So I have been having a pretty bad day today, and while I was on the phone with my fiancé I told him that if he wasn't in prison, I would be calling him to come pick me up and staying at his place tonight. He was shocked that I said this and politely told me that if he wasn't in prison we would be living together. I hadn't really thought of this lately, and while we're engaged, which to me, is the closest thing you can get to being married, I hadn't thought about what our relationship would be like if he wasn't in prison.

For me to think that I would be living with him, under different circumstances, blows my mind. I've never been in a committed relationship like this, and to put it in terms with how it would be really amazes me with how far I've come, relationship wise and personally.

So, the point of this rambling is, if you were in this relationship with your current man, and he wasn't in prison, what stage would you guys be at? Would you be living together? Probably married? Casually dating?

Interesting question. The first bid I did with Sebastian was already underway when I met him. He had a parole plan in place and that meant paroling to his parents home. Once we became serious we talked about it and he talked to his mother and told her that while it was probably best for him to keep the plan in place his intention was to live with me. She was fine with that. A few months later we learned that Sebastian would be on electronic monitor and would have to live at his parents home. We were disappointed but it was just a minor thing.

Now that he is back in he is maxing out and can live where he chooses when he gets out, he will be moving in with me. It's already our place, he spent alot of time here prior to going back.

We knew we wanted to be married back before he got out the first time. I was married, my now ex-husband have lived in different states for many years and chose to wait until our youngest child turned 18 to finalize our divorce. I am now free to marry Sebastian.

We would not have gotten married in the prison, just a personal choice and for us probably lucky we feel that way as it is almost impossible to be married in Illinois prisons. I don't feel any pressure to get married in a hurry, I don't think him being in prison right now changed anything on that level. My biggest concern about a wedding is the timing in terms of not too close to everybody's birthday, or the holidays, weather conditions, LOL it may sound silly but I don't intend on doing this but the one next time and I want it to be right, yanno?

Okay this was my roundabout way of saying that regardless of incarceration our relationship would be right where we are at this moment. I am proud to be able to say that. I always try to keep it real and never treat him or our relationship differently just because WE are doin' time.

Patty

So, the point of this rambling is, if you were in this relationship with your current man, and he wasn't in prison, what stage would you guys be at? Would you be living together? Probably married? Casually dating?

We would had a big wedding instead of getting married inside, and probably would have had a baby by now. :o

Happily married, living in a much warmer place than Michigan with about 10 acres, living as self-sustaining as we could and working with area animal shelters fostering animals..especially larger ones. We would have horses of our own and a jackass as Mr's bestest friend ;)

We've talked about this alot, even before we got engaged. He would parole to me, and live with me. We would stay in my place in the city until my lease was up, then find a place outside of the city, with a little land. We're trying desperately to get married, so if and when he does ever get out, there's no doubt we will be living together.

well id say seeing one of my friends is trying to pursue something with me and i have known him for a very long time but im bascially trying to see where it goes before we take this big step im dreaming of it bascally us dating for a little while then living together and then marriage and children and believe me since me and my ex just broke up this friend i know if all goes well will be WAY better then him and also he looks way hotter too :) LOL

Married with a couple of kids in a warmer climate.

I think we'd be really close to making the decision to live together. I feel like we'd be together all the time anyway.

Married and me pregnant.

we'd be married and he'd be up right now with the baby ;)

We would be together raising our children

Like others have said we'd be living some place warmer then NY.

We would be married. We would have had a destination wedding on some exotic island instead of being married inside behind the wall.

We are planning our destination wedding (renewing our vows) and honeymoon though for when he comes home next year!

We would be wondering if the other was playing it straight and I'd be doing that "will he call me?" thing.

That is a tough question. We talk about it all the time. If we didnt meet while he was in prison, then we would have never worke dout, if he was still dealing drugs. I would have killed him. But if he was doing something legit and was never in prison, yeah i think we would be living together by now. H eis moving in with me when he comes home.

The reoccuring theme I see here, no matter what our response was, would be that we would be together.

HEIS: I know where you're coming from. Prison changed my fiancé and had we met on the street we would not have been together because he would have never changed. But in my little imaginary perfect world, where there are no prisons walls, there would have never been any bad behavior that would have warranted prison time in the first place. :rolleyes:

If we weren't married we'd definitely be engaged. Probably living together already, starting our lives with one another. Wow, it really is amazing to sit and think how things would be if he wasn't in right now. It's pretty crazy.

We would be married, had travelled the world and be ready to have a baby together!

Well, I think that we would be living together and posibly be married, I know for sure that he wants kids and I do too, so we would have a baby already or maybe one on the way! =) As for warmer temps. Well what can I say, I live in sunny San Diego! =)

Rebeca

We'd be living together.

If the bars were not between us, probably moving in together. It's what we've wanted for awhile now. :heart:

married with kids...hehe that what i want anyways and hope someday i get it

Married and me pregnant.

Me 2 but somewhere alot warmer and interesting than Indiana!!! He really wants to move to TN being hes got family there.

~Bella~

i believe that would have our dream wedding....the whole nine.....and getting plenty of baby making practice!!!!!!!!!! heehee