View Full Version : Prison Cooking Recipes - Post Them Here!

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05-18-2002, 09:05 PM
I got a letter from Wayne today with one of his prison recipes and wanted to share it:

"I made a burrito or Bomb Chino as I call them. You mix one individual serving of crushed corn chips, one crushed noodle soup, one crushed bag of BBQ potato chips together in a plastic bag - thourghly combine these fine gourmet items then add one to 1 1/2 cups of hot water to the bag, mix throughly, evenly and seal the bag wrapping in a towel or a month old newspaper. Let sit for 15 to 30 minutes unless you're starving. Empty the contents into a paper plate, paper bag, or anything somewhat clean. Eat with a fairly clean plastic spoon. It's a delight in convict cuisine. Add spices, meats, vegetables as available to suit your own tastes!"

He says he's going to write a cookbook when he gets home. I think the creativity is facinating - do you have any examples of weird recipes?

05-19-2002, 08:48 AM
yuck! LOL

Have you tried any of his recipes? Those poor guys. THey should do a survey which is worst Hospital food or prison food?

Have they passed legislation like Texas Schools Systems that ketchup is a fruit?

05-19-2002, 01:33 PM
I will have to ask JD to share some of his "recipes"... I know they have some really interesting "concoctions".... :)
When I worked inside they used to bring their "dinners" into my office... and even try to get me to "dine" with them.... always had to say thanks, but no thanks!! I joke all the time with JD that I could be the worst cook in the world and he would still probably be in heaven and gain 50 pounds when he comes home if THAT is what he is used to eating... and those little "casseroles" were deemed as a luxury.. Better than whatever they were serving in dietary.... eewwww.... To me, it looks like something my cat may puke up!! :)
Yet another little reminder of how resilient our loved ones are!!

05-19-2002, 07:39 PM
i used to make something simliar to this and it was actually pretty good.. Sounds gross but hey it is usally better then the prison food or the johnnies they serve.

05-20-2002, 09:20 AM
You know I am going to have to ask EJ about what he puts together over there. I remember him talking about some type of nachos the he & others would love to put together when they could get into the kitchen.


05-20-2002, 09:42 AM
They had that crazy Sherriff from Arizona that put all thsoe prisoners in tents om TV last night.

He was touring the prison with a camera crew to check out complaints about his new food system. The prisoner claimed they were getting rotten green bologna. Of ccourse the meal sack the sherriff received was good.

Anyy way he was joking with the prisoners. Saying he feeds them on 49 cents a day and it cost 1.69 a day to feed a dog in America.

He was proud of that. LOL

05-20-2002, 09:45 AM

05-20-2002, 01:13 PM



05-20-2002, 02:04 PM
I guess these guy would think "my" cooking would be heavenly!

Soon back to the kitchen I go.........:D

05-20-2002, 02:15 PM
TORREY!!! I saw that! It was on COPS! Wasn't it funny how he never tasted the bologna when he said the inmates were complaining that it was spoiled? THEN the guys said the salami was spoiled that week.

DANIELLE: Todd sent me a similar recipe...

"A soup & pork rinds is basic, but no matter what u mix in them, they're tasty. Take a thoroughly cooked & steaming hot Ramen, strain most water, add season, add some diced spicey dill pickle, ANY kind of canned or packaged meat (even jerky) diced, a few crushed up rinds, some crushed Doritos, American cheese, a lil bit of crushed Tabaso flavord cheese-its, a spoonful of mayo. Mix. Keep it covered & let it self-cook 4 awhile. Then it can be used with tortilla chips like dip, rolled up in a tortilla (flour) for a burrito then nuked 4 20 seconds or so or gobbled with a spoon, MMMM Goooood! D'oh"

I have to find the recipe with the Honey Bun. I'll post it when I find it.

05-20-2002, 03:39 PM
I'm going to send that recipe to Wayne - see if he likes it! I'll let you know! I know he can't wait to get home - my crock pot specials and hamburger helper have got to be good compared to what they eat!

He complains that the trays are never dry and usually soaked with water - that any bread he gets is watered-down!

05-20-2002, 05:00 PM
>>>my crock pot specials and hamburger helper<<<

Crock pot's OK, but that hamburger helper, well........not in my house!! LOL

I just pulled a bake limon grass chicken out of the oven. When I get back into yard work, I'm going to plant some of that limon grass. It sure does a job on chicken!!! YUMMMMIE

05-20-2002, 07:06 PM
lol anthony always asked me what I made for dinner.. i think he is making a menu up for when he comes home. that way he knows what i know how to cook.. we were talking about the first dinner after he gets out.. i said can you say delivery.. :)

05-20-2002, 08:17 PM
if i remember here's a "cake" receipe a couple of bags, a plate 2 pks of cookies 1 tube of peanut butter and 1 bag of m&ms
you seperate the white and blk cookies scrape out the cream
crush all the white halfs and tiny bit of water crush the rest for a crust. get a plate but down the first layer of dry crumbs mix the cream center with the peanut butter spread over top next the wet cookie mix and crush the m&ms for the top layer. my son says this is how they "celebrate" birthdays and the lucky ones going home. Guess that's how u pass the time at 17 in jail at least they still try to look forward to things :) note he use to hate peanut butter before he was locked up now it's the best thing they serve. peace to all cl

05-20-2002, 08:51 PM
Thanks for the cake recipe. I will also forward it to Wayne and get him to send back any he has.

05-21-2002, 07:01 AM
I'll ask some recipes too...kinda interesting how creative these men can be...and knowing that a lot of these men never cooked before they went in...

05-21-2002, 08:05 AM

05-21-2002, 11:53 AM
My kids always complain because they miss Stephen's special omelettes..he was always so creative--I can only imagine what he is cookin' up in there...He has told me that every night they have what they call a "spread": everyone contributes something, soup, chips meats whatever..then they let it "cook" wrapped in a towel and then they spread it on bread or a tortilla..seemed kinda gross to me cause they throw anything in there--prison surprise I he came home after being arrested the last time he tried to get us to try out his new culinary skills--NO WAY! I told him...all he wanted to eat was Ramen soups-(and he HATED them before he went in-go figure!?!?)

05-21-2002, 12:05 PM

05-21-2002, 12:15 PM



05-21-2002, 07:39 PM
that is true but that is why we have so many overweight people in the world too :)

05-21-2002, 08:35 PM
I don't think it's "food" per say, but the type of food and the way it's prepared, that brings about the overweight people.

Overweight related deaths in this country is 2nd to smoking, the government say's.

05-22-2002, 09:50 AM
I guess we need some inmates on this one...:p

05-22-2002, 01:39 PM
They make amazing foods there. Some inmates can whip up some good foods. When we hear it we're thinking 'eww' but it could actually be very good.

05-22-2002, 07:20 PM
jail house tamales are really good too. they sound nasty but they are really alright

05-23-2002, 06:48 AM
I don't really know what kind of foods they are allowed to take to their cell, like can they have spices and all that?

05-23-2002, 12:08 PM
I think most prison are getting away from "Cooking" and handing out cold cuts and vending type foods. They are trying to end hot food since the prisoners don't get to eat it hot anyway.

05-23-2002, 12:13 PM
I hope, if they really decide to give them cold food instead,that they won't give everything raw, because that;s not healthy

05-24-2002, 10:26 AM

05-24-2002, 11:24 AM
In one of the VACATION movies, Chevy Chase's brother in law was grilling Hamburger Helper with out the hamburger.
yummmmmmm yummmmmmm

05-28-2002, 11:09 AM
The majority of the foods Steven eats is from the commesary.

05-31-2002, 03:29 AM
does anybody know how the guys brew their own wine? is there's a change that it's dangerous for their health?

06-01-2002, 06:36 PM
I'll have to ask David tomorrow when I visit.

06-01-2002, 06:43 PM
They use any type of fermented (rotten) fruit. Mainly oranges. That's why it's considered contraband when they have more in their locker or cell than they are supposed to.

That's one thing Todd said he would never can make you verrrrrry sick if it's not done right.

06-01-2002, 07:03 PM
In Tennessee at the prison where my Mom worked, it's called Julip and the main ingredient is bread (used for the yeast). I am not sure about the recipe - but will ask!

06-05-2002, 09:41 PM
Junior works in the kitchen. When I go to visitation the CO's sometimes have a tray of food it is the same food the inmates eat. (I asked) If the COs grub on it, it cant be all that bad. Ive seen scrambled eggs, pancakes with butter and syurp, a mini box of cereal, milk and an apple. Thats better than I eat.


06-06-2002, 03:54 PM
>>>they won't give everything raw, because that;s not healthy<<<

Over here, we have a different view in that reguards.
At least when it comes to veggies and fruits, where everything "raw" is healther as long as it's clean.

As too meats, they have found an enternal cooking temperture that is concidered safe.

Just a difference of opinion I guess??

06-06-2002, 04:39 PM
I'll try to remember to dig up that comissary list from one of the IL facilities so you can see what some inmates are allowed to keep in their cell. Don't hold your breath since that thing is buried deep in some letters! Not that I don't love to go through those! And I'm waiting to see if my guy sends any little "recipes" of his own. He claims to be a decent cook!

