ok with no phone call to finish the conves. we started on fri 12/16 i really have been upset so i sent a dear john letter to my ex because basically i have been through with the lies and deception. I dont know who he is writing or calling besides me other than one person that he was doing drugs with when he was out and i asked him to stop any communication with that person but low and behold he called them twice so when i confronted it with him he said he called to tell them to leave me alone. but the letter thing he never explained i know he is considered indigient so he gets free envelopes and paper but havent gotten a letter to me or the kids in about 6 weeks. so thencefore i wrote the "dear John" letter to tell him i can no longer be with someone that continually lies and is deceptive. Anyways just needed to vent thanks for listening.

Renee

P.s. i sent it yesterday i wonder how long it will take for him to get it?

I am so sorry to hear about your sadness, but I will give you a bit of advice, I dealt with a Liar for 8 years and I thought at one point that I was losing my mind, but it was his contiuance lies that made me crazy. You did the right thing by writing him, allow him to absorb your feelings and let him go, if he wants to change he will, I have found that you can not change anyone, you can accept the way they are, or move on..I will keep you in my prayers..Good Luck and keep us informed..Shay

(((HUGS))) To you Renee! Do what is best for you and you kids. You deserve honesty and if he can't give you that then maybe you did the right thing. I am here for you and support you completly! Drena

Aww sweetie, I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. I agree with Drena, you have to do what you feel is right for you & the kids. Sometimes I wonder if the men inside truely understand the struggle we go through out here. Unlike them, we don't get 3 free meals, a free roof over our heads and no problems with bills. The least he could do is take the time to respond to you.

I'm here for you girly and you need to follow your gut feeling. If you sent it out yesterday with the holidays and all he'll probably get it at the end of next week or in 2 weeks. I bet you anything once he gets that letter you're going to get a response from him ASAP because he's going to realize that you've had it with his butt and you're not going to put up with it! Good luck and we're here for you girl!

Renee, honey I hope your handling everything ok, you know what irritates me is when i allow my honey to control so much of my emotion, and i know your ex is your ex, but it is very obvious that the two of you arestill very attached. i really believe as soon as he gets that letter he's going to say something. just always be true to you and your kids first, then him. But always YOU, it's not an easy thing to do and to me it sounds like your the kind of woman who is constantly taking care of everything else that you don't take time for you. and honey trust me sometimes we all need some me time. we're all here for you
Love, Sarra

Renee,

I agree with Lisa and Drena, and Sarra. Do what is best for you and your kids. You all come first. Like Sarra said do not forget to take some you time. We need that once in awhile but we get so caught up with what's going on in our lives we forget to do so. Every now and then I go shopping, gambling, grocery shopping by myself, Red Lobster, get my nails done every two weeks. Just a few ideas.
We are here for you and I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Stay strong! It might take awhile for him to get the letter since it is the holidays.

Renee, I agree with everything said here and I hope that you always remember YOU come first. What good are you to anyone else if you dont take care of you first? You are in my prayers and stand strong lady. Hopefully when he gets that letter and it sinks in that you are no longer going to just accept whatever he decides to give he will change his ways. The biggest lesson I learned in life happened while I was going through my first divorce is "people change because of force not choice, rarely does anyone see the things they do as wrong or feel the need to change". When he chooses to change then he will be a better man for you and himself as well as your children. Good luck and God bless.

Renee you know that he will only do to you what you allow him to.....if you put a stop to his crap he will have noone to turn to and therefore will realize what he has lost. By then you will have gone on and realized how much happier you are without the stress of someone you cannot trust. Be strong, it's hard but you can do it.

Renee, soooo did he get the letter? I mean has he responded to it or tried to call?

But he said he never got the letter so i tried to let him know what was in it but he acted like it was no big deal! But get this he said he got my name tatooed on his ring finger of his left hand . I seriously think this is not going to turn out so good :(

God Bless

Renee

P.s. i got the call today so we will see if he gets that letter soon!