Hello ladies,

I feel so stuck...like in mud or quicksand... I want out so bad but everytime I try to get out I'm just stuck again. Talking about this mess my husband has left me in. Often ask God why he has me in this. You have no idea how I have tried to get out of this and it never works. This last time was a doozy. I thought I'd just find a boy friend and that would help to get over my husband. It didn't work. I get soooooooooooooooo tired of being alone and waiting and waiting! So sick of it. I go see him...I write....can't afford calls. Anyway...sad but true everytime I'd do anything with this guy (who I have known for 20 years-my best friend's brother-in-law who is cute and has a job and really likes me) I'd just want to be almost sick and run from him and I'd just constantly think of my husband. I bet God is laughing at me right now AGAIN! I try to get out of it and I find myself wanting to be with my husband even more. I wrote to him to tell him to take me off his visiting list. Thought if I don't/can't go see him maybe I'll get over him. Really want to cuz I hate this prison thing. Really hate it. Well if he ever really did I'd probably freak out for real. Just wondering if anyone else has struggled soooooooo to get out of doing something God has shown them. I know I feel kind of like Jonah and the whale...he ended up there because he did not do what God wanted him to do. Moses didn't want to be the rescuer of the Hebrews. I wish I could just give in to what God wants...but I'm trying to buck it like a broncing buck. Wonder if God will ever tame me:) ?Any advice would be great ladies...thanx!

Michelle

Are you trying to get out of the marriage? Finding one man to replace another does not work honey. You need time to yourself. Sometimes we get ourselves into things and blame God for it. Sit down and write out what it is you want to accomplish, step by step and how to accomplish it. Try and find peace with God and yourself! God loves you more than you can possibly understand. Nobody is perfect. Make a decision and stick to it. There are no easy answers. Spend time in prayer and stop being so hard on yourself :)

I find that sitting down and make a list of advantages and disadvantages helps some. If you do have a prayer life, God will show you what to do. He doesn't always ask us to do the easiest thing - just the right thing. His grace will sustain you - even when things don't make sense and seem just to hard to take. Yes, we have all been at our wits' end many times, but the question is - where are you going to go? If you are continually thinking about your husband, another man is not the answer for you. I understand sometimes relationships do end, but you need to end one relationship before starting another. It sounds like you are just really lonely and loneliness can make you do things you would not otherwise. We all have to govern ourselves the best we can so we aren't regretting the choices we have made later. One truth is that sometimes life gets so crazy everything is spinning and we are totally confused. If that is the case, making a major change is not a good choice unless you know that you know that is what you must do. Keep in mind we are not super woman - even if we were we'd forget where we parked the invisible plane....

(((Michelle))))

PM me...I stopped by to see you one day last week, but there was a sign on the desk that said "testing".
I waited a bit, but had to leave.

Let's get together, ok?

Jazzjaws, I can relate to what you're saying. I've tried to leave my husband and girl could not for the life of me accomplish it. I didn't take the other man route because that's not the answer for anyone, but I did try to get away and just be by myself.

What I learned was I could not leave him because it was not God's will. My husband needed a special wife and because that is me -- the order on my life was to be his son (my husband's) wife. So I sucked things up, stayed strong in prayer, in church (from TV) and in reading my bible because I LOVE JESUS and just did the darn thing called "marriage" because that is what He wanted me to do.

It's not all peaches and cream but there are a lot of peaches and a lot of cream so we're doing it. The man is the head of the marriage and the woman is the influential backbone. I have come to reallize that me and my husband's destiny is tied to each other so we always try to do this marriage pleasantly and in love. God wanted us married -- that's why He would not let me leave my husband -- so it was either we do it happy or we do it crazy because no matter what, we was gon do it because that is the call on our life. So, we made a conscious decision to do it lovingly, and things are working out beautifully.

P.S. My husband has always been loving, supportive, encouraging and very positive. I had to work on me because of issues I had with his bid and the things that happened before things resulted with incarceration. I don't know your situation but with me, I am woman enough to acknowledge that it takes two and that if there are problems, don't finger point but instead look into yourself and check yourself. I'm not saying this is what you are to do, I'm just saying this is what I've done, and continue to do because I never stop working on my marriage. The day I stop working on my marriage will be the day that it dies and the only dead things I want around me are dried out roses because even dead, they're still beautiful.

i married someone else trying to forget Larry because I was not strong enough to deal with the prison thing back then in 2002....but my feelings for Larry only grew stronger and ended up ruining the marriage that should have never happened. True, one man does not replace another....
I am marrying Larry the 21st of Jan, 2006 - good times and bad....he is not replaceable. Only you know if you are strong enough to wait it out, if you arent then be true to yourself and HIM...good luck....

Great message!

i married someone else trying to forget Larry because I was not strong enough to deal with the prison thing back then in 2002....but my feelings for Larry only grew stronger and ended up ruining the marriage that should have never happened. True, one man does not replace another....
I am marrying Larry the 21st of Jan, 2006 - good times and bad....he is not replaceable. Only you know if you are strong enough to wait it out, if you arent then be true to yourself and HIM...good luck....