06-06-2002, 08:00 PM
Wayne keeps snack foods from the commisary in his locked box in the dorm. Taking anything from the cafeteria is grounds for a write up or worse - no salt, pepper, sugar, etc. He keeps chips, snack cakes, and even sodas pretty much all of the time. These items aren't just snacks - they're also used (along with cigarettes ) to play poker, bet on sporting events, and as payment for things like cards and drawings that Wayne does. If he charges $2 for a card then he exchanges the card for 4 fifty cent items from the commisary. It's not just food - it's inmate money.

06-06-2002, 08:06 PM
Well I think I found an area where I know alittle about the subject. There are definately prison recipies. You can buy food, & in calif, have food sent in. So we have to think of different & creative ways of cooking this stuff up. Oh yea plus if you have a hook up in the kitchen you can get things from there too. In Calif. probably the best known item is called a spread. This can be maid for one or for as many as you want. The biggest spead I saw was for about 50 guys. Like most prison recipes there are many variations depending on taste. Also most of these recipies are used in jails too.

The Spread:
The main ingredient is Top Raman soup. Use 1 soup per person (if you put alot of extras, 2 soups for 3 people), crunch up the noodles & throw in the spices from the little packet. Don't worry about mixing flavors (it's all good). Pour noodles & spices into trash bag. Now comes the fun part you start adding all the stuff you like, cans of tuna, hot sauce, flavored popcorn, spicy cheetoes, corn chips, (don't use potatoe chips), basically you throw in anything you can get. Then you add enough HOT water to cook the mess, tie the trash bag closed & let it cook. You spread a newspaper (AFTER it's been read) on a table & open up the trash bag & everyone grabs a fork & you all stand around this spread eat & talk. If you cook this for a guy on the outside he will probably leave you.

Peckerwood Sandwich:
This is for desert. Get 2 cookies, the bigger the better, Grannies cookies are what we use. Get a brownie & squish the brownie between the cookies. For a little extra you can pour pudding over the concoction & it will feed 1 to 2 guys.

Poormans BBQ.
Get a beef stick & cook it on a lighter.

I have more but you get the idea.

06-06-2002, 08:23 PM
OH boy,
this is fun, another subject I know about. To make what we call PRUNO, you double up two trash bags (don't want any leaks) & put as much fruit as you can get, oranges, prunes, apples, raisans, they will use anything. Put in the bread if you can't get yeast from the kitchen. Then you add sugar alot of it. I never saw anyone measure anything. Then you add water. Close up the bag & let the mess cook. We put the bag in a T-shirt tied up the openings so the guards would think it was a water bag for weightlifting. When they shake down a cell, they just have the cell block porters take waterbags down to the shower to dump out. Once it's in the shower with all the other waterbags they find, they have no idea where the PRUNO came from. If you do get a batch done, it will get you drunk. You use a T-shirt to strain the mess then toss the shirt & the goop down the toilet (DONT throw it in the trash). I have tasted it & it sucks. I never drank enough to get drunk, but others have. Just seemed like to much work for something that sucks so much.

06-06-2002, 08:45 PM
That sounds like some pretty nasty stuff :yuk:

06-06-2002, 10:46 PM
No wonder my friend is so skinny!

06-06-2002, 10:50 PM
Sounds like you would be too busy with the trots to enjoy a buzz, anyway!

06-06-2002, 11:21 PM
Scary. Isnt it.

06-07-2002, 01:44 AM
Sounds nasty indeed, but thanks a lot for the very clear explanation!!

06-07-2002, 03:29 AM
I had wondered how it was done!

06-07-2002, 03:31 AM
Thanks for the insight!

06-07-2002, 10:47 PM
Up until a few years ago, prisoners here could get food packages at Christmas. The packages could come through the mail or be dropped off at visitation.

One of my husband's friends who lived in the town where he was incarcerated would take frozen steaks when he went for his Christmas visit. At that time, there were no microwaves or any other cooking devices available to the inmates. My husband loves rare steak, but I didn't think he was eating it raw. I nearly fainted when I heard how he "cooked" the steaks...

The water fountains had an extra tap on them for hot water - so hot it was almost boiling - so the guys could make hot drinks and ramen soup. They'd let the steaks thaw and then hold them under the boiling water long enough to give them a "rare" quality. I'm just glad he had enough sense not to do that with pork!

The friend naively assumed that the inmates could take their food to the kitchen and get someone to cook it for them. When I told him about the water fountain cooking, he began cooking the meat before he delivered it!

06-07-2002, 10:56 PM
This is not cooking-related, but Carla's comments about the oranges brought it to mind. Back when food packages were allowed at Christmas here, my husband's parents sent him a small box of oranges. The prison officials almost didn't let him have them - not because he would have had enough to make brandy - but because those little stems were still attached. Their excuse was that he or other inmates might roll the stems in cigarette paper and smoke them. Have you ever heard of anyone smoking orange stems?! None of the guys had ever heard of it, but of course, some wanted to give it a try once they found out the officers thought it might produce a buzz.

My husband got the oranges -- AFTER all the stems were removed by prison staff!

06-07-2002, 11:11 PM
I took my husband some homemade biscuits one Christmas, not because I can bake good biscuits but because he asked me to try. They turned out ... different. I told him to toss them in the trash if they weren't good. He always shared his Christmas food with men who didn't get any, and one elderly man with no teeth chose to eat nothing from the table but my biscuits. None of the other men cared for them. (Tells you how bad they were when starving convicts pass them up! Dog wouldn't eat them either!) Anyway...

My husband kept offering the man other foods from his stash, but the man only wanted biscuits. My husband asked him if he thought the biscuits were good. He said, "Every morning when I was a little boy, my mama baked biscuits for breakfast. When I came to prison, she still baked biscuits for me every Christmas. My mama died a few years ago, and I ain't had any homemade biscuits since then. Your wife's biscuits taste just like my mama's - God rest her soul, that woman never could bake a decent biscuit! They taste awful, but they remind me of my mama."

That's the sweetest insult I've ever had.

06-09-2002, 12:58 PM
My hubby makes the noodle stuff all the time. He RARELY eats what they serve at chow. He says it's pretty good considering the alternative.

06-09-2002, 08:19 PM
awwwwww bookgirl, that was the sweetest thing he could have said. Did you bake him anymore?

06-10-2002, 05:59 AM
that is so sweet indeed!

06-10-2002, 07:52 AM
what? I never heard of it.... maybe it has something to do with the glue that is on the stems? that, when you smoke it, it gives a certain result? like the people who sniff glue....sounds crazy though

06-10-2002, 11:38 AM
on the "wine" making issue... I will share what I know... this was one area where I got a lot of "training" because when I worked inside the walls, I was running a drug/alcohol program... so pretty much every guy in the housing unit was an alcoholic... :) Here in IL, they call it "hooch"... and they use a similar method to what KConnor described... except they would use fruit and whatever little cartons of fruit juice they could sneak back from dietary (they could never get their hands on actual sugar... so the little juices is where they got the sweetness.... They also used bread.... But the stuff takes a LONG time to actually ferment and STINKS like you can NOT even imagine!! I got to encounter an actual batch only once in my time there.... but I swear ANYONE who would actually CONSUME the stuff would have to be a hardcore alcoholic.... because it is NOT a tasty little cocktail with a little paper umbrella.... it is some nasty stuff!! The guys always had to go to great effort to hide it here... they can't have waterbags like KConnor described... so they would hide it in their laundry bag, or try to hide it in some common area so if it was found they wouldn't get busted... Generally, they got busted before they got to consume their concoctions... the stank kind of gives it away!! :)

06-11-2002, 04:11 AM

LOL, your right I almost forgot about that smell. We had to burp the bag to keep it from exploding, & the smell would just permeate everything. Its one of those horrible smells that once you smell it, you'll remember it forever. Nothing else smells like it. I hated the stuff cause guys would get drunk, & start fights, & become very volitile.----Ken

06-11-2002, 04:25 AM
Yes, while your locked up spreads are ok, what you have to do is find a recipe that works for you. My favorite was I would pour a packett of ramen noodles & spice packett in to a bag of jalepeno' popcorn, add hot water & let it cook. For extra flavor I might add some hot sauce. Some prison meals I just can't eat like liver, & chow mein. There are many guys who eat their own food, & rarely go to chow. I'm a cheap SOB, so I wasn't going to turn down a meal unless it really sucked. It's institutional cooking but all in all it's OK---Ken

06-11-2002, 04:31 AM
Wayne said he bought a bologna sandwich the other day and it "tasted like a steak." He's pretty cheap too and won't buy food unless the chow it just too nasty to tolerate.

06-11-2002, 08:05 AM
Steven sent me his comessary list a while back, some things are pretty cheap except for high priced items like TV's. It may be low to us, but it's expensive to them because they usually don't have the money.

06-11-2002, 10:01 AM
LOL.. Ok! I admit! I'm guilty! I've drunk it myself and got buzzered.. :)

Probably 5 times during my 27 months I drank "hooch".. And it is definitely not brand wine! The hangovers are RUFF even when you don't drink a whole lot, but they always sell out of the stuff.

As for making it, we had 3 different guys in our unit alone cooking it up.. Thursday night was the night to get up in the shower stalls and remove the lighting system and get down the trash bags. It always helps when you have one of the guys from facilities loosening the security screws for the people who need to remove them.

