how can i explained it to my children about there uncle being locked up they always ask questions about what did he do to get locked up in there eyes there uncle shouldn't be locked up cause he is a good person and i tell them he is still a good person:idea:

You can explain that he IS a good man, but he made a mistake and broke the law and had to go to prison. Educating our children to realize that not every person in prison is a BAD person will be the stepping stones to educate others!!

Man, it is hard to explain this to kids. I haven't found a great solution either. I just keep telling to them he's a good person and help them remember good stories about him and encourage contact with him. In another forum, someone suggested books aimed at kids whose parent is imprisioned. Maybe some of these books would give you ideas http://www.prisontalk.com/forums/showthread.php?t=37020&highlight=books

My kids' uncle has been locked up for 2 years now, and my oldest son just turned 4 last November. Sadly, they don't even know they have an Uncle Johnie. Anyway, how long does he have?

my grandkids know that their uncle is in prison they just dont know why(murder& armed robbery)we just told them he did something wrong and has to pay the price they are 7 and 6 but were 5 and 3 when he went in this satisfies them for now but eventually they will need to know the truth ..i just pray for the strength when that time comes ...keep it simple until they can understand better...Just my humble opionion....Cheryl

my kids uncle is doing life without till 25 my kids dont know the real reason he is in there. they think its cause he took something that wasnt his .when he went in they was only like 3 and 4 so at the time it was a good thing to say.we dont talk about why is really in there{for murder and armed robbery}. i dont think they are the age to know that right now. now they are 7 {almost 8}and 6 plus i now have a 1 year old who doesnt even know him.i dont know a good way to tell kids when i decide a way to tell my kids ill let you know how i did it.i guess it just depends on what hes in for.

I think how you explain the situation of an incarcerated family member to young children depends on if you believe in your loved one's guilt or innocnce. I believe my brother-in-law is not guilty, and so in explaining to my son, I said that when the police believe you did something wrong, they have to do what they feel is the best way to learn from the mistake. In our specific instance, I say that if everyone involved had told the truth, he would never have gone to jail.

I thought about hiding all of this from my son, as he adores his uncle, and Uncle is serving less than two years, so perhaps I could have sheltered my son from it. But, think about when you were a kid...didn't you always pick up on so much more than your parents thought you did? I wanted my son to respect my honesty, so I answer all of his questions in an age-appropriate way, and hope that when Uncle comes home, a renewed bond will once again form for the two of them.

My kids uncle has been in and out of jail and now doing a 90 prison opp. ( not even sure what that is) basically i told them he made a mistake and now he has to be on a long time out....(LOL) But its the truth.

"Time out" is a good metaphor...

My kids have a hard time understanding why there uncle can't be home with them. My 6 yr old has taken it the hardest. For her I have lots of pictures of her and her uncle. So that she can remember his smile and she talks to him when he calls. Also with my 6 yr old to ease her pain I gave her a teddy bear that I told her was her uncles and that if she hugs it that he will feel them. Also that he hears her prayers and knows that she loves him. We also write him letters regularly. These are just a few things that have worked for her.

Another really cute thing I did around Christmas was bought each one of my kids a christmas present and put his name on them. I then told the kids that Santa delivered them for their uncle.

My brother is serving 6 years and is very far from home. It took me alot to explain that he had gone to prison. I don't go into the details as to why my brother is there. Just that he had to go away and he would be home soon. I also keep letting all my kids know that their uncle loves them no matter what and thinks of them often.

Just follow your heart and you will do fine.