long days and i can already feel the excitment building up inside! I cant wait ito see ryan, and well since he will be on tether for 120 days after he gets out i dont have to worry about not being able to hang out with him or seeing him when i go down there. I am hoping to go to his graduation on the 30th and then i get out of school about a week or two after that so i want to go stay with him for a little while. thanks you all so much for all of the advice! it is greatly apperciated!
Teia T.

It sounds as if everything is starting to look up for him. I'm glad it's going good and he will be home soon.

Hey everybody! How are you all doing? Good I hope! I am so excited for Ryan to get out! He only has 8 days left! Our Great-Grandma was put in the hospitial last week, she was having some heart problems, it was really scary. They ended up putting a Pace Maker in, and while they were in the process of doing that she had a code blue, she died but they brought her back after a minute and a half doing compressions. I am so glad that she made it! Its good to know that when Ryan comes home she is going to be there to greet him with her warm cheerful smile, and her absolutly amazing food! I bet that he will be thrilled about that! School is okay, getting better. We get out June 9th, and I cannot wait! I was planning on going to see Ryan either the day school got out, or the day after, but it doesnt look like that is going to happen because of all of the open houses i have been invited to. I am really going to miss senior friends, one in paticular, but Ryan will be out and home, and I will be able to talk to him about it, and hopefully he can help me through it! I really do miss Ryan! I can not wait to get home from school next Tuesday so that I can call him and hear his voice! I sent him his last letter last Wensday. I have only got one letter from Ry since he has been in boot camp. I should probably be glad that I got that, but im actually a little disappointed, It might be selfish, but I wish that he would have wrote me more so I would have known how he was doing. Well I just thought that I would stop by and leave something, and hopefully next time, Ryan will be out! Thanks so much for all of your help!
Teia T.

HE'S HOME!!! I am so glad he is home! Rys been home for almost a week and i have talked to him like everyday! thanks so much! all of you!

That's great news!!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!! I knew you would both make it thru!

I was so happy to hear from my cousin yesterday. He will be released in August. He seems to have a great, positive attitude and is committed to being sober at the moment. I hope it will last.

His sister visited him and he was encouraged that his family all has been asking about him.

He told me I was his "beacon, a real source of direction whether you know it or not." I don't know if I can live up to that responsibility but I sure hope I can help him transition, even though I am 1000 miles away.

Any suggestions on how I can help him, even though I am far away? Such as a care package--what should I send?

Hey everybody! I hope you are all doing well! Im doing pretty good. its summer vacation and hopefully I will be going to see ryan soon! Things with Ry have been kinda shaky...since he got out we have only talked on the phone a total of 4 times, none of which were very long conversations. We have talked online a few times though. He has done some not so good things since he was released. He started smoking again. Once when we were talking online, we got into a pretty big arugment. We were fighting about something total different and then he was like "Well im sorry im a [screw] up in life." It totally shocked me! I mean, never once have I told him that he was a screw up or he messed up his life or anything, and he just throws it out there. I told him I have NEVER lied to him and i wouldnt start, he is not a screw up. At least i dont think so, he made some mistakes along the way, but he is not a screw up. I just wish things could be the same, we could both be teenagers not having a care in the world, just being ourselves. I know, I still am a teen, but it seems like I have had to grow up A LOT, and im not so sure im ready for it. I mean, to a certain extent its good for me, but...i just dont know. I do know that no matter what happens, i will be one of the very few people who stands beside ryan no matter what, right or wrong. I love my cousin, but i dont think he knows how much. I dont think he understands that i mean what i say. Im glad he is out though! Please...PM me or even post on here...I want to know what you have to say, you have all helped me so much through this whole ordeal, please dont stop now, the ride isnt over.
~Teia~