Sometimes the CO's would search and even find a batch or two. They were not really hard about the wine until this Super CO that is always hunting for wine on the compound got up in the ceiling in the until above us. He found some bags of wine and proceeded to yank them out.. One of the bags just happened to catch on a sharp edge and rip! Now, having him covered in hooch would have made most happy as hell BUT he was up in the shower stall cubby and when that hooch let loose it hit a power source, SPARK! He got zapped off the ladder and down onto his arse.. Covered in hooch! He was ok but beyond pissed, especially with 120 guys laughing hard at him.
Normally, I wouldn't think this is really funny but this CO was a real jerk and taunted inmates like few others. Most of the other CO's were laughing about it too. That's actually how we found out. The other CO up in the unit hit the deuces when he flew off the ladder, just because it scared her so bad. When all the CO's raced out of the unit and then came back, they were beside themselves, "That's what Super Cop gets".

Anyways.. I could tell you how to make this stuff but KConner covered it pretty well. There are a lot of variations. Main ingredients are Sugar, Fruit and bread balls.. You can do it in a jar, all the way to a 50 gallon vat. Just need a little time to make the wine.. Save a little "kicker" for the next batch. (Some already cooked wine will accelerate the next batch fermenting)

"And that is all I have to say about thaa at'"

06-11-2002, 12:52 PM

06-18-2002, 11:54 AM
how sad.....

06-18-2002, 12:27 PM

06-18-2002, 12:48 PM


06-19-2002, 03:56 PM

The way we use to make jailhouse tamales was to take a bag of fritoes corn chips, & a bag of spicy hot cheetoes (you can use doritos too, or any spicy chip), crunch them up as much as you can. Mix them together in a chip bag. Add just enough hot water to turn it into a thick mush. Kneed the bag to mix the contents well, drain off any water (if you do it right there shouldnt be any). Roll the mix up in the chip bag in the shape of a tamale, & let it cook (sit). After about 5min, tear the bag open & pour some hot sauce over it & dig in. It comes pretty close to tasting like a tamale.

We also would make peanut brittle that came out pretty good. When I got out my family wanted to know what we ate so I showed them. Somethings they thought were all right. My son probably liked them most. It gave him ideas so he could make them himself, & they were different. He's always loved ramen soup, & he liked my personl spread recipe the best. To this day he still occasionally eats one, as I do too.

06-19-2002, 06:45 PM
very creative-

should be a book of these recipes

06-19-2002, 10:40 PM
My husband is now working in the kitchen! Well, I am screwed....when he comes home he'll never want to cook again. :p He said that he had to cook 270 dozen eggs the other day!!!!!!!! It makes me laugh. We are lucky though because now that he is in the kitchen...he doesn't spend as much money on food when he goes to store!!

06-20-2002, 02:57 AM
so he won't bake you an omelet when he gets home....that's too bad ;)

but I'm glad to hear he has a job!

06-20-2002, 06:26 AM
montysgirl: follow this link to get an idea of what your hubby will be working with ~ there's a recipe at the bottom of the page for chicken and dumplings ~ for 375 people! :)

06-20-2002, 07:33 AM

06-25-2002, 08:59 AM
I bet you hear a lot of stories from him!

07-01-2002, 07:46 PM

07-01-2002, 07:57 PM
Ya I'm sure when he gets home food/cooking will be the last thing on either of your minds :D

07-02-2002, 08:12 PM
When I supervised the prisoners in a facility of 1400, we unloaded about $11,000 worth of food each week. The price was an honest receipt for it came from "Food World" warehouse as wholesale. Can you imagine walking to the check-out counter with your groceries. The cashier completes scanning your items and says. "Yes mam, that will be $11,000, please." You say, " What, I may have to put something back". LOL.........38 Special.........

07-02-2002, 08:16 PM

07-02-2002, 08:27 PM
Ms. AG's Friend:
During my training period with Ala. DOC, I was assigned at the bottom of the state. I was about 200 miles from home and could only return on the weekends. I would be so hungry for things other than food that I would nearly tackle my wife upon walking in the door. "Food! You better come here.""Honey don't break the table."...Wups!.......38 Special........:)

07-02-2002, 09:07 PM
Food and my favorite dish:
2- eggs 1- Large fresh & sliced bowl of okra (You know, layed down on the cutting board and cut into round pieces. You ladies know all those fancy words, but I do not.). 3 to 4 - Fresh vine ripe large green tomatoes. Corn meal- sprinkle and mix enough that covers all ingredients. Milk- enough for moistening the meal after mixing all ingredients. 1-2 -onions chopped (if you like onions, but not required). Turn on oven and heat to 250 degrees F.
Dice those tomatoes to the size that you like (That's a man thing----"Like I want it!"). Slice that okra. Dice those onions. Mix together with your hands. ("Oh! My God it's so sticky. I know, don't you love it."). Drop two broken eggs into the mix and stir with a spoon. ("Not use my hands?" "No, you complained too much about being sticky."). Sprinkle corn meal into the mix while stirring until all ingredients is covered well. It should be dry and non-sticky now. Add milk until slightly soft and doughy--- not falling apart (Like you mix corn bread). Stir well. Stir well again. ("Why you stirring so much?" "You gotta do something while your oven heats."). Pour and place ingredients into a flat pan that will allow a layer of about four inches (four fingers high). You can use two pans should you need them. Bake until bread is done. The vegetables should be soft by this time also. Can be served alone in slices for the vegeterian or with your favorite sliced meat. Enjoy!...Happy eating>>>>>>>>>>>>>38 Special....................:)..........

07-03-2002, 12:37 AM
Mr. Fed-X:
That story reminds me of a funny story. We had a group of kitchen guys that loved making "Julip". They would put a state issued plastic cup in the bread mixer bowl. Call the steward (supervisor over food preparation), he/she would pour the yeast in the bowl, watch the guy mix the yeast and flour, and go back to the office. Well, the steward did not know about the cup nor did he know the guy was acting as though he was mixing the flour and yeast. Instead, he would shuffle the flour around the cup. Afterwards, the cup would be removed with about a half of pound of yeast.
We had an officer that was a "Super cop" that we called "Hound-dog". He could smell the julip as it brewed in the ceiling above the exhaust unit of cellblocks. One day, Hound-dog climbed into the top of the mop closet above the exh. vent for a bust. He got hung, but noone in the unit would help him nor report the misfortune. He remained in the unit closet about two hours before the cubicle operator stopped talking on the telephone to his girlfriend on the other end. The officer knew Hound-dog was in the block, but thought he was watching television. Hound-dog had to tear his shirt from his body where he could free himself. He came out of the closet looking like the chimney sweeper in "Cheety, Cheety, Bang, Bang" (Walt Disney movie). He had black colored dust all over his face, body , and trousers. He never went into the closet vents and attics again.
Hound-dog would smuggle marijuana into the facility in cigarette form, hide the cigarettes, and pretend finding it for a better rating at evaluation time. Hound-dog observed the bread cooks hiding the yeast and would exchange it for powdered bleach. He thought it was amusing watching the guys reveal that their yeast had been stolen.
Hound-dog later got caught in a homosexual act with one of his informants and was fired.

The winemakers would make julip similar to Mr. Conner's direction by using fruit cocktail, sugar, yeast, and water inside a plastic bucket. They preferred a plastic five gallon floor wax bucket with the narrow spout. The spout could be covered with a rubber glove or balloon for pressure and fume containment. They said that it made the wine stronger.
The wine in most Alabama facilities sold for one pack of name brand cigarettes per (8) eight ounce cup. I have found open five gallon buckets with a small portion remaining and cockroaches floating in it. I know they died happy from over intoxication......Cheers!..........38 Special.....................:)..

07-03-2002, 01:12 AM
I had a prisoner that I thought was an excellent salad man until I observed his sweat dripping from his nose into my bowl.

Our breakfast trays had eggs, sausage gravy, flat biscuits w/ a spoon of jelly, honey-butter, and oatmeal or grits served with a cup of juice (Kool-aid), cup of coffee, and a carton of milk. I ate it all the time and loved it.

Some of the kitchen prisoners would make 15 to 25 sandwiches such as BBQ, hamburgers, and bologna,egg, and cheese (BEC). They would put the sandwiches in whatever kind of bag they could find and smuggle sandwiches out of the kitchen inside their pants. I was told that a sandwich could cost as much as three packs of name brand cigarettes.

We once had a Commissioner that vowed cutting prison cost and removed all extras such as jelly, mayonaise, ketchup, mustard, napkins, and all the extras that we take for granted. The practice lasted until election of a new Governor.

I thought you might want to know,..........38 Special...:).

07-03-2002, 04:48 AM
My husband worked in the kitchen somewhere in Alabama years ago and used to smuggle hamburgers out to sell. They called him the "Hamburgler." :)

07-03-2002, 06:17 AM
danielle: please tell me he didn't weat a black mask and a wide brimmed hat, too! :D

07-05-2002, 03:50 PM

Your right about the prices. The food stuff & other things wern't too bad but when your locked up your not making much money, so you try & make things stretch. A lot of guys when they leave will give away their TVs & stereos so they stay inside, we call them floaters. It's easier to come up with stuff on the outside than it is when your inside. It's a must to leave any walkmans cause they can make tattoo guns from the tape players.-----Ken

07-05-2002, 04:02 PM
LOL, David & 38 Special, you guys bring back some old memories. Our "super cop" we called "ROBO COP". & after having a bag rip open soaking his pants, & shoes, he had the porters (prisoners who cleaned the cell block) take out all water bags just in case. David I completely forgot about saving the kicker. The guys would bounce it around from cell to cell trying to stay ahead of cell searches, it got comical sometimes.-----Ken

07-06-2002, 09:51 AM

07-06-2002, 09:57 AM
Right after my Southern-bred, Yankee-raised heart!
That just sounds like mom's cooking through and through.

