I will admit be the first to tell you that I was not looking for a relationship when I started writing my now fiancé in prison...I wrote him reaching out for a friend and hoping to touch someone's life. He wasn't looking for a relationship either. What did we end up finding? The love of our lives...

Anyway, what made you decide that you would get involved with your significant other? Was it something they said? A way you felt? I remember when I decided that I wanted to be with him, I had said something in a letter and he wrote me back asking what I wanted from him, being in our situation what could he do for me, could we allow these feelings to grow. My answer was simple even though it took me days to figure out, what did I want from him? I wanted a relationship, I wanted an environment while even though we have bad circumstances around our relationship, we can nurture what we have and take it from there. I told him that I wanted to be his girl and I knew that he didn't want a relationship but I couldn't help the way that I felt.



How did you decide that you wanted a relationship with your inmate?

Well when I met my fiance I was pregnant by a man that really hurt me and I was alone and I was visiting my brother and he told me that this dude in there said that he wanted to get to know me. At the time my fiance was married and had been without a visit in 4years and we talked on the phone and wrote eachother alot and then I decided to go and visit him which led me to visiting every weekend. I think the thing that made us fall in love was the fact that we were friends first and we got to really know eachother. We have been together for five years now and we have had both some bad times and good times but through the bad times we grew strong enough to recognize the good times. I think that he is the best thing that has happened to me.

Ms Ray, I'm with you on the friend's first thing. I remember he told me once: great relationships are built on great friendships. We had a great friendship from that first letter, we just click. It's amazing!

Thanks for sharing your story :)

I've mentioned before that I had recently gotten out of a bad relationship, was dating up a storm and SERIOUSLY not looking for a relationship. Ring ring, enter Sebastian and his wrong number ways...

It took a few months for me to come around. He was steadily giving me attention and was realistic enough to say that even if I did not think I would commit at this point we'd definitely be meeting when he was released, he felt that strongly about it.

In some ways it wasn't a concious decision on my part. I began accepting fewer offers for dinners, parties, the date scene typical stuff until I had one date end on a low note, no big deal just wasn't into him AT all and he really wanted a relationship when I realized the reason none of that meant anything to me was because this man that I wrote to and who wrote to me and called now and then (at that point) was a thief, for he had truly stolen my heart.

The rest as they say is history, he came home after 14 months, we spent 16 months together in the freeworld and now he's short timing to max out. Leap of faith and well worth it.

I love him,
Patty

I fell in love and stayed in love for many years.At some point I decided I was tired of compairing every man to him.Thats when I decided it was the right choice.

I was NOT looking for love when I met Nuro. I was newly divorced and a new single parent. I was just visiting my cousin inside when I saw Nuro. We felt something special between us the moment we met. We wrote to one another for about 3 months before we decided to get married.

I initially set out to offer friendship to someone I had practically known my whole life. It grew from there and I believe to this day we were meant to be together and this time apart allows us to grow closer without the interference of a sexual relationship, which I CAN'T wait for, but have to, but anyways ya friends first, and I just fell in love with someone almost the same as myself but with man parts! LOL We have so much in common and such similar tastes and interests! :yay: YAY FOR DESTINY :yay:

I had NO intention of being in a relationship. I was dating up a storm, loving being single after a bad relationship. I started writing out of curiousity really, but the more letters I got from him, the more I realized I really found someone special. I stopped dating, as I just wasnt interested anymore, and found myself thinking about him all the time. I knew I had feelings for him, and after awhile went by, I finally told him. He was hesitant at first, didnt want to see me hurt, but in the end we decided to be together. No looking back now!

I aslo had no intention to be in a relationship, when I first started to write, my now, fiancee.But I think that it was love at the first letter, not at the first sight.
After 4 years our love is growing stronger

The way his sexy voice made things "tingle."

LOLOLOLLLL!! ms D your not right! lol ;)

Soon after I began writing to my guy, I was fired from my job. He was the only one I knew that said what I needed to hear to make me feel better and right then I knew he was someone special. This is the first time that either of us has tried the friends first way of falling in love and it has proven to be a lot more bonding and rewarding than any other relationship that I've ever had.

It's amazing how everyone that has posted here has said that they weren't looking for a relationship. Thats what you call LOVE because it hits you when you least expect it. It's when you're not looking for something that you find it.

well because he wouldn't leave me alone. he bugged me soooo much that one day i woke up and realized that i wanted him to bug me more lol. and believe me, i DEFINITELY was NOT looking for a relationship. as a matter of fact, i hated allll men LOL.

just like you guys I wasn't looking for love. I was in a longterm relationship with the father of my daughters. I caught myself having butterflies in my stomach everytime I found a letter from Deshon in my mailbox and that was even before opening it! No matter how long the letters were, I always wanted it to never end. But I ignored those feelings, until the relationship was over. I went over all his letters again (took me 3 days!) and I realized that I had been in love with him for a long time, but chose to ignore these feelings. I finally made up my mind and told him that I wanna be his girl. because he seems to know me better than I know myself. because he tells me what I need to hear, even if I don't want to hear it. because he has the courage to tell me some of his darkest secrets. because he always seems to know how to cheer me up. because he makes me laugh. because he's my soulmate and my best friend. because he is truly special, because ... hmm, do I sound in love? lol

My baby is so open and loving. It was just a matter of both of us deciding we were gonna be there for one another. He makes me laugh, he makes me feel good, he's everything I want in a man and he's just so beautiful to me. I guess I just fell for him, and he for me...hard to explain but easy to know in your heart.

. . . Anyway, what made you decide that you would get involved with your significant other? Was it something they said? A way you felt? . . . How did you decide that you wanted a relationship with your inmate?
Hey whiskeyboo -- West Soy-ide!!:o He wanted to be my husband, point blank. He told me he know we're not in love but that he KNEW we would grow to fall in love with each other as time goes by. So I answered his crazy question with a crazy answer of "yes, I'd be honored to become your wife" and three months after meeting we tied the knot. Today, 9 years later going on 10, we are crazily in love with each other, just like he knew!! :p

Well after I quit, I wrote him and let him know I was gone and I was ok, so we started writing as friends first, it was about 6 months after we started writing and I hadnt heard from him in about 2-3 months and when I got home and saw a letter in the box from him, my heart skipped a beat, then took flight. I stood right there and read it, I knew right then that I wanted him in my life and as more then just a friend. Which I do and he is my husband now. :)

It was rather simple for me... I couldnt imagine how my life would be if he wasnt my partner. It was a scary thought to walk away from the unknown. I never wanted to live my life always wondering... so here i am going for it! :)

I had been through a very bad relationship and I had sworn men off. I was concentrating on my kids, my job, and buying myself a brand new home (my dream).

When Deon approached me I was very apprehensive. Little did I know he already knew he wanted me to be his wife. He says he fell in love with me just watching me do my day to day work. In his heart he knew he had to make me his....that I am!

I certainly was not looking to become romantically involved when I met my husband. I was just looking for someone to write to.

However, I had been divorced for 20 yrs and although dated alot, when I met him it just happened, what can I say.

He clicked, I clicked and we both came together. Through long communication, and much soul searching the time was right. We have alot in common as well as things that are not common.

He is the love of my life and I am so happy that I was given another chance at love. The love bug bit hard this time. The only happier I would be is if he was home with me. One day it will happen though, just have to be patient, they can't keep him forever.