WELL I FINALLY SAW ANTHONY AND TOLD HIM ABOUT WHAT IS GOING ON.. HE WAS UPSET BUT MORE HE FELT HELPLESS. I TOLD HIM WE ARE BOTH JUST GOING TO HAVE TO RIDE THIS OUT.

HE EXPRESSED HIS CONCERNED AND THEN I EXPRESSED MINE. IT WAS SO HARD AND JUST A VERY CONNECTING EXPERIENCE ALL TOGETHER. IT WAS SUCH A MAJOR BONDING MOMENT (VISIT) FOR BOTH OF US.

HE SAID HIS BIGGEST FEAR IS THAT IT MAY REALLY BE SERIOUS AND THAT IT COULD KILL ME.. I TOLD HIM I THINK THAT I AM GOING TO BE FINE. IT IS SO SMALL AND WE DO NOT EVEN KNOW THAT IT IS EXACTLY SO NOT TO PANIC JUST YET. WE ARE BOTH SCARED AND IT IS NIVE TO BE ABLE TO SHARE IT WITH HIM.. IT SEEMS LESS SCARY KNOWING THAT HE IS RIGHT BY MY SIDE DURING EVERYTHING. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH..

WHEN I GOT INTO MY CAR AFTER THE VISIT I COULD SMELL HIM ON MY HANDS.. HE WAS WEARING THIS LOTION WITH OBSESSION IN IT. I STILL SMELL LIKE HIM 6 HOURS LATER. :) IT REALLY BLESSED ME AND JUST LIFTED MY SPIRITS.. I DO TRULY HAVE THE BEST HUSBAND AND THE BEST FRIEND ANYONE COULD ASK FOR IN THERE LIFE.. I THANK GOD EVERYDAY FOR HOW HE BLESSED ME AND LET ME HAVE THE OPPERTUNITY TO SHARE IN ANTHONY'S LIFE. SUCH AN HONOR..

:):):)
You and Ant are lucky to have found one another and will have a long lifetime of seeing each other through both the good times and the bad....

Shortie, I'm happy you had a great visit and was able to share everything with anthony! It always makes me feel better when I share everything with Larry. I also feel blessed to have been blessed with my best friend and my soul-mate, it is true many people go their whole lives and never experience real True Unconditional Love! So, we're pretty lucky. LOL Penny

SHORTIE:

I AM SO VERY GLAD YOU TWO HAD SUCH A WONDERFUL VISIT.... THIS IS ONE YOU WILL NEVER FORGET AND IT WILL GIVE YOU STRENGTH FOREVER...

GOD BLESS AND KEEP YOU..


LOVE
DONNA

Glad to hear everything is working out. I know how you feel, I visited Steven yesterday and it was a very emotional visit. It seems like the smell of them lingers on with you hours after the visit and it's in some of the letters.

I am glad you shared all this with Anthony..lean on eachother...you two are a powerful couple and will overcome any and everything..feels good to know you have found your soulmate huh?

it has been such a hard 2 years. even though it has gotten tougher it seems so much easier becuase ant and i stick together and weather every storm.

I am so blessed to beable to share my life with him.. He is such an inspiration to me and always supports me no matter what.. I LOVE HIM>>

Shortie ~

I don't know about you, but for me to actually open up and depend on someone - well that's progress. I've been burned so many times by reaching out and trusting people, that I became really leary about "trust issues." When I met Wayne, it seemed really easy to reach out to him, to trust him, and to be vulnerable with him. He knows my faults and weaknesses and loves me anyway. So keep reaching out to Anthony - he's reaching back to you. You're in my thoughts and prayers.

THANKS DANIELLE

I TOO HAVE SOME REAL TRUST ISSUES.. IT IS SO EASY TO TALK TO ANTHONY IT IS ALMOST SCARY.. I CAN TELL HIM ANYTHING.. I AM NOT USED TO FEELING COMFORTABLE ENOUGH TO TELL SOMEONE EVERYTHING ABOUT ME..

BEING IN HIS LIFE HAS MADE MY LIFE SO MUCH BETTER IT IS REALLY UNDISCRIBABLE.. I AM SO GLAD THAT I CAN LEAN ON HIM FOR THE SUPPORT I NEED HE'S TRULY MY SOULMATE..

it is really a gift to have someone you can share everything with.a person from whom you know he won't judge you for the things you say or think you're crazy or whatever. a very precious gift.

I saw anthony on saturday. I went to tell him about the surgery i am having tomorrow it was so hard. You see i did not get a contact visit. so we were back to square one. TDCJ only allows 2 contact visits per month and I had already had two. Even though I has such important news to tell him I still had to do it the no contact way. I was more frustrated and just more upset when he came down.. I was crying and he said to be strong I just looked at him and said I am being strong but now I need you to be strong for me.. I need to just be weak for a minute and hey started to cry. NO contact made this visit so hard and I was really upset. By the middle of it I was laughing and smiling again so it was good over all ad I am just glad that i got to SEE him before my surgery.. I take nothing for granted anymore..

Shortie... I am sorry you weren't able to get a big hug from Ant before you have to have surgery... :( I know just how frustrating that is... to have what you want right in front of your nose and not be able to reach out and grab it... I am glad to got to see him though and that he was able to make you forget your worries if only for a bit and put a much deserved smile on your face!! You will be in my thoughts and prayers tomorrow... I hope the surgery goes well and it will relieve the pain you've been going through....

Like Shawna said, it must have been so frustrating to be so close to Anthony and still so far away, that you couldn't touch each other.

I'll be praying for the both of you, hope the surgery goes well

thanks for the prayers i am just glad that this stage is over and we can look to see what is next and that my doctors are perpared and taking care of me.. i am truly blessed and i thank god for that..