07-06-2002, 04:54 PM
sounds delicious- i will try it next week!

07-17-2002, 11:52 PM
When Kenny and I were hurting for money at the middle of the week, we'd often scrape up enough money to get what we needed for a batch. Let me tell looked EXACTLY like what I feed the dogs! He'd heat cream cheese and Velveeta with a little milk to make a thick sauce. Then he'd throw in the ramen noodles, a can of Hormel chili, crushed nacho dorritos, and pepperoni. Sometimes he'd also add beef-a-roni or tuna, but that was a bit too much for me. Jalapeno peppers are optional. Actually, it wasn't that long as I melted the cheese...he has a habit of burning it.

07-18-2002, 12:10 AM
I remembered a couple of more last night talking to some old convict friends.

A tootsie pop= Make a mug of hot chocolate, but make it so the water is just hot enough to disolve the powdered hot chocolate, then add kool-aide. Cherry is best. Let it cool & add cold water. It taste just like a tootsie pop.

I forget what they call this one, but you make a cup of coffee with as hot as water as you can get, then you take a three musketeers candy bar, & put it in the very hot coffee, & disolve it. It Taste like a really rich chocolate coffee. If you make it with strong coffee, this will have you bouncing off the walls.

Peanut brittle. Take a lot of sugar & mix it with hot water into a runny syrup, you can also add pancake syrup, & mix this with peanut butter, & add peanuts. Spread it out & let it dry. Viola peanut brittle. Pancake syrup adds a distinctive flavor to it so don't add too much.---------Ken

07-18-2002, 04:35 AM
These are great recipes!

My husband made his own cough syrup a while back when he had a head cold. He took orange juice and heated it up and dissolved cough drops in it, then sipped on it. He said it was the best cough syrup he ever used!

07-18-2002, 07:26 AM

07-19-2002, 01:21 PM
I have heard about this stuff! My ol man calls it "hooch" and it is made from fruit juice, sugar and yeast or bread. All this is mixed up and put into bags and buried outside somewhere until very ripe. Then you let the air out and bury it again until ripe again. I have heard it is super stout and will put hair on your chest but I will get you toasted.

07-19-2002, 01:33 PM
What creative foods! Tee has told me all sorts of food he has eaten. Like soft shelled turtle, rabbit and his favorite ramen noodles and tuna. He says the turtle has seven different flavored meats in it????

08-27-2002, 11:22 AM

09-15-2002, 11:27 PM
Prison chow must really vary from state to state and institution to institution. Ohio has good chow at many institutions. Real Milk Ice cold and fresh from the prison dairy, then really good butter. We also had real steak and chicken several times. On a few occasions we had a fund raising drives for various things and We actually got to place an order a week in advance for Dominoe's Pizza two per inmate max.

The bad food however at my first institution was terrrible and the kitchen filthy. Luckily we were allowed to food boxes from home twice a year.

09-21-2002, 06:57 PM
Hubby is in crc in Orient, Ohio and he hates the food. He buys most of his stuff from commissary. He lives on Ramen noodles and little debbie like snacks. He loves his chocolate, but between the heat and the ants it goes to waste if he buys it. He has to eat most of his sweats asap or the ants get inside the packages.

09-23-2002, 04:41 AM
The food at the prisons I've been to here in Calif has always been fine. It's institutional food so it's kinda bland, but with salt & pepper, & what ever sspices you bring with you to the chow hall it's not bad. Some meals we even looked forward too, & some we hated, but it was more of an individual thing. Mon thru Fri we got two hot meals. breakfast & dinner, & sandwiches (2) for lunch. Sat & Sun we got 3 hot meals. In the Orange County Jail the food was also fine, with some meals being better than others depending on personal taste & we got three hot meals 7 days a week. As long as you ate in the chow hall your portions were good size in jail & prison, but in both if you had in cell feeding the portions were smaller than the chow hall, but were basically fine.-----Ken

09-24-2002, 05:36 PM
Every Saturday night, my guy and his bunkies get a couple summer sausages, and macaroni and cheese from the store and cook it up. They claim its the only identifiable thing they eat all week.

09-25-2002, 10:17 PM

I've had the spread. The one I had was made with Ramen noodles/potato chips for the dough, then they put squeeze cheeze on it, and sliced up slim jims, with tuna and diced pickles. Scary, but edible, just gotta close your eyes and use your imagination. I enjoyed the experience, but my stomache on the other hand was pretty pissed the next day!


09-25-2002, 10:24 PM

Spreads are a trip, & everyone makes them different, in fact they are pretty much made differently everytime we make them. Ramen noodles & what ever else we had laying around. It was brave of you to try it. It looks & smells bad, but as you found out they taste Ok, but the next day can be fun, LOL. ---------Ken

09-26-2002, 10:10 AM
my husband has been cooking at his unit for a while, I'll forgive all those comments about how bad the food is! ;) But recently he was asked to become a cook in the ODR. I guess he must be pretty darn good. The only thing he ever cooked for me at home was brisket...yummy! I guess he is moving on up in the prison world!

09-26-2002, 12:36 PM
Well two thinks comes to mind, either he will be a hero among the troups or catch a lot of flack, depending on what he is ALLOWED to do in the kitchen.

09-26-2002, 12:37 PM
yummy yummy, nothing like a good cook. :)

Joy Roy
10-03-2002, 12:09 AM
Well, at least when he comes home he can't say he can't cook. LOL

If I was lucky, he would barbeque. LOL

Sometimes I think the only thing Chris could make was......Reservations. My favorite!!

Joy Roy

10-08-2002, 01:07 PM
I was talking to Stephen last night and we got into food (one of his favorite anyway, he is always telling me what creative things they come up with for their "spread" 9as they call it) at night....then he went on to say that when he comes home he is going to put together a prison cook first it sounded odd but then I thought of it it would be some really creative, low-budget meals that are interesting......any body have any recipes they would like

10-11-2002, 06:36 PM
Amelia~ That is sooo funny because I was just talking to Robert the other day and he said he actually sent me a recipie for me to try out with the kids. He calls it his personal pan prison pizza! When I get it in the mail I'll share it with you! :)


10-12-2002, 06:47 AM
Stephen is always sending me new things to try..some of them don't seem all to appetizing love to here about this pizza Stephen is dying to for some pizza!

10-13-2002, 09:37 PM
I will post it as soon as it gets here! Although Stephen might still be dying for pizza after he tries it!! :)


11-11-2002, 12:43 PM
OK I want to revivethis thread...Stephen has aksed me to collect prsion cooking recipes from all over so post some recipes and your loved ones name and prison (if you want) will be a book like the ones churches and schools put out.

11-11-2002, 02:23 PM
Anyone want to setup a web page?

I just did a 22 search engine thingie (one at a time) of the top 99 engines,, and found NOTHING for "prison cooking recipes".

11-11-2002, 02:29 PM
This is the only link I have ever been able to find on prison cooking:

11-12-2002, 01:03 PM
this is a great idea, amelia, wish i had some recipes to share.

11-18-2002, 01:30 PM
anyone have any ideas of how to make the vending machine foods more palatable? i am totally sick of them all...

11-18-2002, 01:33 PM
we have: candy, all sorts of chips, microwave popcorn, hamburgers, burritos, chimichangas, lunchables, tuna fish, little containers of new england clam chowder, beef raviloi, mac n cheese, frozen pizza, egg rolls, philly cheese steak...geez, in listing these things they don't SOUND so bad, but they ARE

12-18-2002, 07:05 PM

Soul SLiver
12-18-2002, 07:35 PM
We take the popcorn, roll it up into little balls and while it's still hot, rub some m&M's on it...chocolate popcorn balls...I know...ewww but it's something.

Also, we sometimes get adventurous with our drinks and mix them together.

Hot sauce on the burgers makes the A-O-K to eat. Almost like a regular burger.

Don't eat anything with bacon, cuz it's all gonna rip you a new one.

We get Coffee and anything sweet (chocolaty) and mix them together.

We're wierd, like little kids, we mash up ketchup packets and mustard and see what that tastes like.

12-18-2002, 07:57 PM
We put chips on our burgers. It made them sort of crunchy and gave them flavor.

We also mix Sunny Delight and Sprite to make a sort of punch.

12-18-2002, 08:42 PM
We dip chips and popcorn in ketchup and mustard mixed. Makes a sorta dip.


12-18-2002, 09:30 PM

I am afraid that I cannot help you - other than Teddy always grabs a handful of packages of mayo and mustard and ketchup and it is a ritual of squeezing these horrid condiments onto the already horrid food! I am not sure that it does anything to make it more palatable...

I may embarrass myself here but after 4 days of visiting and eating this crap, I leave 'bunged up' and don't get back to normal for several days!!!! LOLOL

Sorry to tell everyone this but it is a clear reflection of the quality of the food!