Hey Everyone! I know it has been a while! Sorry! I have been so busy, but good news! I came home a week ago from spending two weeks with Ryan! It was just like it used to be, although now, we are closer than ever! The first 4 days down there were not to bad, but every single day after that me and Ryan would fight about something stupid, just like we used to. We can never stay mad at eachother long though, so within two hours we would make up! We fought like brother and sister, it was so funny though! We would stay up late almost every night and just talk about everything, we are soo open with eachother it is CRAZY! One day we were fighting and I went upstairs to get away from him, so I could cool down, and he came upstairs and just randomly told me something that meant the world to me. He said that my letters are the only thing that got him through, they gave him the strength and the confidence to stay strong and make it. Telling him how much he means to me and that I love him and will always be here for him is what helped him succeed. When he told me all that I just started crying, because I felt like I accomplished something important, and made a difference. Ryan did get another month added on his tether, becaus he ran outside after our 4 year old cousin who was running to the road, and the only ones home were Ryan and Great Grandma, and of course she couldnt go after him, so the cops came and Ryan explained what had happened to them and to his PO and luckly, she just added another month on. Ryan does have a job now, he works at McDonalds. Hes doing pretty good, he gets really stressed out being stuck in the house all day, but hopefully, with him working he will be a little better. Ryan has made it a point to call me, actually he has called almost every day since I have been back, its nice to know that he really cares and is grateful. Thanks so much for everything!
~Teia T.

I just want to thank all of you for all of the advice and words of encouragement that you gave to me. Thanks so much, I know that this is a random post, but it needed to be done!
~Teia

I just got back from seeing Ryan again. I miss him already is that a bad thing? We didnt get to see eachother very much this weekend. I dont know why, but I miss him soo much! I think it might be because I won't be able to see him until November, at the soonest, if he really is coming up like he says he wants to. How do I get rid of this feeling, I feel sort of like I'm missing something, incomplete. Please help me if you can, all of you have helped me so much, but I really need it again!
~Teia

I'm so lost at this time in life im only so young and he is only so young we are 3 years apart and he is by far my best friend he is my cousin and by law he is my uncle but he means so much more to me then that i just write and write and write and though he doesnt write me back as much as i write him i still keep writing because if i give up im loosing everything in life he has 16 years right now family is appealing it so hopefully it'll get lowered if not imma visit and write as much as possible

Ugh...I don't even know about Ryan anymore. I think he is going to end up back in prison, I never wanted to say that...but I just did. I love Ryan, you all know that, and so does he, but it's almost like he doesn't care anymore, or is afraid to know what it is like to be cared about. I need help, please, anything.
~Teia

Lostnconfused

What makes you think he will end up back in prison? Maybe he does not realize the love and caring that he has from you! Try talking to him again!

Im sorry I havent wrote in a while, Ive been really busy I have a job now, as a matter of fact, I have to be to work in an hour so I dont have much time. I just want everybody to know that Ryan is in fact in trouble again. He broke his parole rules and now he is in something that is for people who break their parole, but it isnt for prison. I dont know the details because i havent talked to anybody for a long time. I thought maybe he would have learned his lesson, but i thought wrong. Im doing okay, i guess since i sort of expected it, its easier. Well Im gonna go...have to get ready for work...

it seems as all is going well for everybody. i havent posted in a very long time, and im so sorry about that. im okay. i dont talk to ryan much anymore, i guess we just grew apart, but the other night i had a strange feeling that something was wrong, so i decided to call him, and come to find out he is back in jail for violation of parole. he is supposed to get out sometime in april, im okay i suppose. i guess it was sort of expected. well im trying to do 50 things at once, so im outtie, hopefully ill be on more often.
Teia

My 1st cousin--once removed-- Died Last week. I am trying to help find out if anyone has someone there . His name was Jimmy Ray Bolden. If anyone knew him contact me please em. Iposted in the Tennesse form but not much posting there.

im only 17 my cousin just turned 18 and he has 16 years nothing to complain about but its rough enough. I just wish everyone luck. Pm if you need anything

I Feel You My Cousin Who Was18 @ The Time Was Senteced To 13 Years, 3 Years Ago And Has A 3 Years Old Son