Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?

Just curious about others experiance in this area

:wave: I guess I'll go first. :)

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?

My bf expressed it first both verbally & written. But he's the outgoing sort. I'm pretty shy & reserved. So it's a little harder for me.How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?

I would say probably writing for 6 months to a year. It wasn't until our first phone call that I knew for sure. Or maybe that's just when I finally admitted it to myself. A very nervous but comfortable call. It was something in his voice. That feeling has been reaffirmed each time we've talked since then.After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?

We were writing for about a year just as friends. I'd have to look back on my letters to know how many it was before it became more than that. :pWere you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?

I felt completely comfortable. Which is very unlike me. Writing it was easy, saying it was a little harder. I already knew how he felt. He told me he liked me many times & was worried I would find someone else.I think that sums it up pretty good. :cool: What about yourself?

Well I can't answer the questions because we have not told each other that we have deep feelings. He has written me on MANY occasions that he is interested in a romance with me and that he think we were meant to meet. He has said he hopes we can be together for many many years; even if that turned out to be a friends only relationship.
We have only been writing for a little over a month. I started writing him because I have always have crappy luck with men, mostly my fault making stupid choices. ANyway, right off the bat I told him that I only wanted a friend. I thought for sure I wouldn't fall for him or get emotionally involved because I've never seen him (he has a photo of me) and there isn't the sexual tension that you have with men on the outside. BOY WAS I WRONG. After a couple letters I just felt like I was falling for him.
My dad, my best friend passed away January 27th, 10 days after I got my first letter from Ronnie. He has been my rock and my strength this whole time. My dads illness and death left me not wanting to ever get close to anyone and so the last letter I got from Ronnie he said he was interested in me and seeing if a romance would happen. So scared, I told him I didn't know if I wanted that and I didn't think it was fair to him to be with someone like me. Typical scared reaction trying to push him away so I don't love anyone so much again only to lose them.
I haven't heard back from him but I am worried he will just take that at face value and walk away.
I don't think I should tell him that I feel like I'm falling in love with him becuase it is so soon into our correspondance. I have never felt this way about any man in my life. And I have had my share of relationships before. I don't understand it.
You know I used to think women who met men in prison and fell in love were crazy and now I'm one of them...

There's my story! Thanks for sharing yours
CIndy

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
He did

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
About a year to know he was the one I wanted to spend life with. But about 6 months until I fell in love.

After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
6 months or so

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
I was sure he felt the same way, but it took me longer to let my guard down.

Thank you for sharing!

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
He did, the bum, and then he took it back right away! But eventually it all came out, very, very slowly....

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
We met face to face, so we knew we got along and liked each other pretty quickly... but we are supposedly "just friends" so he ain't "the one" although I'm sure he'd like to think he is LOL

After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
It took a year of writing before we started using the "L" word. He used it first and he still uses it more than I do...

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
I know he loves me to pieces but I still get nervous expressing my feelings around him!! He knows I love him too but I don't like to get carried away cause he ain't my bf... also the man has an ego as big as a house so I don't wanna feed it any more than I have to... ;)

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
He did.
How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
About 3 months.
After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
I don't know the exact number as we wrote ALOT & OFTEN so back to 3 months worth.
Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
I was positive!

Did you or your partner express their feelings first? I did
How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one? After the 3rd month and i eased my butt down there to see him with out telling him.

After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person? several we write most times 7 days a week and never wait for the other to respond.
Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way? I was kind of nervous but if i was not so presistant i might not have him today.

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
He did!!

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
The first time we actually got to speak on the phone which was November 05 bit I felt like I thought that was that feeling Ive had many months b4.

After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
Mine was about a year of writing I wanted to be sure and he felt like he wanted to tell me he loved me but didn't know how to come out and tell me in fear I wouldn't believe him.

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
Once he told me I was releived cause I knew I wasn't the only one feeling that weird feeling!!