12-20-2002, 02:01 AM
I don't know Emme! All Sonny ever wants are Snickers bars and vanilla coke! Oh, we had a turkey pita sandwich on Thanksgiving! Yum!! And he'll drink orange juice once in awhile cause he doesn't get it at "home". lol

12-30-2002, 11:03 PM
My boyfriend says they make something they call a moley. apparently when they have hamburgers or hotdogs they all take the bread......mash it all together and roll it out. Then they take meat, chips, whatever and spread it out on the bread....then roll it up and boil it......He says its good.....ha.

01-03-2003, 01:34 AM
something i like, a peanut butter and sweet pickle sandwich.

01-03-2003, 01:34 AM
Everybody say, "YUM!"

01-03-2003, 01:36 AM
Let's hope your hubby will enjoy cooking so much, that he will come home and make you a wonderful meal. Am I dreaming? LOL

01-03-2003, 08:39 AM

01-05-2003, 08:00 PM
i learned about the spreads when i was 14 and have been making them ever since i love them the kids love them and my favorite is geting the ramen and a bag of chile verde doritos all crunched up then put it all back in the bag comes out like a tamale is what i think he calls them. any way thought id share k later

01-21-2003, 10:47 PM
That's funny because I actually have a loose leaf book of prison recipe's ranging from microwave cakes to rice a roni made in brown paper bags that was put together at the Womens prison in Clinton New Jersey ! maybe we can combine forces and make some money ! LOL

01-23-2003, 02:57 AM
well that might be a good thing though. maybe when he comes home he will actually cook more than just briskets....... wouldnt you like that?

01-23-2003, 05:42 AM
When Wayne first started working in the kitchen, he put on weight. He's since lost it, but working and cooking does have it's perks.

01-23-2003, 09:34 AM
when lee was in the kitchen, he hated the job, but he loved being able to eat so much more. he wasn't a cook though; he was a server. i do think he mentioned the cook position being highly coveted. brisket sure sounds good....

missnj 1966
01-23-2003, 06:31 PM
your recipes were all cute. Is there anyone in this room with love ones inprisoned in the state of New Jersey.if so please wright me back.

missnj 1966
01-23-2003, 06:38 PM
bookgirl that really was cute. i think my biscuits would be like that also . but it very said because no one would even attempt to eat mines. they would probably use them to stop up the toilet with .

02-14-2003, 03:53 AM
My man recently told me that about the chow lines in TDC there are signs posted that read:

CAUTION: Some ingredients (sp?) used in preparing food has been known to cause cancer in some lab mice, eat at your own risk.

and the same for the jucies that they serve. So basically, unless I keep enough money on his books that he doesn't have to eat that nasty shit he could end up with cancer because he was hungry.. THAT DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

02-16-2003, 12:20 AM
I'd be interested in some of these recipies, if anyone has any.

02-22-2003, 05:47 PM
Here is something they make at the deerlodge montanan prison sticky egg noodles with tuna juice poured over it this is their tuna casserole what human should have to eat this slop their our innocent people and their are guilty people in their but they are still people why not serve them real food they get enough tax dollars I mean come on

02-22-2003, 06:03 PM
Some prisons actually have good food and some it is not so good. I know where my Partner is, there are days that he eats and days that he would rather eat junk in his cell than face what they are serving.

He did work in the kitchen and so he knew that most of the ingredients were decent - it was just that everything seemed to come out tasting like nothing...

This tuna casserole however sounds delicious. My only question is - If they have tuna juice, where is the tuna? I did not know that you could buy just the juice. No one should have to face food like this.

02-22-2003, 06:07 PM
the must save it for something else i dont know my dad did say their were a few stray strings of tuna in there you just had to look real hard

02-24-2003, 12:27 AM
That's disgusting! I voted no for you!! :)

02-25-2003, 10:53 PM
Teb I agree with you. For the most part the food in prison & jail was decent. Everyone I know gained weight. Naturally there were days I would eat in my cell because I didn't like what they served. If you didn't have anything in your cell you go to chow, & trade your tray for food from the canteen with someone. I hated liver, but I knew guys who liked it, so I could trade them my tray, for food they had in their cell. I never went hungry, & it was only once or twice a month I didn't go to chow.I have eaten stuff that looks & sounds terrible that really isn't all that bad, a spread is a good example.---------Ken

P.S. Many guys complain about the food, but the kitchen has no shorage of people wanting to work in it.

02-26-2003, 12:18 AM
Travis use to work in the ODR and of course in there the food was good and he gained weight and stayed healthy. But due to all his college courses and trade classes he took on this past year he had to switch jobs. He does not like to eat in the inmates chow... the food in there is disgusting! But when he has too... he has too.


03-14-2003, 10:56 AM


03-15-2003, 11:02 AM
My Jeff used to talk about the "cook ups" he and his work out partner would make... All I could think was YIKES.. The really sad part... He worked in the kitchen... And could still never eat and enjoy the food....

03-16-2003, 10:10 AM
Brian and were talking about a new "recipe" yesterday. Not everyone will have access to this probably but just in case someone does, here's another idea... see, his cellie works for the chaplain so he is frequently in charge of cleaning up after various gatherings where the refreshments will usually include cookies. Frankie found that if you take the bags the cookies came in - which, naturally, will have crumbs in the bottom of the bag - then kinda mush all the crumbs up together and add just a little bit of water - voila, you have a cake. So far I think they've had an Oreo cake and a pecan shortbread "cake" like that. :)

03-16-2003, 10:57 PM
can I send Joey a microwave ?????????????

03-16-2003, 11:35 PM
is there one out yet? i know tyrone would love a copy if so.......... lmao
that would be sooo cool

03-17-2003, 07:05 PM
when i was in the co. jail.We use to make what we call a break.3or 4 guys would get roman noodels they we would all pitch one thing in chips,peperoni sticks,chees crackers.exct.we would make the noodels then we would crush all the chips; cheese crackers and what ever we had all together and it taste good.So good luck with your cook book

03-19-2003, 11:51 PM
If you can get your hands on some salsa, it's quite yummy in Mac & Cheese.

03-27-2003, 11:29 PM
I know how to make a cheesecake in prison. :)

04-21-2003, 12:01 AM
A couple years ago my homeboy got out of prison and made us some hooch. It was the nastiest thing I've ever drank. He thought it would be cool to share that with us. I was sick the next day, but I guess it made him feel good cause we stuck through and found out a little about his time locced up.

04-21-2003, 01:08 AM
Worst I ever saw (or smelled) was made with tomato paste....

That stuff was disgusting....You would really have to want to get drunk to drink it.....and as far as the smell goes...almost impossible to conseal it... far as quality goes I have seen many homeade "stills" which would produce something virtually equal to pure moonshine....They used mainly potatoes to make it.....also have seen someone go blind from drinking the stuff too....don't think it is worth it because no "buzz" is worth losing your sight....

04-24-2003, 01:36 PM
I know that on New Years Eve some of the guys made it and Carlos drank a little bit...but he said NEVER AGAIN!!! He also said something about shampoo...I'll have to ask him when I see him tonight.

05-08-2003, 08:07 AM
I haven't been to see my honey yet but my best friend went three times to feed him and he always eats the pizza, and the icecream. we have pretty good machines but the thing i am NOt looking forward to ... he supposedly mixes mayo and taco sauce and puts it on EVERYTHING. i tease him about it and he just says "thats the sh** baby! " my brother buys these little packs that have pepperoni sticks and cheese sticks and adds them to the little mini pizzas and loves them.

No accounting for taste. When i was visiting my brother I usually just had a dr. pepper and popcorn.... but my baby says..."oh youre GONNA eat." Oh my! another man that wants to keep his FAT GIRL FAT!


05-09-2003, 10:08 PM
Absolutely not!! They already feed them nothing but some kind of supposed pork and cabbage as it is:( Talk about YUCK!!! lol

05-22-2003, 08:15 PM
My man has told me the same thing about the juice in Tarrant County. He said one of his cellies used to work in the kitchen and it had that posted on the juice label. Also J told me that they poured that juice on some paint painted on concrete and the paint began to peel away.

05-22-2003, 08:19 PM
Are these only on signs or in handouts, etc? I'd like to scan some and post them if anyone has them.

05-22-2003, 08:25 PM
I think it is hearsay. Everyone knows someone who has seen it, but no one can prove it, unfortunately.

05-23-2003, 01:31 PM

05-28-2003, 09:48 PM
In some prisons the men lose weight if they don't have money for the commissary. Illinois is like that.

05-28-2003, 11:05 PM
Sonny says that when he gets out he will never have Bologna or any type of chicken ever again!!! I send him steak sauce in his quarterly package and he tends to put it on everything!

06-08-2003, 01:39 AM
Here is another one and I have to say, I like it myself and I have never liked pancakes or peanut butter.

On your pancakes add:
Butter/margarine - This is optional, i do without it.
Then peanut butter
Then syrup

This is really good!

In your plain oatmeal add:
peanut butter
syrup, brown sugar
mashed banana
broken cookies or crumbs
mix all together

06-13-2003, 01:05 AM
DONT MENTION THE WORD TURKEY HAM around my sweetie or bologna or salami (which is still literaaly icy half the time) They seem to think the guys love the stuff and heck even the guards joke about how nasty it is.

07-07-2003, 11:45 PM

07-08-2003, 01:23 AM
billy does not EVEN mention the stuff they call "FOOD" in huges unit--nor do i ask him. i do know that he has lost a considerable amount of weight (in about 2 months)--due to the fact that i couldnt send him money. i KNOW that he relies on what i send him...he practically LIVES on the food he gets from comissary...oh well, guess i will need to ask him about the type of food he recieves. lol *gag*

07-08-2003, 01:26 AM
jesus that is just WRONG. makes me want to gag just thinking about it. now i will think twice about sending him $$$ each month.

