I wrote here a while back about the relationship between me and the father ( or should I say sperm donor ) to my unborn son . I pressed charges on him for dragging me out of a car . I felt that maybe I should'nt have because he was working and on probation . Well heres an update since December , keep in mind it's only Feb. . I took him back and he's left me when he got a check for a measley$ 2358.00 . I took him back he's busted me under my botoom lip and I had to get stitches the doctors called the police but , I still didn't want to press charges . Oh I forgot he quit his job after only 2 weeks and 3 days in December which is the same month he started . He busted me in the mouth and sent me to the hospital because I wouldn't let him drive my new car so I left him again . During our time apart I met and talked on the phone with a guy and ended it after 2 days of phone conversation . During that time he broke into my home stole my XBOX and went and got the guys number of my caller ID . He called the guy then called me and told me he would never speak to me again
because I cheated on him . Keep in mind people that He hadn't tried to call me and even see in the baby was okay nd , he knew he broke into my home . After about 10 days and the stitches still in my mouth I took him back . So when I went to take my ultrasound he cursed me out in front of everyone in the hospital and wallked out on me at the ultrasound . Afterwards I still talked to him and in that same day I found out from my cousin that he was talking about me with some girls around the neighborhood but, he swears up and down there just his smoking buddies . ( yeah right ) . So later on that day I was playing a game on my phone and ignoring him when he hit me in the face and stole my cell because , he figured I was texting some other guy . ( whatever ) I called the police and he gave my phone back . ( oh yeah don't forget that within this time frame I still had stitches in my mouth ) . Now today was his 2nd time staying out all night long so fed up with him I told him he had to leave . He didn't want to leave so I just decided not to shut up until he did . So I got mad and put his stuff out myself I though he was gone . He came from out of nowhere and tried to put the bag back in my house . I held on to the bag and wouldn't let him . I hit him and slapped him in the face because he almost pushed me down the steps and said that he didn't care and , Im 5 months pregnant ! So he hit me back in the face and iI said I was going to call the police just as a bluff he pulled me by my hair and stole my cellphon . He left in a car and I haven't heard from him since but , it's only been an hour so who knows . I know Im sick of him and the police are looking for him for drugs already so I don't need him in my house . He's a drug dealer and worst of all he's just a nickel and dimer . I thought he had change when he got his first job before katrina . but , I guess once scum always will be scum . His father is serving 10 years behind drugs and he'll be soon to follow but , since I good none ausive family I know my son won't be like them . So my message to the domestic violence victims out there male and female please realize that these abusers are sick and without help cannot be saved these laws are for a reason to protect the innocent . Please don't let these guys hit you and tell you your wrong if you call the police because they're on parole or probation . They weren't concerned about that when they hit you and they're really the ones putting themselves in jail .


Sorry for writting so long but , if you're in my sitaution please read and if you feel similarities please leave .

msjai,

did you leave this guy now? I think where you went wrong is you kept giving him chances. i think you need to press the issue that he stay in jail. Do you want your child to be around this environment once you deliver? If you care about yourself enough and have respect for yourself, you should leave him. im sorry he seems like such a sore loser, but you have to realize he keeps doing it because you are letting him.

good luck!

If you have not got him out to stay, please do. I can tell you, if it happens once it will keep happening. I lived a nightmare, for over 2 decades. An abuser is just that an abuser. It is not love that keeps them coming back it is needing the things that we allow them to take, from us, including our identities and sense of worth. If they make us noting, they feel better about themselves.

As for your son, I have two boys 14 and 16, who will stand up and call me every name, in the book and tell me just how worthless that I am, just like their Daddy, before them. If your child grows up watching you treated as if you are nothing he will see nothing, in you either.


You are in a very dangerous place. Women do die, from this. I am only blessed that the times that I was pushed out doors, even after I was left crippled up, slapped around and knocked down etc. did not ever lead to serious injuries, beyond a couple of facial scars and a lot of bruises.

You are worth far more than this guy wants you to feel that you are. Please see this and stop letting him hurt you. He definitely deserves the fate that he is setting himself up for and your baby does not deserve to have to grow up, in harms way, as I foolishly allowed mine to do.

We buried the boys Dad, in March of 2004. He got wasted and pulled out in front of a Bronco, in a compact car. The fact that they had watched him torture himself and all of us, for their entirety of their short lives, only made it harder, for them to accept. And I will never have the relationship with them that I should have had, because I let them have a relationship with a man that never earned the right.

If you ever need to talk just yell. I can tell you some stories and I can promise you it will not get better.

Get serous now, enough is enough. Don't put your kids through your living hell
you'll be kicking yourself in the butt later on when it is too late.

mrsjai it sounds like you have yourself together, and I'm glad to see that for the sake of yourself and your child--please never go back into it. My siblings and myself watched my mother be beat down all our life's. Needless to say it does something to a child. Maybe abuse isn't the only reason we children are the way we are but I think it plays a major factor in the way we turned out. My brother and sister both doing time for meth and me just coming out of rehab for alchol abuse. I think the hardest is that I can't say I'm sorry for the the disrespect I showed my mother now.

i pray that you and your children are away from this jerk.you will never be safe around him b/c he cant control his need to degrade you and he cant control himself to not hurt you either.you went through all this for a reason and that is to prosper and share your story with other women just as you already are.