~Bella~

Thanks Bella~

Anytime ;]

~Bella~

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
We both expressed it at the same time... our letters were crossing the ocean at the same time. :)
How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
After about a year.
After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
One 'novel' of a letter each!
Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
I wasnt sure that he felt the same, so i was taking a gamble. I had realised that i was in-love with him for a while, but was too scared to tell him in case he didnt feel the same and that i would mess up the strong friendship that we had built. Thankfully he felt how i did! :D

Wonderful, thanks

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
He did on the phone, even though we had been telling each other how important we were to each other in letters
How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
I knew that he was the one before he did. We had been writing for about 2-3 months by then.
After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
We wrote about 2-3 letters a week since April but he didn't tell me he loved me until September.
Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
I knew he felt the same way. It was just a matter of waiting for him to say it to me first. Just one of my things. I wanted him to say it first.

HI everyone just thought i would share my story with you all.
i was introduced to my now partner by a friend who also has a boyfriend in the same prison and my partner wanted someone to write to, so i started writing to him and right from the word go i told him i wasnt looking for a relationship only a friendship, which he said he understood, we wrote often and i sent him pictures and stuff and right from the first letter we got on really well and found we had lots in common.
a few weeks after we started writing he started calling me and again we got on well on the phone too, from that first phone call i started having feelings for him but i was all confused coz i had no idea what this guy looked like or anything, anyway one day i had a letter and he had signed it off with the words i love you, so i decided i had to go see him so i booked a visit but didnt tell him till 2 days before and boy were we both nervous, i was going to a prison to meet a guy who i had absolutely no idea what he looked like, but it all turned out really well coz we fell in love immediately and now nearly 6 months on we are very much in love and we see each other twice a month and we are planning on being together when he gets out next year.
i too used to think that people who fell in love with prisoners were crazy but i can see how easily it happens because the only thing you have is communication and if you dont have that you dont have a relationship
Love to you all
LISA xxx

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?

We both knew that something special was happening and this was more than firendship; but I actually said "I love you" first and then he replied with the same.

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?

Something told me he was the one the day we met; but we had been writing for about 3 months before it was confirmed for me that he was it for me!

After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?

It was about 3 months.

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?

I knew that he felt the same way but was cared to be the first one to say it in case the feelings were not going to be returned, which is why I said it first.

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
I expressed my feelings to him first.How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
We were writing to eachother for over three years when I suddenly noticed that I was falling in love with him.After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
It was three years worth of letters back and forth. But the first time I told him, we were speaking on the phone.Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?I wasn't nervous at all because I just felt as if it was meant to be. I wasn't sure what his response would be, but I took a chance.

My situation is kind of different. I met my husband when I was working for the prison system as a CO. He always looked out for me and told me who to watch out for and so on. Me being me, I never thought anything about it. He would ignore me sometimes and other times he was real nice, and again I never thought anything about it. I always thought he was fine and too good for me (how funny does that sound) but anyway, one day his cellie asked me how I felt about him and I told him that I thought he was cool and if I ever ran into him when he got out I would take him out to lunch. A few days later my now husband asked me to read a letter he had gotten from one of his children's mothers. She was telling him how she had met someone else and she was getting married and she wouldnt be bringing their daughter to see him anymore. There was no date on the letter and come to find out it had been written months before he showed it to me. He just wanted to see how I would react. SO I told him he needed to let her know how he felt and if he loved her then he needed to let her know that he would be there for her if she ever needed him. He said it was at that point that he knew that I was the one because I was willing to set aside how I felt and to think about his feelings. A few days later he started to tell me something and stopped and said that he didnt want to disrespect me or put me in an akward position, this happened like 3 times. Finally I told him that I cared about him and I thought he was a wonderful person but I couldnt compromise my job. He said he understood. Then he got in a fight about a month later and got shipped to another unit. That is when we started writing each other. I wrote him first to let him know that I was there for him and then it just went from there. About 3 months after he got shipped I decided that I wanted to be with him and I couldnt have him and my job, so I quit my job. A year and a half later we were married. Now we have been together for 5 years (almost 6) and married for 4. I knew coming into the relationship what I was facing and I have no regrets. He actually told me first that he loved me and that is what he was trying to say all the times he approached me and then wouldnt finish. Our story is truly amazing and it just goes to show that God works in mysterious ways

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
He did! It took him a while, because I was in a longterm relationship and he was afraid that, if he confessed his true feelings, that I would stop writing. but of course i didn't. i just kept telling him that I couldn't be his, and he said that he was cool with that. i think he knew all along that i was ignoring what i felt for him

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
well, I don't know, because I kept ignoring it. but I know now and that's what's important! lol

After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
he told me after a couple of months, i told him after 4 years

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
well, i know for a fact that he feels the same, but i was nervous anyway. weird huh, feeling like a teenager all over again. i think it was more exitement than nervousity

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?