07-08-2003, 01:35 AM
That ain't no lie, Diane. Texas loves to fed our guys pork! Anything with cholesterol! If they would just follow the menus from Huntsville it would be nice. One day, they served the fried chicken to the boot camp, trustee bldg. and officers, but the thousands of inmates inside the main bldg. got chicken patties. This has got to stop! An inmate is an inmate and the officers can bring their food from home as far as I am concerned. Anything the state provides for the inmates is for the inmates, not the officers, or chosen groups of inmates. We all like fried chicken down here in Texas. (Did I vent?? lol)

07-08-2003, 01:40 AM

Everyone one Johnny's run works in the kitchen. I will see what we can come up with. God Bless,

07-09-2003, 11:03 AM
As a student of chemistry for over three years now, I can tell you that there are quite a few substances in everyday food that can cause cancer. For example, who knew that vitamin c can cause cancer?? It actually does if it's taken in a high dosage. I don't know what exactely they put into the food in Texas, if I knew I could give a precise answer. I wouldn't panic now because of that. If there was really a health risk, I guess they wouldn't put this substance in the food.

07-10-2003, 06:44 AM
The prison where my husband stays had 6 guys in their 20`s die last summer from food poisoning.They wrote them off as having heart attacks.If I didn`t send my hubby food money he would die in there.They serve half cooked pork all the time.He is allergic to fish and they get tuna the other half of the time.Meeeoooowwww Grrrrrrrrr!!

07-10-2003, 08:16 AM
I've been to my second appartment yesterday night and also fetched my books about food chemistry. I'm concerned about what they put in the food there, maybe not only in Texas, but also in other states. So, if anyone can come up with a name of a substance, I'll do some hours of research and can say more about it. There are quite a few substances, mostly preservatives, which really should not be used in food. If it's really a health risk, something must happen to change that situation.

07-12-2003, 02:09 AM
I'm gonna have to call bullshit on that one. I'm from Missouri so you're gonna have to show me where you found that information. Maybe you shouldn't believe everything coming from a convict's mouth. Just a thought.

07-12-2003, 09:19 PM
lol magnum

07-13-2003, 02:12 PM
Stanley will never eat oat meal again if he can help it. They serve that almost EVERY day for breakfast or lunch.

07-19-2003, 10:06 PM
My man will not eat prison food at all. He eats in his cell. He is healthy as a horse too. :-) It's taught him how to cook, so this duty he will take over for me when he comes home in 1026 days! I just hope he knows how to use pots and pans, and not just crock pot and coffee maker to cook for me :-)

07-20-2003, 03:27 PM
I was in six different five of them I went hungry because I could not afford commissary. Since I paroled in February I hae gained 20 pounds! So, I can attest to the fact that in WV the food inside is horrible!

07-20-2003, 06:38 PM
Justice is forever "ruined" when it comes to pancakes!!!
He says he'll never eat them again. Poor baby! :(

He is a big boy and needs more than the three "square" meals a day....sometimes he says they give them bologna sandwiches for dinner. Grown men need more than fake meat! Eew!!!


07-21-2003, 03:11 AM
From the Federa Prison Camp in Dublin CA

1 12oz coffeemate creamer
4 pack vanilla pudding
2 lemons
20 vanilla wafers
4 tbs butter

cursh wafers real fine and add melted butter..pat down to make crust.

in seperate dish, spoon in pudding, squeeze lemons and stir into putting. ad reamer a little at a time stir good each time you add cramer to mixature.. Stire in enought to make it thinck about 9 oz of the creamer. pour pudding mix on top of crust.
(we would chill by placing dish in ice machine and have someone keep eye on it for about 45 minutes, but ok even if not chilled.

07-22-2003, 04:08 AM
Thank God I can say that I haven't had to use these recipes for awhile now and I pray that I'm never there to use them again. But for those who are, they sure are yummy . . .


Crush a bag of Ramen Noodles up
Crush a small bag of nacho cheese doritos up
Add noodle crumbs and seasoning into the dorito bag
Squeeze in a package of Nacho Cheese
Pour about 1/2 Cup of boiling water into the mixture
Squish all together and flatten out
Fold the end of the dorito bag up so the heat can't escape
Let sit til mushy
Trust me, it's delicious

You can also substitute boiling Rotel Tomato Juice instead of the water and it gives it even a spicier kick



For Sauce---Mix soy sauce with sugar and flavor to your own
teriaky taste

Boil noodles and drain. Add the sauce, some microwave-fried spam and canned corn. It tastes better than it sounds!!!!!

07-22-2003, 04:13 AM
I've had that and you're right it is delicious. And it's filling.
Aloha, Kaleilehua

07-26-2003, 02:58 PM
I know you are all going to think this is crazy, but!!! It is actually very good. We get the pizza's and put mustard and hot sauce on them. Better than eating cardboard with plastic cheese that doesn't melt!! Give it a try! Not bad really. KJsTT

08-14-2003, 11:04 AM
Well Louie is only in county jail right now. Last time he was in prison (a three hour ride from where I live and I only got to visit once) we didnt eat anything. I kinda liked where he was because you can visit with any inmate from 9 AM to 3 PM. But I didnt get to stay too long. It was the weekend after Christmas and I had to drive back up to catch a train to go somewhere in the City with my mom. But he told me that the food in the vending machines weren't too bad. He came home about 2 weeks after that and I fattened him up real good with some home cooking. :)

08-14-2003, 02:50 PM
We have the standard chips, cokes and candy. There is a machine with lunchables and sandwiches in it. Montys will not eat out of it. He says it would either taste like plastic or would be spoiled. We usually feast on pork rinds, bugles, m&m's, Dr. Pepper and Root Beer. Those dumb machines don't have COKE in them...can you believe that! How unAmerican!

08-19-2003, 09:30 PM
A content in the juice or any other food will be found on the content label. The label is attached to the drink/food can. Someone get a copy and let us do an investigation for lawsuit purposes. We can be rich from their promotion of cancer causing ingredients to people that have no choice, but consumption. (Class Action). Get your loved one send a label from a can in the mail. PM me with your proof, 38 Special

08-19-2003, 10:37 PM
You go, guys!!! Anything like this is great if it can be proved.

08-21-2003, 10:14 PM
i think a lot of people gain weight on the inside because all they eat are CARBOHYDRATES, which isn't too great for you. white bread, for example, is just as fabulous for you as eating a cup of sugar! the poor guys need some fresh veggies w/ every meal to help balance that out!

oh, and GottaLuvJustice ---- i LOVE LOVE LOVE "fake" meat! i'm a vegetarian and soy-based fake meat products totally ground me. do inmates relly get fake meat, or do they get REAL meat, just Grade F quality like they served in my high school cafeteria?

08-30-2003, 07:28 PM

This doesn't sound very appatising, but I can confirm it tastes better than you think.

you need
1 pack of freeze dried non-dairy creamer
1 pack of freeze dried instant hot chocolate
a little bit of sugar

mix all ingredients into which ever "packet" has a foil inner lining and "shake them together" as best you can. Then, (be creative) and light the paper on fire. It will burn off and leave the foil lining. NOT UNWRAP THE FOIL UNTIL YOU ARE SURE IT HAS COOLED OFF! The fire will cause everything to melt together, and you have a "nice little cookie."

You can be creative and put whatever else you want in your "cookie" but you MUST HAVE the CREAMER and COCO!

disclaimer: if it is illegal/against the rules to light a fire in your cell, then you might not want to do this.:D

09-04-2003, 12:09 PM
When my husband was in Helena Oklahoma at JCCC and he worked in the kitchen...he said the boxes were stamped..."NOT FOR HUMAN CONSUMPTION"....what is up with that.....he always makes his own meals out of canteen stuff.....I feel for our guys.

09-04-2003, 06:52 PM
OMG how horrible, and there feeding this to HUMAN beings? This is crazy, im a tell my man about this and see what he says or if he can maybe read whatever hes comsuming first b4 he does. Crazy i say again ha, ya uh, big lawsuit coming if you can get prove, or better enough cant ya just send the environmental haazrd place out there to check the foods and conditiond to make sure there not unsanitary? just a idea. ktc

09-04-2003, 07:08 PM
Yuck, yuck, yuck. That's all I have to say. *gag*

09-06-2003, 10:34 PM
A bunch of administrators got their hands slapped because it was found that instead of spending the money for the prisoner's meals in the holding cell at the main police station in Honolulu, they were buying baby back ribs, steaks, etc., for their officers. The main man under gunfire his last name was Fajardo (I'll say his name because it was ALL over the media). He was also named in a sexual harrassment suit brought on by one of the women on the police force (that was settled out of court and I have to say that the woman didn't get as much money as she deserved, but that was because she had sucky lawyers).

Even though this happened in cellblock I still believe that it's probably reflective of the prison system all around. My old man has to eat those nasty chicken patties or turkey ham too. And this is in Hawaii. I guess crappy prison food knows no cultural geographical boundries.


09-17-2003, 05:46 PM
non dairy creamer burns if you light it, burns quite good.

