Hey everyone,
I'm new to PTO but not so new to the Alabama prison system. My boyfriend has been in prison since 2001 and is now in Draper CC. I've not been able to visit him since I live in Kansas and I'm told that he can't have any female visitors other than his wife,(or blood relatives) who won't sign divorce papers, and until he does I we can only write letters.
He's been hoping that I'll find a place where I can find support in dealing with this long and sometimes painfull journey that we're taking.
I did recently get a new pic of him and his daughter. His wife finally brought his daughter to see him after 4 years.
I've read some of the threads posted about Draper and it doesn't really sound all that bad. But curious to know if there is anything else I should be aware of when dealing w/ Draper.
As of yet I haven't had much problem w/ them w/ the exception of having some pics sent back to me.

Hi and welcome to PTO and to the Alabama forum.

I've never personally dealt with Draper, though I think my husband has been there in the past. I'll ask him when he gets home.

It sucks that you can't visit! However, we're here for you during this time and I'm glad you're a part of our family. You don't have to face this journey alone. :)

Once again, welcome!

hi monica and welcome!

i'm from ohio, so can't help you out to much.........this is definately the best place to come for support, 24 hrs around the clock too!...........its too bad you haven't seen him in so long though, does he have much longer?

Welcome to PTO! You'll find a wonderful support system here. Glad you joined us :thumbsup:

welcome to pto, and you are in luck, this is the most wonderful place you'll ever find for support and understanding.

I've not ever dealt with draper either, my husand did spend a few years there before we were together but i've have heard him speak of anything bad about the place.

again welcome, and i look forward to getting to know you..

take care

denisej

Welcome to PTO...

Welcome to PTO.

Wanted to Welcome you to PTO, I am sure someone here has dealt with draper but I haven't. I wish you the best and you have found a wonderful place here with us.
Looking forward to getting to know you
Brandi

Welcome to PTO and especially the Alabama forum! I have a friend at Draper tho I haven't visited, and my guy was there in the early part of his time and says it's not all that bad. One of our regular Alabama members has a son there and will probably weigh in here soon on how Draper is nowadays. In any case, welcome again and especially to the Alabama PTO family! :)

Hey everyone...sorry that i haven't thanked you all sooner. I lost my home internet service but now have access to the library.
Yea I've heard that Draper isn't really that bad. My boyfriend wants to be transfered to the prison that i guess is directly behind Draper. It starts w/ an "S" and can't for the life of me remember what the name of it is.
My man is sentaced to 25 years for robbery...was told by his lawyer that he'd probably only do 8-10 and as if yet he says they aren't even considering him for parole. His case worker won't even let him bring up the subject. He has been in trouble a few times and even once moved from the honor dorm back to general pop.
He did recently send me a picture and i feel in love all over again with him. I have to say this much though, he isn't looking as bad as i thought he would. When i was married to my ex husband, his brother is doing life in kansas, they brought his brother out for their sisters funeral and i mentioned to my ex that he'd lost a lot of weight and didn't look good. My ex then remarked that 'you don't go to prison to gain weight or look pretty'
But my man has actually put on weight and is looking real good. I miss him so much and everyday it hurts that i can't see him or touch him. But we are good about keeping in touch.
I've had so much go on in my life since he was locked up and he insists that he knows every little thing that is going on. I hate to make him worry, but i had to let him know why it had been almost a month since i'd written him. A couple of months ago i'd went to a party and unfortunatly put myself in a situation i couldn't get out of and was raped. I hated telling him that, but it was almost like i had to b/c we still seem to have little "fights" between our letters. He has been very supportive of me probably more than he should. I'll never stop being there for him. Although he tells me that i shouldn't mess around with him and that i should do what i need to do for myself. He doesn't seem to understand that i'm in this for the duration and nothing he can do will stop me from loving him.
Thank you again everyone for the kind welcome and offers of support. Although i dont get too much of a chance to get online, i will check in as much as possible.

Welcome to PTO. I hope you will someday be able to visit him. I am glad he got a chance to see his daughter. Good luck and may God bless you.:)

I don't see how I missed this earlier...I apologize!
I just want to say WELCOME TO PTO!!! We are happy to have ya w/us...and joining us in the Alabama forum! :wave:

Sel

Welcome to PTO, this site will help you with whatever you need.

Welcome to PTO!

Thanks everyone I really appreciate the support. Although this post finds me a little more than frustrated. Not so much w/ the prison system, but with the boyfriend locked in it.
I got a letter over the weekend saying "I've been kinda holding out on you. Only beacuse I know that you have enough drama with me adding anything to the plate. Nothing serious. I've just been down. Really down of late. I'm just tired of this prison sh*t, love. I dont have any of the b.s. problems some guys have. Actually I have it pretty good if you think about it. I'm just sick of it all........Now half way through my bid this sh*t has become unbearable. Why now? I was doing well enoguth before i got that parole date."
Ok my problem here is HE NEVER TOLD ME HE GOT A PAROLE DATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do I have the right to be upset over this. I haven't even had the nerve to write him back b/c i know that my emotions are going to get the best of me and it will turn into a war of words on paper.
I do realize that there are people in his life who come before me and i totally and 100% respect that. But why is he planning a future with me yet not telling me when that future will start. I dont even know how long he's known about when he's being paroled. Yea i'm happy that he is, but damn, I'd like to know so I can prepare myself.
He does go on to say, "Maybe I just need to get used to the idea-again-that its stilla few more years til I'll touch down."
I dont care how many years...granted it's been long enough. I just feel so left in the dark.

aww, men..are such pains sometimes, but you know what, If it wasn't for me hounding the hell out of the parole board, i'm not sure that Kenny would have come right out and told me either.

strange things happen to our men when they get there parole hearing date, if you read back on some of the other post about parole hearings you'll find that each one of us has had to deal with the emotional rollercoaster they get on. Thank god its over for Kenny and we don't ever have to deal with that board again. I believe they get all stressed out over it, and then i'm sure the other inmates aren't real supportive either..know what i mean?

Thing is, if you are going to be in his life, Tell him how you feel about it, and heck girl..when is the hearing? call that parole board, look him up something, be thankful he's got a hearing. There's not many things about prison that you can look forward to but a Parole Hearing is one of them....

good luck and keep us posted..

Denise

I agree with Denise...My guy is up for parole in less than 2 weeks and everything has been so hecitc at times and we both have been short to each other...he is stressed out and so am I...I think the whole time they are in prison it is an emotional rollercoaster and gets worse at certain times like paorle hearings.

After I'd calmed down a little and chatted w/ other members in chat the other day. I finally started him a letter saying how I felt that he hadn't told me of this. I really want him to tell me on his own. He was a little upset that one time I'd emailed the PIO to find out if he was in the hole cause I hadn't heard from him in awhile (2 weeks) he wasn't, just busy w/ school & work.
But you know I got another letter yesterday and I think that he must think he told me. So I went through all the past letters he's sent checking to make sure i didn't miss anything. I knew had he told me, I'd had posted about it here.
But I agree he is sounding really stressed in his letters and I don't wanna add to that.
I miss him so much. I can't wait till this bid is over and we can move on.