I did even though he says that he was in love with me before I wrote him telling him I was falling in love with him, but he was battling the emotion.

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?

A few months. I didn't know he was 'the one' until after I told him I was in love with him.

After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?

Two, I wrote him two in the same day, the first letter I wrote I only wrote, I think I'm falling in love with you. Then later that day, in a panic, I wrote him again telling him I wasn't falling in love, I was in love, I explained how I was feeling and said I'm sorry if I freaked him out by saying that. Actually, it's taken more than that, I'm still expressing my feelings to him every day...

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?

I was SO NERVOUS. I felt for certain he would think that I was crazy and that I would never hear from him again. He had said little things that made me think he had romantic feelings towards me, but I didn't think he was in love. He didn't tell me he loved me until awhile later when I wrote him saying that I hope some day he'll feel the way I feel for him about me. He wrote me backing telling me he did, and that he loved me, he just wanted to wait until we were on the phone for the first time to tell me. I guess I ruined that, but knowing he felt that way was amazing. I was nervous about it every day until then, and I would get upset when he would talk about the future and things because I wondered how he could be doing that if he wasn't even in love...

Hope I helped!

WhiskyLullaby:
You

WhiskyLullaby:
You helped so very much. Your story sounds soo familiar. I told him in a letter I sent earlier this week I was falling in love with him. I hadn't seen him until I got a picture yesterday in the mail. I am so scared he is not going to write me anymore. He too makes references about having feelings for me and naturally envisioning me in his future. But nothing to suggest he thinks he loves me. I'm so nervous waiting to hear from him... Was it hard to get more letters without him saying he felt the same way? I hope he doesn't think I'm some crazy psycho.

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?

Him, he told me the first time we had a conversation that I was gonna be his wife

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?

6 months

After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?

I cant remember it's been so long ago:)

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?

I was because I knew a relationship like this would be hard, but I knew he loved me and I loved him so together we could do it. I also knew we were gonna run into some issuse because I used to work there, even though we didnt get together till after I was gone but still I used to be one of them so I knew how they worked.

WhiskyLullaby:
You helped so very much. Your story sounds soo familiar. I told him in a letter I sent earlier this week I was falling in love with him. I hadn't seen him until I got a picture yesterday in the mail. I am so scared he is not going to write me anymore. He too makes references about having feelings for me and naturally envisioning me in his future. But nothing to suggest he thinks he loves me. I'm so nervous waiting to hear from him... Was it hard to get more letters without him saying he felt the same way? I hope he doesn't think I'm some crazy psycho.

I would check every letter after I sent that letter to see if he said I love you, and sometimes I would cry because he hadn't said it yet. You can't force love onto anyone, and I think him envisioning you in his future is a great sign.

Take it day by day...I remember when I got that letter in response to my letter (I knew which one it was) I was shaking, and I opened it, and he said that he got this crazy cheesy ass grin on his face that he hadn't been able to wipe off all day, he went on and on but never said I love you but I was comforted by his response.

When will you get his response?

I'm assuming I will get it on Tuesday. He generally sends on a week. He won't let me send him money because I have kids so I don't push his letter writing; he must be conserving stamps... :-)
I'm nervous he won't even mention it. Just talk like nothing was said. His letters make me feel like he has the same kind of feelings but I can't be sure. I'm new to this and maybe i am reading into it.

Thanks for all your words! THey are very comforting.

Hun feel free to PM me if you ever need to talk, I know exactly what you're going through

I may just do that. thanks

*Did you or your partner express their feelings first?

He did!

*How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?

We were together about 3 months before I realized that he was the man that was made for me.

*After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?

It took him two weeks to tell me he loved me......very fast.....but the funny thing is that I had fallen just as fast. Almost like love at first sight I guess.

*Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?

I wasn't nervous because he had already expressed his feelings to me.

BTW.....We have been married for almost a month now......and have been together a year.