09-17-2003, 05:48 PM
A friend who worked in the kitchen in an Arkansas jail also told me the "not for human consumption" signs were on food boxes. I do know for sure when he got out and accually at good food, he threw it up, for about a year.

09-18-2003, 04:03 PM
no no no no... you don't light the creamer itself. you light the paper you have put it into. ONLY do that if the paper has a foil inner liner.

09-22-2003, 08:45 PM
I kind of doubt the story about the juice that peels off paint. If it's true I want to know so I can get some to take off paint! Years ago I got prevention magazine. I read that nitrates are carcinogenic, like found in bacon, sausages and hot dogs. I avoid having those very often. I'm not sure if they still have food dyes that are iffy.
If the prison is issuing a warning, they should post EXACTLY what foods it is, what additives it is, other wise they are not giving the inmate information that he can use, to not eat those specific foods. Most cannot just not eat the prison food!

09-22-2003, 08:57 PM
Originally posted by lil_tx_q_tee
So basically, unless I keep enough money on his books that he doesn't have to eat that nasty shit he could end up with cancer because he was hungry.. THAT DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe the key issue of his letter is " unless I keep enough money on his books "

We`ve all heard the rumor, and we all know that are carcinogens in most everyones daily diet...prisoners and the free world. However, no prison is going to knowingly serve and willing post a sign that something they are serving you could kill you...

things that make you go hmmmmm ?

09-24-2003, 08:30 PM
I never want another pack of ramen noodles as long as I live. That was our staple and they are cheap and taste like dung.

09-25-2003, 06:58 PM
I have a simple recipe that I made while in prison and I STILL

09-25-2003, 07:06 PM
I have a simple recipe that I used when I was in prison and I STILL eat it today.

Bag of Ramen noodles crushed in a bowl,
Enough water to cover. Put a lid on and microwave for 3 min.
Take off lid add Ramen spice package, spoonful of cheese(processed or real), chopped jalepenoes, stir, put lid back on , sit for 5 min.
Eat with crackers or put in a flour tortilla(noodle roll up)

09-28-2003, 05:48 PM
This is the best thread I've visited here at PTO! I'm going to collect the recipes and send them to my baby and he can share them. Also, thanks for the website link.

Bookgirl, that was the saddest and sweetest and most wonderful story i've EVER read. I cried both times I read it. I'm so proud of you for cooking those bisquits - I'll be you never imagined the joy your cooking would bring someone. What a jewel you are!


09-28-2003, 08:45 PM
Well, the recipes here are better than the ones posted on the "Cellblock Cafe" those had you frying stuff in oil and had ingredients I think would be hard for ME to find, much less trying to order from Commissary.

09-29-2003, 01:49 PM
i agree juliwaits.......the work camp my brother is at has limited stuff in canteen and no use of a stove or crock water and thats it.
ramen noodles, 18 wheelers, peanut butter and oatmeal.....not much to do witht hose ingredients and it anyone ahs a recipe other than those "burrotis" or spread id love to have it!

10-05-2003, 03:51 AM
My brother and my hubby has both worked in the kitchen at different prisons in Alabama, several years apart...
(1982--2003)....and they both have seen the boxes clearly marked "Not for human consumption" on everything from the chicken nuggets and fish sticks, to the cans of tuna (mostly juice)...some of the 5 gallon jugs of grease or cooking oil even had "recycled oil" marked on the labels and said you could see bug legs and wings floating in the oil they had to use.....I'd hate to know that I had to cook with or eat something that has been deep fried in bug infested grease that probably came from some fast food restaurant....

10-07-2003, 01:16 AM
Ok...A couple years ago I use to be a supervisor in a max kitchen...there were quite a few times when I would argue about the meal and quite a few times when I refused to serve boss just loved me!!! LOL!!! There were times I worked all day and I wouldn't least here in Kansas...I feel for the guys!!!

10-07-2003, 04:16 PM
My husband hates to eat in the mess hall. When he eats there, he is extremely careful what he eats. He usually lives on commissary foods and things I take in every month when I visit. He loves shrimp and he loves to cook. He can't wait to get out and make some decent meals!

10-10-2003, 01:01 AM
um ok....who the heck voted yes to the poll? Are you crazy?????

10-14-2003, 08:10 PM

10-15-2003, 01:08 AM
Ok folks, This one is gonna be a little hard for ya'll to believe. I am an employee of TDCJ. I hope I am not stepping on toes by posting on your forum, we tend to get upset whenever inmate families post on our sites. My purpose is to help clarify, not cause any trouble.

TDCJ does have the signs posted. The drink or juice whichever you wish to call it is what it refers to. The ingredient is saccrein (sorry for the spelling). I would not be concerned. It is in a product called "Sweet Sub", which is a sugar substitute. I have never seen anything labeleb not for human consumption in 9 years of service.

10-15-2003, 07:04 AM
You are welcome here as long as everything remains cordial.
Thanks for the info,
David (Fed-X)

10-15-2003, 08:03 AM
where did the caution sign come from?

10-15-2003, 09:52 PM
MY man takes in tortillas into the mess hall to use at breakfast for the eggs and the meat like lookin stuff on the tray. lots of tobasco!!!!

10-16-2003, 04:36 AM
Squash a Milky Way bar (I think that was the one we used) and break it up into pieces and put on top of a Honey Bun... Then nuke the Honey Bun long enough to soften and start to melt the Milky Way! Ummmmmm!!! Good!!! But very hot so be careful...

10-17-2003, 09:55 PM
The sign is posted in all units. I beleive that it is required by law.

10-23-2003, 01:49 PM
If there are substances with saccharin, it makes sense that htey would have to post the warnings. In many respects, it is not any different than the warnings that are put on cigarette packaging.

What most people are unaware of is some of the methodology that led to the determination that sacharin was potentially carcinogenic...during some of the testing that led to the determination, the lab rats were given an amount roughly akin to what you would ingest if you drank something like 200 cans of diet soda on a daily basis (Somewhere at the house, I may still have those files since it was a national debate topic way back when...and being the eternal packrat that I am, I keep everything even though it may be useless and trivial and untouched except to move from one residence to another).

More information about saccharin and warnings can be found here...

11-12-2003, 02:45 PM
Here's a website I found for prison cooking:
The Cell Block Cafe (
I hope it's helpful! :wave:

11-15-2003, 04:01 PM
Eddy says the food here at Rush City is "ok"....but they feed the guys turkey in every imaginable form. He said he will not eat turkey ever again when he gets out, guess I can't blame him, he wasn't much of a turkey eater anyway.
He does a lot of in-cell cooking and has sent a few recipes along that I'll dig up in his letters and put together for y'all if you'd like to pass 'em along to your men :)

11-15-2003, 04:04 PM
We don't even HAVE vending machines at Rush City...sheesh...

11-24-2003, 03:28 PM
My husband called me the other night saying the "guys" had taught him how to make a jail-house tamale. He said that you crush cheetos until they're powder and then put them in the cup of ramen noodles that they get, but then he lost me when he said something about putting it under a blanket to cook...I don't know!

12-02-2003, 02:19 AM
Personally, I would not call this a "recipe", but my boyfriend said he learned this in prison in Washington over 10 years ago. It is fun seeing th looks on the guards faces who see him doing it!

Ingredients: 1 Snickers bar, 1 package Grandma's cookies, oatmeal raisin works the best, chocolate chip is pretty good.

Put Snickers on the floor (in wrapper, of course:D ) and flatten it with your foot. Now open the cookies, take one out and flatten the other one the same way. Take first cookie out and flatten the second cookie. Now open the snickers wrapper and break it in half. But both halves on the cookie, put second cookie on top to form a sandwich. Put his sandwich back into the package and flatten the whole thing again. Take it out of the package and eat.

It's not my favorite thing, but he tells me it is a classic! Yuk!

12-03-2003, 11:35 AM
I had a friend that was in max for 6 years and when he got out, he would throw a fit if he even found a box of fake mashed potatoes in the house. He told his wife that he never wanted to look at them again, much less have to eat them.

Eric's Homegirl
12-11-2003, 07:03 AM
My husband will never touch top ramen, chicken, or turkey ever again. He worked kp and he said the amount of grease that was on the pans were enough to make him up chuck.
He said they used to take top ramen, tuna, beans, and other
canned item that was in there packages and throw all of this
together and then eat it! Just hearing about it makes me wanna up chuck with him!! He said the chow hall cooking is the
worse food imaginable, I say lets feed it to all the co's and see how they like it!!!!

12-11-2003, 09:13 PM
my guy who is out now made raman the other day like they do in prison, and i said we have a stove here hello!!


12-17-2003, 03:23 PM
My husband did 13 years in the joint and he said anyone who wants to make those mushfake "breaks" at home are out of their mind! He says he just wants to forget all of that, including the food!

12-17-2003, 03:40 PM
angel33, my friend made that for me once. It was good. yummmy

12-25-2003, 10:00 PM
I remember how soggy those microwave pizzas are but my "kid" really loves them and ate a couple each day. He must miss pizza. For guys who rarely get a visit, that vending machine food was a real treat.

01-01-2004, 11:51 AM
Magnum - husband did 10 yrs in MO prisons and after reading your reply he said "Ditto" He also said that too many times guys in prison tell wives things that are not true or are exaggerated. He also said, "They are in prison, not Holiday Inns."

Don's Kitten
01-05-2004, 07:13 PM
These recipes are cool! I sent some to My Baby. He makes this stuff he calls "dip". Have any of you heard of that? I'll have to see if I can get the recipe from him!! Thanks for sharing!

01-05-2004, 07:25 PM
Oh my Gosh

Did these posts bring back memories!!! We made jailhouse houch, a mix of oranges and apples and bread, fermented to a horrible juice that resembled alcohol (cotraband big time) and made bread pudding in the microwave. And rice with soup base in it. Then we carved the breakfast apples and filled them with vaseline, stuck a match in the center and made candles. Sat around and had rice and bread pudding for dessert and thought we were home for a moment. Peace.


01-08-2004, 08:39 PM
Am sending these to my creative chef
tomorrow. He's going to be amazed.
Will ask him to send the "dip" recipe.
Also a current favorite involving rice and canned fish and who knows what else.


By the way, where will the "cook" book
be published?

01-16-2004, 06:47 PM

01-19-2004, 06:24 PM
My husband is a great cook. I learned how to master this rice recipe that he does. Also his fried mackeral is delicious. However, I did NOT like the fried rice. (smile)

01-31-2004, 07:56 PM
I have seen a tray for our loved ones, yuck. I was in the visiting room when one of the guards came in with a tray, I asked Dean "is that what they feed yall" yes he replyed. The tray had a piece of bolongia, rice(dry), plain maccironi, and beans. This is not a good meal. If a diabetic had to eat this his sugar would be so high. I have seen this on many occasions, no vegatables just starches. No wanunder the need canteen so much.

01-31-2004, 10:22 PM
I received a letter from my brother yesterday telling me about the food.One day they served mexican food for supper at 5 pm and by 7am every unit had a waiting line for the bathroom and 500 people reported to sick call. Raisins have dead cockroaches in them, rocks mixed in with the potatoes, spoiled milk for breakfast and the beef is multi colored. Mice run somewhat freely in the kitchen and coackroaches are everywhere in the kitchen, dining area and food warehouse.

01-31-2004, 10:33 PM
I worked in prison kitchens in 3 different federal facilities. Know that federal inmates were eating canned turkey from Desert Storm in 1999. The turkey looked like the rainbow. The oatmeal can be cooked after all the bugs are removed from it. Should I say more? Oh the chicken, that precious chicken day, usually served on Fridays, (They know how inmates are waiting for that day) is cooked for 15-20 minutes until it reaches 165 degrees (enough heat to kill any bacteria) and then taken out of the oven almost raw; so no one can really enjoy it because it is not edible. Sad.

02-01-2004, 06:45 PM
Damn the prison that Louie's at now doesnt have anything good like that. Just your standard chips, candy and soda. No hamburgers or anything. Louie does come up with some interesting combos at night from his canteen though. :)

02-25-2004, 12:24 AM
My husband tells me the food is very bad. So, I just send him money every two weeks to order stuff from the store because I rather him eat that than the maggots, rat poop, and anything else he say they want to make part of the food they serve and he gets sick. They have to pay to see the nurse everytime they go for a visit to the nurse and even for the medication they get. How horrible. They make you sick, and then charge you to get well knowing you don't have much money especially the people who don't have anyone on the outside who gives them financial support. So he just doesn't deal with that. He only drinks the juice or milk when it's not spoiled, otherwise he buys juice mix and make his own stuff. My husband is very creative and he hasn't lost weight or gotten sick the 5 years that he has been in prison. He lives solely off the stuff he buys from the store. 7 more years to have to deal with this. Then he will be home for some real food.

02-25-2004, 01:47 PM
I haven't seen it but I have smelled it. If I ever get anywhere near it I have to go outside. It turns my stomach. I have come so close to being sick just from the smell. It is sad.

02-27-2004, 04:59 AM
What you have said has made me sick to the stomach, now I am going to tell you something that is going to make you angry.
My husband, in prison in Australia. I called the US embassy here. They made a US ambassador come out to the prison, inspect it, make sure that if fell under the United Nations treaty, and also, made sure he had proper food and vitamins, minerals, medical, air venting, etc etc.
It makes me angry, that a ambassador in Australia can come to QLD for a little holiday and inspect a prison. But it makes me ANGRIER, when I read what you are stating about the food, it makes me feel physically sick. Where is the help for these guys? Maybe this ambassodor should go re read the UN treaty and inspect these prisons. I am not saying our country or system is perfect, I hate it, right Amy :)
BUT.... I can honestly say that every morning, our men get fresh bread, 5 loafs actually amongst 6 men in a prison style apartment. They get fresh vegetable, such as tomatoes, etc, fresh ham to make there lunches, and peanut butter so they can snack at lock down, as well as other stuff, for breakfast. Fresh milk is delivered daily, they all get 500mls of fresh milk delivered to the prison, with fresh juice. Dinner is meat, delivered locally by a local butcher, veggies, delivered daily, but a local fruit market. I dont know what there was to inspect. The food was excellent quality. I knew the chef in there, he was a inmate. They actually assigned kitchen hands as jobs, and have to follow the same rules as a resturant, hair nets, gloves, everything has to be done properly. If there is a bad meal served ( as in someone didnt like the taste) god help the person that cooked it, as all the guys would put a complaint in, and this person would be thrown out the kitchen.
My point is, WHY send a ambassador here to check on a US citizen when this is going on in your own prison systems. You are better off being arrested abroad, no matter what the crime is. The US will make sure you live like you are eating in a 5 star hotel.

02-27-2004, 03:38 PM
OMG - On the fourth of July they served "ribs" these things were the so big - every one was calling them dinosaur ribs - until we tried to eat them - couldn't even bite 'em. One of the girls asked the c/o for a special phone call to the local race track so she could tell them what had happened to their horses! :) :)

02-27-2004, 04:04 PM
the only thing he eats at the chow hall is breakfast. he'll eat the oatmeal, and he always grabs a few of the hard boiled eggs -- which i'm actually amazed that they have. he eats everything else out of the commisary. he has never seen vegetables or fruit where he is-- which i think is awful. aren't they in the food pyramid. i wonder if there are any laws regarding nutrition in prisons like there are for schools? RESEARCH ASSISTANTS??? (your new assignment is....)LOL

02-27-2004, 05:52 PM
My baby puts peanut butter on everything!! :)

03-13-2004, 10:33 PM
They don't serve slop in Ohio pens the do sever pork but of all the men I have ever met since the sixty's and now in ohio prions the pork will get you sickalways has alway will it seems and eating in the cell and trading is were the guys here gain weight.Ever here of roman noodles well ever man in the ohio pens all know what those are and how to make a multitude of filling meals out of them. I have seen some of the concoctions and they closely resemble slop.

03-13-2004, 10:45 PM
My man told me the other day he can't wait to come home and cook for me. The very thought makes me sick. I can just think of something he might try to cook all I can think of it that it's something he had to learn in prison YUCK!

03-19-2004, 09:22 PM
My husband said this is how they make a prison birthday cake ( in Texas State prison at least)

you take two Honey Buns, melt a hershey bar over it and sprinkle crushed M&Ms over it...and that is a prison birthday cake they give their buddies in prison off commissary.

my husband also says what is goos is:
you take the coffee cake they give you at meal time sometimes and add a little milk to it so its really moist and eat it with a spoon.

03-29-2004, 05:48 PM
What is the nastiest thing your man tells you he eats or drinks?
Marcus says he mixes coffee with red kool-aid and peppermint....I am like what the heck is that. Sounds like something that would send you to the toilet. He also told me one time the made some wine (when he first got to TDCJ about 10 yrs ago) the wine was made out of old fruit cocktail and bread that they kept for a month and burped it. I am like what is that???? Something else that will send you to the toilet!! :)

03-29-2004, 06:07 PM
Corn chips and peanut butter, he's says it good, but its not something I think I will be tring anytime soon. The things they come up with LOL

03-29-2004, 06:23 PM
Ewwwwwww!! Nasty, nasty, nasty! :ha:

03-29-2004, 06:25 PM
My vote is for the vending machine food. One time I bought a sandwich out of the refrigerated vending machine and it was molded. There is a big sign that says "buy at your own risk" I took that risk and wish I would have saved my money. But as far as food they make it would be the "burritto" made out of corn chips and hot water. Sounds gross. Which is better moldy food or prison creations?

03-29-2004, 08:32 PM
He takes cheez-its and crumbles them into chili.
He also appears to be able to cook anything on his radiator. I tease him that when he comes home, I'll find him making dinner in the furnace.

Don's Kitten
03-29-2004, 09:39 PM
ramen noodles, mayo, cheese and tuna all mixed up together
& peanut butter on honey buns!
ewwww! My poor Baby!!
can't wait to cook him a good meal!!!

03-29-2004, 09:48 PM
My man puts chips in his top roman. I thought it was nasty until I tried it and I love it! He also puts shrimp, and just about anything else in it. I stick to the chips!

03-30-2004, 12:08 AM
Don's Kitten, I can't wait to cook my baby a good meal either! He has eaten stuff in there he wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole out here. LOL He used to make fun of our grandkids for eating the Ramen noodles, and he eats them every day now. With cheese in them too. Said one time they made a cake out of cookies and pudding. Scraped the insides out of the cookies, heated that in the microwave and "frosted" the cake when it was done. Since he has been so creative in there I am going to have him cook some for me when he gets home. NOT! I have been practicing some new recipes, and plan on cooking for him for the rest of our lives when we are together again.