Joyce~

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
We actually expressed it at the same time on the phone, we had been talking just about three weeks on the phone.
How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
I knew right away that Travis was the one that I was meant to be with, I dont know how to explain the feelings I just knew he was the one
After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
Since we both said it together on the phone it was the very next letter which was like letter number 6 or so that I confessed all my deep feelings of LOVE for Travis
Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
Of course I was nervous and thought he wasnt serious, but as soon as our third call after we told eachother we loved eachother I knew for sure he was serious, cuz he had me call his sis and the first words out of his mouth were, I AM A DAD to FOUR CHILDREN and IM IN LOVE

Did you or your partner express their feelings first? He started it
How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one? About 7 months, and I didnt realize anything, untill I saw him for the first time
After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person? He started to express feelings after about 6 months of writting , for me it was about 7 months and our first visit together.
Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way? I wasnt nervous, when I first saw him, he was like the missing puzzle piece from my life!

FRIENZTODAEND,
I feel that same way about Ronnie being the missing part of my life. I don't feel like a whole person without him.

WhiskyLullaby:
He too makes references about having feelings for me and naturally envisioning me in his future. But nothing to suggest he thinks he loves me. I'm so nervous waiting to hear from him... Was it hard to get more letters without him saying he felt the same way? I hope he doesn't think I'm some crazy psycho.

Thats the story of my life. I fell in love with him after 2 months of writing. Actually I fell in love with him the first time i heard his voice which was about one month. Then when I met him in person I knew he was the one for me. Here it is almost six months later after the first time that I kissed him and i love him more with each passing day. He is always talking about a future together....marriage....kids...vacations....and he has yet to tell me he loves me. He's admitted that he has feelings for me but what kind of feelings? I don't know, i think he just has a hard time expressing himself. Believe me it sucks when only one person is in love but I can't give up yet because hopefully he'll realize what he has and that he loves me and was just to scared to say it. To be honest though I will not wait forever to hear those words.

Thats the story of my life. I fell in love with him after 2 months of writing. Actually I fell in love with him the first time i heard his voice which was about one month. Then when I met him in person I knew he was the one for me. Here it is almost six months later after the first time that I kissed him and i love him more with each passing day. He is always talking about a future together....marriage....kids...vacations....and he has yet to tell me he loves me. He's admitted that he has feelings for me but what kind of feelings? I don't know, i think he just has a hard time expressing himself. Believe me it sucks when only one person is in love but I can't give up yet because hopefully he'll realize what he has and that he loves me and was just to scared to say it. To be honest though I will not wait forever to hear those words.

Hopefully he'll come around, and tell you that he loves you soon! My fiancé did the same thing, he would talk about having feelings for me and what not, but he wouldn't tell me that he loves me. I know for a fact though, that waiting to hear those words, when I did, meant the world to me. I too thought that I wouldn't wait forever to hear him say those words, which is why I had that breakdown that one night and wrote him about all that. Lately he told me about how he had an internal battle about the whole thing, he kept thinking to himself that there was no way he could possibly be in love, it was impossible, and then to be in love with someone who he's never met.

Anyway, what I'm getting at is sometimes it's hard for them to own up to their emotions, even when they are feeling them.

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?


He Did... We were just talking on the phone one day and he was like, Yo... I Gotta tell you this, I been wanting to say it... please dont get mad, but i've been feeling this way for a long time... and sooo on... It was soo CUTE!! ( wish he woulda told me sooner, but he didnt wanna ruin my PREV relationship... HE SHOULD've):blah:

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?


We were friends 2 yrs Prev of incarceration... and Writing ever since almost 6 yrs Now... I've always had a thiing for him But we both had Relationships Prior to his incarceration! :(
After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?


The minuet he told me it was a relief, I was like PHEW..... ME TOO BABY MEEEEE TOO!!

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?

I knew i felt the same way but yes i was nervous because I didnt nor do i ever want to ruin the special friendship we have, But i would never want to miss out on the oppurtunity of his love and Emotions either!! I love him!:)

I know and its the waiting thats killing me.

Did you or your partner express their feelings first?
Well he expressed his feelings to me first

How long were you writing each other before you knew he was the one?
We were writing about 4 months


After how many letters did it take to express those feelings to the other person?
After he told me I still wasn't sure, so I didn't express mines back until I was very sure about the way I felt for him

Were you nervous about doing that or were you sure they felt the same way?
I was very sure that he felt the same way for me